It's About Time
by Koukla22
Summary: Struggling to adjust after being sent back to the Marauder's time, Hermione finds the love she's always yearned for, but at what cost? If James Potter is the man of her dreams then why can't she stop thinking about his best friend?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter nor any of JK Rowling's wonderful characters. I am merely borrowing them.

Welcome to my own little magical world...

**Chapter One.**

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It had been one month.

Well… one month, two days, 17 hours and 36 minutes, if she was going to be precise, and she always was.

One month, two days, 17 hours and 36 minutes since Hermione Granger had discovered herself laying in the middle of the Hogwarts quidditch pitch in a time completely foreign to her.

And it had been one month, two days, 17 hours and 32 minutes since she'd fallen head over heels in love with James Potter.

It was wrong.

No... _wrong_ wasn't nearly strong enough to emphasize what this was. It was immoral, forbidden, dishonest… and so, so right. The Marauders, no doubt out of the castle on one of their many adventures, had discovered her lying weakly on the quidditch field.

Hermione's gaze had immediately fallen upon the young man who so resembled her best friend, her best friend for whom she'd been nursing an unrequited crush for the past six years. But this man… this man who looked so like Harry yet so different, ignited a roaring flame within her that put to shame the mere burning embers of her feelings for the boy that would be his son.

So here we find our heroine, curled up in a fireside armchair in the Gryffindor common room.

At first glance one would surmise that she was intently reading a rather large, leather-bound book but upon further review, one might notice that her eyes were, in fact, focused just slightly above the pages of the over-sized copy of _A Brief History of Time Travel _and were quite fixed on one particular point rather than scanning the printed words.

And if one were truly observant, they would detect the suggestion of jealousy hidden behind the feigned calm exterior she tried so hard to maintain. Because sitting across the common room, at that very moment was James Potter. Sitting, laughing and flirting with Lily Evans.

Oh, how she wished she hated Lily. She wanted to despise her, to wish her harm, to hope for cruel and unusual punishment to befall her… but it was impossible. For Lily Evans was sainthood personified; a walking, breathing angel who, not only, could do no wrong but was painfully and explicitly beautiful.

And at this very moment, Lily was making James laugh, a sound which echoed off the walls and straight through Hermione's heart like a dagger and she sighed. She'd made him laugh.

Hermione never made anyone laugh… true, she could recite _Hogwarts: A History_ verbatim… but jokes? Wit? No. That wasn't Hermione.

She tore her eyes away from the scene playing out across the fire-lit room and back to the book propped open against her knees. Dumbledore was in the process of searching for a way to return Hermione to her own time and had asked that she conduct research in between classes, as well. In all honesty, she'd barely given her research a moment's notice. It was most unlike her but the thought of returning to a time in which James was dead, well… it was just too much to bear.

Risking another glance across the room, she was startled when James' eyes suddenly met hers. Unable to look away, her auditory senses told her that the room had emptied while she'd been lost in reverie. She frantically attempted to form a smile but found herself incapable of doing anything but gaping at the tall, athletic Gryffindor.

He looked at her curiously, as if considering whether or not to sit down to join her by the fire, and began to walk towards her when he stopped mid-step, provided a polite smile and headed up to the dormitories. One would require canine-like senses to have heard James mutter to himself something to effect of "stupid… just say hello… idiot Prongs" on his way up the stairs.

Coincidentally, these mutterings were indeed overheard by the canine-like senses of a large, black dog who until a moment before had been preparing to bound down to the common room to playfully attack his friend and fellow-animagus. Instead, he moved quickly into the shadows just in time to avoid being spotted by James who had paused at the top of the stairs.

Hermione, still gaping at the vacant space where James Potter had been standing only seconds before, closed the forgotten book in front of her. A tingling feeling at the back of her neck made her rise from the chair and turn quickly as her eyes fell, yet again, into those of James Potter. He stood at the top of the staircase gazing down at her.

This time, Hermione's brain did not fail to signal her mouth to smile up at him… they held one another's gaze, tentative smiles upon both their faces. And as quickly as it began, it ended and somehow, over the pounding in her ears that strangely resembled a heartbeat, Hermione could hear James close the dormitory door behind him.

At that moment, twenty-two years in the future, Harry Potter felt a horrible pang in his chest…

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	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

Thank you so much to my very first reviewers. Each of you absolutely made my day! I apologize for the chapters being so short… Don't worry… they certainly won't all be this way.

Thank you again for taking the time to read my story.

**Chapter Two.**

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"Harry! Harry!"

Ginny cried out his name as he collapsed onto the kitchen floor of The Burrow. She knelt down and cradled his head in her lap.

"Ron! It's Harry. There's something wrong!"

Harry was gasping for breath and clutching his chest. He'd been close to death numerous times… Hell, he'd stared death in its face and lived to tell the tale. But this… this pain was completely unlike anything he had ever felt before. It was as though his body had decided to shut down... to give up.

Stress, he reasoned. Harry knew that stress could cause infinite amounts of damage to an individual's physical and mental health and what with the war looming on the horizon and Hermione's disappearance and probable kidnapping by Death Eaters last month; he figured he'd once again pushed himself to the very limits of what he was able to withstand.

A loud crash at the base of the stairs announced Ron's frantic entrance into the room. He took one glance at a panicked Ginny hunched over Harry, his face wrenched in pain, and immediately his wand was out as he began advancing towards the door in anticipation of another Death Eater attack.

"Where are they?", Ron demanded in hoarse whisper, tearing his worried eyes away from Harry's pained form and began scanning the yard through the kitchen window.

Ginny looked up at him blankly before realization dawned on her tear-stained face.

"No, Ron! It wasn't them! It was Harry… he just… just-".

Whatever she was attempting to say was interrupted by Harry's strained voice.

"Wait- I'm fi-", he began to say but stopped abruptly when a blinding flash of blue light forced him to close his eyes again. Through the glare, he swore he saw Hermione smiling at him and felt a familiar warmth… a feeling he had always associated with the only place that had ever felt like home. And for one fleeting moment he was transported back to the Gryffindor common room.

Voices, obscured by what he was sure was his own labored breathing, drew Harry back to the Burrow. He could just make out Ginny and Ron anxiously discussing whether or not he should be apparated to St. Mungo's He understood their apprehensions… it was uncertain who could be trusted during these trying times and they both felt that Harry was much safer away from the prying eyes and ears of the wizarding world.

With great effort, he attempted to control his breathing… as he did, the pain in his chest began to subside.

Taking notice of Harry's sudden stillness, the siblings stopped speaking and turned back to him. Ron involuntarily reached out for Harry's hand, his face a ghostly white.

"Harry…? Mate, wake up.", Ron pleaded.

He looked helplessly to Ginny and then back to Harry. Staring intently into Harry's face, Ron observed that he'd never seen his best friend look so serene… he found himself wishing that Harry never had to wake up, that he could forget about the world of responsibility upon his shoulders.

Unconsciously, his hand tightened around Harry's and he heard Ginny gasp.

"Oh thank goodness, Harry! Ron! He's waking up!"

Harry was stirring slightly, his head still held upon Ginny's lap as she cupped his face, searching his features for confirmation that he was alright. She noticed his mouth begin to move before she heard him speak.

"She's alive", Harry whispered unable to find his voice, "Hermione is alive".

Ginny glanced at Ron, her eyes a mixture of confusion and relief. All Ron could manage was a faint, "wha…?"

"Just relax, Harry. You're still weak… Mum will be home soon to help." soothed Ginny, trying to calm her brother simultaneously.

Harry smiled. He opened his eyes and simply smiled up at them both and repeated, "Hermione is alive… and she's at Hogwarts."

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**I await your reviews :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

I have the best reviewers in the history of ever.

**Chapter Three.**

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"Are you two blind?!" Harry gaped at Ron and Ginny, "How could you possibly _not_ have seen it?"

He stared in disbelief at his two friends standing in front of him. Growing frustrated at their identical bewildered expressions, Harry forced himself to remain calm. There was no sense in getting himself worked up and causing another… well, whatever that 'episode' was that had just taken place.

"Neither of you saw the blue light?" he asked again in a less threatening tone.

"There wasn't any light, Harry. I think you need to rest. You're getting upset about no-"

"It wasn't _nothing_, Ginny" Harry interrupted, "It was Hermione. She was trying to tell me something. I know it."

"Harry," Ron began cautiously, "Don't you think that if Hermione had just been hanging out in the Gryffindor tower all this time, she would have owled us ages ago? I mean… I'm just as worried about her as you are but it just doesn't sound like her."

Harry turned to Ron and opened his mouth, clearly ready to argue when Ginny jumped in instead.

"You've gotten yourself into such a state, Harry," she began, the gentle, nurturing tone her voice held before was gone. "You're trying to convince yourself that Hermione's safe because it's what you want to believe. We all do. Whatever just happened to you-" Ginny continued quickly when Harry made an attempt to interrupt her again, "It scared us to death, Harry. Just relax."

Harry sank into a chair at the Weasley's kitchen table. He knew she was right. They were both right. Hermione would never disappear without telling them where she was… especially now, when war was imminent. It felt so real though, he puzzled to himself.

Even more strange was that Hermione didn't look scared… she didn't appear to have been hurt for which he was thankful but there wasn't even a sense of urgency in her message.

The only thing that made him firmly believe that she was truly attempting to contact him was the expression on her face. That strange smile on Hermione's face… he'd seen it before.

Before he could contemplate the topic further, he could hear Ron addressing him.

"D'you _really_ think she's at Hogwarts, Harry?" Ron's eyes were scrutinizing him, expectantly.

"I…I think so." He replied, beginning to doubt himself when looking into Ron's trusting face. Could he really have imagined it? No, he decided, definitely not. "She is at Hogwarts." He stated confidently.

"It's settled then," Ginny said somewhat coolly, leaning against the counter, looking directly at Harry. "We'll head to Hogwarts first thing in the morning. We should probably travel by broom, as a portkey would be too easily traced. I'll alert McGonagall that we'll be coming." With that, she lifted her wand and without speaking a word, a burst of silver shot out of the end of her wand and through the open window.

Harry followed the silvery light with his gaze until it disappeared into the trees. McGonagall had taught them to send secured messages with their patronuses, a form of communication that was, until then, only known to members of the Order of the Phoenix… however, it still never failed to remind him of Dumbledore.

Harry rose from the table where he had been sitting. Ignoring the twinge of hunger he felt in his abdomen, he, instead, nodded to Ginny and Ron before turning out of the kitchen and heading upstairs for bed. He climbed the stairs slowly, he was drained.

If only Dumbledore were here, he thought… he'd have known how to find Hermione, he'd be helping him search for the remaining horcruxes, he… well, there was no sense in dwelling on it. Dumbledore was dead and the weight of the world fell upon Harry's shoulders. He alone held the fate of the wizarding world in the palm of his hand.

True to his word, Harry had not returned to Hogwarts for his seventh year, neither had Ron or Hermione. It pained him not to go back to the castle he felt such strong ties with but he knew there was no way he could go back to school and ignore the task set before him.

He opened Ron's bedroom door and walked across to the spare bed where he would be sleeping. Sitting down, he removed his glasses and rubbed his weary eyes.

He crawled into the bed, allowing his muscles to relax as he slid under the cool blankets. He waited for fatigue to take over but, instead, his mind began to wander again. No matter how tired he was, he could never turn off the constant contemplation in his head.

Ron and Hermione were the only ones who understood, he confirmed to himself… they kept him sane, or as sane as he could possibly be after all he'd been through, he thought darkly. In the months since Dumbledore's funeral, the three of them had been researching dark magic, creating a timeline of Voldemort's attacks and compiling a list of all the possible remaining horcruxes.

But then Hermione had disappeared and everything changed. She was the heart of the trio, not to mention the brains, and everything seemed so much more difficult without her. Her persistence had always compelled them to work harder… and without it, they had struggled to make any new discoveries at all.

Ginny had somehow sensed this and had shown up at Grimmauld Place one evening, two weeks ago, her trunk in tow. She had given Harry and Ron a knowing look, daring them to argue with her, at once they knew that she would be with them from then on. They'd filled her in on what they knew thus far and were shocked that Ginny was able to make some very revealing connections that they had overlooked. Though they both felt extremely protective of her, knowing that she would be in extreme danger with them, they also knew there was not a chance she'd ever leave their sides as long as there was a war to be won.

They were, quite frankly, shocked that Mrs. Weasley had allowed either of her children to leave school to join Harry, but she had. In fact, she'd seemed almost… proud, Harry remembered fondly. Ginny, seeing as she was underage, was only permitted to leave Hogwarts on the condition that she completed coursework set forth by the newly named Headmistress McGonagall.

Ginny… that was treacherous territory, he thought as he smiled sadly in the dark. As much as he didn't like to let his mind wander to the subject of Ginny, still, he often did think of her. He swore silently to himself for the thousandth time, that if he made it out of this war alive, he would marry her and never give himself the chance to let her get away again.

The door opened just then and he heard Ron come in and climb into bed across the room. For a while they both laid in silent contemplation then Ron's voice broke through the stillness.

"I hope Hermione's at Hogwarts," he said partly just to himself, "I hope you're right, mate."

Harry didn't answer. This was the first lead they'd had towards finding Hermione… and it was a vision Harry had seen when he'd collapsed in the kitchen. It sounded ridiculous when he thought of it that way… but still, he kept envisioning the smile that had been on Hermione's face. It was the last thing on his mind as he faded off to sleep.

* * *

After James had disappeared into his dormitory Hermione sat up late into the night, curled up in her favorite armchair in the Gryffindor common room, watching as the fire slowly burned down to glowing embers.

She had really tried not to care about James. Distancing herself from he and his friends as much as possible, she usually kept to herself… which was difficult considering that everyone in school wanted to meet the "new girl". The Marauders, though, proved hard to avoid and they were as curious as they were charming.

She found Remus the easiest to accept, as she knew him and greatly respected him in the future. The two of them had shared a few nice chats about Arithmancy and Ancient Runes during meals, he was so intelligent and very easy to like. Sirius was, not only, extraordinarily handsome but extremely warm and genuine. In spite of this, Hermione hadn't really let herself warm up to him… The youthful twinkle in his eyes was unsettling… such a stark contrast to the haunted appearance they would take on years later. He had become aware of her reserved approach to him, she knew, and seemed to go out of his way to wink and smile at her when he'd catch her eye. But then there was Peter. She'd not yet said a word to him. She couldn't bring herself to so much as look him in the eye as his betrayal was unforgivable for Hermione, regardless of whether or not he'd committed it yet.

The other seventh year Gryffindor girls were friendly, but being friendly with them meant being friendly with Lily and Hermione felt overwhelming guilt whenever she was faced with the Head Girl. This was Harry's mom… and every time her eyes met Hermione's, it was as though Harry was staring back at her. But Hermione was always pleasant to Lily, who took the time to show her around the school believing she was a transfer student and introduced her to all of her friends, which was practically the entire student body. Lily did not spend a lot of time with James, Sirius, Remus and Peter… she was actually just beginning to warm up to James after years of turbulent yet moderate friendship, but when she was around him, it was plain to all that she just lit up… she smiled a bit wider, laughed a little louder. If Hermione wasn't biased, she might admit that it really was very endearing seeing the two of them together.

Hermione knew the implications of her feelings for James… aware of how much she could actually change the future; she'd vowed to stay away from him. No one would ever notice that she watched him a bit more often than was appropriate…but then, he'd often watched her too, hadn't he?

He had… she'd seen him. Out of the corner of her eye she'd noticed his eyes following her as she walked through the Great Hall or passing him in a corridor… a thrill would pass over her body, followed immediately by a surge of remorse which would have her rushing straight off to the library to research another book on time travel that she would stare at while day-dreaming about James.

Pathetic… and so unlike her. She wasn't the type of girl to lose her sense of self whenever she fancied a boy. In fact, she'd never been the type who fancied a different boy every week… not like Lavender or Parvati. Of course, she'd entertained a few crushes; Gilderoy Lockhart, Viktor Krum, she had even allowed herself a childish fascination with Sirius for some time, she laughed aloud… but they never compared to Harry… nor James now. But James, she thought ruefully, was meant to be with Lily. And Harry was meant to be with Ginny.

Only once had she ever defied her self-restraint, thrown caution to the wind and acted upon her emotions. But she didn't like to think about that night…

Pushing the thought out of her mind, Hermione got up from the armchair and stretched her arms out with a great yawn. Gathering her books, she took one last look up at the boy's dormitory and trudged up the stairs to her own.

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	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

As always, thank you to those of you who've taken the time to review… it means so much to hear your thoughts, theories and encouragement!

Also, just to avoid confusion here, this is all happening simultaneously to Harry and Hermione. Twenty-two years apart but the same day, same time… make sense?

Later on, the _italics_ _are Hermione's_ memories and the other part is Harry's… you'll see what I mean!

**Chapter Four.**

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The next morning, Hermione awoke at day break. This was her typical schedule… she always tried to bathe, dress and go down for breakfast before the other girls woke up. It helped her to avoid being forced into any uncomfortable social situations. It was a self-preservation thing... or so she liked to believe.

This morning, however, as she briskly walked through the common room towards the portrait hole, she came to a standstill when she noticed that she wasn't the first Gryffindor to rise at such an early hour. From where she had stopped, she could see that someone was sitting in her favorite arm chair, more importantly, she could see the messy, dark hair of said person sticking out over the top of the chair. She felt her pulse begin to quicken, frantically trying to remember what she was doing in the common room in the first place.

Breakfast!.. She recalled thankfully. Turning back towards the portrait hole, she began to exit at such a fast pace she quite possibly could have been sprinting. Unfortunately, Hermione was in such a hurry to escape the room unnoticed, she'd forgotten to pay very close attention to where she was going. The tip of her shoe caught the leg of one of the study desks, her momentum still pushing her forward, and before she could stop herself she fell, hard, banging her elbow on the desk with a loud thud on the way down.

Hermione gasped in pain, clutching her elbow. Her entire arm felt numb, making it difficult to get up from the floor in her tangle of robes and limbs. A hand appeared in front of her face, unwilling to make more of a fool out of herself, she took it and was gratefully helped to her feet.

"That fall sounded something awful. Are you alright?"

Slowly, she raised her eyes from her newly scuffed shoes to look directly at James, his eyes full of concern glancing from her elbow to her face. She clutched her injured arm protectively and felt herself flush, positive that she strongly resembled a radish. He'd asked her a question, she realized, rapidly nodding in response before she pretended to be very busy straightening her robes.

"Let me check your arm," James said as he reached out and touched the hand she had clasped around her throbbing elbow, "You may need to visit the hospital wing."

Hermione forced a smile, "No, no. It's nothing!" Her words, though, were betrayed by the bolt of pain that seared through her arm causing her to wince.

James gave her a stern look that resembled McGonagall rather accurately before placing his hand on her shoulder and leading her towards the portrait hole, not needing to say anything.

The corridors were still deserted at this early hour as they walked in silence towards the hospital wing. The calm was broken though when Hermione spoke suddenly as she realized something, "You must have been up waiting for Lily! How silly of me… you go back. I'll be fine from here."

James stopped in his tracks and looked at her as though she'd grown a second head. "What are you talking about, Hermione?" He spoke softly.

"Well, I just thought… you're not usually up this early, I figured you were waiting for-"

"You," he said plainly as though it were the most obvious thing in the world, "I was waiting for you." With that, he turned and continued down the corridor, his hand grazing hers as he moved.

Hermione stood frozen on the spot for a moment, the warmth in her hand now temporarily overriding the pain in her arm. She restrained the grin that threatened to break out across her face and held back the questions that yearned to be asked, she took a deep breath and hurried after him.

* * *

It was well past noon when a travel-weary Harry, Ron and Ginny arrived in Hogsmeade. The cloudy October day combined with the Disillusionment Charm they'd performed had made them virtually invisible during their flight, however uncomfortable. They were all extremely hungry and decided on a quick meal at the Three Broomsticks before heading up to the castle. 

Once inside the nearly empty pub, they took a table near the door. Harry and Ron grimaced as they eased into their seats.

Ginny smirked at them, "A little tender from the trip, eh boys?"

This comment earned her a glare from Ron and a slight blush from Harry. She was right though… if Harry had it his way, he wouldn't be sitting on a broomstick for quite some time.

Ron spotted Madam Rosmerta emerging from the back room and stood abruptly. "I'll just go and… er… order us drinks," he said distractedly as he headed towards the bar.

Harry and Ginny could just make out the pleasant voice of the barmaid who was greeting him with a pleasant, "Hello Handsome!"

As soon as he was out of earshot, they erupted in laughter. Ron and his very juvenile crush on Rosmerta never lost its absurdity. As their laughs died down, an uncomfortable silence settled over the two of them. Ginny looked down, apparently fascinated with the napkin resting in her lap… Harry observed her. Merlin, she was pretty. He was about to tell her how beautiful he really thought she was, but he stopped himself before he'd said a word. She'd only just begun to speak to him again, after… what had happened. And anyways, he and Ron needed her help… upsetting her now would be very detrimental to their mission. Not to mention, he really hated it when she was upset at him… her Weasley temper could give her mother a run for her money.

They sat there, not speaking, until Ron came back, sinking into his seat across from Harry. A far away look upon his face as he set three butterbeers on the table and sighed, "She called me handsome."

Ginny's laughter at this was quickly covered up by a feigned coughing fit. Harry didn't have the heart to tell him that Rosmerta called all of her male bar patrons "Handsome"… Ron looked far too pleased at that moment.

Nearly an hour later, the three of them emerged from the Three Broomsticks feeling rejuvenated. They began walking towards Hogwarts, none of them saying a word but all of their thoughts were on Hermione.

* * *

Hermione collapsed into her favorite velvety, red armchair. She had spent the better part of the morning in the infirmary being fussed over by a very young Madam Pomfrey. James had brought up breakfast for her from the Great Hall, two slices of toast with orange marmalade and a cup of tea with a splash of milk. "I remembered this is what you have every morning," he had said, justifying himself at her questioning look. He'd left for class a short time later, promising to look in on her after and, at her insistence, to get her assignments so she wouldn't fall behind. 

After performing a few spells to neutralize the pain, Madam Pomfrey had given her a potion to drink, "for the sprain in your elbow", and a strict order to not use her injured arm for two days.

Her arm now in a sling, Hermione allowed the warmth of the common room fire to sooth her aching muscles. She was just starting to doze off when she heard voices indicating that a group of people had just returned from lunch. Not just any group of people either, it was the Marauders. There was no point in trying to rest now, she thought to herself as she sat up a little straighter.

Remus approached her first, looking concerned, "We heard you had an accident," he said eyeing her sling, "How are you feeling?"

She smiled at him, had he always been so serious? "Thank you, Remus. I'm just fine. The sling is more to remind me not to use this arm than anything else."

"Did you hear that, mates? She's faking." Sirius announced, making himself comfortable on the armrest of Hermione's chair. "Trying to get me to carry your books to class for you, eh?" He winked at her.

Peter and James had joined them right then and Hermione was the only one who noticed James give Sirius a very strange look… if she didn't know better, she may have thought it was resentment or jealousy, even. But, luckily for her, she did know better.

"I appreciate your concern," she began and looking to James, she added, "And all of your help. Madam Pomfrey recommends I get some rest."

"We'll leave you to rest then," said James, looking pointedly at Remus and Sirius.

Sirius rose from the armrest and with a mischievous smile, he placed a quick kiss on the back of Hermione's hand before winking at her once more and taking off up the stairs.

Remus rolled his eyes, used to these nauseating displays from Sirius, he smiled courteously at her and followed his friend.

Only James remained… Hermione smiled up at him. Before she could thank him again for coming to her aid that morning, he bent over and grazed her cheek with his lips. He stood up, his expression a mixture of confusion and delight and without a word, he too retreated from the room.

Hermione watched him go, he didn't follow his friends upstairs but rather gathered his books again and left through the portrait hole. Just as the portrait was swinging shut, she saw him touch a hand to his mouth and smile.

She sank back down in the armchair, involuntarily touching the spot on her cheek that James' lips had come in contact with. Hermione hadn't had many kisses. She'd had a few with Viktor back in her fourth year but he lacked a certain precision, so to speak… she was no expert but he just didn't excite her in that way.

She'd shared a brief, chaste kiss with Sirius under the mistletoe during Christmas at Grimmauld Place her fifth year. That had been nearly two years earlier and the butterflies still had not subsided… childhood adoration never entirely disappeared, she reasoned.

And then there was the most recent kiss. How could she have been so reckless, she asked herself again and again? She'd instantly regretted it… as she knew full well she would. They'd never discussed it but she had often wondered if Harry ever thought about that night

* * *

Harry heaved a great sigh as he entered the Gryffindor common room. 'Home,' He thought peacefully. 

The three of them had been offered private rooms to stay in while they were at Hogwarts but Harry had asked if he could visit the Gryffindor Tower for a bit… it was just after lunch and all the students were in class and the only sound came from the crackling fire.

Despite the gravity of the situation they were currently in, he couldn't help but smile at the memories this room evoked. Some of the best times in his life had taken place in this very spot; celebrating Quidditch victories, losing fantastically to Ron at wizard's chess, his first kiss with Ginny, he remembered fondly.

Harry neared the fireplace and stopped within inches of a large, cushy armchair… Hermione's favorite. He could almost see her mane of bushy hair peeking out around the edge, wishing she would simply appear there.

His vision of Hermione had led him here… but why? He sank into the armchair, his brow furrowed in concentration… but he couldn't seem to focus. For some reason his thoughts were drawn to a different memory of Hermione.

And then he remembered where he'd seen that smile before!

At Bill and Fleur's wedding just four months earlier.

He thought about that night often but had apparently overlooked this particular detail…

He had known that Hermione had feelings for him, a crush… But as it had never interfered with their friendship, Harry never felt that the subject needed to be addressed.

_She walked into the reception… searching the room for Harry. Spotting him across the room, she made her way over to him, weaving through the tables. When she reached him, she immediately identified what he was staring at. Following his gaze to the dance floor…Naturally, she thought._

He was watching Ginny dance with her father; she was beaming and laughing with Arthur as she stepped on his toes yet again. He'd done the right thing, Harry repeated to himself. Ending his relationship with Ginny would keep her out of harm's way but he still loved her as much as ever, maybe more.

He had been so taken with the lovely red-head on the dance floor that he hadn't even noticed Hermione sitting down beside him.

_He looked pained. She hated seeing him this way… breaking up with Ginny was easily the hardest thing he'd ever had to do, which was saying quite a lot considering. _

_Desperately wanting to take him away from his anguish, she reached for his hand and without a word, led him outside._

He blindly followed Hermione out into a small courtyard, there was a fountain and ivy growing abundantly over the stone walls.

"I thought you could use some air," offered Hermione when he gave her a blank look.

"Ah… yes, I suppose I…" but he didn't have anything to add. Sadness began to flood over him as his thoughts trailed back to Ginny and how he wished he'd been the one making her smile so brightly.

He felt Hermione take a step towards him and put her hand on his cheek.

"You did the right thing, Harry, but you can't dwell on the past. Not when there is so much ahead of you right now."

She took another slow step forward placing her other hand on his chest.

_Her hand lingered for a moment… she'd never allowed herself to remain in such close proximity to Harry for so long for fear of exactly this. The hand on his chest seemed to have a mind of it's own as it began to travel ever so slowly over his muscles feeling the warmth of his skin through his crisp white dress shirt. _

Harry looked down at her hand, not really sure exactly what was happening. He should stop her but it felt good to be touched this way… he missed it so much. And though he knew it was Hermione there with him, he closed his eyes and pictured Ginny's face, the way her golden brown eyes would darken with desire during their more intimate moments.

_Tearing her gaze away from his chest, Hermione looked up at her friend and took another step closer to him. Their bodies were now flush up against one another. She'd completely thrown caution to the wind… not thinking what this would look like if someone were to find them in this compromising position. _

_She allowed her hand that had been resting on his jaw to trace its way around the back of his neck. Her other hand moving leisurely up his shoulder, her face tilted back just enough to study his features… brow creased in thought, slightly biting his bottom lip, his bright green eyes hidden under closed lids._

_He shivered slightly and Hermione smirked when she felt Harry's body react to her touch._

Harry felt her hands moving over his collarbone and felt a slight jolt travel through him… Ginny used to touch him there. Because she had known the effect it had on him. And the effect it was definitely having on him at that very moment.

He opened his eyes and looked down into her face, half surprised not to find Ginny standing before him. Suddenly very aware of the non-existent space between them Harry opened his mouth to excuse himself when the look on Hermione's face stopped him. A shy, tentative smile crept across her face. Most unusual for Hermione… she looked so vulnerable.

_For a moment she had thought he was going to leave… not knowing what to say she merely smiled at him. _

_He hadn't gone! She was elated. Maybe, just maybe…allowing herself to hope…_

_Leaning into him and standing up onto her toes to make up for their difference in height, Hermione's eyes dropped to his lips. His mouth slightly parted as though he were about to speak, she moved closer, her mouth mere inches from his. _

Instinctively, Harry's hands that had been resting at his sides moved to Hermione's hips. His conscience was screaming at him to stop… This wasn't Ginny. But he told himself that he didn't know better… he'd had one too many butterbeers… the moonlight could be very deceiving… his inner-turmoil continued though he knew full well he just craved the closeness. It felt too good and before he knew what he was doing his head dipped and closed the few inches between his mouth and Hermione's.

_He'd kissed her… he was still kissing her! 'Stop thinking and kiss him back, you fool!' she shouted to herself. Allowing both of her arms to wrap around Harry's neck she kissed him back fervently. Just as she was beginning to adjust to the feeling of his mouth on hers, he broke away. _

_Harry took a few steps back and turned towards the door that led into the reception hall. It quickly dawned on Hermione why Harry had pulled away. He had heard what she had been too distracted to notice… the choked back sobs of Ginny Weasley. She stood in the doorway, her eyes shining with tears, confusion and anger._

Harry couldn't understand what had just happened… he'd half convinced himself that it was Ginny he'd been kissing but when he saw her across the small courtyard he knew the gravity of what he had done. She stood completely still, crying, and staring directly into his eyes conveying all the hurt and anger she was feeling.

"Gin! This isn't what it-" he rushed to explain, but before he could get out a full sentence she'd turned and run back inside.

_Without so much as a glance back at her, Harry ran inside after Ginny, calling her name. The elation she'd been feeling only moments before rushed out of her and she felt cold. _

_She sat down hard on a stone bench and looked up to the sky. One star shone brighter than all the others. Sirius… The Dog Star. A solitary tear rolled down her cheek and she laughed coldly. Astronomy at a time like this? Perfect marks in every class…the brightest witch of her age… and she couldn't get it through to herself that Harry would never love her._

* * *

Harry sat up in the crimson chair in shock… He had gone back inside…how could he be remembering what had happened in the courtyard after he'd gone back inside? It wasn't possible. First flashes of blue light and visions… now this!? 

Maybe Ron would be able to convince Harry that he wasn't going mad, he thought hopefully. He leapt out of the chair and rushed off to find him.

* * *

Hermione jolted… "that was odd", she said aloud. A current of cold air flushed her body, as though someone had pulled a blanket off of her. She tried to comprehend what had happened… as strange as it sounded, for the briefest moment it had felt as though she'd been sitting in front of the fire... with Harry.

* * *

**Theories? Comments? Review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

Thank you to those of you who have taken the time to review... it means the world to me... really!

**A/N:** Once again, the _italics are Hermione's memories_.

**Chapter Five.**

* * *

It was James rather than Sirius who ended up carrying Hermione's books down to breakfast in the Great Hall the following morning. He had woken early again to meet her in the common room, questioning her about the state of her elbow the entire way.

"It's a simple sprain," Hermione had responded slowly to ensure he grasped the concept, "I assure you, I'm perfectly healthy."

She waited until he turned his head away, apparently satisfied with that response, before she rolled her eyes at his determined questioning, a smile tracing its way across her face. As much as her independent side didn't want to admit it, his rapt attention excited her.

They all now found themselves in History of Magic… Hermione was eagerly taking notes, which was proving to be difficult as she was forced to write with the wrong hand, while James and Sirius were leaning across their desks whispering to one another, no doubt plotting their next adventure, blissfully unaware of anything Professor Binns was saying. Peter's eyes had long since glazed over, his head resting on one hand, he appeared to be drooling onto his parchment, even Remus, the model student, looked as if he were day-dreaming as he was staring out the window at nothing in particular.

"Moony! Psst… Moony! Wormtail!" James whispered rather loudly, leaning across Hermione towards Remus and Peter.

"James, you are practically laying across the desk," Hermione growled through gritted teeth, trying with great difficulty to suppress her pleasure at his suddenly intimate proximity.

He grinned at her, leaning further over the table to talk to the other two boys. Heavens, he smelled good! Whatever it was he had told them had caused Peter to break into a fit of high pitched giggles while Remus smirked and shook his head, leading Hermione to believe they were planning something she wanted absolutely no part in… The responsible part of her could not comprehend how James had ever been named Head Boy. Every other part of her, however, believed no one else was even close to deserving the title.

Her thoughts lingered on him as she began surveying his broad shoulders, her eyes trailed down his arms, even through his robes she could see where his muscles were flexed as he leaned on his arms upon the desk, her eyes dropped lower still and settled on his hands… they looked strong and firm, not too soft yet not too coarse, perfect for Quidditch or building things or touching… her… in places no one else had ever-

"The Goblin Rebellion of 1612 began when…" the voice of Professor Binns startled her out of her trance.

Abruptly, Hermione realized she had been staring at him, her face began to feel very hot, she had no idea for how long she'd been staring but her brain urged her to look away… look anywhere else, just not at James.

She quickly craned her neck to look over James' back, as he was still speaking to Remus, and focused her attention back to the ever-oblivious Professor Binns. She nervously wondered if anyone had caught her staring so blatantly at James. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw someone looking at her… turning her head she realized it was Lily, those green eyes were unmistakable. Hermione offered a smile but for the first time, Lily failed to return the gesture. Her intense gaze shifted just past Hermione and straight at the back of James' head, she looked crestfallen.

When the bell rang signaling the end of class, Lily gathered up her things and with her head down, exited the room quickly. Hermione sat for a moment to collect her thoughts. Was Lily jealous… of her? True, James _had_ been paying her more attention the past couple of days, Hermione smiled to herself at this thought, but she was positive it was only because she was injured… although, he had said that he had been waiting for her in the common room the previous morning… maybe he was teasing, she rationalized. The thought of Lily Evans being jealous of Hermione Granger was just laughable.

"Look, Granger, James is already carrying your books for you, do you really expect him to cart _you_ around as well?"

She looked up to see Sirius beside her, the trademark sparkle in his eyes, and just past him she saw James waiting in the doorway.

"We'll be late for Potions if you don't get a move on," James said with a playful grin.

Hermione saw that James had gathered her books for her already. Smiling, she jumped up and followed him out of the classroom, Sirius walking behind her.

Just before they entered the Potions classroom, Sirius held Hermione back.

"Any idea what's got Evans' goat today?" He asked her, though the meaningful glint in his eye told her he knew exactly what Lily was upset about.

Hermione looked down at her feet and shook her head. "I don't know, Sirius," she answered in what she hoped was an innocent voice. Avoiding his eye contact, she ducked into the classroom.

* * *

Harry, Ron and Ginny were eating a late breakfast in Ginny's private room at Hogwarts. Their trip the day before had worn them all out and caused them to sleep in much later than usual. 

Harry had already explained to Ron exactly what had happened in the common room the day before, all about the unusual memories he was having about what had taken place at Bill and Fleur's wedding. For obvious reasons, he'd hesitated to tell Ginny about it but he thought, and Ron had agreed, that if she truly wanted to help them, then she really ought to know everything.

"Er… Gin… um… Ginny?" Off to a great start already, he thought sarcastically to himself.

She glanced up from the slice of toast she was buttering, acknowledging that she'd heard him.

With a furtive glance to Ron, who nodded encouragingly, he spoke again.

"You… you remember your brother's wedding… in the summer?"

Ginny stopped buttering her toast and gave Harry a reproachful look conveying that she understood precisely what he was getting at.

"Of course, I remember, Harry," She answered curtly.

"Right. Of course," Harry felt himself flush… the collar of his shirt felt as though it was choking him. He cleared his throat and pushed on. "So, you remember when you… er… I mean… Hermione and I, we were… umm…"

"For goodness sake, Harry! Grow up." Ginny spat at him. "I interrupted you snogging Hermione. Right. What of it?"

Ron looked at Harry apologetically but didn't offer any help… this was one conversation he did not want to get involved in.

Harry looked at her and saw that through her cold glare she was fighting back tears. He moved to sit beside her on the love seat and she turned her face away.

"Gin?" He touched a hand to her face. She jerked away from him as tears spilled silently onto her cheeks, "Merlin, Ginny… please don't cry."

Ron stood, looking spectacularly uncomfortable, and jerked his head towards the door, indicating to Harry that he was going to give them some space. Harry nodded at him and turned back to the beautiful girl sitting beside him.

"I've told you before, Ginny, that it was a mistake… I missed you so much that I-"

She shook his hand off and pushed it away. "That you ran off to snog your best friend?" She shot back in a falsely strong voice.

Harry opened his mouth to explain himself again but was cut off once more by her soft, yet firm, voice.

"Don't, Harry… just stop…"

He did as he was told. Ginny had closed her eyes and was taking long, controlled breaths as if trying to calm herself, although her fists remained clenched in her lap. After what seemed to Harry like an eternity, she opened her eyes and looked at him. The emotion that had been burning behind her eyes was gone… in its place, a cold indifference that he found rather alarming. He would have gladly endured her screaming at him if he never had to see this look in her eyes again.

"I don't understand what _that_ night has to do with anything," Ginny began, speaking very slowly so he wouldn't miss a single word. "But as you've decided to bring it up, I can only assume that you _think_ you have a good reason for it."

"Gin-"

"No, Harry. My turn," She hissed at him. "You must be aware of the fact that this particular… _affair_, isn't a topic that is particularly endeared to me. Nor would it escape you that I would choose not to have it discussed in front of my brother."

"You're right, Ginny," Harry spoke quickly so she wouldn't cut him off again. But before he could explain further, she'd begun again.

"And since you have displayed such little tact and next to no respect for my feelings regarding said _affair_, I can once again, assume that you gave it very little thought before bringing it up to me over breakfast."

Harry was really beginning to dislike the way in which she emphasized the word 'affair'…and he got the distinct impression that she'd rehearsed that particular speech before.

He held his breath, waiting for her to continue, but she said no more. Her eyes remained cold and fixed on Harry.

Clearing his throat, he began tentatively, waiting for her to cut him off again. "Ginny, that night isn't something I enjoy thinking about either. I've gone so far as to consider 'Obliviating' the memory of that night… but I wouldn't want to because then I would forget how beautiful you looked out on that dance floor. I haven't seen you laugh since that night."

For the briefest moment, Harry thought he saw her icy exterior falter. But in an instant, it was back again.

"That is all very interesting, Harry. But would I be correct in assuming there is a point to all of this?"

Harry felt slightly disheartened that she hadn't responded any less indifferently. Perhaps, just getting to the objective would be best, he thought dejectedly. "The point is that I avoid thinking about what happened at the wedding… just like you. But last night, I did think about it."

Ginny raised her eyebrows at him. "So much thinking, Potter… I hope you didn't strain yourself," she said sarcastically.

"Well… I did think about that night." He continued, ignoring her snide remark. "But it was sort of felt like someone was using 'Legilimens' on me… the memory played out in my head against my will almost. And part of it, I could see from… er… from Hermione's perspective."

If Harry thought that Ginny's gaze couldn't be any colder, he was wrong. If looks could kill, he would've been stone dead in that instant. Terrified of what she might say if given the opportunity, Harry continued hurriedly.

"I think, and Ron agrees with me, that there is a connection between the vision I had of Hermione being here, at Hogwarts, and the memory I had yesterday. We just don't know what it means."

And then Ginny broke. The detached façade she had been trying so hard to maintain crumbled before Harry's eyes.

In one fluid motion, she rose from the couch and was at the door. She paused and turned to face him, tears once again streaming down her face. "Harry… don't you know how rare connections like that are? It means… that you love her."

In an instant, Ginny had gone from the room. Harry sat there alone and dumbfounded, having absolutely no idea what he'd said wrong.

* * *

After the comment Sirius had made outside Potions that morning, Hermione had paid closer attention to Lily's behavior… and to be completely honest, he was right. Something certainly had 'got Evans' goat', to put it crudely. 

The normally exuberant Lily Evans had been noticeably quiet all day. She had even moved from her usual seat at the very front of the Potions classroom to one near the back, much to the bewilderment of her usual Potions partner, best friend and fellow seventh year Gryffindor, Alice Bruneau, whom Hermione had concluded would one day be the mother of her friend, Neville Longbottom. Even Professor Slughorn's praise of Lily's Calming Draught didn't elicit more than a forced smile from her.

Herbology wasn't any different. Lily kept mostly to herself, speaking only to Alice and Professor Sprout when necessary. Hermione caught Lily's eye over her Fanged Geranium plant and was surprised to see sadness reflected back at her.

"Lily, umm… are you…"

"I'm fine, Hermione," Lily responded automatically. She had clearly been asked the same question many times today. Remembering her manners, she added, "Thank you for asking."

James chose that moment to rush over and ask Hermione if she had any idea how to remove Bubotuber Pus from the skin. When asked why, he responded quickly with, "No reason!" But the pained look on Peter's face across the room, betrayed his nonchalance. Hermione couldn't help but laugh, James looked so cute when he was worried. She began explaining to him that it was very simple to mix a Boil-Curing Potion, when they were interrupted by the sound of someone crying out in pain.

Lily had been watching the two of them so intently that she hadn't been paying any attention to her Fanged Geranium and it had bitten her… hard. She gripped her hand tightly, her face scrunched up. James looked concerned and began to walk towards her when Professor Sprout scrambled over, reaching out to inspect Lily's hand.

"This doesn't look too serious, dear. Would you like to visit the hospital wing?"

"No, thank you Professor," Lily answered quietly. She blushed furiously, obviously more concerned with the embarrassment at having been so careless while eavesdropping on James and Hermione, than the pain.

James, seeing that she was okay, looked at Lily with an amused expression, "You didn't lose any fingers, did you Evans?"

Lily glowered at him, "Sod off, Potter!" Then, tossing her great mane of shiny red hair over her shoulder, she stalked off toward the other end of the greenhouse.

After class, Hermione sank exhaustedly into a seat at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. This was one of the longest days in recent memory, she thought, and it was only lunchtime. She had settled herself a good distance away from everyone else, hoping for a bit of solitude. Resting her forehead on her arms and closing her eyes, Hermione thought about James and his recent 'interest' in her. She still knew how dangerous it was for her to harbor these feelings for him, but no one needed to know… and if no one found out, there was no harm done… or so she liked to tell herself.

As though they had sensed her desire to be alone… and completely ignored it, the four Marauders descended upon the table, surrounding her just as the large platters of food appeared between them. Not a word was spoken as the boys hastily began filling their plates. Hermione caught James' eye as he shoveled an overly large bite of steak and kidney pie into his mouth.

"Wha?" he asked with his mouth stuffed, reminding her instantly of Ron who always spoke with his mouth full.

A sentimental expression passed over her face. James managed to swallow his massive mouthful of food and leaned towards her concernedly.

"Is everything alright?"

Hermione didn't get the chance to answer, however, because Peter chose that moment to lean across the table towards them to get James' attention. He had a mirthful smirk upon his face as he leaned his small, pudgy body even closer to them.

"Prongsy! Look who just walked in!" Peter teased in a sing-song voice as he gestured towards a figure moving quickly past them down the table.

It was Lily. Without even a glance in their direction, she was heading as far away from them as she possibly could while still sitting with the Gryffindors, settling beside Alice and her boyfriend, Frank Longbottom. James straightened, as he had still been leaning towards Hermione, and craned his neck to get a better look at Lily.

Peter was still giggling though he was the only one, but he stopped when he realized no one else had found this even remotely amusing. Remus and Sirius had stopped mid-bite, Sirius' fork still halfway to his mouth as they both regarded James' reaction. He looked dismayed that he hadn't received so much as a glance from Lily and turned back to his food looking rather sullen. Sirius could see that Lily was clearly making a conscious effort _not_ to look at James and that Hermione was blushing slightly and looking down at her lap… she even looked a bit… guilty, he thought.

Remus leaned over to James and quietly asked, "Did you two have another row, Prongs? Or is she still angry at you from Herbology?"

James quickly covered up his gloomy expression and smiled up at Remus. "Like I know what goes through that woman's head!" He forced a laugh. But neither Remus nor Sirius were fooled… because they could see that despite James nonchalance, he kept stealing glances down the table to see if Lily was looking at him.

In an overly casual manner, James turned to Hermione who had not said a word since they'd sat down for dinner. With a valiant grin, he leaned into her a little closer than was necessary and said, "What's got your tongue, Miss Granger?" And he winked.

Hermione couldn't help but laugh at his shameless flirtation as the guilt that was plaguing her and all worries of Lily fluttered out of her mind.

Sirius did not miss this exchange. He watched James curiously, looking to Remus who was also watching with interest. Peter, who did not seem to have a clue what was going on, simply decided to continue with his dinner. But far down at the other end of the table, James' laugh, smile and wink did not go unnoticed. The Head Girl grabbed her books and left the Great Hall without a word or so much as touching her lunch.

The guilt that had dissipated at the mere suggestion of James' affection, flooded back when she saw Lily stalk out of the room and Hermione suddenly felt ill. She could feel Sirius' curious gaze upon her and she knew her remorseful air had not gone unnoticed. She pushed her plate away as she too stood up to leave. Mumbling something about, "the library," she hurried away ignoring their inquisitive stares.

Walking blindly through the halls of the castle, Hermione was completely immersed in her thoughts. She could navigate through Hogwarts blindfolded though, she knew it so well. She looked up to notice that she was in a familiar corridor… Edging further down the hallway she spotted a recognizable tapestry. Hermione slowly pulled it away from the wall to reveal the hidden corridor that she, Harry and Ron had often used to take shortcuts through the castle unnoticed.

With a vigilant glance up and down the hallway to be sure no one saw her, Hermione entered the passage and let the tapestry fall closed behind her. Once inside, she took a deep breath, enjoying the long awaited privacy. Of course, there wasn't anywhere in the castle she could go to hide from the Marauders with their trusty map but this would have to do.

She lit the end of her wand and she was suddenly absorbed in the memory of the last time she had entered this passageway.

* * *

Ginny bolted from the room. She didn't know where she was going but she knew she needed to get as far away from Harry Potter as she possibly could. Forcefully holding back her sobs, she ran down the corridor, not stopping even when she heard her name being called behind her. 

There were footsteps growing rapidly closer and she sped up… she did not want to speak to anyone. A hand clamped over her shoulder forcing her to stop and she turned around looking up into Ron's concerned face. The sight of her brother at that moment was all she needed to burst into another round of tears as she clung to him and buried her face in his chest.

"He loves her, Ron… he loves her." Ginny choked out through her tears.

Ron could barely make out what she was saying as her face was pressed into his robes and she was crying very hard. This was not Ron's area of expertise… he'd never had a knack for tactfulness and found himself rather at a loss for words but as Ginny so rarely cried, he knew it was serious.

Searching desperately for something to comfort his baby sister, he said, "Who loves who?"

"Him! Harry… he… he loves Hermione!" Ginny cried as she gripped his robes tighter in her fists.

Ron couldn't stifle his laughter. "Don't be daft, Ginny!" He said. "Everyone knows that Harry fancies you!"

"Don't patronize me, Ron! I'm not some silly child," Ginny said angrily, letting go of him as she turned on her heel and stalked down the corridor.

Ron turned to look at Harry who had been hovering a few feet behind him. "I'll talk to her, mate," He said with an encouraging smile to which Harry only shrugged helplessly.

A few minutes later, he finally caught up with his sister a few corridors away. "Ginny, wait up, would you?" Ron called to her.

She merely called over her shoulder, "I just want to be alone, Ron."

But Ginny paused in front of a familiar tapestry… she knew it concealed one of many passageways within the walls of Hogwarts as she had used it often after Harry and Ron had discovered it on the Marauder's Map during her second year. Without another thought, she lifted the edge of the fabric and disappeared behind it into the semi-darkness.

"Bad luck then… because I'm not leaving you alone until you listen to reason," Ron shot back, ducking behind the tapestry as well.

It was dark in the narrow veiled corridor and he almost ran full on into Ginny but managed to catch himself on the wall before he could completely lose his balance. She had stopped short and was staring directly in front of her, transfixed.

Ron pulled out his wand and muttered, "Lumos," under his breath and a misty light was cast upon the walls. Looking around, he got a strange feeling cast over him.

Ginny looked up at him, eyes wide and in a soft voice said, "Ron…?" He knew that she was experiencing the same odd sensation, both being taken over by their memories of months before… the last time they had ended up in this hidden corridor.

It had been near midnight, Ginny and Harry were in the common room working on some strategies for the upcoming match against Ravenclaw. Although, Ginny was finding it extremely difficult to concentrate as Harry had placed his hand on her knee and was rubbing his thumb back and forth over the fabric of her robes.

She giggled and grabbed his hand with her own. "If you keep up with that, we're not going to get anything done, Harry!" She said laughing.

Harry raised his eyebrows at her words indicating that he could think of a few things they could "get done".

She blushed and shook her head at him. "_You_ are incorrigible."

"Well, you're right about one thing. We aren't going to get anything more done here," Harry said, nodding at the parchments spread across the table, "Let's go for a walk."

"A walk?! It's midnight, Harry! We'll get into trouble."

"By whom? Ron and Hermione? They're they prefects on duty tonight… let's go." He insisted as he pulled her out of her chair.

She couldn't say no… it made her so completely happy to be with Harry that she never wanted to pass up the opportunity to spend time with him. After all, they had only been dating for a couple of weeks, these moments alone were few and far between.

She allowed him to drag her out of the portrait hole and through a maze of hallways.

_Ron and Hermione were quietly patrolling the sixth floor corridors as Ron emitted a loud yawn and looked at his watch._

"_C'mon Hermione! It's late…everyone is in bed. Can't we go back?" Ron begged_

"_No, Ronald. We are on duty until midnight, exactly. That gives us ten minutes, before we can go back." Hermione said with an exasperated tone. _

_They continued to wander aimlessly for another few moments. The silence was only marred by Ron's faint humming… a tune that sounded suspiciously like, "Weasley is Our King", Hermione thought with a smile._

Finally, after running nearly the length of the castle, or so it seemed to Ginny, Harry stopped and wrapped his arms around her waist. He beamed down at her before lifting her off her feet bringing her face just inches from his own.

"You have made me so happy, Ginny," Harry whispered, nuzzling his face into her neck.

Before Ginny could respond, he captured her mouth in a heated kiss. She kissed him back eagerly, letting him know without words how very happy he made her, as well.

She felt Harry moving backward, carrying her with him, as a heavy drape flapped behind her, they were immediately enveloped in velvety darkness and their passionate kiss grew deeper still. Ginny vaguely felt her feet touch the floor again but she remained clinging to him… never wanting this moment to end.

_Ron was right… this did seem to be rather pointless. But Dumbledore had been very explicit in his instructions that he'd wanted additional patrol hours from the prefects to increase security and she certainly was not one to argue with the Headmaster. _

_When it was two minutes until midnight, Hermione spoke again, "Ok, I think we're alright to head up to the tower now."_

_As tired as he was, Ron gave off a triumphant cheer and sped up turning down another hallway. He pointed towards a point on the wall not far off and Hermione knew he was indicating the passageway that would provide a shortcut back towards the Gryffindor tower. _

Their passionate fervor eased into leisurely, indulgent kisses… stopping every few moments to softly whisper shy words of affection and adoration. Harry's hands wandered freely from Ginny's face down her neck and ever so slowly inched down the front of her robes. She involuntarily sighed at the intimacy and tenderness of his touch. His hands lingered timidly and gradually slipped into the front of her robe to allow him better access to her body.

Ginny could feel his hands shaking slightly as they caressed the sensitive skin around her bra, it tickled her soft skin and she smiled to herself in the darkness. He felt incredible. With one strong arm holding her steady around her waist, he kissed her again, removing his other hand from her chest slowly and burying it in her long, silky hair cushioning her head as he pushed her back lightly against the stone wall. He ended the kiss and ran his thumb back and forth over her cheek, his eyes taking in every bit of her face that he could make out in the nearly pitch black space. Tilting his head slightly to touch his forehead to hers, they stood together enjoying the bewitching stillness.

_They reached the entrance to the hidden corridor and Ron threw the tapestry back, holding it open for Hermione. She walked in but stopped so abruptly that Ron collided with her back. _

"_Hey, what gives?" he asked, after being nearly knocked into the wall. _

_The tapestry was still hanging open just enough to allow a sliver of light to illuminate the passageway. And there in the half-light, were Harry and Ginny in, what appeared to be, a thoroughly intimate embrace. _

They pulled apart at once. Their friends had seen them kiss before, of course, but to catch them here in the middle of the nightwas somewhat more incriminating. Both Harry and Ginny looked to Ron… the last time he'd caught Ginny in a corridor with a boy he'd been furious… but now he simply looked annoyed though the corners of his mouth were twitching slightly indicating that he was trying to hide a smile.

Hermione, on the other hand, didn't appear angry or annoyed. In fact, to Ginny's awe, she looked completely devastated.

_Hermione felt like her heart had dropped into her stomach. She knew she'd walk in on a scene like this sooner or later, Hogwarts was only so big and they were her friends… it was only a matter of time. But the reality was so much worse than she had imagined it to be. It… hurt… there was no other word for it. Before they had broken apart from one another, they had looked so perfectly serene, and complete. _

"_Hermione?" Ginny asked softly, interrupting her thoughts. _

_She had to snap out of it… allowing her friends to see her upset would only lead to questions that she really didn't want to answer. She quickly submerged her heartache with the only thing she could think of… anger._

"_What are you two doing out of bed?!" She scolded them. "I should deduct house points for this!"_

Ginny was shocked… she couldn't comprehend what could possibly have been going on in Hermione's head at that moment. Hermione looked furious but on the verge of tears, as well.

"_Aww, c'mon Hermione. Give them a break. If anyone should be angry, it's me," Ron said throwing an arm around her, finally letting his smile break across his face. "And I think it's bloody hilarious."_

_Harry let out the breath he'd been holding and allowed himself to crack a smile too. _

_Hermione looked at the floor… 'I'm not angry… I'm broken,' she thought sadly as she looked back up at Harry. _

The penetrating stare which Hermione had focused on Harry, was very unsettling to Ginny. If she was going to be upset, it should be at both of them… but Hermione was clearly focused on Harry alone.

Ginny reached out for his hand… he was staring uncertainly back at Hermione and started slightly when he felt Ginny's touch.

_Hermione fixed her gaze upon their joined hands and sighed. "Very well. Why don't you both run along, then," she replied barely above a whisper. _

_She watched as Harry slipped his arm around Ginny's shoulders and led her further into the passageway back towards the entrance to the Gryffindor tower. As they disappeared into the darkness, Ron nudged her. _

"_We're well off duty now, aren't we? Let's go back too," he said already moving towards the other end of the passage. _

_Hermione felt empty… she wanted to sink to floor and let herself be consumed by the darkness. But she wouldn't…she would be strong. Hoping despite herself, that one day, Harry might change his mind. Her sensibilities told her otherwise, but she had to have something to hold on to. With that thought and the image of Harry and Ginny emblazoned in her mind, she turned to follow Ron._

* * *

Ginny and Ron looked at one another… astonished. Neither one knew what to say exactly. They both just stood there, faint shadows cast upon their faces from the light of Ron's wand. 

"That's what happened to Harry… right?" Ginny asked him, trying to make sense of what had happened.

"Yeah, I think so," Ron said, "I felt her. I felt, what she felt, you know?"

"Yeah. Me too." Then comprehension came over her in an instant and she added, "It was _her _then… not Harry."

"What about her?" Ron questioned with a furrowed brow.

"He doesn't love her… _She_ loves him." She looked anxiously at her brother.

Ron looked more confused than ever. Could Hermione have loved Harry? He knew that he wasn't very good at deciphering girls' feelings but surely he would have noticed if his best friend was in _love_ with his other best friend! But he knew what he had felt just now… Hermione had been deeply hurt to see Harry and Ginny together, of that he was certain.

"I don't know, Gin," He replied thoughtfully. "But we need to go tell Harry about this."

However, when they found Harry back in Ginny's room, he was slumped on the couch clutching his chest, his breathing labored.

"It happened again? The chest pain?" Ron questioned rushing over to him.

Harry just nodded. He looked at Ginny who remained standing in the doorway. Their eyes met and she simply mouthed to him, "I'm so sorry."

He couldn't seem to get his breathing under control to answer her, so he just nodded again, wondering what on Earth could be causing him this much pain.

* * *

Hermione looked around frantically holding her wand out in front of her to illuminate the walls around her. 

"Who's there?!" She demanded in a voice sounding much braver than she felt.

Her words were met only with silence though. There had been an unmistakable presence in that corridor, she was sure of it.

With a shake of her head to release the memory of Harry and Ginny that had been played over again in her mind, she quickly exited the passageway. Slightly disoriented by the light after standing in the dark for so long, it took a moment to remember where she was supposed to be going.

What was her next class?... Arithmancy, she remembered quickly. A look at her watch told her she was already five minutes late, she sighed and sped off towards the classroom and away from the memories that had been haunting her for months.

* * *

**Your reviews are much appreciated!**  



	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

Thank you again to my loyal reviewers... each and every one of you brighten my day. I mean that.

**Chapter Six.**

* * *

The next day began much the same as the previous one had. Hermione was up and dressed before any of her roommates and James was waiting for her in the common room. She had expected him to be there. After she left the Great Hall at lunch the day before, she'd successfully avoided him and the rest of the Marauders for the rest of the day… even though that had meant skipping dinner. Her stomach had not forgiven her for this and judging from the look on James' face… he hadn't either.

"Don't tell me she's gotten to you too?" James said with a slight edge to his usually casual voice as he stood to meet her.

"Excuse me?" Hermione replied blankly, halting on her way to the portrait hole.

"Evans." He stated, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "She's convinced you that I'm an awful git, not worthy of your time?"

She just stared back at him uncomprehendingly.

"That's why you kept away from me all day yesterday, right?" He continued warily.

Hermione just shook her head. The last thing she wanted to discuss with James… was Lily.

"No," She answered honestly. "She hasn't said a word to me. And truthfully, James, it wouldn't have made any difference to me if she had."

He visibly relaxed at her words and exhaled heavily.

"Then you're a right lot better than most of the girls around here. Most of them take Lily's word as law."

Hermione smiled faintly, "I am not most girls, James."

"That's obvious," he said, blushing slightly. "I'm sorry for assuming you be swayed by gossip. It's just that, Evans was pretty upset at me yesterday and… well, I guess I was worried what you'd think of me."

He cared what she thought of him? Hermione was astonished. He was the Head Boy… He was gorgeous… And he cared what she thought.

Her head was reeling. It wasn't much, admittedly so… but it was something… it was a start. Feeling suddenly brazen at this notion, Hermione moved closer to him, stopping with barely a foot between them.

"What I think, James, is that you are ten times the man Lily believes you to be." She said in a low voice.

Oh… this was wrong. She knew it was appalling to reveal her feelings for him this blatantly but seeing him so worried that she'd think less of him was too endearing to ignore.

He dropped his head and looked at the floor, apparently deep in thought before lifting his head to face her again. He opened his mouth to speak but stopped himself before he'd said anything. Instead, he lifted one hand and reached towards Hermione's face. She followed the movement with her eyes curiously. His fingers brushed past her cheek sending a shiver down her spine as he hesitantly touched her hair, pushing some of the loose curly tendrils away from her eyes, where they had fallen.

James' eyes were fixed on his hand lightly stroking her hair. Hermione was afraid to make a sound… scared that it might jog him back to his senses and this moment would have to end.

She tilted her face into his hand and closed her eyes, savoring the feeling of his touch.

"Oy, Prongs!"

From somewhere, far away, Hermione could hear a voice shouting.

"Prongs!"

The voice was more insistent now and it seemed to be getting closer. 'Go away!' Hermione urged silently. 'Please, go away!'

"James! You great prat."

That did it. James jerked away from Hermione and whirled around to reveal Sirius standing a mere five feet away looking perturbed.

"That woke you two up, did it?" He said flatly.

"Wha… what?" Replied a thoroughly flustered James.

Sirius smirked, "I've called your name about five times. What are you doing? Styling her hair, Prongs?"

James blushed furiously. "No, we were just talking." He said realizing how stupid it sounded as it was coming out of his mouth.

Sirius chuckled and addressed James in a mocking fashion. "Well, Mr. Potter. I've done my share of 'just talking' with the ladies and a word to the wise," he leaned in to whisper, "next time, choose a more discrete location to 'talk.'"

James didn't answer… he was still flushed and refused to meet Sirius' eyes.

Sirius headed towards the portrait hole, pausing briefly to look back at the blushing pair. Throwing a wink in Hermione's direction, he shook his head at his friend and laughed again before exiting the room.

Hermione couldn't help but notice that the laughter hadn't really reached his eyes nor could she ignore the fluttering sensation that had risen in her stomach when Sirius had winked at her. She legitimized it as embarrassment for being caught in such close proximity to James… of course, that had to be it.

"He… er… well… he might have a point there."

The sound of James' voice started Hermione out of her thoughts and she realized that she was still staring at the, now closed, portrait hole that Sirius had just passed through.

"I'm sorry?" She asked quickly, turning to him.

James flushed a deeper crimson than he already was and with great difficulty, continued. "He said we ought to… find a more – umm – discreet location to – er– _talk_?"

Hermione could hardly believe that she was hearing him correctly. Her heart started thumping more rapidly as she deliberated how to respond.

"Yes… he did… um… say that. Yes." She was sure her face was glowing red by now.

James seemed extremely uncomfortable as he fumbled for the right words, though, Hermione thought he looked outright adorable.

"Would you… like to… um… do that? I mean, I mean… talk… more discreetly?" He said.

Hermione's eyes bore into his, burning with questions and the need for reassurance that she wasn't mistaken about his intentions. She was sure, though, that she wasn't misreading him. If there ever was a chance to get closer to James Potter, this was it.

"I'd like that," she offered matter of factly.

* * *

Harry awoke with a start. He bolted upright and jerked his head around trying to figure out where he was. Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he recognized the Hogwarts hospital wing around him and then the memories of what had happened came rushing back. 

He remembered the chest pains and feeling extremely weak... Ron and Ginny had found him. They then had supported him all the way here where Madam Pomfrey had administered a dreamless sleep potion, against his will.

"Ah, you're awake, Mister Potter. And how are you feeling this morning?" Madam Pomfrey had come bustling into the room carrying a large vial of dark green liquid which had fumes emanating from the top.

Crossing his fingers that the foul looking potion wasn't intended for him, Harry spoke up trying to sound better than he felt.

"Fine! Just Fine. Guess I just needed a good rest."

And judging from the intense sunlight flooding the room indicating that it was likely an entire day had passed, he had certainly had a great deal of rest, indeed.

Madam Pomfrey scrutinized him suspiciously through narrowed eyes. She'd had him as a patient far too many times to see through his attempt at displaying perfect health, he knew.

"Let's see shall we?" She said, approaching his bed. "Stand up, please."

Harry slipped out from under the covers and stood at the side of the bed. But the second his feet hit the floor, his knees seemed to give out and he began to fall. He managed to catch himself on the bedside table before collapsing completely onto the floor and was helped back into bed by Madam Pomfrey, who was visibly concerned but not at all surprised by this.

"Tsk, Tsk," She scolded. "You haven't the energy to support yourself. Over-exertion, I expect. Bedrest for the remainder of the day. Drink this."

She shoved the vial of rank green potion into his hand and stood over him to make certain that he drank it all. It smelled worse than it looked and tasted even poorer than that… but Harry forced all of the potion down to appease Madam Pomfrey.

Handing her the empty vial, Harry lay back on his pillow and stared at the ceiling while contemplating what could have caused this.

The chest pain had been nearly the same as it was when he'd experienced it at the Burrow with a few exceptions. The last time this had happened, he had seen a blue flash of light and then Hermione had appeared… he thought at the time that the incidents had been related. The pain had caused the vision or vice versa. But this incident hadn't resulted in a vision or a flash of light of any color… though it had drained him wholly of his energy. As uncomfortable as the episode at the Burrow had been, he hadn't lost his ability to stand on his own, and here he was a full day later still unable to support himself.

Absentmindedly, Harry reached up and ran his fingers over his defining scar. Common sense told him that he should suspect Voldemort as the likely culprit behind all this. After all, it was widely speculated by the Order members that Hermione had been abducted by Death Eaters and wouldn't it be just like Voldemort to use someone Harry cared about to get to him? He thought bitterly, Sirius' image coming to the forefront of his overcrowded mind.

Like so many times before, Harry found his head throbbing from all the thoughts and worries swimming around inside of it. A pensieve would do him good right now.

A loud bang across the room caught Harry's attention and he turned his head to see the hospital wing door closing behind Ron who strode through the ward towards him looking anxious.

"Alright Harry?" Ron asked worriedly. "You gave us quite a fright, mate!"

Harry smiled weakly. "I'll live. I just haven't any energy. Need some rest, I suppose."

"I believe it. You didn't look too well when we found you." Ron appeared to be stalling, Harry thought.

He was about to ask Ron if there was a problem but before he could, Ron continued, "The same thing happened to us, Harry. We were in that hidden corridor on the sixth floor and it was… we remembered when Hermione and I found you and Gin… er… you know."

Harry's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Wha-at?" He dared not believe it was possible. "You understand then? About Hermione-"

"-Yeah!" Ron interrupted. "Same with Ginny. We felt Hermione's… feelings and Gin thinks she lov…" he trailed off.

"What?" Harry asked eagerly, urging Ron to finish his sentence.

"Nevermind." Ron said quickly. "It's just… it was so weird. Like Hermione was there. She was hurting, Harry."

"Yeah, I know." Said Harry quietly. "I knew."

They sat in silence for a few moments. Harry knew that Hermione had been hurting that night… he could see it in her eyes. She had played the role of supportive friend as well as any, but Harry knew it was an act. He'd just figured, or hoped anyway, that she would eventually move on. The night of the wedding, he'd realized that wasn't the case.

There were a million questions he was burning to ask Ron and Ginny about what they had experienced.

"Where _is_ Ginny?" Harry inquired, peering around Ron. He was a bit surprised she hadn't come with Ron to see him.

Ron looked down at his feet and shrugged.

"She's pretty distraught about everything. She stayed here with you all night until Pomfrey made her go to bed."

"Ginny was here?" Harry asked tentatively, not wanting to get his hopes up. The argument from the previous day hadn't escaped him entirely.

"Yeah, mate. She kept saying she'd never forgive herself if she didn't get to apologize to you properly." Ron explained looking a bit uncomfortable at the implication that they believed Harry might not make it through the night.

Harry watched his friend for a moment before chancing a grin. "It was my fault anyway. You know I'm completely stupid when it comes to girls," he joked attempting to lighten the mood.

Ron looked at Harry and in an instant both boys broke out into relieved laughter… all the anxiety and stress of the past few days melted away as the two friends succumbed to the alleviating laughter.

A perturbed sniff from behind Ron, halted their merriment, as they noticed Madam Pomfrey glowering at them.

"Mister Weasley! Can you not see that Mister Potter needs his rest?! I've already had to threaten your sister with a sleeping draught just to keep her away. Don't make me do the same to you."

Ron blushed. "Right… er… sorry." He stood and clapped Harry on the shoulder. "I'll come back after dinner to see if you're up to a game of wizard's chess."

After another "tsk" from Pomfrey, he hurried from the hospital wing.

Harry watched his friend leave pondering the new information Ron had brought to his attention. It didn't make sense that Voldemort would even be aware of these isolated incidents between he, Hermione, Ginny and Ron. Was it possible that the Death Eaters had forced Hermione to reveal these private thoughts and memories? And if they had, what could they be trying to accomplish by recreating them? Any why was it taking such a physical toll on him?

He had to be overlooking something. Mulling over every detail until his head began to ache worse than before, one question kept creeping into his mind.

'What are you hiding, Hermione?' Harry thought as he drifted off to sleep.

* * *

**You know what to do!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N:** I would like to dedicate this chapter to Gueneviere. Her review of Chapter 6 inspired me and I thank her.

To my other readers, I would very much like to know what you think of the story. Likes. Dislikes. Constructive criticism. Any input you have that will allow me to write the best story I can write. Thank you!

**Chapter Seven.**

* * *

Later that evening, Hermione found herself standing in front of the full length mirror in her dormitory tugging at her hair. She groaned in frustration, pulling at the curly mess atop her head which stubbornly refused to be tamed. James had followed through on Sirius' suggestion that they spend some time alone together and had asked her to meet him at dinner so they could go for a walk… he hadn't exactly called it a date but it was evident when neither could conceal their flushed cheeks and shy smiles, that whatever it ended up being, it was certainly anticipated to be more than a "walk". 

Hermione could hardly contain her excitement... oh yes, the guilt was still there but, _denial_, she found, was a very powerful tool when one really wanted to ignore that nagging little voice… damned conscience. So, instead she allowed herself to be overpowered by expectation. Expectation that tonight's meeting would be all she had hoped it could be. It had been next to impossible to concentrate in her lessons all day, a most unusual predicament for her as she generally hung on her professors' every word.

But at this particular moment she was desperately wishing it had been Lavender and Parvati's words she had memorized and taken notes on, because she hadn't the slightest notion how to prepare for a quasi-date with the most popular boy in school. Especially since she couldn't be within fifteen feet of said boy without her insides doing what felt like aerobics.

She vaguely remembered watching Lavender curl her hair around her wand on a few occasions and was now trying to replicate that action, however, her wand kept becoming tangled in the mess of curls creating an even bigger disaster. She had only ten minutes before she was due to be in the Great Hall for dinner and was quickly becoming hysterical. 'Why hadn't she spent less time studying Ancient Runes and more time perusing "Witch Weekly" for make up tips?' She scolded herself silently.

Her wand was firmly lodged in what now resembled a bird's nest on the side of her head.

"This is hopeless," she muttered aloud, glaring at her disheveled reflection.

"What's hopeless?" answered a kind voice from the doorway.

Hermione swiveled around to see Alice Bruneau standing near the door smiling curiously at her.

Staring back at her roommate, eyes wide in shock and embarrassment, Hermione debated silently whether it was wise to share with Lily's best friend that she was getting ready to meet James. However, necessity outweighed her need for privacy at that moment and she decided that if she ever wanted to dislodge her wand from the massive knot in her hair then she ought to come clean.

She looked into Alice's sweet, smiling face that looked so much like Neville's and burst into tears.

"I'm… I'm supposed to meet James. And my hair is… is… horrible!"

Alice stifled a laugh, covering her mouth with her hand to spare Hermione's feelings.

"Well," She began, moving towards the sobbing girl, "If you'll promise not to tell Lily that I helped you… I will do my best to fix… er… this." She gestured towards the wand protruding from Hermione's hair.

Hermione emitted a high-pitched cry of relief and gratitude and threw her arms around her roommate's neck.

"Oh! Thank you, Alice! I swear! I swear I'll never tell another living soul that you helped me. I just… I don't know what to do."

Alice placed her hands on Hermione's shoulders and pushed away from her just enough so she could look into her tear-stained face. Smiling warmly at the crying girl in a most maternal fashion, she answered her in a soothing voice, "First of all, you must stop crying. Puffy, red eyes _aren't_ a great look on you."

Hermione laughed softly, her tears abating.

"Now. Let's see what we can do, eh?" And pulling her own wand from within her robes, Alice set to work.

Exactly eight minutes later, Hermione had been transformed. Her hair was now falling loosely down her back in shiny, smooth ringlets. Her brown eyes were lightly accentuated with a shimmery pink eye shadow and a delicate coat of mascara while her lips sparkled with a lightly tinted berry gloss.

Under her robes, Hermione had insisted on wearing her Hogwarts uniform for fear of appearing as though she was "trying too hard"; a pleated skirt that ended a few inches above her knees, a crisp white button down blouse, and knee socks. Alice had compelled her to undo the top two buttons of her shirt, "just in case". Hermione had done so unwillingly…though, she had to admit, the small bit of décolletage that now showed was quite nice.

She stood gaping at the girl now looking back at her from the mirror. 'That girl… she's… rather pretty,' Hermione thought with astonishment. Her face still bearing an expression of utmost shock, she turned to Alice.

"I don't know how to tha-" She began but was cut off almost immediately.

"Don't thank me." Alice said assuredly. "I know it hasn't exactly been easy for you, transferring here in your last year. You deserve to have some fun, Hermione."

This act of selflessness from her roommate nearly brought renewed tears to Hermione's eyes.

"Don't you dare start with the water works again after I've just done your make up!" Alice laughed.

And with that, she grabbed Hermione's hand and dragged her out of the room and towards her first date with James Potter.

* * *

Harry awoke to the feeling of a soft hand brushing his hair gently back off his forehead. His eyes fluttered open and even without his glasses he could make out Ginny's long, silky red hair and porcelain skin. 

Not yet noticing that his eyes were open, she reached for a cool, dampened cloth and began to lightly sponge his face. Despite the pressure of everything going on around them in the wizarding world, the sight of her at that moment mixed with the cool water on his warm face soothed him beyond comprehension. It amazed him that just being close to Ginny gave him the confidence to believe that everything would be alright in the end.

The feeling of waking up with her beside him was unlike anything he'd ever imagined. He nearly forgot that he was lying in the Hogwarts hospital wing.

Never taking his eyes off hers, Harry reached his hand up slowly and laid it softly over Ginny's which was still busy smoothing the cloth over his forehead.

She gave a slight gasp of surprise and her eyes fell to meet his.

"You're awake," She said softly.

Harry just stared back at her… mesmerized by the golden flecks dancing in her eyes when she gazed at him so intensely. They were hypnotic.

He wanted to tell her he loved her, that no other girl ever had nor ever would come close to replacing her, that he couldn't imagine waking up tomorrow without her next to him… but the words wouldn't come. He could feel them lodged in his throat but they didn't budge. All he could do was gaze at her… in silent enthrallment.

She removed the cloth from his face, pulling tenderly away from his touch.

"That was some dream you must've been having," Ginny mused.

"What do you mean?" Harry asked quizzically, struggling to remember anything other than the depth and color of her eyes. God forbid, he had been having another dream about long, dark corridors. He'd had more than enough of that sort.

Ginny looked at him penetratingly. "You were murmuring in your sleep. Something about a wedding…," She answered slowly. "Maybe you just have Bill and Fleur's wedding on your mind right now… because of Hermione." She shifted her gaze from him to peer out the window at the autumn sunset.

"I- I did?" Harry inquired, still trying to clear the remaining fog of sleep from his head so he could think properly.

Suddenly, awareness dawned on him as he slowly began to piece together bits of the scenes that had played out in his slumbering mind and remembered precisely what he had been dreaming about. Or rather, _who_ he'd been dreaming about.

"Oh- er… yes! Bill's wedding. Right." He lied without much conviction. Because his dream was now projecting itself in his head in flawless detail and it was nothing to do with Bill nor Fleur and everything to do with the girl sitting beside him in the small hospital bed.

He had dreamt of a small yet perfectly resplendent wedding, set beside a lightly rippling lake just before sunset. Overwhelming emotion was in the air as he had seen a bride gliding gracefully up the aisle towards him on the arm of… Mr. Weasley.

"That was it then, was it?" Ginny responded suspiciously, still gazing upward towards the sky.

"Er… Yeah. That was it," Harry echoed weakly.

"Well, at least you were able to get some rest," Ginny's voice pushed the remainder of the dream from his thoughts as she slowly began to rise from the bed.

Harry wanted to tell her. He wanted so badly to share with her the truth of what he had seen in his unconscious slumbering mind. She surely deserved to know how he felt.

After all, everyone else knew.

"No, Gin," He confessed as reached out for her hands again. "No, that's not it."

Though, she allowed his strong hands to capture her own, Ginny looked back at him doubtfully.

It didn't appear that she was going to respond so Harry, struggling to sit up further in his bed, made use of the silence to continue.

"Ginny, you know how I… I mean, _everyone_ knows that I..."

"Dinner!" Called Ron from the doorway. He was balancing a large tray saddled with dishes on one hand and carrying his chess set in the other. Marching along behind him were Dobby and Winky, each bearing a full tray of their own.

"I've brought us dinner, mate," Called Ron, excitedly as he headed towards Harry's bed.

Harry fell back against the pillows heaving a defeated sigh.

Ron glanced quickly from Harry's chagrined visage to Ginny's slightly flushed yet exasperated expression and, finally, to their joined hands.

"Ah. Sorry…," He grumbled in embarrassment. "Want me to…?" He jerked his head towards the door.

"It's fine, Ron," Ginny answered readily. "Harry just woke up actually."

"Er… right," Harry said, taking the cue from Ginny that their conversation was officially over. Then, pasting a feigned grin on his face, he craned his neck to see the trays of food, "So, what's for dinner?"

* * *

Hermione approached the Great Hall timidly. The clinking of silverware on plates and buzz of conversation informed her that dinner was already in full swing. Alice had gone inside ahead of her… Hermione had held back confessing that she needed a few moments to gather her thoughts. 

'You're a Gryffindor,' She told herself sternly. 'You can certainly handle _this_.'

Inhaling deeply, she held her head high and walked into the room with what she hoped resembled confidence. She scanned the Gryffindors for a glimpse of James as she moved towards the table.

She saw the back of Remus' head bowed over an open text book, beside him was Peter eagerly helping himself to roast potatoes. Across from them, Sirius sat speaking earnestly with Frank Longbottom as a group of fifth year girls from the Ravenclaw table were turned around in their seats listening to him and, more than likely, admiring his well-bred good looks.

Sirius looked up as Hermione reached the table and swiftly stood to meet her.

Remus and Peter turned to see what had caught Sirius' attention and Peter gasped aloud.

"Wow, Hermione. You look really pretty," He squeaked.

"Thank you, Peter," she answered sincerely.

Remus furrowed his brow and looked back at Sirius who was still observing Hermione solemnly. Sirius took a few steps around the table and walked towards her.

"Where's James?" She asked him skeptically as he stopped in front of her. The look he was directing at her was a bit unnerving.

"He isn't coming," Sirius said quietly. "An owl arrived not long ago. His father is very sick and… James has gone home to be with him." His voice faltered slightly as he spoke. Hermione remembered Sirius once telling her how the Potters had taken him in when he'd run away from his parent's house… they had treated him as a second son and he had loved them as though they were his own family.

"Is it… serious?" She asked, catching herself soon enough to realize that, in this time, she wouldn't know so many details about Sirius's life.

"Yeah… Yeah, I think so." His voice was husky and full of emotion. "He asked me to tell you that he wouldn't be able to meet you and that he… he's sorry."

Hermione nodded silently. She was, of course, disappointed that she and James wouldn't be spending the evening together but was now overwhelmed with the sadness that James' father and the man who would never have the chance to be Harry's grandfather was very ill. Her heart swelled with grief for James, wishing she was able to comfort him somehow.

She looked up at Sirius who tried to appear as though he was casually combing his hair out of his eyes, though at once, she saw that he was attempting to hide his face as he fought to blink back the tears that threatened to spill from his watering eyes.

Ever so slowly, she moved towards him, as though he were an animal that would be easily frightened.

"Sirius…?" Hermione inquired tenderly.

He shook his head indicating that he didn't want to talk just then. Then, with just a sad smile in Hermione's direction, he shoved his hands in his pockets and turned and walked out of the Great Hall.

She stood frozen in place for a moment watching his retreating form. The sadness in his eyes had shaken her to the core. The Sirius she knew… the much older Sirius, had reflected loneliness and, sometimes, regret from his eyes when caught unaware but never defeat. And it was this that scared her and incited her to go after him.

She walked briskly into the Entrance Hall and spun around looking for any sign of him. Movement near the large doorway caught her eye. Sirius was walking so quickly through the grounds that Hermione had to jog to keep him within view. Far down the hill, she could just make him out as he came to rest beneath a familiar Beech tree beside the lake.

She caught up with him a few minutes later slightly out of breath. She stood a few yards away just watching him for a bit, his solemn profile was illuminated by the autumn sunset reflecting off the water as he sat with his arms resting on his knees leaning against the trunk of the large tree. The golden lights interlaced with his rich, black hair as he bowed his head and rested his chin on his arms.

Hermione shuffled her feet, pondering whether she should just let him be. The rustling of the fall leaves in the stillness of the evening had startled Sirius and he turned to see her standing awkwardly a short distance away.

His eyes met hers then just as suddenly he turned and looked back over the water

"Hello," He said distantly.

Hermione took a few more steps towards him and said, "Do you mind if I sit?"

He glanced at her briefly out of the corner of his eye and shook his head.

She slowly sat down beside him on the bed of leaves, watching him as she did. This version of Sirius, so overcome with grief, was heart wrenching to witness. She searched her mind for words of comfort, anything she could say to take some of his pain away, but there was nothing.

So, she did all she could do to offer him comfort. She sat.

And as she sat beside him in silence, the breeze from the lake lightly ruffling their hair, his sorrow was somehow communicated between them. Hermione found herself lost in a labyrinth of emotion… the knowledge that she may never again see Harry and Ron, nor her parents… the intensity of her feelings for James… and now Sirius' pain melded together and she was gone, lost in her memories as she gazed over the rippling surface of the lake. The emptiness in her heart that she had tried in vain to push out of her mind a month ago was aching so badly she felt it hard even to breathe.

How long they were sitting there, she didn't know but when she looked up from the water, she saw that the sun had almost completely retreated behind the trees of the Forbidden Forest.

Her hand reached up to brush away a tear that had unknowingly fallen down her cheek and she become aware that she was crying.

Sirius shifted beside her and he leaned back until he was lying completely flat on his back against the cool ground. Hermione felt cold as he moved away from her and she realized how closely they had been sitting. He lay very still as he gazed up at the stars, their lights mirrored in his dark eyes.

"Lay down, Hermione," He said, his hoarse voice indicating that he too had been crying.

Sirius stretched his arms above him, folding one upon which he rested his head and the other reached out to his side. After a brief moment's hesitation, Hermione let herself rest against the ground at the foot of the tree. She could feel the emanating warmth from his body and almost as if they were magnetically drawn together, her head came to rest on the shoulder of his outstretched arm as she relaxed into him.

Once again they fell into silent contemplation, allowing themselves to find comfort in one another. Sirius's hand rested on Hermione's arm and he brushed his fingers softly over her smooth skin. She shivered.

"Are you cold?" He asked, not taking his eyes away from the dark sapphire sky.

Hermione turned her face towards him, glad that he hadn't noticed that he was the reason she had shivered.

"No," She said plainly, studying his handsome features mutely. She had never seen him at such close proximity.

Sirius raised his hand from Hermione's arm and pointed it towards a spot in the sky above them. There was one star so bright, the others paled beside it.

"That's Sirius," He informed her proudly. "Everyone in my family is named after a star. That one is mine."

Hermione was, of course, aware of this fact and her avidly studious nature had kept her well-versed in Astronomy.

"Yes, the major star of the constellation 'Canis Majoris' meaning 'Greater Dog'," She responded knowledgeably. "The star, originally named from the Greek _'Seirios_' means 'scorching' or 'bright'. The brightest star in the night sky."

His eyes widened vaguely as he turned his face towards hers.

"Right…" He said quietly, clearly impressed.

Hermione smirked and looked over at him. She opened her mouth, fully intending to continue telling Sirius about the constellations... but something in his expression halted her before she could speak.

His eyes traveled over her face. He seemed to be taking in every detail, every freckle, as though he was seeing her for the first time. For several minutes, they remained still, faces inches apart, Hermione wrapped in Sirius' arms, just gazing at one another.

If it was cold out, Hermione was completely oblivious to it. She was aware only of Sirius' slow, steady breath and her heart pounding rapidly in her chest.

Sirius' eyes came to rest on her lips. She moistened them with her tongue nervously under his gaze, detecting that she was somehow much closer to him than they had been before. Hermione began to surrender herself to the comfort and warmth of his nearness.

She closed her eyes and leaned further into his embrace… their faces drew closer… she could feel his breath on her cheek… his warm hands were now lightly touching her face, her hair… she was shivering… their foreheads touched… he ran his fingers over her mouth gently… the desire was mounting inside of her… his hand touched her cheek… her face tilted upward… he bowed his head slightly… then… absolute rapture as their lips met in a feather-light touch… his hands buried in her hair to deepen the soft kiss…

"Ahh!" Hermione yelled in fright.

An abrupt uproar in the tree above startled them and they broke apart. She jerked upwards at the same time as Sirius and their heads collided painfully.

"Bloody hell!" Cursed Sirius, clutching his head in pain. "What was that?"

Hermione looked up at the tree, also holding her throbbing head in both hands. Two large squawking birds were engaged in a violent fight in the branches high above them. A large, dried branch dangled precariously overhead having been snapped in two during the tussle.

Glaring at the offending animals, she looked back at Sirius who, too, had seen the source of the commotion.

"Ruddy birds!" He growled at them, one hand still on the part of his head that had taken most of the impact.

Hermione smiled despite herself as she watched him shaking his fist furiously at the pair of oblivious birds.

"They're bloody lucky James isn't here," Sirius snarled, continuing his angry tirade at the winged offenders. "He would've hexed them in an instant!" Sirius said indignantly.

The smile melted off of Hermione's face instantly.

James!

How could she have been so thoughtless? The man she cared for so completely was at home, surely worried sick over his ailing father… and here she was, lying in the arms of his best friend… star gazing… and kissing, however brief it was.

Sirius deciphered her horrified expression accurately. For a moment, it seemed he was going to try to reason with her but he stopped short.

Running his fingers through his hair in apparent frustration, he frowned at her. "Come on. I'll walk you back."

Neither of them said a word the entire way back to the common room. Hermione felt nauseated with guilt and mentally exhausted, not to mention the pounding in her head from the bump now forming above her left ear. She just wanted to retreat to the solace of her bedroom where she could think.

Sirius saw her to the portrait hole, then claiming he wasn't tired and fancied a walk, he turned, stuffed his hands into his pockets and left, never giving her a second glance.

Ten minutes later, Hermione climbed into bed. She looked out the window at the night sky and saw the lone bright star glowing far off in the distance.

And her head began to throb worse than ever.

* * *

**Oh, Sirius Black... Review and gush about how dashing he is. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **In my profile, I've added photos of the characters in my story, the way I see them when I write. I figured I should share the photos with my readers, in case you were interested in having a peek inside my imagination.

**See my profile for links to the photos and let me know what you think, please! **

I would like to once again thank my reviewers. Life, as we all know, gets pretty crazy from time to time but your reviews make me so happy and make my days so much better!

**Chapter Eight.**

* * *

The room was bathed in morning light causing the inhabitants of the dormitory to stir ever so slightly. But the occupant of the bed nearest the window, however, had not slept a wink. 

'_What was I thinking?'_

Plagued with guilt… sleep hadn't come and there was no sign of exoneration.

'_Could I truly have been so utterly brainless?'_

Hermione beat her fists into her mattress in aggravation.

'_I was lonely. I was thinking of James the whole time. It was almost as though I had kissed him… not Sirius.'_

She could frantically strive to justify her actions to herself all she wanted… but she internalized none of it. She'd been fully aware of what she was doing at the time. Even worse, the thing that made it so much harder to accept, was that… when she stopped to really think about everything that had happened under that tree by the lake… she could not deny that it had felt incredible.

There was no denying the sensation of lying beside Sirius, feeling the warmth from his body radiate through the chilly night air, had been like nothing she'd ever experienced before in her seventeen years of life. Gazing into his shining eyes under a blanket of stars had seemed so natural.

And then there was that kiss.

It was brief, yes… barely a peck even… but the few seconds their lips had connected were magnificent. Sparks had ignited within Hermione's very body and she'd felt hot and cold all at the same time.

If she was truly honest with herself, she knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that James had been the furthest thing from her mind all the while. Despite all that, her rational mind struggled to convince her that it was Sirius' vulnerability and sadness that had caused her to reach out to him last night… of course. She had felt sorry for him and comforted him as best as she could.

'_Liar…'_ The voice in her head accused.

Alas, there was no escaping her conscience.

The tender bump above her ear, now very prominent on her head, was the only remaining souvenir of her tryst by the lake. And it was only worsening the mental war that she was waging upon herself.

Touching the contusion lightly with the tips of her fingers, pain exploded through her skull causing her to curse aloud.

Lily, who had been slowly rousing a few beds away, sat up quickly to find the source of the cry. Her eyes fell upon Hermione, whose was grimacing in pain.

"Hermione?" Lily spoke gently though the cool edge to her voice was apparent. "What's happened?"

'_Of course it has to be Lily!'_ Hermione protested silently, the thought of accepting Lily's help caused a renewed guilt to turn her stomach with nausea and reaction to the pain in her head.

"Nothing's happened," Hermione lied, gingerly getting out of the bed. "I'm fine." She took a few steps when her head pulsated in pain once more and she was overcome with dizziness.

Lily rushed over and caught the weakened Hermione from falling.

"You are _not_ fine," the redhead retorted. "I'm taking you to the hospital wing… now" She added when Hermione looked as though she would argue.

By this time, the clamor had awoken the other girls in the room. Alice rushed over and began inquiring if she could be of service.

"She needs to see Madam Pomfrey," said Lily with an air of impatience. It was obvious to Alice that Lily was still upset that James had apparently transferred his attentions towards Hermione.

The bushy-haired girl wanted to oppose but knew, full well, that she couldn't spend the day ignoring her aching head. So, recognizing when to admit defeat, she allowed herself to be led to the hospital wing for the second time in a week.

Lily and Alice walked into the hospital wing, supporting Hermione between them. They moved slowly and cautiously in the direction of an open bed near the back of the hall.

"Madam Pomfrey?" called Lily, her voice echoing throughout the sterile ward.

The stringent nurse bustled out of her office and towards the three young girls.

"Back so soon, Miss Granger?" She scrutinized the younger girl from head to toe. "It isn't your arm again, is it?"

Hermione shook her head warily. "No, it is my head. I've bumped it on… my bedpost."

She noticed Lily's eyes dart towards her suspiciously as she opened her mouth to contradict the lie.

Before Lily could say a word, Madam Pomfrey scribbled something on her clipboard and waved her hand indicating an empty bed. Hermione murmured a "thank you" to her roommates as they assisted her delicately onto the mattress.

She hated to own up to it but she _was_ grateful… she was in quite a lot of pain.

"Thank you, girls," Madam Pomfrey said briskly. "I'll take it from here."

Lily wasted no time in saying a speedy "goodbye" over her shoulder and headed towards the door. She stopped and turned around waiting for her best friend to follow. Alice hesitated, leaning towards Hermione, she whispered, "I'll be by later to see you… and perhaps you can tell me then, what really happened to your head?" With a knowing smile, she stood and hurried to catch up with Lily as the two girls disappeared through the doorway.

"I really must speak to the Headmaster about the dangers of those dormitory bedposts!" clucked Madam Pomfrey, eyeing Hermione skeptically.

The younger girl paled faintly. "What do you mean?" Hermione asked in a small voice, although she was horrified she knew where this was leading.

"You're the second student today to be admitted with such an injury," the older woman said with a tiny smile, nodding her head towards the bed directly opposite Hermione.

'_Oh no. Please tell me it isn't…'_

"Sirius!" She sputtered. Sitting up in bed across from her sat the handsome Gryffindor, the bandage wrapped around his head couldn't even begin to mar his striking features. He smiled vaguely at her… traces of sorrow still obscured his infamous grin.

Regardless, he managed to answer her playfully. "Vicious, those bed posts. Aren't they?" His eyes twinkled faintly.

­­­

* * *

"We've already told you, Harry!" Ginny said anxiously. 

Ron had been pacing back and forth in front of Harry's bed in the hospital wing for the past forty-five minutes. He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration for the hundredth time.

"Ronald! Will you please stop pacing!?" It wasn't a question. He was driving Ginny mad. Ron stopped abruptly and sat down in a chair beside Harry's bed and immediately began fidgeting with the buttons on his shirt. He couldn't seem to sit still.

Ginny rolled her eyes at his perpetual restlessness.

Normally, Ron's prowling about the room and constant movement would have aggravated Harry as well… but he had other things on his mind at the moment.

"So… neither of you felt the chest pains?" He inquired of the two Weasleys.

They shook their redheads in unison.

"And you both are, obviously, feeling perfectly well…" He muttered.

The siblings nodded solemnly.

"It doesn't make sense that-" Harry began.

"The memory things are affecting us differently," Ron finished.

"Right," said Harry.

The three were engulfed by another moment of silence.

After a few minutes, Ron broke the quiet that had settled around them.

"What we know for sure then, is that there are two factors here. One is causing the weird flashbacks and the other is draining Harry's energy and causing his chest pain. But what this has to do with Hermione… I have no idea."

"I think you need to tell Professor McGonagall about this. If it has anything to with Hermione… the Order needs to know," Ginny stated.

"The Order doesn't know any more than we know, Gin," said Ron.

"Well, what did Professor McGonagall say when you spoke to the Order after Hermione disappeared?" Ginny asked. She had yet to be allowed to attend a meeting of the Order of the Phoenix, much to her chagrin.

Harry answered with clear frustration in his voice. "She said that there was nothing she could tell us and to continue our research as was planned."

"Yeah… they don't know anymore than we know," Ron added.

Ginny sat up straighter. "Wait! She didn't say she didn't _know_ anything…. She said she couldn't tell you anything."

"If she knew something about Hermione… why wouldn't she tell us?" Ron asked incredulously.

Silence fell once more as they contemplated what Ginny had said. Harry and Ron had both interpreted McGonagall's response as though she did not have any information about Hermione's strange disappearance.

"But the Order wouldn't keep us in the dark about something like this. After all we've been through." Harry said, half trying to reassure himself.

Ginny looked skeptical. "Maybe not… but perhaps if McGonagall knew about the visions and memories we're having it would persuade her to _remember _something that might be useful."

Ron and Harry exchanged glances and Harry shrugged. "It's worth a try, I suppose. Let's go."

Harry got up out of bed, slowly as to avoid aggravating his weakened state.

Ginny stood as though ready to catch him should he fall. "You really ought to stay in bed. Madam Pomfrey will never let you just walk out of here."

Ron smirked, "Then we'd better hurry."

And with the two Weasleys flanking Harry, the three of them walked out of the Hospital wing and towards McGonagall's office.

* * *

"Stop staring at me, Sirius," Hermione groaned. They had been in the hospital wing for over and hour and were not permitted to leave until the pain had completely subsided. But her head was still throbbing and making her grouchy. 

He retorted, "I'm not s_taring_ at you. I'm looking out the window. If you haven't noticed, there's one right next to your bed."

She turned her head slowly and glanced at the window. "Oh… um. Sorry."

Hermione knew she was being childish but she was in pain and her confusion over the events of the previous night definitely was not helping.

Looking back over at Sirius, she noticed that he was indeed watching the sky outside the window. She could read the pain that was still reflected in his face… a combination of their collision and, more importantly, waiting for news of Mr. Potter's health. He appeared lost in thought, pensive and almost vulnerable. But one attribute remained… those dark eyes of his were always sparkling. A feature that he would not retain in his adult years, she remembered… but was intriguing none the less. Mesmerizing, even.

"Who's staring now?" Sirius' low voice made her jump.

Hermione felt her cheeks burning with embarrassment. She had been completely ogling him.

Sirius chuckled at her obvious blush. "How about a game of wizard's chess to help pass the time? I'm bloody bored out of my mind."

"Uh… sure," she replied, still humiliated. _'Since when do I stutter so much,'_ she thought.

Patting a spot on the bed beside him, Sirius beckoned her over.

"You want me to come sit with you…. In your bed?" she stammered.

"Well, we can't very well play from across the room, can we?" he reasoned.

Hermione conceded. "I suppose not."

She slowly rose from her bed trying to avoid intensifying her headache and walked over to sit at the foot of Sirius' bed. With a wave of his wand, his wizard's chess set appeared between them.

"You any good?" he inquired, eyeing her with a raised brow.

She smiled ruefully. "I'm absolutely dreadful."

* * *

Harry, Ron and Ginny walked slowly through the corridors towards McGonagall's office. It was so strange to walk the halls no longer a student at Hogwarts, thought Harry. But it was for the best… if anything, seeing all of these young witches and wizards, so oblivious to the dangers that lay ahead, reinforced Harry's desire to defeat Lord Voldemort once and for all. 

As they rounded the corner nearest the large gargoyles that guarded the office, they ran head on into Professor McGonagall and Remus Lupin.

"Professors!" Ginny exclaimed. "I'm so sorry."

"Quite alright, Miss Weasley," replied McGonagall in her usual curt tone as she brushed off her robes. "Coming to see me, I assume?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Ron replied, she still intimidated him immensely.

Professor McGonagall and Remus shared a knowing glance. "Very well. Follow me," she said.

She and Remus both turned and led the way back to the Headmistress's office.

Once they had all taken their respective seats, McGonagall spoke.

"What can I do for you, Potter, Weasley, Weasley?" She nodded at each of them.

"Professor," Harry began, leaning forward in his seat. "I don't feel that I can sit by idly and wait for the Order to decide we're old enough to hear news of Hermione's disappearance. I want to know what you know. Everything you know."

"Potter. You may no longer be a student at Hogwarts but I must insist on you speaking to me with respect in my school," she said evenly.

Harry apologized but did not back down. "We, the three of us, have been having these odd flashbacks… and we can sense Hermione's emotions."

Ginny jumped in, "It has happened to all three of us."

"And they are making Harry sick," Ron finished.

"Sick? Are you alright, Harry?" Remus asked, his voice laden with concern.

"I'm fine," Harry insisted. "But-" He was cut off.

"Dumbledore said something like this could happen, Minerva."

Harry, Ron and Ginny looked at one another in shock.

"What do you mean '_Dumbledore _said this could happen'?" Harry demanded, look back and forth between Professors McGonagall and Lupin.

"For Goodness sake, Remus," McGonagall hissed, "I'm aware of what Albus said."

"Will one of you PLEASE explain what is going on here?" Harry said, trying to control his anger. He hated being treated like a child… after everything he had accomplished in his young life; he was still being treated like a helpless child.

Professor McGonagall sighed. "Very well, Potter," she said in a most resigned tone of voice. "Miss Granger has not been abducted nor is she in any danger. She has been sent back in time – "

"What?!" Exclaimed Ron, his eyes wide.

Harry was on his feet in an instant. "And neither of you thought it necessary to inform us of this?! We've been worried sick, as you well know!" He was furious.

"Sit down, Harry," Remus spoke calmly.

"Don't you dare!" Harry shouted. "Don't you dare treat me like a child. You are going to tell me what you know and you are going to tell me NOW!"

"Mister Potter! Control yourself." Said McGonagall, raising her voice for the first time. "I will explain after you sit down and _act_ like an adult."

Harry reluctantly sat down and folded his arms across his chest. Maybe he wasn't acting like an adult but he was too angry to care.

"Now. Like I said, Miss Granger has been sent back in time. We _think_ it may have been an unfortunate incident with a time turner, only Miss Granger and Professor Dumbledore knew for sure, but we do know that she is safe," She held up a hand when Harry opened his mouth to argue again. "Please let me finish, Potter. The reason that none of you have been informed is because, long ago, Professor Dumbledore had us each swear not to divulge this information to anyone for fear of changing the time line."

"Professor?" Ginny interjected. "If Hermione has already gone back in time, how could _we_ possibly change the time line?"

Professor McGonagall glanced up at the portrait of a soundly sleeping Albus Dumbledore that graced the wall of the office. "The timeline will undoubtedly be changed… in ways we still have yet to see. However, due to events that occurred during Hermione's stay in the past, if anything were to be tampered with… there would be serious implications."

"You knew her," Harry said in a voice barely more than a whisper. "You knew her then, didn't you?"

"We both did, Harry," Remus answered.

"You?" Harry puzzled. And then it dawned on him. "She knew my Mum and Dad, didn't she?"

"Yes, Harry. She knew all of us." He confirmed sadly.

Harry fell quiet… looking at his feet, contemplative.

"What will happen to her? If you were there, then you must know," Ron asked cautiously.

"We don't know," Remus answered frankly. "We think she may have found a way to return to the present… but there is no way of knowing for sure, until she comes back – "

"- If, she comes back," Harry acknowledged.

"Yes, Harry," said McGonagall, her eyes slightly misty.

Remus leaned forward on his knees. "She did… leave a note…" he began.

"Remus!" McGonagall scolded. "I think we've said enough."

"No! I want to know," Harry said, standing again.

"We've told you everything that we know regarding where she is and that she is safe. We have Order members working on finding out how this horrible state of affairs happened in the first place. If you please, Mister Potter, I think you have your own research to see to, do you not?"

To everyone's surprise Harry did not argue. He stood and thanked both McGonagall and Lupin then turned and walked out of the room followed closely by Ron and Ginny.

Once back in Ginny's room, they all sat… dumbfounded.

"What d'you reckon, Harry?" Ron asked.

"I don't know. But the flashbacks we're having must have something to do with all of this."

"And if anyone could find a way back from the... past, it's Hermione," Ron stated, still in shock.

Ginny stood. "Library?" she asked readily.

The two boys nodded and they headed towards the only place they knew that might hold the answers they so badly needed.

* * *

Three hours and two games of wizard's chess later, Hermione and Sirius were leaning against the headboard of his bed eating sandwiches brought to them by the school house elves. Sirius was telling Hermione all about a prank he and James had played in their fourth year… they were both laughing loudly despite their still aching heads. 

"And to think I rushed over here because I thought you two were hurt…"

They stopped laughing and turned to see who had spoken.

"James!" Hermione jumped up then instantly regretted it. She clutched her head but remained standing. "When did you get back?"

James raised an eyebrow. "About ten minutes ago. Remus told me that Sirius had hurt himself and that you hadn't been in class all day. I was worried."

"Ah, sorry mate. She's accident prone," Sirius joked but clearly noticed James suspicious demeanor. Then remembering suddenly, "How's your dad?"

James smiled, "He should be fine, Thank Merlin! Mum sent lots of food for you… she says you're too thin"

The two boys laughed and Hermione let out the breath she'd been holding. She approached James tentatively and reached out to give him a hug. He wrapped his arms around her, seeking much needed comfort.

"I'm so glad that he's alright, James," she whispered truthfully.

He pulled back and looked her in the eyes, "Thank you. And I believe I owe you a walk?"

She blushed. "And we'll have our walk. But for now, you are probably exhausted and Madam Pomfrey will kill me if she finds me out of bed."

"Or in Sirius' bed?" James pointed out. "What happened to you two anyways?"

"I hit my head on my bed post," they both responded at the same time. They looked at each other, eyes wide, and then back to James, unable to disguise the guilt tracing their features.

James glanced back and forth between the two. He opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted.

"You know how Pomfrey is, James. She just wants to hover over us a bit longer." Sirius said quickly.

"Right," James said, "Of course."

He looked slightly disappointed that his walk with Hermione would be postponed further but he _was_ awfully tired. "I'll be back a bit later then."

With a hopeful smile to Hermione and wave to Sirius, James turned and walked out of the hospital ward.

Hermione sank back down onto the foot of the bed. She looked at Sirius and their eyes met.

"Well, that's good. That James' dad is going to be alright," she said quietly, trying to ignore the fact that the expression in his eyes was making her stomach flutter again.

"Yeah," Sirius replied. "Yes, it's great." Allowing himself to smile softly.

Just then, Madam Pomfrey came bustling out of her office and saw the mess of their lunch and the wizard's chess pieces all over the bed.

"What's all this?" she scolded, waving her hand at the bed.

Without tearing his eyes away from Hermione's, and clearly not referring to the clutter upon the bed, Sirius answered her...

"It's too soon to tell."

* * *

**Let me know what you think... review :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

I would like to thank my wonderful reviewers, especially Anasella Emm, for all of her help with the proof-reading and motivation. And for keeping me company during our late night writing fests.

**ATTENTION:** There is smut in this chapter… consider yourself warned.

**Chapter Nine.**

* * *

The next few days found Hermione staunchly avoiding Sirius Black. 

Though, he wasn't exactly pursuing her... in fact, he was acting as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened at all. He was going about his typical Marauder business... besting everyone in each of his classes, causing mischief with his friends, and most infuriating of all, flirting with the entire female population of Hogwarts.

But Hermione refused to back down. Honestly, who did Sirius Black think he was? Did he think he could kiss his best friend's... well... his best friend's... friend... and then just ACT like NOTHING had happened?

Well, Hermione Granger was no fool. And so, she avoided him. Refused to make eye contact with him when she was sure he was trying to catch her eye in class and kept their conversations to the bare minimum of cordialities.

This situation was just fine with her though... because now she had more than enough time to spend getting to know James. Which completely took her mind off of the Ravenclaw girl that Sirius had taken an interest in... Who, if Hermione cared to mention, was not much to look at. But Hermione didn't care to mention that... in fact, she barely noticed that the two love birds had taken to snogging in the corridors between lessons and passing notes in the Great Hall.

Nope... Hermione noticed no such thing.

"Hermione"

No... She definitely hadn't paid any attention to Sirius Black.

"Oy! Hermione!"

Hermione spun around to see James flagging her down from across the corridor. He crossed the distance between them in a few long strides.

"Are you coming to Potions or are you planning to watch Sirius and Callie snog all afternoon?"

"What!?" Hermione gasped. Looking back she realized she had indeed been watching them. "Oh... err. I thought I... left my quill in the Transfiguration room..." She answered pathetically.

James raised an eyebrow as he glanced from the still kissing couple and back to Hermione. "Unless, one of them swallowed it... they won't be much help to you," he chuckled, his deep laugh bringing a smile to her face. "Let's go."

He grabbed her hand and laced his fingers through hers as he dragged her off towards the Potions classroom.

* * *

Harry fought to keep his eyes open, though it was becoming more and more difficult not to fall asleep. Rubbing his eyes resignedly, he sighed and turned the page of the giant encyclopedia he had been searching through that day. 

He, Ron and Ginny had been researching in the library for hours every day trying to find something that could possibly explain the strange reactions they'd been having due to Hermione's disappearance.

Needless to say, they hadn't come across anything yet.

"This is impossible," Ron groaned, the red imprint on his cheek a visible sign that he'd been using his book as a pillow. "We don't even know what we're looking for!"

Ginny raised her head from the dusty tome on the table before her. "He's right Harry. Let's take a break… we're not getting anywhere this way."

Harry was so tired the words on the page he'd been staring at appeared as a large, jumbled mass of indecipherable text. He removed his glasses and wiped the lenses on his shirt. He placed them back on and, again, tried to focus on the page he'd been failing to read for the past twenty minutes. It didn't help.

He conceded, nodding in agreement with Ron and Ginny as he began gathering up the numerous sheets of parchment upon which he'd scribbled bits of potentially helpful information.

With a wave of her wand, Ginny sent all of the large books that had covered their table flying back to their rightful places on the shelves. Hermione's copy of "Hogwarts: A History" remained on the table… they had taken to bringing it with them to the library to serve as a reminder… motivating them to keep searching for answers to find their friend.

But tonight, even Hermione's signature book couldn't encourage them to keep running on fumes…. Shoving the large book into her bag, Ginny led the way as they dragged their weary bodies out of the library to get some much needed rest.

Upon entering Ginny's room, the smell of Harry's favorite steak and kidney pie, a Hogwarts' House Elf specialty, enveloped them. The table had been set with enough food for the entire Weasley family and then some.

"Thank Merlin for Dobby!" Ron said as he collapsed on the couch shoving a roll into his mouth.

They each filled their plates and the next several minutes were spent in silence as the friends devoured their dinner deep in contemplation.

* * *

They were halfway to Professor Slughorn's classroom before Hermione realized that her hand was still engulfed in James' strong grip. He'd ceased dragging her and they were now walking side by side through the busy corridors. 

Hermione gaped down at their joined hands and up to James' amused expression. The shock was evident on her face.

"You look like you've been petrified," he laughed.

She snapped her mouth shut. Glancing at the students moving around them, she became aware that they were all reacting to the girl holding hands with the Head Boy and a smile slowly crept across her face as she tightened her grip on his hand ever so slightly.

James winked at her. "Much better. Not a walking fly trap anymore?"

"Sorry," she began timidly. "I just…"

"I know," he said, leaning down a bit so he could speak into her ear. "But they were bound to see eventually." He gestured to their hands as he spoke.

The giddiness that mounted within her at his words threatened to spill out in a squealing teenage frenzy, but before it could completely register with Hermione, they'd arrived at the Potions classroom. It was probably for the best, however. Merlin knows what kind of disaster would strike if Hermione turned into some sort of giggling adolescent Marauder groupie while trying to brew a shrinking potion.

She took her usual seat behind James, alongside another seventh year Gryffindor girl. Smiling at Alice, two tables away, she unloaded her supplies as Professor Slughorn began explaining the effects of a shrinking potion. Hermione rolled her eyes at Alice… a _shrinking_ potion was self-explanatory, was it not? The girls snickered, unnoticed by the corpulent Professor.

"And whoever brews the best shrinking potion today will receive a very special treat from me," boomed Professor Slughorn. "You'll find everything you need in the storage cabinets and – "

Just then, Sirius sauntered into the class, his trademark good looks drawing every eye to him.

"Sorry I'm late, Professor," Sirius' charisma charming the ever persuasive Slughorn. "Pressing matters to attend to."

Slughorn erupted in roaring laughter. "Of course, Mister Black. My dear boy. Take your seat. I'm sure you'll need no assistance with a mere shrinking potion, clever boy."

Sirius grinned and took his seat beside James. Being one of Slughorn's favorites definitely had its perks.

James clapped his friend on the back as he joined him at the table. They ducked their heads together and began whispering away, no doubt exchanging gossip about Sirius' flavor of the month, Callie Truex.

"Let's get started then," announced Slughorn as he retreated into his adjoining rooms and the students began bustling around gathering the necessary ingredients for their potion assignment.

Hermione was walking back towards her seat with an armload of ingredients when she saw Lily approach James briskly. James, who was still listening intently to Sirius' animated conversation, looked up at her with a curious look on his face that he quickly masked with something akin to cockiness. Classic Marauder style.

"Evans," he greeted her cheekily. "To what do we owe the _pleasure_ of your company?"

His sarcasm was not lost on her. Her green eyes flashed in annoyance.

"You borrowed my quill during our last meeting with the prefects. I'd like it back please," she spoke in a controlled, even tone.

James' smug grin faltered slightly, as though he'd been expecting a different answer but not about to be undone by the school's sweetheart in front of his friends he maintained his façade.

"C'mon Evans. You don't have to make up excuses," he threw a playful grin to Hermione over Lily's shoulder. "Everyone knows that you've got a thing for Remus over here." He gestured with his thumb at the Marauder quietly mixing his potion a few feet away.

"Keep me out of it, Prongs," Remus warned mildly without looking up.

Lily's face grew red and she balled her fists. "Believe it or not, Potter, I genuinely did come over here for the sole purpose of retrieving my favorite quill. And not that it matters, but for your information, Remus is the ONLY one of you prats worth a damn."

The smile didn't leave James' face but the playful glint in his eye vanished at her words. He stood up, rising to his impressive full height so that she had to look up to meet his eyes.

"That's excellent news, Evans, because, as of very recently, it seems Sirius and I are off the market."

"Oh, so you two have finally confessed your undying love for one another, I see," Lily shot back, waving her hand indicating Sirius and James. "Congratulations."

The students surrounding them had stopped their potion making and were intently watching the ensuing argument with great anticipation. The entire student body had thought the days of the great Evans - Potter epic rows were a thing of the past... it was only a matter of time before they traded verbal sparring for snogging. But it seems things had taken turn for the worst.

"Very funny, _Lily_," James said as took a step closer. "I know it must be difficult for you to wrap your mind around the fact that there are other desirable females in this school besides yourself."

Remus saw that this argument was only going to continue escalating and stepped in. "Come on, James. Stop th-"

"I don't believe I ever said anything about me being 'desirable', _James. _Those are your words, not mine," Lily cut in. Her eyebrow raising in warning.

James opened his mouth to retaliate but realized that he had indeed admitted that she was desirable. She had thrown him for a loop and he struggled to think of something to counter her remark.

Thankfully, Sirius jumped in to save him. "Evans, Evans," Sirius said in his most charming tone as he slipped his arm around her shoulders. "I am sorry to break the news but I am no longer a bachelor. It's true. I have, for the moment, taken up with the lovely Callie Truex of Ravenclaw. But if you're interested, I hear Snivellus is single -"

"Oh, shut it, Black! Do you ever think of anyone but yourself?" Lily shook off his arm. "As if everyone hasn't already seen you and Callie christening the corridors between classes."

Sirius smiled broadly. "What can I say? I'm irresistible."

"You're an arrogant ass, Black. Just as bad as -"

"Me?" James chuckled. He reached into his bag and pulled out a purple quill. And with a calm and genuine smile towards Lily, he handed her the feathered pen. "Here you are, Evans. We're just playing around, truce?"

"Of course, we're just playing around. All that nonsense about James being off the market," Sirius laughed along with a few spectators.

James gave Sirius a pointed look. "That bit is true, actually," he said honestly with a smile towards Hermione who was still standing beside her cauldron watching the scene unfold.

Both Sirius and Lily, along with the rest of their class, looked towards Hermione, who said nothing... she just stared back at James. She didn't know that he was planning on making... whatever it was between them official, so soon.

Lily, who had not only seen them walk into class hand in hand, but had observed their behavior towards one another for the past month, was not shocked by this revelation. She looked back to James and it was clear their argument was over. She had her quill, that's all she had wanted from him, she told herself.

"Thank you, James," said Lily tactfully, holding her quill as she walked back to her seat, looking anywhere but at Hermione.

James nodded in response to Lily but didn't look away from Hermione. He smiled broadly at her, shrugged his shoulders as if to reiterate, 'they had to find out eventually', and went about his potion making.

Hermione could feel that she was blushing furiously. She waited to look up from her cauldron until she was sure everyone had lost interest in the heated exchange that had gone on. When she did finally raise her head, her eyes were met by Sirius' steel gray gaze.

His expression was penetrating... searching yet playful. A very small smile played on his face though his eyes appeared resigned, he gave her a reconciled nod and turned back to his work.

* * *

Harry awoke to the sound of a door closing. He sat up and straightened his glasses, squinting his eyes to focus so he could take in his surroundings. He was still on the small sofa in Ginny's sitting room but the room was almost completely dark, apparently he had fallen asleep after dinner while discussing with Ron and Ginny their findings from that day's library search. 

The closing door that had awoken Harry must have been Ron departing to his own room, he reasoned, still slightly hazy from his deep slumber, because he noticed that his friend was no longer sitting in his usual spot near the fireplace.

The room was bathed in silvery moonlight which cast shadows across the floor. Following the stream of light towards its source with his eyes, Harry saw Ginny asleep peacefully in the armchair nearest the window.

The fire had burnt down to glowing embers that entwined with the limpid moonlit streaks to create a hazy effect throughout the room… and it illuminated the youngest Weasley in a way that made her look nothing less than angelic.

Harry could have easily watched her sleep all night. However, he was sure that if he left her in that chair, she'd wake in the morning with a terrible cramp in her neck that would pain her the entire next day.

He approached her silently; slowly he eased one arm around her shoulders, looped the other under her knees and gently lifted her tired body from the chair. She stirred slightly in his arms, reaching one of her hands up to rest on his shoulder, nuzzling her face into his neck. Her warm breath sent shivers down his spine.

Cautiously, Harry carried the beautiful redhead into her adjoining bedroom, lingering slightly longer than necessary while he allowed her soft touch to caress his neck.

As he approached her double bed, he bent slightly to lay her gently upon the smooth emerald green comforter. Her hand remained cupped around his neck so he tenderly pried it away, against his own selfish wishes to continue feeling her touch.

Seeing her laying so serenely, her brilliant red hair splayed out upon the pillow beneath her head, he wished desperately that he could stay there all night, just watching her sleep. But rather, he placed a chaste kiss upon her forehead and slowly turned to leave when her sleep-laden voice stopped him.

"Stay, Harry," Ginny said sweetly. Her eyes were half open and she was smiling softly up at him.

Harry was frozen, convinced he was dreaming and half hoping he'd never wake up.

"What?" Was all he could think to say.

Ginny propped herself up on her elbow, her long hair hanging like a silky curtain.

"I want you to stay."

Harry took a step towards the bed, hardly daring to believe his ears.

"Are you sure? You're awake aren't you? I mean, I'm awake too right?" He was so bewildered by this encounter that he scarcely knew which way was up.

She smiled, amusement dancing in her eyes.

He took another tentative step towards her.

"I'm sure," Ginny avowed.

With those words, Harry crossed the remaining distance and came to stand beside her bed. He was unsure of how to progress from this point. He'd only ever dreamed of being with Ginny in this way… in fact; he'd never been with any girl.

Harry flushed, "I don't really… know… I've never-"

"Neither have I, Harry," she answered, knowing what he was trying to say.

"You… you haven't?"

She shook her head and sat up on the bed directly in front of him. She delicately reached out and took his hand, pulling him slightly closer so he was flush with the side of the bed.

"It's always been you, Harry."

Harry gazed at her in disbelief. Was it possible that the girl of his dreams had actually saved herself… for him? It was too awe-inspiring for words.

His mind was a blur of astonishment and abundance as he stood in the warm bedroom staring into the golden brown eyes of the girl he loved.

Ginny took his other hand in hers, and raised herself up onto her knees upon the bed. Tilting her face up, she snaked her arms around Harry's neck, their faces mere inches apart. Her eyes penetrated his, searching for an answer, for the words she so badly needed to hear.

Harry couldn't believe that he was here… that everything he'd been dreaming of was right in front of his eyes, wanting him just as badly as he needed her. So he spoke the truth… the most honest words he had ever said.

"I love you, Ginny." And he knew more than anything that he meant it with all of his heart.

Their gaze never faltered as a solitary tear trailed down Ginny's cheek. Harry brushed it away gently with his thumb and kissed the tear stained spot on her soft skin. He kissed a trail towards her ear and repeated those divine words, whispering as he caressed her face and ran his fingers through her glossy hair.

"I love you."

Ginny tilted her head to the side; her eyes alight with passion as she cupped his face in her hands.

"And I love you, Harry Potter."

The words had barely escaped her lips when Harry closed the space between them in a searing kiss… one that fought to make up for lost time and convey a lifetime of emotions.

Harry wrapped his arms around Ginny's waist, pulling her flush against him, deepening their kiss.

And though neither was sure who was leading the way, they both began leaning back onto the bed without breaking their kiss.

Ginny's hands toyed with Harry's unruly hair, slipping his glasses off and discarding them onto the nightstand as they both lay down crushed against one another.

Feeling her body even with his, caused Harry's heart to beat, if possible, even faster than before. Their kisses grew more and more urgent, both yearning to explore and experience the other as they never had before.

Ginny's hands played at Harry's waist before lifting the hem of his shirt and tracing a pathway upward, she splayed her fingers across his muscular stomach. Her hands slid over his warm skin and across his back causing Harry to groan aloud in delight.

Harry entwined his fingers in Ginny's scarlet locks before descending his hand upon the neckline of her blouse, where he began fumbling with the delicate ivory buttons.

Ginny's hands reached up and stopped his fruitless effort as she gently urged Harry onto his back and straddled him. She sat up, looking directly into his bight green eyes as she unbuttoned her blouse, slipping it off her shoulders and onto the floor.

She leaned forward and once again met Harry's lips in an intense kiss. His hands roamed freely over her newly exposed skin as Ginny reveled in the feeling of his arousal against her body. Reaching down, she tugged upwards on Harry's t-shirt, persuading him to rise up just enough to pull the shirt over his head. Her eyes lit up at the sight of his muscular chest and arms, and she bent forward to place heated kisses along his collarbone and across his chest.

Harry toyed slightly with the button on her jeans, and Ginny reacted by grinding her hips ever so slightly and moaning softly against Harry's neck. That was all the persuasion he needed and he deftly unbuttoned her jeans and slid them down her hips. She leaned forward on her knees to crush her lips against his again allowing him to remove her jeans altogether.

Harry enfolded her waist in one arm and rolled her now onto her back and he propped himself up beside her, his hands wandering across her taught stomach. Ginny reached over and wasted no time in ridding Harry of his pants as well. Harry pushed himself up so he was directly above Ginny now; staring down at her with such evident intensity and love that she felt her heart might burst.

Harry soaked in the view of Ginny in her pink and green bra and panties, barely able to control his mounting desire.

Leaning on one elbow, he slid one bra strap from her shoulder, then the other. Ginny arched her back, pressing herself against Harry's erection resulting in another audible groan from him, and in one swift motion, she unclasped her bra and tossed it aside.

Her chest was heaving with her excited breath, as Harry dipped his head; placing light kisses down her neck and agonizingly slowly, closed his mouth over the tip of her firm breast. Ginny inhaled sharply with delight.

She placed her hands on Harry's hips and little by little inched his boxers down and finally removed them entirely.

All that stood between them now was the nearly transparent layer of cotton and lace of Ginny's panties. Harry pressed himself against her moistened center, barely able to maintain control over himself.

Ginny reached up to Harry's face, tilting it up so she could meet his eyes… and she nodded. That was all the encouragement Harry needed as he virtually tore her underwear away from her body, allowing himself to come so close to feeling her completely.

She placed her hands on his hips and urged him towards her. Bracing his gaze upon Ginny's face, Harry pressed himself into her gradually yet firmly. He reached the point where he knew he must be forced to cause her pain. He captured her lips and pressed hard against her mouth as he thrust into her, feeling the tearing of skin and sharp cry from Ginny.

He searched her face for a sign she wanted him to stop, but there was none. But she smiled, her expression one of yearning and rapture, she wanted more.

Harry gazed back at her in adoration as he began to slowly move in and out of her, overwhelmed by the sensation of her warmth enveloping him.

They began to move together in time, Ginny raising her hips to meet his thrusts, match for match. Their tempo increased as a warmth began to spread throughout Harry's body and he could sense what was coming.

Ginny whimpered softly as she too felt her release swelling within her. They moved faster yet as Harry gripped Ginny's hip with one hand pressing her firmly into the mattress.

She wrapped one leg around his waist granting him deeper access to her body.

"Oh Gods, Ginny…" Harry whispered.

Their pace quickened to a frenzy of passion. His grip tightened on Ginny's hip as he thrust into her one final time, expelling himself within her at the same moment that Ginny cried out his name, as she too reached her point of ecstasy.

Harry collapsed beside her, panting. He pulled Ginny to him.

"I love you, Ginevra," he repeated once more.

She sighed contentedly in response and snuggled closer to him.

Kissing her forehead, he held fast to the woman he loved as they both drifted off to sleep in blissful exhaustion.

* * *

**Review and let me know what you think!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

Thank you as always to those who took the time to review. You guys are wonderful.

An extra big thanks to Anasella Emm for motivating me everyday!

**Chapter Ten.**

* * *

Hermione wasn't unaccustomed to stares. 

She had gotten quite a few when she was always the first to raise her hand to answer a question in class. And the time she'd been asked to the Yule Ball by none other than Viktor Krum, she was met with shocked stares by the rest of the student body. Not to mention that she was best friends, with Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived.

Hermione was definitely not a stranger to stares.

But this? This was unusual, even for Hermione Granger.

Every where she went… every move she made was followed by the critical eyes of the entire female population of Hogwarts. She could almost hear their thoughts as she passed, a thousand eyes trained on her passing form.

"What does James Potter see in her?"

"She's not even that pretty if you _really_ look at her."

"He chose _her_ over Lily Evans?"

Oh yes, she knew what they were thinking… and, of course, it made her uncomfortable… but Hermione had one thing they didn't have.

She had James.

She had never dreamed it could be but there it was. James wanted her. Not Lily. And not any other girl.

Hermione finally had what she wanted. After years of unrequited love, someone loved her back… and not just any someone… **the **James Potter.

The guilt that had plagued Hermione every time she locked eyes with Lily Evans had not subsided. She wasn't completely without a conscience. She was fully aware that her relationship with James was keeping he and Lily from falling in love and creating the future that she knew would bring Harry into the world.

Moral ambiguity…. was not one of the many subjects in which Hermione was well versed.

In all honesty, she couldn't help herself.

But surely Harry would want her to be happy? And when, or if, she ever returned to her own time… Harry would never have to know, right?

These were the words and phrases that she repeated to herself… never actually believing it… but letting it sink in just enough that she could enjoy every smile James sent her way and immerse herself in his smell every time he wrapped his arms around her, securing her against him.

It was still strange for Hermione to be the envy of every girl at Hogwarts. James always laughed his deep chuckle whenever she expressed this concern to him.

"Imagine the looks you'd get if we spent all our free time snogging like Sirius and Callie, eh?" He'd said, waggling his eyebrows at her suggestively.

"Looks?! More like death threats, James!" Hermione had laughed in response.

While Sirius and Callie had continued to, well…as Remus had put it, "allow their relationship to evolve" in the corridors between classes, James and Hermione had yet to progress beyond hand holding and cuddling in the common room.

Though, there hadn't truly been time for them to explore their affections further. Between James' meetings with the prefects and Quidditch practice along with Hermione's hectic study schedule, spare time was at a premium… and alone time was slim to none.

Hermione began to understand Sirius' exhibitionism in the hallways as probably the only time he and Callie could possibly find to spend with one another.

But she did wonder… when her eyes would wander during History of Magic… focusing on James' mouth… if he would be a good kisser. The answer was decidedly, yes. He wasn't so experienced as Sirius but James _was_ nearly as confident and Hermione had no doubt of his skills in that department.

But how to get James alone? Away from his throngs of female admirers and marauding mates, James Potter may just prove to be everything Hermione had ever imagined him to be… and more.

She'd have to worry about James and his …. _talents_…. Another time though.

It was a crisp fall afternoon this particular Monday and Hermione was on her way to Dumbledore's office to further discuss her time turning predicament. After all, it wasn't every day seventeen year old girls from the future landed on the Hogwarts grounds.

"Sugar Quills," Hermione stated clearly to the stone gargoyles guarding the Headmaster's office.

They glided to the side, admitting her to the spiral staircase which she climbed steadily. She raised her hand to knock on the wooden door when a voice from within stopped her.

"Come in, Miss Granger."

'Dumbledore could put Mad-Eye Moody to shame with his ability to see through walls,' she thought with a smile as she pushed open the heavy door.

"Good afternoon, Miss Granger," Dumbledore greeted her warmly, gesturing to the chair set before his desk.

She paused briefly to admire Fawkes upon his perch before taking her seat.

"Good afternoon, Professor."

"I trust that you have been conducting your research as we discussed?" He asked her, gazing over his half-moon spectacles with that penetrating gaze.

She flushed guiltily. In all honesty, she'd been putting her research second to spending time with James…

"I've… I have done some, Sir," she said meekly.

He nodded.

"Then, I would be correct in assuming that you have not found any information that will be of use to us in understanding how you came to be with us, in this time. Is that right?"

"Yes, Sir," Hermione answered, looking at her feet.

For a moment, Dumbledore simply studied her with his eyes. Hermione looked back at him sheepishly… fleeting thoughts of spending time with James rather than researching in the library sped through her mind.

Then, as hint of a smile flashed across his wizened visage, he spoke again.

"I see. Well, let us begin then at the most logical point, shall we?"

"Sir?" She questioned, her head cocked to one side quizzically.

Dumbledore's trademark blue eyes sparkled as he spoke again.

"The beginning, Miss Granger, is always the best place to commence one's journey, is it not?"

Hermione smiled at his familiar wit and nodded in understanding.

He continued, "Let us attempt to construct a basic understanding of what was occurring at the precise moment you departed from your own time and came to be here."

Hermione had shared quite a lot of information pertaining to the future with Dumbledore when she had first arrived in the past. He was aware that, in her time, she knew the descendants of some of the current students as well as, he, himself.

"Yes, Sir," she began, contemplating her words. "I was in London, at the home of Siri- … um…. my best friend's Godfather. We had been searching for information on horcru- … I mean, information on a certain Dark Wizard…. for… for school."

Dumbledore's expression seemed to say that he had comprehended everything… even the words she had deliberately omitted.

"From where were you obtaining this information, Miss Granger?"

"A library. The private library of a family that had once held ties to the dark arts."

He leaned forward slightly in his chair.

"Is this where you were when you were pulled into the past?"

"Yes, Sir," she repeated. "I had been attempting to translate a book that was written in a form of Ancient Runes I hadn't seen before."

"How much were you able to decipher from this book?"

"Not much, I'm afraid," She responded apologetically. "I had only translated a few lines when… _it _happened. One moment, I was reading and the next I was falling… in a manner of speaking."

Dumbledore studied her once again in silence, his index fingers pressed to his mouth in thought.

"I'm sorry I'm not more help, Professor," Hermione said sincerely.

The Headmaster smiled tenderly.

"Miss Granger, I think you are to be excused from any such concerns considering the extenuating circumstances that brought you to us in the first place."

Hermione smiled. She opened her mouth to speak but Dumbledore raised his hand and she fell silent.

"I think that is rather enough for today. I shall allow you to consider any additional information that you feel may be of use to us which we may discuss at our next appointment."

Hermione stood, feeling slightly abashed… that she had let him down.

"Yes, of course, Sir."

As she turned to leave, his voice stopped her once more.

"You may want to avoid the third floor corridor as you leave. I think you'll find that anyone who enters the hallway is suddenly stricken with the most determined of tickling sensations. Who, may I ask could be behind such a terrible act?"

As his question was clearly rhetorical, he dismissed Hermione with the tiniest of winks.

She shook her head in disbelief as she exited the office. Dumbledore's all-knowing capability never ceased to amaze her.

* * *

"You fell asleep in the library?" Ron asked dubiously. 

Harry rubbed the back of his neck, nervously. "Yeah… I was pretty tired. I didn't get back to our room until you'd already gone to sleep."

"Must've been," Ron said contemplatively. "Then, where were you this morning?"

"_This_ morning?" Harry posed the question, stalling for time. "I… well, the weather was nice… so, I went out flying for a bit down on the Quidditch pitch."

"Without your Firebolt?" Replied Ron, curiously.

When Harry looked back at his red-headed friend vacantly, Ron provided further information.

"Your Firebolt was still in the cupboard in our room this morning…"

"Uh… oh yeah. I used one of the old school brooms. I didn't want to wake you, so I just dressed and headed out," said Harry trying his hardest to sound nonchalant.

Ron nodded slowly, processing this information.

"Right. Well, you ought to be tired then since the night before last you spent reading through 'Hogwarts: A History'… cover to cover."

"Huh?" Harry responded automatically. Then quickly recovering, "Oh right! I was hoping that there would be some useful information in there, the way Hermione was always referencing it."

Harry knew he was a devastatingly bad liar, especially when it came to his best friend. He didn't _want_ to lie to him but he was positive this was a better solution than explaining to Ron where he had actually been spending the past few nights.

Besides, his reconciled relationship with Ginny was still so new that he wasn't sure either of them would be ready to discuss it just yet. And even then, Ron would be exempt from any and all details concerning how and when this reunion came about. Harry had absolutely no desire to face the wrath of all seven Weasley men should they find out that he had "corrupted" their Ginny.

"And…?" Ron pressed on.

"And?" Harry repeated in confusion.

"Did you find anything? In the book?"

"Right, the book. Um… no. Nothing new," Harry supplied rapidly.

Ron laughed incredulously, shaking his head at his distracted friend, "And I thought I was thick."

"Shhhhh!"

The reprimand from the librarian, Madam Pince, successfully silenced him. The two boys turned back to sorting through the stacks of books piled around them.

After what could easily have been hours with their noses in dusty books, they were interrupted by an eerily recognizable, "Hem, Hem."

The breath caught in Harry's throat and Ron dropped the book he was holding, causing the pile beside him to cascade onto the floor. They both looked up to see Ginny laughing silently.

"That was just cruel, Gin," Ron stammered, slightly shaken. He looked over at Harry who was nevertheless grinning broadly at a blushing Ginny. The two were so clearly and completely lost in one another, noticeable even to Ronald Weasley. Hermione would have been proud.

Comprehension, at last. So, that was where Harry had been disappearing for the past few days. Wordlessly thanking the heavens that he'd been spared having to find out by catching them in the act, Ron decided to do without the "big brother" act… For now.

Instead, he opted for the stern trademark Weasley visage at both of them, conveying that he wasn't going to be fooled _that_ easily.

His expression knocked the smile off Harry's face instantly while Ginny looked poised ready to enter into a full fledged sibling battle right there in the library.

"Relax, both of you," Ron sighed. "Just don't do it in front of me and we'll be fine."

Harry eased visibly… as it turned out, however, too soon.

Ron turned to him, with a finger raised in his direction, he added, "And you… you'd better not find yourself 'falling asleep in the library' again, get it?"

Nodding vigorously, Harry gulped. His wide eyes shifting from Ron's fiercely pointing finger to Ginny, who was fighting a grin.

Ron lowered his hand seeing that he had garnered the reaction he'd been going for.

"Now, that is settled… anyone else hungry?"

Harry groaned aloud, rolling his eyes. 'It could have been much worse,' he reasoned to himself.

* * *

The door to the Hogwarts kitchens flew open as four raucously laughing boys hurled themselves inside the safety of the hidden room and collapsed onto the floor. 

They each struggled to catch their breath, ragged from a combination of running through the school corridors and their ferocious laughter.

"Close it, Wormtail! Hurry!"

The door slammed shut behind them.

"That was a close call, eh?"

"I thought Filch had our number that time, Padfoot!"

"Did you see the look on Malfoy's face?!"

"Did I? I've never seen him smile before? It looked genuinely painful for him."

Gasping for breath, Sirius stood, brushing himself off. "Well, whoever thought of that Tickling Charm is a genius in my book," he laughed.

James pulled himself to his feet as well and smiled broadly. "I believe, Padfoot, that it was your brilliant plan."

Sirius cupped his chin in feigned contemplation. "You know, Prongs? I believe you're right. I'm too gifted for my own good, if you ask me."

"Then it's a good thing no one asked you," chuckled Remus, as he too stood up. "Heaven forbid, you begin to think highly of yourself."

Sirius erupted again in his characteristic bark-like laugh, throwing his arm around Remus' shoulders.

"Moony… you'll be pleased to hear that your sarcasm did not go unnoticed."

With an obvious look to James over his shoulder, Sirius continued, "And as long as we're discussing things that did not go unnoticed... Prongs? Wormtail? Did either of you happen to observe that Moony here, let a certain Ravenclaw sixth year pass through the corridor unaffected by our exceptional Tickling Charm?"

Remus' face immediately flushed bright crimson.

James put on a shocked expression. "He didn't! This couldn't have been the same young lady he stared at all through dinner?"

"If by 'all through dinner', you mean, all through every meal for the past month, then yes. The very same young lady, indeed!" Sirius persisted, barely containing himself.

Blushing furiously, Remus finally cracked.

"Alright, alright… I let her bypass the Tickling Charm," he confessed.

"And they say chivalry is dead!" James teased. "Our Moony is quite the gentleman."

Remus grinned wryly, "It must be the wolf in me… I sure didn't learn it from you mangy beasts."

His three friends were all but rolling on the floor in hilarity.

"We're the mangy beasts? The werewolf calls us mangy?!" Sirius exclaimed, struggling for breath from laughing so hard. "Be careful there, Moony old pal, your sarcasm may get you into trouble one day."

"You win this round, Moony," James yielded finally. "But I think we're letting you off lightly, considering."

"Yeah Remus, you sound like Evans, anyways!" Peter piped in.

The four friends sobered promptly at the mention of Lily. Three pairs of eyes turned to James.

Peter, afraid that he'd upset his friend, rushed to explain himself. "I mean… it's just that she always says –"

"That we're self-absorbed prats with no regard for anyone in this school besides ourselves?" James interrupted.

"Well… yeah," answered Peter slowly.

The boys exchanged glances amongst themselves and exploded in laughter again. Peter joined in cautiously after realizing that his remarks were forgotten.

"Evans can say what she wants about our supposed _shortcomings_," James said through his laughter. "Hermione and Callie don't seem to mind us too much, eh, Padfoot?" He nudged Sirius with his elbow.

Sirius' smile faded for the briefest of moments, but just as quickly, he was laughing again, though it sounded slightly forced to the heightened hearing of the werewolf in the room.

Remus and Sirius' eyes met and a silent communication passed between the two friends.

Quickly changing the subject, Remus spoke up loudly, "Well, since we're here, why don't we have the school elves fix us some food? Merlin knows how long we'll be hiding from Filch until he gets one of the Professors to reverse that Tickling Charm."

James agreed, waving a hand in the air gallantly, flagging down the nearest elf. "A feast for my friends, good Sir!"

As the Hogwarts elf scurried away to prepare a meal fit for the kings of the school, all that could be heard through the ensuing laughter was Remus' good-humored voice claiming, "Evans may just be onto something… you _are_ a complete prat, James."

* * *

That night, Ron, Harry and Ginny were still holed up in the library. They were now regulars there in the late hours of the evening. So much so, that Madam Pince had even allowed the three of them to begin taking meals at one of the back tables, knowing that their research was of the utmost importance.Harry rubbed his eyes wearily. His energy levels were still not normal… he was tired all the time and, despite greatly enjoying his recent trysts with Ginny, in all honesty, he definitely was not feeling top notch. 

"Alright, Harry?" Asked Ron, looking over the top of his parchment.

"Fine," he lied. "Just –"

"Tired, we know," Ginny finished, looking at him with concern. "I just don't understand why none of Madam Pomfrey's potions are helping."

Harry just shook his head in annoyance. "I haven't the faintest idea… but I sure hope the answer lies somewhere in one of these books," he said sarcastically.

Their research was becoming a vicious cycle of monotony and a colossal waste of time. They couldn't make inquiries as to potential horcruxes without Hermione's help and they couldn't get that unless they found a way to bring her back. The more books they read, the more futile their search seemed.

Ginny reached across the table and laid her hand on Harry's arm. "Do you want to go back to the hospital wing or at least back to your room to rest?"

"No," He said. "Thanks but I'd really feel better if I kept on here."

They each reluctantly turned back to their work.

Without looking up, Ginny reached across the desk to retrieve a spare roll of parchment, knocking over one of the smaller piles of books in the process.

"Damn," She cursed in a hoarse whisper, kneeling down to pick up the fallen items. Tossing them half-heartedly back onto the table, she suddenly paused mid-throw and gasped.

Ron and Harry both jumped up to see what had caused Ginny's reaction. They both leaned down beside her as she was still knelt down, cradling an open book in her arms as she scanned the words at lighting speed, her brow furrowed.

"What is it, Ginny?" Ron asked eagerly.

She held up a finger, signaling him to wait a moment while she finished.

He and Harry shared an apprehensive look and waited. Finally, she stopped reading and looked up at them.

"I think I may have figured out what is causing the flashbacks!" She said excitedly.

She stood and placed the open book on the desk and began to recite aloud from the text.

"One of the many mysteries of Hogwarts Castle lies within the school's very walls. For well over a thousand years, students have come to receive their education in magic from the world renowned institution. Over the years, it is believed that the Castle has absorbed an inordinate amount of the excess magical power that is created within, enlivening the very structure itself and allowing it a certain degree of awareness. In other words, there are magical imprints throughout the school, connecting memories of students and teachers past and present creating a divine web of history unique to Hogwarts, and Hogwarts alone."

Ginny finished reading the passage and looked up at Harry and Ron.

"But what does… I mean, how does that explain..." Ron wasn't exactly sure how to sort out this new discovery.

"I think, what it means," Ginny began slowly, "is that Hermione really is _here_, at Hogwarts. This 'web' that is described in the book has connected our memories with Hermione's… and is allowing us to sense her presence as though she were here with us now…. I think."

"But that wouldn't explain why I had a flashback to the wedding," Harry reasoned. This new information was already making his head ache.

Ginny shook her head, "No, I guess it wouldn't. Maybe there is more about it in here somewhere." She flipped through the pages as she spoke.

"What book is that anyways? Where did it come from?" Ron asked.

Ginny turned it over in her hands to look at the title. Before she said a word, Harry realized what it was.

All three of them looked down at the familiar, worn leather-bound book.

"It's Hermione's…. 'Hogwarts: A History'," Ginny said, with a sad smile.

Ron shook his head, "I suppose it's about time we put that one to use."

The three friends looked at one another solemnly, feeling Hermione's presence stronger than ever.

* * *

"James! You're never going to learn to fill out this star chart if you don't pay attention!" Hermione scolded, though she was smiling broadly at the handsome boy beside her. 

James twirled his quill in his hands nimbly, showing off his natural Quidditch skills.

"I have top marks in Astronomy, Hermione," he grinned at her. "Quit using my poor study habits as an excuse to get me alone."

Undoubtedly, his Quidditch skills were matched only by his aptitude for flirtation.

"In case you haven't noticed," Sounded a somewhat annoyed voice from across the room, "You two are hardly alone."

With one final flip of his quill, James turned in his seat at the familiar tone.

Sirius was seated at one of the study desks, a length of parchment stretched out in front of him, his quill paused mid-scrawl.

"Can't you write your love letters elsewhere?" James quipped to his friend in jest.

"I'm writing to my cousin, Andromeda," Sirius replied, his expression a confused fusion of a glare and a taunting smirk. "You know she and her daughter, Dora, hold the only claims to my undying affections."

At that comment, Hermione's head snapped up from her homework.

"But I thought…" she glanced between he and James. "I thought you were with Callie Truex?"

Transferring his gaze towards Hermione, Sirius said, "With?" As though daring her to define what she was implying.

Hermione shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "Yes, _with_. Umm… you two are… well, you're always –"

"Snogging one another's brains out in every bloody corner of the school?" Another familiar voice chimed in.

Three heads turned simultaneously towards the portrait hole where a fiery red head stood defiantly.

"Glad you noticed, Evans," Sirius said blankly, looking back down at his letter. He was not in the mood to try to get a rise out of the Head Girl, easy as it was.

James looked over at his best friend curiously. It was unusual for him to pass on the chance to rile Lily up. She, too, seemed taken aback by his unreceptive attitude.

"It's hard _not _to notice, Black," she stated simply, his lack of a rebuttal left her nothing with which to counter him.

The room fell silent while, James watched this oddly passive-aggressive exchange with great interest.

Realizing that Lily wasn't going anywhere, he spoke up. "Did you have anything else to add to your brilliant insight, Evans?"

Lily rolled her eyes to the ceiling and turned away from James to look in Hermione's direction. With a small forced smile, she said, "Professor Dumbledore asked me to tell you that he'd like to meet with you again next week at the same time."

Hermione hadn't heard. She was busy scrutinizing Sirius who was deliberately focused on his letter.

Lily cleared her throat in an unsuccessful attempt to get her attention. She raised an eyebrow at James who was looking on, puzzled.

"Hermione?" Lily said, louder yet.

The brown haired girl looked up, hearing Lily for the first time.

"Sorry. What was that, Lily?" Hermione said blushing vaguely, looking round at James as she realized she'd been caught staring at Sirius again.

"Professor Dumbledore would like to meet with you again next week. Same time," Lily repeated, an amused expression dancing across her face.

"Oh. Ok, thank you, Lily," Hermione replied quickly.

Sirius was still ignoring their conversation, concentrating determinedly on his writing.

The Head Girl's amusement was now apparent and its meaning was not lost on James. Lily's communicative raised eyebrow arched ever higher… infuriating him for he knew precisely what it was she found so humorous.

Never one to allow himself to be one-upped by Lily of all people, he flared up at her with the first words to come to his mind.

"Well, Evans, unless you are stalling about attempting to be seen in our presence, you'd best be running along. Hermione and I have plans… and I'm afraid there isn't room for a third party, if you catch my drift."

A spiteful wink in her direction and her face instantly transformed from delight to fury.

Red with anger, Lily spun on her heel and marched towards the stairway to the girls' dormitories. Only those with very sensitive hearing could have heard her mutter an incantation in barely more than a whisper while waving her wand nimbly over her shoulder as she disappeared around the landing at the top of the stairs.

"James, that was cruel," Hermione reprimanded him, in a manner that reminded her immediately of the way she would speak to Harry and Ron. She wasn't entirely sure that Lily had deserved that retort from him.

"Eh, she had it coming," James said, trying to convince himself of that very thing. In fact, he, too, was perplexed that he'd been so blatantly rude to Lily. But her silent insinuation that Hermione had been focusing on Sirius and the triumphant smirk on her face had infuriated him.

'The nerve of her… just who does she think she is?' He speculated to himself.

He took a deep breath and turned his attention back to Hermione. "Let's just finish these star charts," he decided. "Then… possibly, we could see to those 'plans', I mentioned to Evans?" He hinted to her.

She simply smiled and blushed, pulling her nearly completed star chart towards her so she could fill in the few remaining blank spaces.

Taking his seat beside her once again, James too reached for his parchment and quill in order to finalize all of his responses as fast as he could… the tempting thought of exploring _extra-curricular _activities with Hermione motivated him to concentrate.

Across the room, Sirius grimaced at the thought. He wasn't sure how long he'd be able to put up with James' advances toward Hermione. Forcing the image of the two of them… together… out of his mind, he quickly put the finishing touches on his letter.

A few moments of silence passed before James announced loudly, "Done!"

"I just need one more moment, James," Hermione said, completely immersed in hastily finishing her work.

But her concentration was interrupted only seconds later by an outburst from James.

"What… what the hell?!" He yelled in total bewilderment, flailing his hands in the air and waving his parchment and quill wildly about. "Hey!"

His shouting did not cease as he continued to gesture violently about the room.

"The paper is stuck to my hand… and my quill… it won't come off!"

He pushed off his chair with his parchment burdened hand but found that the chair too became bonded to his skin.

"Ow!"

Hermione, jumping up from her forgotten homework, reached out to stop him from wielding his quill like a weapon but he jerked his hand away.

"No, I'll get stuck to you too!"

Sirius looked up at the pair, fighting the smile that threatened to crack his serious expression.

"I guess that'll put a damper on your _plans_, eh Prongs?" He said in mock sincerity.

James shot him an accusatory glare but Sirius held up both hands proclaiming his innocence.

"Don't look at me!" Sirius said honestly, then with a jerk of his head indicated the girls' staircase.

Realization dawned on James and he sent a deathly glare in the direction of the female dormitories.

"Dammit, Evans!" He shouted heavenward.

Sirius chuckled despite himself, fighting the urge to spout off a dozen puns involving the phrase, "sticky situation" and the like.

He stood and rolled up his parchment. Waving his wand over the paper, it sealed itself, and he threw it in his bag.

"Well, I'd love to stay and chat but it looks like you'll be _stuck_ here for a while and I have _plans _of my own with Callie," Sirius said, unable to completely abstain from a couple of jabs.

"Sirius, help me!" James begged.

Hermione was still trying to calm him down so he'd keep still. "Just stop moving for a moment so I can try a counter-spell!"

But James' uncontrolled motions caused his quill-bearing hand to become magically glued into her already unruly hair.

"Ahh!" Hermione cried out in pain. "Stop pulling, it hurts!"

Sirius watched for another moment before walking towards the portrait hole.

"You aren't really going to leave us like this, are you, Padfoot?" James asked incredulously.

After a moment's contemplation, Sirius' eyes landed on Hermione, whose face was wrenched in pain from James tugging at her hair, and said, "Sorry, can't keep the fair Callie waiting, can I?"

With that he stepped through the portrait hole, leaving James and Hermione behind to gape at one another in disbelief.

* * *

**Read and Review! Thanks everyone!**

* * *


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

This story is so much more fun to write when I know there are people out there eager to find out what happens next. So, thank you to those who took the time to share your thoughts with me.

**A/N: **I've recently written a few Severus/Lily one-shots. If you are so inclined, head over and read them… and review them too!

**Chapter Eleven.**

* * *

"So, finally, Alice came in and performed the counter-spell," James explained to an attentive Remus. "But by that time, my parchment was ruined and a chunk of Hermione's hair had been ripped out!" 

Remus surveyed James for a short time… biting his bottom lip to keep from laughing. James noticed this and flared up again.

"Why are you laughing, Moony?! Sirius just left us there… to go meet a girl! He's in breach of the Marauder's Code."

Now Remus was laughing full out.

"James," He laughed. "First off, there is no such thing as the Marauder's Code."

"Well, there should be," James grumbled under his breath.

"And second, what exactly would you propose I do about the situation anyways?" Remus asked.

James gaped at his friend in disbelief.

"So, you think it's alright that he left me stranded after being hexed by Evans?"

Remus smiled placidly.

"No, I don't think it was _alright_… but I do think it's bloody hilarious."

Seeing James open his mouth to argue, Remus hastened to continue.

"But, Hermione is a bright girl. I'm sure Sirius assumed you two would be able to reverse the spell in time… on your own."

"In time, is right. We were stuck like that for nearly an hour!"

"There is no sense in being angry at Sirius. If it were he who had been stuck to Hermione, you probably would have left them too," Remus pointed out in his classic logical manner.

"Well, I'm not so sure he would have minded being stuck to Hermione," James said deliberately.

Looking over at James sharply, Remus asked, "What do you mean?"

"It's just that I get the impression that… if he didn't have Callie then he might-"

Remus, though, attentively as he was listening, did not get to hear the rest of James prediction, for at that moment, the portrait swung open and Sirius Black sauntered into the nearly empty common room.

"Prongs, my friend!" Sirius greeted him pleasantly. "How lovely to see you without your entourage. Hermione and that chair were most distracting!"

James looked at Sirius reproachfully.

"You arse, Padfoot! I can't believe you left me like that!"

Sirius smirked at James, ignoring the glare he was receiving.

"This is the thanks I get for leaving you alone with a beautiful girl in a compromising position?"

James furrowed his brow in confusion.

Sirius raised an eyebrow in question and went on, "Don't tell me that you were, more or less, trapped with Hermione… all alone… and it never occurred to you to… well, if I have to explain all this to you-"

"Padfoot…" Remus warned, giving Sirius a cautionary look.

"Alright," said Sirius, abandoning his taunting of James. "I apologize, Prongs. But I did have to rush off… unlike me, Callie is not best friends with the Head Boy, and has to be back to her common room by curfew, which meant that we had to make the most of the time we had."

He gave his friend a hopeful smile, which James finally returned.

"Don't think I won't get you back for this one," James informed him with a grin. "And don't think I'm going to be nice and spare your girlfriend either."

"Girlfriend?" Sirius objected at once. "Let's not start spreading vicious rumors, eh? That's just cruel."

The friends started laughing and soon enough, all was forgotten.

Remus joined in their laughter with great relief. He was not interested in playing referee between his friends, especially, when he had an inclination that there was more to Sirius' behavior earlier than he was willing to admit.

Deciding to spend the rest of the evening conspiring with his best friends rather than studying, he began packing up his things when he noticed something gold stuck in one of the pockets of his book bag.

He reached down and pulled the item out, turning it over in his hands he realized it was a Honeydukes chocolate bar… his favorite. But he'd finished off his stash weeks ago he knew, and with his heightened senses, there was no way he could have missed this bar, stuck inside his bag.

Still looking at the gold-foil wrapped chocolate in his hands, he spoke up to James and Sirius, "Did one of you put this in my bag?"

The two boys looked at him incredulously.

"Honestly, Moony," James started. "If we were going to slip something into your bag without your knowledge, what are the odds it would be an unassuming bar of chocolate?"

"Good point," Sirius added in agreement.

Remus did not answer but took a closer look at the wrapper of the candy bar. There was something written on the label in an unfamiliar script:

"I owe you one."

Remus repeated the message aloud. James and Sirius stopped mid-conversation; they'd been plotting how to charm the mirrors in the girls' bathroom to insult anyone who looked into them.

"Who owes you one?" James asked with great interest.

"No idea," Remus answered plainly, handing the chocolate bar to James, who read the cryptic message aloud before handing it to Sirius.

He, too, read the note out loud, a wide smile and realization crossing his face.

"Well, well, well," he mused. "It seems Moony has a secret admirer."

Remus, genuinely taken aback, could only repeat his friend's words. "Admirer?"

"Why would someone 'owe you one', Moons?" James asked again.

Ever the knowledgeable ladies man, Sirius answered for him.

"Does the name Nadine Westmere mean anything to you?" Sirius said, goading his friend.

Remus flushed and his stomach did a somersault.

"I… I let her by the Tickling Charm…" he gulped.

"That Ravenclaw girl?" James asked. "Nice work, Moony! She's one of the best looking birds in the sixth year."

"Yeah, she's pretty… umm… pretty," murmured Remus, still looking intently at the chocolate bar as though it would disappear at any moment proving to be a cruel joke played by his friends.

Sirius and James grinned proudly at Remus. It wasn't uncommon for girls to notice Remus, he was certainly one of the most popular boys in school, this was different though. Most girls would admire him from a distance, giggling as he passed them in the corridors… a wasted effort; for Remus was far too shy to approach any of them, even if he wanted to.

But Nadine Westmere had bypassed the customary route and taken the necessary initiative.

After a few more moments of quiet contemplation and incredulity, Remus stood and said he was going to bed.

He gathered his things and headed to the boys stairs, his mind already racing to guess when he would see Nadine again and find out if it was, in fact, she who had left him the chocolate.

As his foot reached the top step of the staircase, his friends below in the common room called out to him.

In unison, James and Sirius spoke loudly in a hyperbolic mock feminine tone.

"We owe you one, Moony!"

* * *

"I'm counting to five then I'm coming in so you both had better be fully clothed and on opposite sides of the room," Shouted Ron from outside the door of Ginny's rooms. 

His bellowing did not seem to garner any sort of response from within so he continued.

"Alright, I'm counting! Five… Four… Three… Tw – "

The door swung open and a bathrobe clad Ginny lunged at him, covering his mouth.

"Have you lost your mind, Ronald?" She asked him disbelievingly. "It is after midnight!"

Yanking her hand away from his face, Ron responded in the most big-brotherly voice he could manage.

"Exactly my point, _Ginevra_. Harry was supposed to be back in our rooms at midnight. He never showed… so here I am."

"Oh grow up, Ron!" Ginny scolded him as she turned and walked back through the door, waving at him, indicating that he follow her.

She turned and placed a finger over her lips to silence any further outbursts from her brother.

"Harry's sleeping," She whispered, pointing at the soundly sleeping dark-haired boy on the sofa.

Ron raised his eyebrows suspiciously.

"Oh come off it, Ron," Ginny said, shaking her head. "You know how exhausted he's been. He fell asleep and I wasn't about to wake him. He needs the rest."

Ron conceded with a nod. He sank into an armchair with a concerned look on his face that could only have been inherited from his mother as he watched Harry sleep.

"Did you guys find anything else in 'Hogwarts: A History' that explained about the flashbacks?" He asked in a hushed tone.

Ginny sat in a chair across from him, holding a mug of hot tea with both hands.

"Well," She said taking a slow sip of her tea. "I was thinking… if Hermione's memories are imprinted within the school's own memory, then… maybe, if we knew what happened to her while she was there… or here… at Hogwarts, I mean… well, it may help to explain the connections, the flashbacks... What do you think?"

"It couldn't hurt," He said in agreement. "But how are we going to get that information when McGonagall is dead set against telling us anything?"

"We get Remus alone… that's how," Ginny said firmly. "I know that Dumbledore hadn't wanted them to tell us anything but the fact is… Dumbledore is gone. And the answers lie with only those who were there."

The siblings looked at one another and then to their sleeping friend. Each silently praying that by the time they had all of the pieces of this puzzle, it wouldn't be too late to help him.

They sat in silent contemplation, watching the fire die down slowly. Before long Ron's eyelids began to grow heavy with exhaustion. He rose out of the chair and nudged Ginny who had dozed off in her own armchair. She yawned and stretched her arms above her head.

"Goodnight Ginny," He said quietly, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

"'Night Ron," She said sleepily.

She heard the door close gently behind him.

Ginny rubbed her neck which was already slightly stiff from reading all day and now from falling asleep slouched in the armchair. She moved over to where Harry was still sleeping peacefully.

As much as she hated to wake him, she knew his legs would be horribly cramped in the morning from sleeping all night on the too short sofa.

She gently shook his shoulder.

"Harry," She said his name sleepily.

Kneeling down on the floor beside the sofa, she leaned closer to his ear.

"Harry," she repeated.

He stirred slightly but did not open his eyes. She nudged him again and kissed his forehead.

"Wake up, Harry," She said once more.

Harry did not open his eyes but he wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her closer.

Ginny smiled and swatted at him. "Have you been awake all this time?" She laughed.

"No," Harry said tiredly. "Just long enough for your unassuming brother to leave."

Her giggle was stifled when he tightened his grip on her and pulled her down, his lips meeting hers in a slow, indulgent kiss. Harry was certain that nothing in the world could feel so wonderful as waking up to this beautiful girl, and he kissed her more deeply still, taking advantage of the privacy.

Their kiss slowed and they parted. Ginny stood, taking Harry's hands and pulling him upright.

"Come on," She beckoned. "Let's go to bed."

Harry allowed her to lead him into the adjoining bedroom where they both crawled under the covers, Ginny automatically cuddled closer to lay securely in his arms.

Gripping her waist with his hands, Harry pulled her until she lay atop him and he kissed her again. He ran his fingers through her hair, as she pressed herself against him, trailing her lips gently down his neck.

In one smooth motion, she pulled Harry's shirt over his head, then untied the silk ribbon that held her robe closed.

Harry pushed the robe down her shoulders until it slid completely free of her. Running his hands up her arms, across her back and just enjoying the feel of her soft, warm skin against him.

He rolled over and raised himself so he lay over her. In a moment, Ginny had unbuttoned his pants, sliding them down over his hips slowly along with his boxers.

Harry pulled her panties down and tossed them aside, covering her body with his.

The way she made him feel and the anticipation of their intimate unions had not faded. If anything, it had increased ten-fold as he now knew the reality of the euphoria he could experience with her.

He kissed her again, giving way to their passion.

All he knew was that he never wanted to spend another day without her beside him. The two began to move together in time as she took his breath away.

* * *

The next morning before breakfast, Hermione walked through the corridors towards the Great Hall. 

She had gone early to see Madam Pomfrey for a hair re-growth potion to fix the bald patch created when James had pried his hand out of her hair. She couldn't decide which pain was worse… when she and Sirius collided into one another or this?

Regardless, Madam Pomfrey was growing increasingly irritated with her constant presence in the hospital wing, it _was _her fourth visit in just over a month. Even Harry and Ron hadn't spent this much time in the hospital and in addition to their reckless adventures; they were both on the house Quidditch team.

She shook her head at the thought… Hermione had no such excuse besides the fact that she simply seemed to find herself in these situations.

Her stomach groaned loudly in hunger as she quickened her pace down a staircase and through another corridor as she made her way downstairs.

As she neared another turn she heard soft voices and she stopped abruptly. They were coming from just around the corner, only a few feet away. She turned back, opting to take another route to the Great Hall rather than interrupt, when she heard a fragment of their conversation.

"That's not true," Giggled a female's voice. "Really?"

"It is," Replied a male. "There are certain cultures in the world where they believe that a kiss is the most intimate of acts. They think that when two people kiss, they momentarily share bits of each other's souls within their breath."

Hermione eyes widened as she recognized the words immediately.

Sirius.

Sirius had said those same words to her under the mistletoe when they kissed at Christmas during her fifth year. Theirs was a brief, chaste kiss… but it had sent her reeling at the time, she could still recall it vividly.

Though, Hermione was doubtful that there was anything chaste about his relationship with Callie. She realized that this line must have been one he'd always used with his female conquests.

Deciding against taking an alternate route, Hermione smirked as she rounded the corner spotting the couple only a few feet away. Callie's back was pressed against the wall and Sirius was leaning in closely, one hand planted on either side of her.

"Oh my!" Hermione said, louder than was necessary. "Don't mind me. I didn't mean to interrupt."

Sirius turned his head away from Callie and his mouth dropped open when he spotted the intruder.

"Close your mouth, Sirius," Hermione teased as she walked around them. "You wouldn't want any 'bits' of your soul to fall out."

Her smile faded slowly as she walked away. She shook her head again, trying to force from her mind the image of Sirius leaning dangerously close to the beautiful, blonde Ravenclaw.

Behind her Sirius Black was watching her retreating form in astonishment. He wasn't used to girls teasing him… or mocking his trademark "lines". Hermione Granger was absolutely and completely different than any girl he had ever encountered.

"Sirius?" Callie spoke up.

"Hmm?" He mumbled, still completely distracted.

"I said your name about four times, Sirius," Callie said dubiously.

"Did you?" He answered her vaguely. Craning his neck to look down the corridor to see if Hermione was still visible.

"I did," she confirmed, watching him with dwindling patience. "Are we going down to breakfast?"

"Yeah…" He replied, finally turning to face her again.

She beamed at him. Reaching up she pressed her lips against his languidly and he automatically returned the kiss… slowly at first but as the image of Hermione came to the forefront of his mind, he began to return the kiss with an increased fervor. He pictured Hermione beside him under a starlit sky, their lips meeting… and he completely let himself go.

"Siri- Mmmph… Sirius!" Callie pushed him back.

Sirius opened his eyes and looked down at her…for a moment he was puzzled to see Callie, and not Hermione, there before him. She grinned up at him sheepishly.

"If you keep that up," She whispered coyly, "we'll never make it to breakfast."

Sirius forced a laugh. "Yeah…I- I guess we should go."

"Come on," She said with a giggle, lacing her fingers through his as they walked towards the Great Hall.

All through breakfast, Sirius and Hermione avoided one another's stares.

Every time one of them looked away, the other would look up… like a breakfast table game of cat and mouse. Both of them were too busy adamantly ignoring the other to realize that their behavior was noticed by everyone around them.

"Hermione, are you still angry with Sirius for leaving us stuck together?" James asked curiously, hoping that were the reason behind their furtive glances.

She looked at him over her copy of The Daily Prophet.

"Of course, I'm not angry," She said sincerely. Then patting her head gingerly, she added with a chuckle, "Anyways, my hair has grown back so I haven't any reason to be upset."

James, Remus and Peter all laughed loudly at her comment… Hermione had looked fairly ridiculous with a bald patch amidst her curly hair.

Sirius just smiled quietly and observed his friends' laughter.

Then he watched Hermione until her eyes finally met his.

"I'm sorry," He admitted with a shrug.

Hermione nodded at him, "Thank you."

A split second later, she had disappeared behind her newspaper once more and Sirius had resumed eating his breakfast.

* * *

Harry, Ron and Ginny sat together in a booth at the Three Broomsticks waiting for the only person who seemed willing to give them the answers they needed. 

They sat in silence… meeting each others' eyes fleetingly, growing increasingly impatient.

He was late.

Ginny drummed her fingers upon the table, a full bottle of butterbeer sat before her, untouched.

The door of the pub swung open and the three friends swiveled around, looking up expectantly as a woman none of them recognized entered the room.

All three simultaneously turned their heads back to the table, and resumed waiting.

Ten minutes later, the door opened again, this time revealing Remus who pulled off his over-coat and strode over to their table.

"Sorry to have kept you waiting," He said, greeting them with a nod. "I had some urgent messages to complete for the Order."

"Is everything alright?" Ginny asked with concern.

"Yes, yes," Remus assured her. "We are keeping tabs on the known Death Eaters; trying to familiarize ourselves with patterns in their routines… it's all we can do until Voldemort decides to make a move."

Harry nodded, knowing that what Remus was actually saying was that they were waiting for him to finish off the Dark Lord, once and for all. But something in the back of his mind still nagged at him that Hermione would be the key in all of this… he needed her help.

"How's Tonks?" Ron inquired, changing the subject as he observed Harry's pensive expression.

A sad smile crossed Remus' weary face.

"She's just fine… I hear, she's fine."

Ginny looked up at him piercingly.

"What do you mean, you _hear_ she's fine," She said.

"I actually haven't seen her in some time," Remus admitted.

"But how – " Ginny began to question him further.

Before she could finish, however, Remus interrupted her.

"It just wasn't going to work," He said with a finality in his voice that meant this part of the conversation was over.

He took a slow sip of the butterbeer that had been waiting for him when he arrived, then he looked at Harry purposefully.

"Anyways, you need some information from me. Though, I suspect I already know what you're going to ask."

"Right," Harry answered. "We need you to tell us what happened while Hermione was in your time."

Remus nodded, having expected this.

"Yes. What exactly would you like to know?"

"Well, for a start, how did she get there?" Harry asked.

"I genuinely do not know the answer to that Harry. We believe that Dumbledore is the only person besides Hermione who knew what actually happened and he took that secret with him to the grave," Remus answered apologetically.

Harry looked down and nodded.

"What happened once she arrived?"

A faraway look passed through Remus' eyes as he recounted the memory.

"We found her on the Quidditch pitch. Your father, Sirius, Peter and myself. She was dazed and disoriented… she called your dad, 'Harry'. Now, I know why."

Harry smiled at the thought of Hermione meeting his dad.

"You were friends? With Hermione, I mean?"

"We were eventually, yes," Remus confirmed. "It took some time for Hermione to warm up to us all. We believed that she was a transfer student."

"And my mum? Was she friends with Hermione, as well?" Harry asked eagerly.

Remus looked away quickly, thinking how to phrase his response. He refused to lie to Harry but, nevertheless, phrased his answer very delicately.

"They were roommates, so they did spend quite a bit of time together."

Harry was not oblivious to Remus' deliberate wording.

"But they weren't _friends_?" Harry asked again.

"It's hard to explain, Harry. When Hermione turned up, she and James… well, they were very close. I can't say that your mum was entirely too pleased."

Ginny gasped and covered her mouth in shock.

Ron gaped at Remus and Harry dropped his butterbeer, the bottle lay on its side spilling across the table. Though, not one of them moved to clean up the mess.

"She… and my dad… they… what? They dated?!" Harry sputtered.

"In so many words… yes," Remus answered regretfully. He had known Harry would react this way.

Harry was appalled. He felt as though he'd been punched in the stomach as drawing breath suddenly became very difficult.

Therefore, Harry was grateful when Ron finally spoke up.

"Why would she do that?" He, too, was shocked.

Remus looked at them all remorsefully.

"I don't know, I'm afraid."

Suddenly Harry burst out angrily.

"How could she?! How could she knowingly keep my mum and dad apart?!"

He sat back in the booth, covering his face with his hand in an attempt to control himself.

Remus leaned across the table towards him.

"She was alone and confused, Harry. You know Hermione would never do anything to hurt you."

Ginny sat up straighter when Remus said this.

"And she loved you…" Ginny said, the idea just coming to her. "She loved you and you look just like your dad… right, Remus?"

Remus nodded slowly, gauging Harry's reaction to Ginny's realization.

The anger on his face wavered for a moment, but he just shook his head, refusing to acknowledge the observation.

"Remus," Ginny spoke up again. "If Hermione and Harry's dad were… together," she glanced cautiously at Harry when she said that word, "does that mean that… she could have prevented Harry from…"

"Existing?!" Harry summed up her thought heatedly.

"Hang on," Ron said, attempting to calm his friend. "Say, we find a way to bring Hermione back. We can keep anything like that from happening in the past, can't we?"

Remus shook his head.

"This is exactly why Dumbledore did not want us to tell you. Even if you managed to bring her back at this point, the consequences could be dire. I assure you, it is best that you let the situation run its course."

"Run its course?" Harry repeated, his voice laced with animosity. "You'd like me to sit back and wait while one of my best friends negates my entire existence?"

"Do you honestly think I would allow that to happen, Harry?" Remus asked firmly. "Hermione's relationship with James isn't what you are imagining it to be. There were outlying factors leading me to believe that all will be as it should be, in the end."

"What 'outlying factors'?" Harry asked.

"There was someone else involved..." He trailed off.

"Who?" Harry, Ron and Ginny all asked at once.

Remus leaned back in his seat.

"I think I've said enough," He stated quietly.

When Harry began to argue, Ron realized something and spoke up.

"Remus, if Hermione has changed the past… wouldn't we already know what the outcome was?"

Rubbing his eyes with his fingers wearily, Remus considered his question.

"That is very difficult to explain, Ron."

"Try," Harry asserted.

The older man scrutinized Harry for a moment before deciding that he did deserve an honest response. He drew a long, deep breath before launching into his explanation.

"Think of the timeline as a railroad track. When Hermione was sent back in time, the track split, forking into two separate paths, in a sense. One being the track that results in the present day, as we know it… the other is the changing past, a result of Hermione's effect on the timeline."

The three friends were silent, trying to take in what Remus was explaining to them.

"Therefore," He continued. "The outcome won't be revealed until Hermione's journey is complete and the 'tracks' come together once more, essentially."

"So, you can't be sure that Harry's parents will be together?" Ginny said, her eyes welling with tears.

Remus answered regretfully, "I'm afraid I can't be certain, no."

"You mentioned something about a note… when we spoke in McGonagall's office." Harry said quietly.

"Yes," Remus confirmed. "The implications of that note will not be known until Hermione returns, I'm afraid. But I sincerely hope that it accomplished all she intended it to."

When none of the three younger individuals had anything to add to the conversation, Remus reached for his coat and made to stand up.

Bracing a hand on Harry's shoulder he spoke solemnly.

"I hope I was right to tell you all this, Harry."

Harry nodded almost imperceptibly.

Nodding a goodbye to Ron and Ginny, Remus tossed a few silver sickles onto the table for his drink and walked out of the pub.

They were left at a table… the significance of all they had learned weighing so heavily upon them that there was no room for words.

Suddenly, Harry stood up from the table.

"We're going to find a way to bring her back. Timeline be damned."

* * *

James, Sirius, Remus and Peter walked out of their last class of the day, eager to spend some time outside in the fresh air before dinner. 

As they walked through the entrance hall laughing loudly at something Sirius was saying, they were spotted by a group of Slytherins, who followed them out of the castle.

The Marauders made their way across the grounds, ready to settle under their usual tree when a red spark rapidly flew past Remus' head.

Remus, Sirius and James each whirled around instantly, wands raised readily. Peter hovered a few feet behind his friends, peeking in between them.

Spotting the offender, James shouted, "Brave enough to throw hexes at us with our backs turned, are you, Lestrange?"

"Don't provoke them, Prongs," Remus said quietly. It was he they had sent the spell towards anyways.

"I would have thought by now you Slytherin lot would have come up with a new strategy besides cowardice," Sirius chimed in, spotting his younger brother, Regulus, among the group.

The three Slytherins began charging towards the Marauders and were met halfway, soon standing face to face with James, Sirius and Remus. Six wands held aloft, ready to duel at a moment's notice.

Out of the corner of his eye, Sirius noticed Peter's absence from their firing line. And spoke out of the corner of his mouth, in a low growl.

"Wormtail, if you don't scurry your rodent arse over here in two seconds, you will have a lot more to fear than these gits."

Peter quickly scampered from where he had sought refuge behind the tree and came to stand beside James, raising his wand shakily.

Once their fourth member had taken his place, James smirked arrogantly at their rivals.

"Looks like you three are outnumbered. Still care to take us on, do you?"

Damien McNair laughed maliciously and spat at James' feet.

"If you think we're afraid, you're sorely mistaken. Dumbledore's little pet Head Boy, the Blood-Traitor, and these two pathetic excuses for wizards?"

Sirius stepped forward angrily, they could say what they wanted about him but damned if he would stand by while someone spat at or insulted his best friends. He held his wand steadily, pointed directly at McNair's heart.

"Take. That. Back." Sirius whispered, his chest heaving with a barely controlled rage.

Regulus knew that look all too well, he looked to his friends who showed no sign of backing down.

Sirius forced his wand further into McNair's chest and repeated himself.

"Take. That. Back."

McNair did not speak but raised his wand menacingly to Sirius' throat. Eliciting a dangerous smirk from Sirius, showing he was not in the least, frightened.

Regulus broke first, trying to step between the two but was shoved back by McNair, who didn't take his eyes off the other Black brother standing before him.

Trying to convince his brother to walk away, Regulus intervened, "Oy, Sirius. It was a joke."

Sirius stared at McNair still, and said, "Well, I didn't find it very funny."

"Damien," Regulus tried again, this time attempting to appeal to his housemate. "Let's just go."

"But your brother wants to fight for his boyfriend's honor," McNair sneered. "Don't you, Blood-Traitor?"

"Don't call him that!" Shouted James, who stepped forward along with Remus.

"You going to take points away from us, are you, Potter?" Scoffed Rodolphus Lestrange.

He and McNair laughed aloud at their joke.

James, the taller of the two, glared down at Lestrange and snarled.

"What I'll take from you, I guarantee you will miss more than house points," He threatened.

"I think, however, their problem is with me, is it not?" said Remus. "Or was I merely the unassuming victim of your poor aim, Lestrange?"

Lestrange suddenly lunged towards Remus, and with a wave of his wand, shouted, "Levicor –"

"Expelliarmus!" Remus yelled before Lestrange could finish, his wand flew out of his hand and landed a few yards away in the grass.

James and Sirius laughed loudly at his dumbfounded expression as it became red with fury.

Regulus had already backed away, aware that he would lose any duel he was stupid enough to start with Sirius or his Gryffindor friends. Leaving McNair as the lone Slytherin challenger.

The four Marauders stood together glaring at him, waiting to see if he would even attempt to take all four of them on by himself. He wouldn't back down so easily though, it seemed.

Training his wand on Remus with malicious intent, he stepped towards him.

"You'll regret that, Lupin," He said, his face wrenched in anger.

Yards away, Lestrange was searching furiously for his wand in the grass but kept a close eye on the action.

"Looking for this?" Spoke up a brown-haired girl who had approached silently, bearing a knowing smirk and dangling his wand in front of her.

Rodolphus snapped his head up to look at her and nodded holding out his hand.

"Yes, that's mine," He said reaching for the wand.

She pulled it away before he could clasp it.

"Not so fast," she said looking past him at the Marauders and McNair, she watched as the Slytherin turned on Remus.

Moving at lightning speed, she waved Lestrange's wand and yelled, "Incendio!"

McNair's robes burst in flames all around him; he yelped in pain and backed away from Remus.

She arched an eyebrow haughtily at Rodolphus and tossed his wand away. He ran to snatch it back up from the grass, pointing it at McNair, he shouted, "Aguamenti!"

A flood of water burst forth from the end of his wand, drenching McNair as it extinguished the flames. He and Regulus sent one last glare in the Gryffindors' direction before turning and marching back towards the castle.

The water ceased as Rodolphus lowered his wand and followed after his friends, he paused in front of Sirius.

"You four just made a huge mistake," he warned them. Then, spinning around to face the girl who remained standing a short distance away, he added forebodingly, "You had better watch your back, girly."

She smiled and waved back at him.

"I'll look forward to that, _Rodolphus_," she said sarcastically.

James and Sirius laughed, shocked at her brazenness as Lestrange stormed away in the direction of the castle.

"What a bloody prick that guy was, eh?" She laughed, gesturing at his retreating back.

Still laughing loudly, Sirius nodded.

"That was some fine wand work," He complimented her. "Nadine, right?"

"Right. And you're Sirius Black," She said with a smile. Looking to the boy beside him, she greeted, "And you, I know, you're James Potter."

James smiled broadly, raising and eyebrow and glancing quickly over at Remus who was standing beside him, quietly witnessing the scene.

"I see my reputation precedes me," He said as he ran a hand through his messy hair.

She grinned. "Not so fast, Casanova. You _are_ Head Boy. Don't we lose house points, if we don't know who you are and address you as such?"

All four Marauders were nearly rolling on the floor in amusement. She was a feisty one, without a doubt.

Sirius struggled to catch his breath.

"I like you already," He finally managed to say. "Any girl who can set fire to a Slytherin and take James' ego down a few notches is alright by me."

Nadine laughed and turned to Remus.

He stepped forward with an outstretched hand.

"I'm Re – "

"I know who you are, Remus," She interrupted, speaking in a slightly softer voice.

He blushed and looked away, dropping his arm to his side. Attempting to ease his discomfort she held out her hand to shake his.

"Nadine Westmere," She said simply.

Remus smiled at her. "Pleasure," He said politely, still shaking her hand.

Peter chose that moment to run over.

"I'm Peter Pettigrew!" He squeaked at the pretty girl whose hazel eyes were still fixed upon Remus'.

She tore her eyes away from Remus and glanced over at Peter.

"Nice to meet you, Peter."

He opened his mouth to begin babbling incessantly to her, no doubt, as he did the same thing with every pretty girl he met. But before he could manage a word, Sirius spoke up.

"Well, I hate to run but humiliating Slytherins always works up my appetite. What do you say Prongs, Wormtail… dinner?"

He gave them both significant looks and jerked his head in the direction of the castle.

"Right!" James agreed ardently. Gesturing to his stomach, he said "I'm absolutely wasting away here. Let's go, Pete."

"See you at dinner, Moony. Bye Nadine… don't set fire to Remus now, I need to copy his Potions homework," Sirius called over his shoulder.

James grabbed the back of Peter's robes and dragged him off as he and Sirius started trekking back up to the school, leaving Remus and Nadine alone beside the Beech tree.

"That _was_ some nice spell work," Remus said quietly, agreeing with Sirius' previous compliment.

She smiled broadly.

"Thank you, Remus," She said confidently. "I guess we're even now?"

His mouth dropped open slightly… so, it _was_ her. He laughed to himself, half-shocked, half-thrilled.

"I suppose so," He said with a stunned nod.

She smiled at his nervousness… word around the school was that he was the quiet one of the "Marauders" but being as popular as he was, she would never have guessed that he would be so shy.

"Some fight that nearly was, huh?" She asked him, changing the subject.

Remus looked up at her, realizing something.

"You know," He said slowly. "I could've taken care of McNair on my own. I generally ignore them but…"

"I am positive that you could have… and would have," She answered sincerely. "But… can I be honest with you?"

Remus nodded.

"I just really hate that guy," She blurted out.

For a moment they just looked at one another before bursting out in hysterics.

When he finally caught his breath, Remus looked over at her.

"Dinner?" He asked with a grin.

She nodded, her eyes sparkling with mirth as they walked together towards the Great Hall.

Dinner had already begun when they walked in, the sounds of clinking plates and silverware along with the dull roar of a hundred conversations reached their ears before they had even entered the room.

They walked through the hall before parting ways with mutual smiles, as she left to sit at the Ravenclaw table and Remus sat one table over, with his friends and the rest of the Gryffindor House.

His friends were already animatedly relating the story of their near-duel with the Slytherins to everyone within earshot.

James was busy recounting Sirius' threats to McNair; making sure to mention several times that he had pointed his wand directly at the Slytherin's heart, inciting gasps of shock and awe from his attentive audience.

Hermione sat between James and Alice, listening to the story, but she stared at Sirius, her eyes wide and worry etched across her face.

Sirius looked up, about to insert more details to James' version of the story, when his eyes met Hermione's. Concern was apparent on her face and her eyes were filled with emotion, sending an unusual fluttering sensation about his stomach. They both hastily looked away from one another, forced to feign interest in the remainder of James' commentary.

Normally, this exchange between Sirius and Hermione would have been easily observed by the always perceptive Remus. But on this particular night, his thoughts were wholly engaged… concentrating on the sprightly girl sitting at the next table.

* * *

**Please Review!**

**New! **I've posted photos of Callie Truex and Nadine Westmere in my profile… check them out if you're interested.

Also, a very special thanks to Anasella Emm for being my proof-reader extraordinaire and helping me stay motivated. If you are a Draco Malfoy fan, she's started a new post-Deathly Hallows story starring everyone's favorite pure blood. I highly recommend it.


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

Once again, thank you for the reviews. You guys are AMAZING!

**A/N: **I was nominated for Best New Author at the Quill to Parchment Awards! A million thank you's to the anonymous person who nominated me. I was astounded and humbled. Thank you so very much.

**Chapter Twelve.**

* * *

"Is something on your mind?" 

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean… You've been so distracted lately, Sirius."

Callie watched him for a moment while he gazed over the grounds as they sat on a wooden bench near the greenhouses on the cool fall night, his arm slung casually over her shoulders.

"Sirius…?" She said trying to recapture his attention.

"Hmm? I'm sorry, what was that?" He asked, not having heard a word she'd said.

She shook her head and sighed.

"I was saying that you've been distracted lately."

A faint smile crossed Sirius' face as he seemed to recall something.

"Have I been?" He asked casually.

"_I_ think so," She answered with an ironic laugh.

She turned her petite body so she was facing him and studied him silently. He truly was devastatingly handsome… effortlessly so. As he stared out into the darkness, his eyes fixated on some distant point, she admired the way his hair fell naturally yet perfectly across his forehead.

Lucky, wouldn't even begin to describe what Callie knew her current position to be.

Any girl in school would kill to be sitting in her place at this very moment. But Sirius' recent apathy was not lost on her and while she may have been considered by the rest of the school as one of Sirius Black's "bimbos", Callie was, in fact, a very smart girl.

She reached over and laced her fingers through his, squeezing his hand and gaining his attention finally.

"Are you sure everything is alright?"

Sirius smiled passively at her, covering her hand within both of his.

"Of course," He said haughtily. "You shouldn't worry so much."

She snuggled a bit closer into his side and said sweetly, "Well, I wouldn't worry except that I've never known you _not_ to take advantage of darkness or solitude when we're together."

A suggestive smile graced her lips as she looked up at him.

Sirius furrowed his brow and gave her a sideways glance, considering his response. He ran his thumbs over her hand before making up his mind.

"Actually, Callie," He said decidedly. "I think I am going to head back in."

Her mouth fell open slightly, in shock at his sudden decision.

"Um, sure," Forcing a smile onto her face, she stood with him. "I think I have a Transfiguration essay to complete anyways."

They walked in silence back to Ravenclaw tower. As they reached the door, Callie reached up and kissed Sirius on the cheek before bidding him goodnight and quickly heading into her common room, her head lowered slightly in disappointment.

Sirius turned slowly and decided to let his feet carry him wherever they deemed fit. He knew this school so well that he simply surrendered control and allowed himself to wander aimlessly in his pensive state.

'Callie,' He thought to himself. Callie was extremely beautiful, an undeniable fact. But, in all honesty, he knew she was right. He _had_ been distracted as of late.

He couldn't help it. Every time he saw Callie, rather than appreciate her long, satiny blond locks; visions of curly hair and wry smiles danced through his head instead.

When he would kiss Callie, all he could envision were Hermione's expressive brown eyes… eyes that spoke volumes more than she would ever consciously divulge.

And the most infuriating thing of all was that Sirius knew what he had seen in those eyes the night they had shared under the stars while James was away.

Desire.

He was positive. She wanted him that night just as badly as he wanted her. Yet, she remained with James. The mere idea of the two of them together made him feel sensations that he had never experienced in his life. He couldn't even bring himself to say it aloud but… he was jealous. Jealous of his best friend and it sickened him.

He should have been thrilled that James had finally met a girl who cared for him after so many years of fruitlessly chasing Evans. But did it have to be the one girl whose mere presence made Sirius' stomach flutter in ways he'd only ever heard first-year girls giggling about?

Before too long, he found himself standing in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady who winked at him flirtatiously before asking him for the password. Sirius took a deep breath and attempted to void his face of any emotion that would give away his inner-turmoil should he encounter Hermione or James… or worse, both of them… together.

It was too close a call last time, when Lily's hex had caused his friend to become stuck to Hermione. Sirius had been compelled to lie that he had some sort of tryst with Callie in order to get away from them before he hexed James himself… purely out of frustration.

He forced his trademark smirk onto his face, recited the password and, once the Fat Lady had granted him access, he strutted into the common room. Looking around the room confidently, Sirius noticed a few stray underclassmen, all of whom watched him flatteringly as he entered. He ignored them and continued to scan the room.

In a cushy chair, far in the corner, Sirius spotted Remus, engrossed in a book that he held open in his lap.

Sirius flopped into the armchair across from the quiet werewolf in the corner and sighed loudly… the feigned smirk disappearing from his face instantly.

Remus glanced up over the top his book.

"Something wrong, Padfoot?" He asked as though he'd been expecting him.

Sirius combed his fingers through his hair and leaned back into the comfort of the chair, throwing one leg over the armrest. But he said nothing.

Closing the book and setting it on the table beside him, Remus rested his chin in his hand and turned his attention to his friend.

Of the Marauders, Remus was always Sirius' preferred confidant. James was his best friend and Peter was his chief devotee but when Sirius needed to vent or sought advice, Remus' quiet disposition and trustworthiness proved him to be the best choice.

Remus treasured his friend's trust and, therefore, was always able and willing to provide an ear to listen as Sirius voiced his concerns, though in this case, it appeared that he would have to initiate the conversation.

"Did something happen with Callie?" He asked, already anticipating the answer.

Sirius laughed bitterly and shook his head, staring out the window.

"No," He informed cynically. "Nothing happened with Callie. That's the problem."

Remus raised his eyebrows, not sure that he had understood.

"What do you mean?"

Sirius placed a hand over his eyes broodingly and tried to articulate his thoughts to his friend.

Speaking in his low, deep voice, Sirius began to confide to his friend the impasse at which he stood.

"I like Callie," He began, still searching for the right words to explain himself properly. "She's great… smart, funny, bloody gorgeous…"

"But?" Remus urged when Sirius trailed off.

"_But_… I can't be with her without thinking about… it's not that I want to… but I shouldn't…"

Sirius growled in aggravation at being unable to coherently express himself, eliciting stares from a few scattered students in the room. He paid them no attention as he sat up and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"I haven't felt like this before, Remus," He confessed in a subdued voice that was barely more than a whisper.

Remus knew instantly what Sirius was meant by his cryptic phrase. He, more than anyone else, had noticed the telling looks between his friend and Hermione though he hadn't expected him to actually admit it.

He ran a hand over his face and glanced around the room to ensure there were no interloping young Gryffindors within earshot.

"What about – "

"About Callie?" Sirius filled in angrily. "I don't know. Part of me doesn't even care."

"Yes, you do," Remus told him lightly.

"I can't be with her… I can barely be _around_ her," Sirius admitted, not acknowledging Remus' remark.

Remus smirked at him.

"Since when have you ever had any qualms about breaking up with one of your flavors-of-the-month?"

Sirius accepted the joke with a small smile.

"Touché."

"You have to tell her though, Padfoot," Remus pointed out.

"I know but… if I did… if I do... that means I am breaking up with her for…"

He paused to brace himself, admitting this out loud would only make it all the more real.

"…for Hermione," He finally uttered, followed by a relieved exhale. As unsettling as this situation was, he could not deny that it felt good to finally say it aloud.

Remus nodded, having suspected for quite some time that Sirius was harboring feelings for the bright witch. He remained silent though, willing him to work through some of this on his own.

Sirius stared at the floor, tracing the paisley pattern of the carpet with his eyes.

"I don't know what to do, Moony," He whispered. "Tell me what to do."

"You know I can't do that," Remus advised, though he truly wished otherwise.

The loud, boastful nature that his friend was notorious for was such a stark contrast to the Sirius who was currently sitting before him that Remus was nearly at a loss.

He had never known Sirius to have genuine feelings for any of the female students that always admired him so. None of them had ever posed enough of a challenge to really capture Sirius' attention… until Hermione had come into their lives.

"You really care for her," Remus stated.

Sirius nodded, his head still down.

"Are you going to tell James?" Remus asked pointedly.

Sirius raised his head so his eyes met Remus'.

"He's my best friend."

These were the words that had been replaying through his head for weeks now. Every time he tried to convince himself to ignore his burgeoning feelings for Hermione… for no other reason than to spare James' feelings.

"He's my best friend. I can't tell him, can I?" Sirius asked Remus. It was meant rhetorically but Remus heard the pleading undertones as though Sirius was hoping for his friend to grant him permission to make the choice they both knew was wrong.

Sirius watched Remus intently as he spoke, knowing full well what he would say before the words left his mouth.

"I'm afraid I can't answer that for you, mate," Remus said apologetically. "But I think you already know the answer."

Sirius nodded… that was precisely the response he had expected. Though, he fleetingly wished that Remus wasn't so damned righteous and would simply tell him what to do.

"I'm a bloody git, aren't I?" Sirius mused.

"Yes, you are," Remus agreed, with a smile. "But you were a git long before this happened."

Instantly, the two friends burst into alleviating laughter, both finding something therapeutic in the opportunity to laugh at such an incomprehensible situation.

Sobering from the brief expulsion of mirth, Remus gave Sirius a perceptive look.

"You are too good a friend to James to tell him. You and I both know that," He said meaningfully.

Sirius shrugged.

"How could I? His family took me in when I left home… He's my friend… my brother," He said in bitter acceptance. "Prongs would never… he would never do that to me."

He beat his fist into the armrest of the chair in resigned frustration… angry with himself for ever even considering harming his friendship with James.

"James is a fiercely loyal friend," Remus offered in agreement. "And so are you."

Sirius scoffed at Remus' remark.

"A loyal friend wouldn't – "

"What?" Remus interrupted, sensing a rant coming on. "Have feelings for a pretty girl completely against his will? Give yourself some credit, Padfoot… you haven't done anything wrong."

"Well, what am I supposed to do now?" Sirius mumbled, wondering whether or not Remus would still believe him to be innocent if he'd known about the brief kiss he and Hermione had shared.

"I suppose, now, you– Prongs!" Remus' eyes widened in surprise then he quickly shot Sirius a sharp look and jerked his head to a point over Sirius' shoulder.

Sirius' head shot up and he swiveled around. Sure enough, James was striding towards them across the room, grinning broadly.

Sirius tried to force all thoughts of Hermione out of his head as his friend approached them. He repeated his mantra silently to himself.

'He's my best friend. He's my best friend…'

James pulled over an ottoman from nearby and sat down between his two friends, the smile still plastered to his face.

"Merlin, it's a nice night out!" James exclaimed happily. "Wouldn't you both agree?"

He looked back and forth between Remus and Sirius jovially. Sirius had an oddly strained look upon his face while Remus just raised his eyebrows in amusement.

"You didn't accidentally take Euphoria Elixir again, did you, because last time Pomfrey was furious tha –"

James just laughed loudly as he cut in.

"No, Moony... I most certainly have not taken any potions."

"Then why, might I ask, are you grinning like an idiot?" Remus asked with a teasing laugh.

"Ah. Because, my friend, I have just spent an exhilarating evening with the lovely Miss Granger and you couldn't wipe this grin from my face, if you tried," James boasted in a joking manner.

Remus sneaked a quick glance at Sirius whose expression clearly threatened, 'Trust me, I'd like to try.' He quickly tried to think of something to say before Sirius decided to voice these evident thoughts.

Then, spotting Peter coming down from the dormitory Remus beckoned him over, shouting, "Wormtail!"

Peter jumped when he heard his name but hurried over to greet his friends and sat upon a second ottoman, eager to join in the conversation.

"What's going on!?" He asked excitedly. "Hey! I saw you and Hermione walking out by the lake, James!"

"Did you now?" James chuckled, nudging Peter in a telling fashion.

Peter smiled and nodded, thrilled to be a part of this inner circle.

"By the lake?" Sirius asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Indeed, Padfoot," Said James, anticipating Sirius' usual barrage of questions asking for all the details. But Sirius said nothing, he just looked out the window and glared in the general direction of the Great Lake.

Rather, it was Peter who chimed in, practically bouncing up and down in excitement.

"What happened? You kissed her?!" He squeaked.

James' grin faltered briefly and his face reddened a tinge.

"Well… no…," He answered.

Sirius looked away from the window and directly at his friend.

"You didn't?" He asked seeking reassurance… though James misinterpreted the look as shock.

"Err… no," James ran his fingers through his unruly raven hair in embarrassment. "We just talked really but – "

"So, you haven't kissed her yet?" Sirius implored him, his dark eyes shining hopefully.

Forcing a laugh to cover his slight awkwardness at not having kissed his… well, technically his girlfriend, James shook his head.

"Not yet, Padfoot. But you will be the first to know when I do," He concluded in the tone of their usual playful banter.

Sirius couldn't even attempt to hide the grin that spread across his face. He was elated at this discovery.

"You do that, Prongsie. You do that," He chided and they all laughed, even James eventually joined in.

Soon Sirius stood and stretched his arms above his head with a great yawn. He bid his friends goodnight and headed towards the boys dormitory, grinning like an idiot the entire way.

* * *

Two days later, Alice Bruneau marched into the Great Hall with her wand clenched in her fist, her face bright red with fury. Catching sight of her intended victims seated at the table, laughing amiably amongst themselves, she tore across the room and pointed her wand at each of them in turn. 

"Which of you did it?" She hissed threateningly.

Now, if faking innocence was a course in school, the Marauders would not only have achieved full marks on every exam but would have written the curriculum themselves. However, Alice had known the four boys far too long to allow their wide, naïve eyes and childlike expressions to fool her.

Alice turned and glared at James, breathing furiously though her nose as she always did when she was really angry. James unsuccessfully fought back laughter as he imagined her breathing fire from her flared nostrils like a Hungarian Horntail.

"What is so funny, Potter?" Alice snarled.

He stopped laughing at once. For a girl whose usual temperament was as gracious as could be, Alice could be terrifying when provoked.

"N- Nothing," He answered her, stuttering slightly when he noticed her wand rising steadily to his eye level.

She raised one eyebrow and studied him penetratingly as though searching for any sign of weakness. James resisted the urge to shrink down beneath the table away from her ferocious glare, instead he held her gaze as best as he was able.

After Alice seemingly failed to find a trace of guilt upon James' face, she turned to the boy beside him.

"Black," She addressed through clenched teeth. "Have you anything to say for yourself?"

Shooting her the most charming smile in his repertoire, Sirius leaned closer to her despite his misgivings about the wand she still held up ominously.

"Only that you look radiant today, Bruneau," He complimented her with a wink. "Have you changed your hair?"

"That won't work with me, Black, and you know it," She said as she glowered at him. "Now, which of you Marauding Morons put the Perma-Stick Jinx on Frank's broom?"

A few Gryffindor spectators snickered, including James, Sirius and Peter.

Remus, having perfected his blameless guise, merely sat and watched the scene unfold. Nadine caught his eye from the next table and he smiled at her mischievously, noticing that a number of Ravenclaws were also watching Alice with great interest.

"It isn't funny!" Alice protested, the volume of her voice rising dangerously. "Frank is in the hospital wing!"

Remus pressed his lips together as laughter threatened to explode from his mouth. The image of Frank Longbottom trying to dismount his hexed broom was painfully hilarious.

Sirius chuckled and smiled roguishly.

"Don't worry. Longbottom didn't lose his bollocks, did he?" He asked with a concerned pretense.

The surrounding crowd erupted with mirth and Alice's face turned from red to purple. James was sure that steam was going to spew from her ears at any moment.

Speaking very slowly, Alice leaned over Sirius treacherously and spoke very slowly in a controlled rage.

"No, Black," She spat. "He didn't lose any bollocks. But _he _didn't know how to reverse the jinx. How would you like to try and sit still while Madam Pomfrey removes a Perma-Stick Jinxed broom from your nether-regions?"

Sirius paled at the notion.

"That's what I thought," Alice surmised as she observed his reaction.

"But it isn't _us_ you should be angry with, Bruneau," James broke in.

Alice's eyes shifted to look at the Head Boy.

"Oh no?" She asked bitingly. "Then to whom do I owe the pleasure?"

James struggled to speak clearly, barely concealing his impending hysterics.

"We learned the Perma-Stick Jinx from… from Evans," He managed to get out before he burst into laughter along with a large portion of the Great Hall.

Lily, who was seated on the opposite side of the table, heard her name mentioned in the midst of what appeared to be yet another Marauder skirmish and she stood, craning her neck to hear what was said next.

"She ought to be more careful before she hexes one of us," Sirius laughed.

Alice just rolled her eyes.

"Well, no doubt, _you_ deserved it. Frank, on the other hand, hasn't done anything."

Sirius grinned at her again, which she found even more infuriating.

"Frank appreciates a good prank. Once all of his bits are healed, he'll be back in top form," He said confidently.

Alice caught Lily's gaze as the redhead came over to stand beside her and shook her head, they were both thinking the exact same thing.

"Prats," They scolded in unison before stalking out of the hall amidst a room full of boisterous laughter.

Hermione entered the Great Hall just in time to see Alice and Lily storm past her. She turned and watched them go before looking back towards the Gryffindor table with a suspicious raised brow.

The laughter was dying down as she approached James and his friends.

"Let me guess," She began with a smile. "You had nothing to do with that?"

As she pointed in the direction that Alice and Lily had gone, James wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her down into his lap.

"Us?" He asked innocently. "We were just sitting here minding our own business when – "

"When someone stole _your_ wand and hexed Frank's broom?" Hermione summed up, with a feigned innocence of her own. She may not have been a Marauder but she _was_ one-third of the Golden Trio… she certainly had a few tricks up her sleeves.

James gaped back at her.

"Er… yes?" He answered, waiting for another female-type outburst.

Hermione leaned in closer to him and smiled coyly, ready to whisper a response to him but before she could Sirius piped up.

"How did you know?" He asked, looking at her doubtfully.

Shifting in James' lap, Hermione turned to face the handsome teenager.

"I was in the library and saw Frank from the window while he was out flying… and when he tried to get off his broomstick… he… well…" She blushed as she struggled to find words to explain the scenario without having to name specific parts of the male anatomy. "Let's just say that the last thing I saw, was Frank walking awfully slowly back to the castle with the broom still held between his legs."

Laughter ensued once more as everyone pictured Frank in that precarious position.

"You boys are incorrigible," Hermione mused, trying to admonish them but failing miserably. It was impossible to even pretend to be stern when she was sitting on James' lap… and staring into Sirius dark eyes… twinkling with amusement…

Damn! She _was_ staring again. Cursing herself for succumbing to his gaze again, she turned her back to Sirius and focused all of her attention solely on James. Well… all of her attention that wasn't still lingering on about the captivating male sitting directly behind her.

"Have you completed your Potions essay yet?" She asked James, determined to force Sirius out of her mind.

"Not yet. But I'll have it done in no time," James smirked. He combed her curly hair behind her ear as he spoke a bit softer, "And after that, would you be interested in another walk by the lake tonight?"

She smiled tentatively and shifted from James' lap onto the bench beside him.

"I have to meet with Dumbledore this evening… but… after that, I would love to go with you."

"Excellent," James quipped. "Then, I shall meet you in the common room later tonight."

Hermione smiled and nodded.

"Well, with you for motivation I ought to get upstairs and finish this essay," James said gallantly. He stood up but paused suddenly. Then, quickly turning back he leaned down and kissed Hermione on the cheek before grabbing his school bag and walking away from the table.

Hermione blushed and bit her bottom lip. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Sirius look at her, so she busied herself by spooning some potatoes onto her plate. Her plan to stay as late as possible in the library so as to avoid being around Sirius had failed dismally.

For some reason beyond her own comprehension, whenever she was near him she was overcome by an urge to stare into his dark eyes. There was something about them that made it next to impossible to function properly. So, she chose to stare at her potatoes instead. Not exactly a happy medium but it would have to do if she were going to avoid being the girl with the "staring problem".

Across the table, Remus had caught Sirius' reaction to the brief kiss James had placed on Hermione's cheek. An array of emotions running the gamut from anger to defeat had crossed over his friend's face… but now, it had seemed to settle upon resentful.

An uncomfortable silence had taken over and Remus tried to rectify it by making conversation since it didn't appear that Sirius was up to chatting.

"So, Hermione?" Remus inquired. "You said you were meeting with Dumbledore? Is it to do with your school transfer?"

Hermione looked up sharply. She had been completely immersed in adamantly not looking at Sirius and had only caught the last bit of Remus' question.

"Transfer?" She asked with confusion.

Remus looked at her strangely and nodded.

"Yes, your move to Hogwarts? Dumbledore is helping you sort everything out, I assume?"

"Oh! Right. Transfer. Yes." Hermione spouted off words incoherently. "I mean… yes, he's helping me with the transfer, catching up on some different curriculum, and those sorts of things." She lied, trying to cover her blunder.

"You certainly don't seem to need any help with curriculum," Remus said genially. "Your exam scores speak for themselves, I think."

"Thank you, Remus. But, I suppose, there is always room for improvement."

Hermione smiled warmly at the young man, he truly was the most polite individual she had ever met and, she remembered fondly, he would remain the very same as an adult, as well.

"He's right," Sirius added succinctly.

Hermione refused to meet Sirius' eyes but looked at the table instead as she answered him.

"Thank you, Sirius," She responded quietly. "Um… I should actually be going to meet the Headmaster now. Er… Bye Remus. Bye… Sirius."

Hermione got up and began to walk towards the door, baffled that she could never seem to articulate herself properly in Sirius' presence. She was halfway to the exit when she realized she'd forgotten her book bag.

She turned around hurriedly and before she could take a single step, she ran headlong into a tall, firm structure. The momentum knocked her backwards off her feet and she began to fall when the structure's strong arms enveloped themselves around her, drawing her close.

Struggling to right her feet beneath her, Hermione clung to the arms wrapped around her. This structure smelled familiar… and its arms radiated a familiar warmth.

'Oh Merlin, please, no,' Hermione pled silently as she slowly looked up.

Sure enough, to her horror and her body's delight, Sirius Black stood gazing down at her. Though, absent from his visage was the classic smirk she had come to expect from him. In its place was an expression that Hermione could only describe as… affected. He seemed completely affected by their unexpected embrace.

"I was bringing your bag," He explained feebly, aware that he sounded like a pathetic arse.

But Hermione was blissfully _un_aware of this opinion. In fact, she was quite blissfully unaware of anything or anyone around them at that point in time.

"Thank you," She managed to respond breathlessly.

And once more, she was lost in his dark, penetrating eyes, as she remembered explicitly how they had looked under the night sky… reflecting the light of a thousand stars. Her body was secured flush against his as she felt the hypnotic rise and fall of his chest with each breath.

The sound of someone clearing their throat conspicuously brought both of them to their senses. Sirius let go of Hermione and she stumbled backwards putting a few feet of distance between them.

They looked up to see Remus and Nadine standing close by, Nadine looked highly amused while Remus eyed each of them with concern.

Sirius reached down and grabbed Hermione's book bag that had fallen and lay forgotten in their collision. He handed it to her and walked away without a second glance.

Hermione watched him go, and then with a small polite smile to Remus and Nadine, she too took her leave.

Five minutes later, she finally stopped in a quiet corridor to catch her breath from her hurried pace. Leaning back against the cool, stone wall, Hermione slowly sank down to the floor and hugged her knees close to her chest.

Apparently, Sirius wasn't the only one affected by their brief encounter. If her racing heart beat and still flushed cheeks were any indication... the interaction had had an effect on parts of her body that she didn't dare mention. She tilted her head back and shut her eyes tightly. She couldn't understand why James never incited such a reaction within her when all Sirius had to do was glance at her across a room or brush past her in the hallway to make her go weak in the knees.

Her feelings for James were genuine... of that she was sure. His companionship was immensely comforting and during their walks by the lake, they had engaged in some of the most meaningful conversations Hermione had ever experienced. This thing with Sirius was just a physical thing... inconsequential attraction. Nothing more. Probably just remnants of her juvenile crush on him years back... and seeing him here, now, in his prime had probably awoken some of those dormant feelings.

And on went the debate, triggering a familiar yet unwelcome dull ache in her head; the same headache she would get when faced with a problem that could not be solved logically. If the answer could not be found in a book, then it was likely that Hermione wouldn't be able to find the solution. Try as she might to find reason, these Marauders might just be her undoing.

Pushing all of these thoughts to the back of her mind, which was nearly full to capacity, Hermione dragged herself to her feet. Dumbledore was waiting for her.

She hurried once more along the well traveled path to the Headmaster's office. And before long, she found herself seated in front of the large wooden desk being studied by those seemingly all-knowing, crystal blue eyes.

They remained seated in silence for some time before Dumbledore began to speak.

"In our last meeting, Miss Granger, you shared with me that the last thing you remember before being transported into the past was reading an ancient book of a dark nature. Correct?"

"Yes, Sir," Hermione nodded.

"This book was found in the personal library of a friend?"

"Yes, Professor," She nodded again. "In Siri- I mean, in the home of my friend's Godfather."

Dumbledore looked down his nose at her from across his desk.

"Have you any idea where this book might be located today, in this time?"

Hermione thought for a moment.

"I would assume that it could still be found in the same location, Professor," She answered, hoping that he was not going to request what she believed he was about to ask.

As though he could hear her very thoughts, he continued.

"I am sure you realize, Miss Granger, that the retrieval of this artifact may provide clues that, otherwise, we may not find."

She hesitated.

"Yes... Yes, I understand, Sir," She said slowly.

"Thus, I must ask if you believe it possible to do so."

Dumbledore leaned forward, impressing upon her the magnitude of his request.

"Get the book?" She inquired quietly, speaking partially to herself wishing he had asked her to do anything but the seemingly impossible.

"Indeed," He answered simply.

Hermione swallowed hard. She couldn't go to Grimmauld Place! Grasping for straws, she tried the only excuse she could think of.

"Excuse me, Sir. But... if I am not to reveal my identity, that is... that I am from the future... then, how am I to gain access to the book?"

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled in a manner that plainly said he was already two steps ahead of her.

"Perhaps, if you thought on the predicament a bit longer you may find a suitable reason to ask Mister Black to grant permission for you to use his family's library."

If Hermione hadn't already been sitting down, she may have fallen and if it were physically possible for her jaw to hit the floor, it would have. She gaped in amazement at the white haired man seated across from her... flabbergasted.

"How... How did you..." Hermione shook her head slowly as she spoke, her eyes wide in astonishment.

The Headmaster leaned back in his chair and folded his hands upon the desk.

"While your information has been most useful, Miss Granger, I believe that I was able to reach a number of conclusions on my own. However, I must ask that you allow an old man his secrets in that regard."

Hermione began to apologize for her inappropriate questioning but stopped when she saw his amused expression.

"Yes, Sir," She accepted finally. The man knew everything... sooner or later she would fully appreciate that fact.

"Do consider it," He instructed her.

She nodded mutely. Dumbledore had helped her so much by attempting to resolve her situation that she knew already that she must do all in her power to accomplish the given task, as daunting and impractical as it may seem.

The formerly dull ache in her head roared to life with the addition of another dilemma. An undertaking of such impossible proportions as this made her wish she could simply stay in the past forever. In truth, the thought had crossed her mind on a number of occasions... usually occurring when faced with the reality that she would eventually have to leave her new life here behind. And for the first time, Hermione found herself sincerely considering the notion.

"Professor, may I ask you a question?"

The Headmaster nodded, eyeing her from behind his half-moon spectacles.

"What if, in the end, you aren't able to return me to my own time?" Hermione tried and failed to conceal the hopeful undertones in her voice.

Dumbledore's face softened.

"Have you a favorite tapestry among the many here at Hogwarts, Miss Granger?" He asked as though this was the most pertinent question he had asked all evening.

Hermione resisted the urge to roll her eyes, knowing that the Headmaster had his own way of reaching a solution so she thought seriously, contemplating an answer.

"I think the tapestry of Barnabus the Barmy is my favorite, Sir," She finally decided.

He smiled. "Ah, yes. I rather enjoy that one myself. Very intricate work goes into creating a tapestry. Would you not agree?"

"Yes, Sir," Hermione repeated for the umpteenth time.

Dumbledore nodded, apparently pleased that she was following him thus far.

"The threads in a tapestry weave together, over and under, criss-crossing, each one just as crucial as the next. I implore you to think of "time" as a tapestry. And the threads as the years of our lives; our past, present and future. Snag one thread and the entire tapestry is disrupted."

Hermione sighed deeply.

"I'm the snag," She said with poignant comprehension.

Leaning towards her, the elder man shook his head slowly.

"No, Hermione. Love. Love is the snag. It is far more powerful than you realize."

Hermione's first thought was the magical protection bestowed upon Harry by his mother but as that event had not yet occurred in this time, she thought grimly, she ought not to mention it. But she realized that Dumbledore was right. Love _was _tremendously powerful. A thought occurred to her.

"Can love be… dangerous?" She asked cautiously.

Dumbledore was silent for another moment, observing Fawkes preening his crimson tail feathers. When he looked back at the young girl, she perceived a hint of regret upon his visage.

"Not dangerous, no. But while it has the power to heal, it also has the power to corrupt and it has the power to persuade. Now, I do not know how or why you have been transported here but I do know that you are the thread that holds all the others in place. Much is depending on you right now. You know to do the right thing."

He had known precisely what she had been pondering... she couldn't stay here. She had to do the right thing. Everything depended on her... everything depended on her...

All the Headmaster had said became lumped together with everything that already weighed so heavily upon her and she began to feel dizzy. She had to get out.

She stood up quickly, a bad decision as it made her feel even more lightheaded. Blindly grabbing her bag, she apologized to the Headmaster before running out of his office and down the spiral staircase.

Hermione sprinted through the maze of corridors as silent tears began streaming down her face. Students stared as she passed in a blur and a few shouted her name but she never slowed down. She couldn't have stopped running now if she wanted to.

At last, she emerged onto the grounds through the front doors of the school, the cool air chilling her tear-stained cheeks and burning in her throat as her legs carried her far away from the castle that held too many memories and too much responsibility.

When she could run no more, Hermione collapsed onto her hands and knees on the far bank of the Great Lake and screamed... a desperate, guttural cry to the heavens yearning to alleviate some of her burden, some of her pain... and finally giving way to the body-wracking sobs, she wept.

It was all too much.

Dumbledore's confirmation that much was depending on her was not surprising... but the reality of the duty she had to the future and the sacrifices she must make in this time... it was too much. She would have to leave this all behind... leave behind the chance for happiness so her best friend could grow up without a family... so, the wizarding world could be plagued by the most evil wizard ever to have lived... and so she could be alone once more.

Her life was here... here she had love… she had James… and… Sirius... and if she did manage to change the future then perhaps there was a chance it would be for the better. There was no opportunity for her in her own time.

As Hermione further succumbed to the deep cathartic sobs, she distantly heard someone approaching but didn't care. And when she heard a soothing voice whispering to her and felt a hand pushing her hair gently off her sweaty brow just like her Mum had done whenever she was upset, she only cried harder.

After months of storing away her troubles this release was an exhausting and painful turn of anguish and soon, she was left drained and breathing roughly.

"Feel better?" Said a voice beside her.

Having forgotten that she wasn't alone, Hermione's head shot up. She gasped when she realized that the comforting hand and soothing voice belonged to none other than Lily Evans. She pushed herself up off the ground and rested on her knees, still watching Lily curiously.

"I… I'm sorry. I didn't know it was you," Hermione mumbled in an attempt to explain her behavior. She was mortified. Merlin knows how long she had been sobbing in front of Lily.

But rather than placing judgment upon her like Hermione might have expected, Lily smiled sympathetically though restrained.

"You didn't look like you should be alone," The redhead explained. "Do you feel better?"

Hermione breathed deeply and nodded.

"Actually, I think I do. Er… Thank you."

Lily nodded in return and the two girls sat in awkward silence avoiding meeting the other's gaze.

After a long stillness, Lily addressed her.

"Hermione?"

"Yes?" She answered, busying herself by brushing the acquired dirt from her robes.

Lily cleared her throat uncomfortably.

"Um… I know you probably think I hate you…," She spoke slowly, looking down at her fidgeting hands. "But, I want you to know that I don't. I don't hate you."

Hermione looked intently at the Head Girl through her red rimmed eyes, puffy from crying.

"I don't understand," She asked, too distraught to analyze the conversation in her head.

Lily furrowed her brow thoughtfully.

"I just felt you should know," She said shortly. After a brief pause, she added, "No one should have to feel alone."

Hermione looked out over the water… words weren't coming to her and she didn't know what she was expected to say.

"I'm not sure what to say," She said honestly. "Um… Thank you, Lily."

The two girls now stared across the lake. Hermione was mentally exhausted from crying though tears still threatened to spill down her face at a moment's notice.

Lily knew what had to be done and she summoned every ounce of courage she had in order to do it. She had to let him go.

"He cares about you," Lily said resignedly, her own eyes misting over now.

These words should have provided comfort for Hermione but at the moment she felt so lost and alone that their true meaning was completely lost on her.

"It doesn't matter," She whispered into the crisp evening air.

Lily looked bewildered.

"How can you say that?" She asked.

"I don't belong here," Hermione whispered, the desperation in her voice echoed in her brown eyes. "I'm not meant to be here..."

Lily sighed. As much as she hated the fact that James had seemingly chosen Hermione over herself, watching the desolate girl fall apart before her, vengeance was the last thing on her mind.

"Of course you are. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you to transfer here, away from your family and friends... but... I do know for certain that he would be enormously upset if you were to leave."

Hermione turned her glistening eyes to Lily.

"Sirius wouldn't care if I wasn't here... he has Callie..." Hermione answered sadly, her voice hoarse from crying.

"Sirius?" Lily repeated, total confusion written upon her face. "I was talking about James..."

Hermione realized what she had said and gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.

Lily stared back at her wide eyed, realization dawning across her face when she read the guilt projecting from Hermione's expression.

They both just stared at one another… neither having any idea what to say.

* * *

**Leave me a review telling me your favorite thing about Sirius Black. **

**Mine would have to be that devilish smirk of his...  
**

* * *

**A Bit More A/N:**

Thank you again to **Anasella Emm** for her motivation, ideas and being all around wonderful. Best of luck back to school and congrats on achieving your first day goal!

I've recently written a few Severus/Lily one-shots. One of them, _Within You & Without You_ has also been nominated for a Quill to Parchment Award for Best OneShot.

If you are so inclined, head over and read them… let me know what you think!


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **Thanks to Anasella Emm for being my sounding board this week and always!

Thank you for your reviews. They made me so happy!

**Chapter Thirteen.**

* * *

"Let me see if I can put my clever Ravenclaw skills to good use here," Nadine mused to Remus with a laugh. "Lily likes James…" 

"Correct," Remus nodded distractedly, reaching over to take her hand.

She squeezed his hand back and, with a smile, she continued.

"And James likes Hermione?"

"Right."

"And Hermione likes… James?" She asked with a quirked eyebrow. Remus was an impenetrable force when it came to secrets involving his friends so she eagerly awaited his response to see if it was possible to lure any information out of him.

Remus glanced at her, mirroring her quirked eyebrow.

"It would appear so," He answered with a smirk.

Nadine couldn't help but smile. He was good, she had to admit.

"So it would," She answered flirtatiously. "Moving on then, here's an easy one… Callie likes Sirius?"

Remus chuckled, "I'm positive there is not a single student or faculty member in the school who has not witnessed her… _like_… for him, first hand."

They both laughed aloud. Callie was certainly not shy about publicly displaying her affections for Sirius Black at every available opportunity.

"Well put," Nadine complimented him.

Remus grinned and leaned back against the tree under which he and Nadine were sitting. It was a chilly afternoon but the grounds were still busy with students keen to enjoy the weather before winter was upon them.

Sitting a short distance away were James and Hermione. James tossed a golden snitch from hand to hand, enthusiastically looking to Hermione after each catch to see if she had taken notice of his Quidditch skills. She put on a fairly convincing pretense of interest for the first few maneuvers but then became engrossed in a book and had ceased to pay attention to James' skillful show, much to the chagrin of the raven-haired boy.

Not far from them sat Sirius and Callie. Sirius was stretched out on his back upon the ground, his arms folded beneath his head as Callie marveled aloud her excitement about the forthcoming Hogsmeade trip in hopes that the gorgeous boy beside her was planning something special for the two of them.

Nadine leaned back against the broad trunk of the Beech Tree beside Remus. She could have easily wiled away every day like this one, spending time with the attractive Gryffindor was the most fun she'd had in recent memory. If she were the type to voice this revelation, which she wasn't, she would have found that Remus couldn't have agreed more.

As shy as he was, he relished in the comfort level they had established so quickly. They were so unlike one another, Nadine was feisty and dynamic whereas Remus was subtle and bookish, but they were both extremely intelligent and challenged one another with playful back and forth witty banter.

Nadine scooted closer to him and he ran his thumb back and forth across the back of her hand softly as he watched his friends.

Turning to face her, Remus asked, "I have a question for _you_ now."

"Let's hear it," Nadine smiled, always one to rise to the challenge.

"Why all the questions about my friends?" He posed.

She glanced over at the two couples nearby and thought inwardly for a moment.

"I would have thought that was obvious, Remus," She teased.

"Humor me," He said simply.

Nadine narrowed her eyes at him mischievously.

"Alright," She spoke slowly. "I was curious because if Hermione likes James and Sirius likes Callie… then _why_ can't those two take their eyes off one another?" She pointed discreetly from Hermione to Sirius and back.

Remus looked over at Hermione; she was holding a book so that it hid all of her face except her eyes… and she was clearly not reading at all. She was, instead, taking fervent looks at Sirius lying nearby and though dark his hair fell into his eyes, his head was plainly turned to the perfect angle that he might sneak glances over at the brown-haired witch.

It was… remarkably obvious.

He knew Nadine was waiting expectantly for a response and Remus contemplated how to answer her question. Sirius had confided in him and he would never betray his friends' trust, just as they had safeguarded his own secret all these years. But if he knew anything about Nadine, it was that she was as persuasive as she was beautiful… and that was truly saying something.

Attempting to deny his knowledge of Sirius' affections was his only hope.

"I'm not sure what you mean," He stated, avoiding eye contact. A hot flush was easing its way up his neck and across his face, a tell-tale sign that he was lying.

It was surprising then when Nadine did not do as he expected. Rather than pushing him to provide further information, she, instead, emitted a throaty laugh and leaned into him as she succumbed to the hilarity.

Remus watched her as though she were mad.

"I've missed something," He said cynically.

"No," Nadine was fighting her laughter. "Its just… Remus…" She was unable to catch her breath just yet and fell back against the tree laughing harder still.

"Whenever you're through…" Remus smirked.

Taking a few deep, sobering breaths Nadine finally regained her capacity for speech.

"Remus," She began again. "It's just that if I had a vague inclination that something was going on between those two before… well, your reaction just confirmed it."

Remus' eyes widened. "What…?"

"Merlin, Remus! You're a terrible liar," She joked.

He chuckled in response and nodded.

"I suppose it isn't my strong suit," He paused as Nadine nodded emphatically at his confession.

"Don't worry, Remus," She whispered to him, sending shivers down his spine. "I won't tell a soul."

She smirked and adjusted herself beside him as he shyly wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Remus was confident that she would stay true to her word, Nadine wasn't the type to gossip. They enjoyed the remainder of their afternoon, in silent observation as they watched the occasionally awkward interactions of the two unlikely couples.

* * *

Ginny awoke in her bed at Hogwarts, slightly chilly. She rolled over to cuddle closer to Harry who was now spending most nights in with her in her room, a fact that Ron had thankfully chosen to ignore of late. 

But as she reached out to pull herself closer to Harry, all she grasped was a vacant space beside her. The covers had not even been pulled back... he'd never come to bed.

She got out of bed hastily, her worry fighting off her slumber. Harry's weak spells had not subsided in the least and horrible thoughts were running through her head of what may have happened to him.

Following a faint glow coming from the sitting room and the distinct scrawling sound of quill on parchment, there she found Harry, by the light of a lone candle, scribbling furiously upon a scroll of parchment nearly the length of the room. His forehead rested in his hand as he wrote, he was clearly exhausted.

"Harry," Ginny soothed as she knelt beside him. "You really ought to get some sleep."

She combed her fingers through his hair and he relaxed into her touch, closing his eyes.

"I'm just trying to sort out the connection between each of the flashbacks and Hermione to see if it provides any leads to - "

"Bring her home. I know, Harry," Ginny finished for him softly. "But draining yourself isn't going help."

"I don't want to lose my train of thought here, Gin. I'm almost done, I swear."

Ginny eyed the lengthy scroll and smiled wryly.

"I vaguely remember you swearing the very same thing to me every night since we met with Remus."

Harry set laid down his quill with a sigh. He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"I know... I'm just so... I just can't rest knowing that she could be undoing... everything."

Taking a seat beside him, Ginny pulled Harry back to lean against the sofa cushions. He groaned as he stretched his aching back, he had been hunched over the table writing for hours. Ginny pushed his hair off his forehead; he couldn't express in words how much her touch could relax him but he simply wasn't able to clear his mind of his many concerns.

"Ginny?" He asked, eyes still closed.

"Mmmhmm?"

"If she changes the timeline, then this," He gestured between them, "may never be... and when she returns, it could be over, it could never have happened... I could not have been born."

"Don't think things like that, Harry."

"How can I avoid thinking it?" He was beginning to get angry again. "She's my best friend and she is knowingly destroying my past."

"If that were the case, Harry, I'm sure Remus would have been much more concerned. Remember, he did say there was someone else..."

"That doesn't mean anything. Maybe he doesn't know what the outcome will be but he was worried, I could tell."

"But what can we do about it? What's done is done, Harry," Ginny urged, attempting to calm her handsome boyfriend.

"What's done is done?" Harry repeated aghast. "Ginny! How can you say that?"

"I don't mean it like that, Harry," She insisted. "But try to look at it from Hermione's perspective. She loved you, Harry. She was sent back in time and was met by your dad who looked just like you, she was surely lonely and confused and... well, she wouldn't do it on purpose, Harry."

"The Hermione I know wouldn't have done it at all," He answered grimly.

Ginny watched him for a moment and carefully considered their options. She knew Harry was right, in a sense. The logical Hermione they all knew would never endanger the future knowingly. But Ginny could also attempt to comprehend the emotional distress Hermione would have been under. And Lupin _had_ seemed concerned, though unwilling to elaborate, which only lent itself to the belief that the reality could be far worse than they knew.

Her future with Harry was potentially hanging by a thread... his persistent illness and the unknown effects of the changing past could endanger everything they had fought for. She need only ask herself if it was worth it to know that she would go to the ends of the Earth to remedy the situation.

Or, a thought occurred to her… to London.

"I think we need to go to Grimmauld Place," Ginny said suddenly.

* * *

Hermione's head was pounding as she paced from one side of the Gryffindor common room to the other. She had to do the right thing… she _knew_ to do the right thing… these thoughts were repeated over and over again in her mind and she traced an identical path along the carpet. 

Dumbledore's instructions had been perfectly clear and Hermione would never intentionally let him down, especially after all he had done for her and would… in the future… do for Harry. She simply had to get her hands on that book.

Asking Sirius outright to take her to his childhood home was a joke. Not only would he likely flat out refuse to return to the hell hole in which he'd been raised but he would have far too many questions. Questions that she wouldn't be able to answer without revealing where she had actually come from.

The best course of action, she'd decided, would be to have Dumbledore ask him for the favor. Sirius held a great respect for the Headmaster and she knew that a request from him personally was the only chance he would consider participating.

This was where Sirius was at that very moment, meeting the Headmaster in his office and no doubt baffled at the odd request. This was also the reasoning behind Hermione's apprehensive pacing.

After a brief conference with Dumbledore the previous day, he and Hermione had devised a plausible reason for Sirius to return home to retrieve the ancient tome. Dumbledore would tell Sirius that he was aware of an extremely powerful Dark Arts book that he would very much like to keep out of the hands of those who may use it to conduct Dark Magic. The need to visit Grimmauld Place specifically would be rationalized by explaining that the private libraries of all pure-blood wizarding families with known connections to the Dark Arts would be searched for the book in time. As they both knew Sirius was a resolute adversary of Dark Magic, they felt he would be willing to consider making the trip.

Hermione's knowledge of Ancient Runes would sufficiently clarify her involvement as Sirius would need her assistance in locating the correct volume amongst the many in his family's collection. How he would react to hearing that she would be accompanying him, was another thing entirely and the primary cause of her current woes.

She tread back and forth through the room awaiting Sirius' return.

They had spared few words for one another recently, though Hermione wasn't sure why. But lately it always seemed to end up rather awkwardly when they did speak, so they merely avoided prolonged contact if possible. Spending an entire day in his company could be potentially disastrous, she thought, for a great number of reasons.

First of all, the lack of ability to communicate properly was likely problematic, especially since Hermione found it difficult to articulate herself properly when Sirius was around. Secondly, she wasn't entirely sure that she could resist his charms should he decide to engage in playful flirtation with her. If given the chance she just might throw caution to the wind and do what every instinct in her body had been urging her to do for ages and heave herself at him shamelessly.

Merlin, why didn't she ask Dumbledore if James, or even Remus, could join them in the trip to London?! At least then, she could rest peacefully knowing that they were under the watchful eyes of a fellow Marauder.

And what of James? She _did_ care deeply for James. Certainly her ridiculous attraction to Sirius would fade before long and she would, thankfully, be left alone to think only of the bespectacled young man who so resembled her best friend.

The sound of the portrait hole opening brought her out of her thoughts and stopped her pacing mid step. She turned around and caught Sirius' eye immediately.

"Sirius!" She exclaimed, a bit louder than she had intended, but her frayed nerves couldn't be contained any longer and she needed to know what had transpired in Dumbledore's office.

The tall young man walked towards her. He was weary and appeared to be bearing the weight of the world upon his shoulders.

"I suppose Dumbledore spoke to you as well?" He asked without any discernible tone in his voice.

"Yes, he did."

Sirius nodded. Taking a seat on a sofa near the fireplace, he leaned back and covered his eyes with his hand exhaustedly.

"I never thought I would have to go back to that house," He mumbled under his breath.

A wave of sympathy washed over Hermione and she strode over to sit beside him. She tentatively reached out and placed her small hand on his arm in an attempt to comfort him.

"You- We don't have to. You could say no," She suggested, part of her wishing he would agree to call off the search if it meant she could ease his pain.

Too many years though had been spent in his wretched childhood home and Hermione sensed that he might find some joy in taking something away from the house, knowing it would never have a chance to be used for evil.

Sirius must have, indeed, felt that way because he shook his head negating her suggestion.

"If Dumbledore believes the matter so important, than I must oblige him," He answered solemnly, though he still appeared reluctant.

"I know it's awful, Sirius, but with the two of us working together we can probably find the book and be back here within just a few hours," She consoled. "Perhaps, we can even enlist Kreacher to aid us."

Sirius drew his hand away from his face and stared at her critically.

"How do you know his name?"

It wasn't so much his words that sent panic flooding through Hermione as it was his glare. He _really_ hated that house and everything about it and guilt now engulfed her along with the myriad of emotions she was already battling.

"I… umm… I heard you mention it to James once," She lied, removing her hand from where it still lay on his arm.

"Did you?" Sirius asked.

"Yes," She hoped that he wouldn't push the topic.

Luckily for her, he didn't.

Rather, he leaned forward on the couch and watched the fire as he spoke again.

"We leave Saturday morning by portkey. It will be my _mother's _birthday and she and my father will go out of town to celebrate as they always do," Sirius explained, emphasizing his bitterness when he spoke of his mother.

He stood and shoved his hands into his pockets, attempting to appear casual, and though Hermione was not fooled in the least, she figured he would need some time alone to come to terms with having to, once again, set foot in Grimmauld Place.

"If you'll excuse me," He said with a nod as he turned his back on her and walked up the stairs to his dormitory then disappeared.

Hermione sat on the couch long after he had gone, feeling wretched for being the purpose behind Sirius having to face the demons of his childhood and lying to him about it to boot.

There weren't currently any other options though, she thought sadly. She would simply have to accept it and do all she could to grant Dumbledore's request.

* * *

There was a knock at the door and Ginny raced to answer it, leaving a still exhausted Harry in her wake. 

She pulled the door open to reveal her brother Ron yawning loudly, his hair untidy and disheveled like one who had just been rudely awoken from a deep slumber.

This was, in fact the case.

"Someone better be dead," He grumbled as he dragged himself past Ginny into the room.

Harry was leaning against the arm of the sofa, propped up on an elbow and greeted Ron with a tired nod. Taking a seat beside his best friend, Ron sank back into the cushions and almost instantly began falling asleep.

"Ron, you have to wake up, this is important!" Ginny urged.

Ron's head snapped up.

"Hmm? I'm up. I'm up!"

Ginny rolled her eyes.

"We are going to go to Grimmauld Place," She stated, watching the boys for their reactions.

Harry was struggling to stay awake and still unsure as to why Ginny had decided that they must return to London on such short notice because she had refused to explain until Ron had been woken up.

Ron was clearly waiting for her to say something to warrant his sleep having been interrupted.

"Why?" Ron mumbled.

Ginny paced around the coffee table a bit as she considered how best to explain herself.

"We came to Hogwarts because Harry thought that it would provide answers for us regarding Hermione's disappearance… and it did. The flashbacks happened and we learned from McGonagall and Remus the truth about what happened to Hermione. But I don't know that there is really anything left for us to find here…"

"And since she disappeared from Grimmauld Place, there could be clues there that we missed," Harry continued, sitting up a little straighter, momentarily forgetting how tired he was.

"Exactly," Concluded the red head. Taking a seat upon the coffee table in front of the boys, she explained further.

"After reading 'Hogwarts: A History', we've figured out that the flashbacks were a result of the imprints in the school's own memory. I'm sure they were triggered by the school's awareness of Hermione's memories and our own and our mutual presence here."

"I was just going to say that," Ron chimed in cheekily.

He and Harry started laughing raucously, no doubt delirious from lack of sleep.

Ginny rolled her eyes and chuckled along with them.

"Nice, Ronald," She laughed sarcastically.

Ron smiled impertinently back at his sister.

"When shall we plan on departing, _Ginevra_?" He asked, drawing out her full name just as she had used his.

After smacking his arm, Ginny replied, "I'll speak to Professor McGonagall tomorrow to see when she can arrange a portkey. I'm not sure that Harry would be up to travelling all the way to London by broom."

"Right then. Great thinking, Sis. I'm off to bed," Ron said with finality as he walked towards the door.

"'Night Ron," Ginny and Harry answered in unison.

Ron pulled the door open and paused. He turned back around.

"Oh, and Harry?" He called innocently.

Harry looked up at his best friend in response.

Ron smiled mischievously, "You might have better luck getting your energy back if you slept in your own bed once in a while."

Blushing tomato red, Harry sputtered for a moment but not a single lucid word escaped his lips.

Ginny jumped to her feet.

"Ronald!" She cried but it was for nothing.

Laughing to himself wryly, Ron was already pulling the door shut behind him. He was a few paces from the door when he heard a loud thump behind him. A lifetime with Ginny had taught him that it was the indisputable sound of a book having been hurled at the opposite side of the door.

* * *

Saturday arrived in a heartbeat. Before Hermione even had time to blink, she found herself waiting in the common room for Sirius so they could meet the Headmaster for their scheduled portkey. 

She yawned and stretched out her legs, it was beyond early. The sun had yet to stream through the tower windows... it was not yet sunrise. Tilting her head back against the couch cushions, Hermione allowed her eyes to fall shut and soon her breathing evened out as she began to doze off.

Footsteps on the boys stairway jolted her awake. That would be Sirius, she thought, coming to reluctantly return home to London. She unsuccessfully smoothed her hair and straightened her sweater. Dumbledore had suggested they wear muggle clothing since the portkey would be taking them to an alley near Grimmauld Place, it would draw less attention to them than if they were to don wizard's robes. Hermione had chosen jeans and a deep red sweater, to fight off the burgeoning winter chill.

The footsteps drew near the bottom of the staircase and Hermione was taken aback when James, not Sirius, entered the room. He was still wearing his pajamas; the plaid cotton drawstring pants hung low on his waist and he was pulling a white undershirt over his head, giving Hermione an extended view of his toned abdomen.

James grinned when he saw Hermione's eyes taking in the sight.

"My shirt is on now so you have to pretend to be interested in more than my looks, Hermione," James laughed sarcastically.

Hermione blushed furiously.

"I wasn't...umm... I - I wasn't," Was her pitiful argument.

Crossing the room and enveloping her in his arms, James just laughed.

"I'm teasing you," He soothed. "I wish I could go with you today... though I still don't understand why you have to go with Sirius to fetch some old book anyways."

Hermione sighed. "Because I'm familiar with ancient runes and Sirius isn't," She repeated for the hundredth time. This was starting to weigh on her conscience, it wasn't exactly a lie but blatantly avoiding the actual reason for the visit was just as bad.

"Why can't Dumbledore go himself?" James asked.

"James, Dumbledore has more important things to see to than running miscellaneous errands when it can easily be done by someone else," She answered tiredly.

"You're right," James sighed, still not letting go of her. "I'll miss you though."

"Merlin, Prongs... She'll be back in few hours," Grumbled a sleepy voice near the staircase.

Hermione unconsciously pushed James away from her when she heard Sirius' voice. He was leaning against the banister unenthusiastically and though he was dressed in casual muggle clothes, the slacks and navy blue sweater were a dead give away to his aristocratic upbringing.

More simply put, he looked amazing.

He covered his mouth as he yawned heavily. As her eyes trailed from his fresh-out-of-bed mussed hair to his toned arms noticeable even through the fitted sweater and... Oh Gods, those pants... Hermione was speechless. This had to be some sort of cruel joke. She was seriously expected to spend an entire day with Sirius Black while he looked like _that_?

"What time does your portkey leave?" James asked and Hermione pulled her eyes away from Sirius.

"Umm... seven o'clock," She replied, trying to shake the image of those pants out of her head. James was giving her the familiar strange look that he did whenever she realized she'd been caught staring at Sirius.

Compensating for making the mistake, yet again, she smiled widely at him.

"I'll see you later today," She said sweetly.

James opened his mouth to respond when Sirius cut him off impatiently.

"If you two are going to have an hour long goodbye session here, then I'm going back to bed."

Hermione nodded and bent over to pick up her school bag. She had packed a few extra things as she wasn't sure how many hours they would be gone.

"Right. We can't be late," She agreed.

James looked between the two with a curious expression... and the vaguest hint of a glare.

"Alright, I'll see you two later then," He bid them goodbye with a slight edge to his voice.

"Later, mate," Sirius mumbled and headed towards the door.

Hermione gave James a strained smile and after a brief hesitation, reached up and kissed his cheek. He didn't smile in return, he just nodded and watched as Hermione turned and followed Sirius out of the portrait hole.

Corridor after corridor they trudged along in silence. There was not a soul in sight thanks to the extremely early hour, in fact, the soft snores emanating from the walls revealed that even the portraits were still sound asleep. Hermione examined Sirius out of the corner of her eye and observed that he looked tired... he didn't appear to have slept much if at all.

He walked along beside her, staring at the floor pensively all the while.

She wanted him to know that she understood his pain, that she knew exactly what he had gone through, though as she was not able to tell him the truth about her "past" she could not express this to him. But she would try.

The stone gargoyles appeared before them as they arrived at the entrance to the Headmaster's office but before speaking the password, Hermione turned to Sirius and took a deep breath before saying, "For what it's worth, Sirius, I think you are extraordinary. Your family is the poorer for not seeing in you what your friends… and I… know you to be."

Hermione's face was heated as she blushed but she was numb to the sensation when Sirius looked up from the floor and directly into her eyes. Written in his own eyes, she saw his fear and vulnerability entirely exposed.

He was afraid to go home.

He searched her face as though desperate to find evidence that she had meant what she'd said. He began to speak and then stopped himself by clearing his throat. Once more he tried to say something in response but found that a lump in his throat was growing more and more difficult to swallow and decided against another attempt at speech.

He settled for nodding at her and turned away, his eyes burning with emotion that he forced into submission.

Hermione looked away and spoke the password to the gargoyles. The spiral staircase was revealed and she turned to Sirius who was still looking away.

"Sirius, we ought to go…" She said softly.

He raised his head and watched her for a moment before taking a single long step to reach her. As much as he hated the idea of appearing weak, there was something about Hermione that made him want to trust her. He furrowed his brow with uncertainty and tried to find the right words to express what her words had meant to him.

But there was no need. For the first time, Hermione could read Sirius like an open book and she could all but hear the thoughts running through his head.

She smiled at him and grasped her book bag a bit tighter to restrain herself from embracing him, conveying her comprehension and acknowledgement of his silent question. Drawing away he gestured to the passageway indicating that she should climb the staircase first. Following behind her, he swelled with a renewed assurance that he could face whatever demons remained at Grimmauld Place.

Dumbledore stood in front of his desk and greeted them when they entered his office.

"I trust you both have traveled by portkey before?"

The two students nodded. "Yes, Sir," They answered.

"Excellent. You have one minute until this portkey is activated." He pointed to a chipped teacup set upon his desk. "You shall return by floo, however. The fireplace here in my office will be accessible for you two whenever you have completed your task."

"Yes, Sir," They repeated once more.

"Very well. I shall see you both upon your return," He affirmed with a confident wink.

Hermione and Sirius each placed a finger upon the charmed teacup and as the numerous clocks in Dumbledore's office began to chime the hour, they both felt the familiar tug behind their navel and spun through the air as the office dropped out of sight.

Within seconds they fell into an alleyway, half-lit with the early morning sun, Sirius landing firmly upon his feet while Hermione dizzily lost her balance and fell to the ground with a thud.

Sirius fought an impulse to laugh and immediately offered his hand to assist her, which she gladly accepted, however, embarrassed though she somehow managed to disregard the tingle his touch sent through her body.

"Thank you," She muttered with growing humiliation as she brushed dirt from her jeans and sweater. Fully expecting a joke from him about having women fall at his feet, she bit her lip anticipating the retort.

Rather, he smiled and began walking out of the alley and into the small square that would lead to Grimmauld Place.

When they reached the front door labeled number twelve, Sirius tapped the doorknob with his wand and the door swung open. He stepped in first and waved Hermione in beckoning her to follow him.

It was an incredibly odd feeling for Hermione to enter the house in which she had spent so much time, as it turned out, she wouldn't have to put on any airs of surprise as though she hadn't been there before because the house was nearly unrecognizable. There was not a dusty surface to be found in the entire building, in fact, the entire house gleamed as though brand new and reeked of upper class. Obviously, the Blacks took great pride in their home which was very grandiose, in this time.

It couldn't have been more different from the Grimmauld Place she had known in her own time. The only thing that was familiar to Hermione was Sirius himself. Though he, thankfully, lacked the despondency in his eyes that he would gain during his years in Azkaban. She remembered how much Sirius hated being trapped within these walls during her fifth year and therefore was not stunned that the younger Sirius, who was with her now, exuded the same abhorrence of the house and all the memories within.

He walked through the entrance hall briskly, mumbling a greeting to a startled house elf that scurried past them, clearly horror-struck that the disowned son of his Masters had returned.

Spending any more time in his childhood home than necessary was not an appealing prospect for Sirius and he decided to get straight to the task at hand.

"The library is up here," He told her as he began climbing the stairs.

She allowed him to lead the way, despite the fact that she certainly knew where the library was located. The climbed the steep stairs in silence. In fact, the entire house was eerily quiet, their footsteps on the stairway echoed throughout the pristine dwelling.

Entering the library, the reality of the daunting task hit them both at once. There were hundreds of books… more like thousands… reaching from floor to ceiling on shelves lining all four walls.

"Bloody hell," Sirius cursed aloud. He hadn't remembered there being so many shelves. "This will take all day."

"If we only knew the title of the book we could try a summoning charm but-"

"We don't," He concluded with a sigh.

"Right," She confirmed uncomfortably, setting her school bag on a desk and surveying their surroundings. "Well, I'll start over here and you start on that side and… umm… well, let's just get started."

Sirius grumbled something indecipherable under his breath and crossed the room where he knelt down in front of the first row of bookshelves and began running his finger over the binding of each book.

They worked in silence for about twenty minutes before Sirius found a book written in some very indecipherable symbols. He turned around to call over to her but was silenced when he saw her standing on her toes reaching for a book on a high shelf. Of course, the gentlemanly thing to do would be to offer to help her but he wasn't thinking of anything remotely gentlemanly when he saw the hem of her sweater begin to creep up as she stretched her arms over her head to grasp the book. A sliver of smooth bare skin was revealed as well as a hint of pink lace from beneath her jeans.

Sirius felt his mouth go dry… probably because his jaw was hanging open. He was no stranger to seeing women's underwear but the notion of pink lace on Hermione made his body react in ways that would be difficult to explain should she notice.

He cleared his throat and tried to focus on the task at hand… instead of what he would like to do to Hermione _with _his hands.

"Uh… Here is one written in runes."

Hermione, having finally reached the tome she had been clambering for, crossed the room and took the book from him. Their hands touched for a brief moment, resulting in her heartbeat rapidly increasing, and she forced herself to turn away from him. If every time she was within five feet of Sirius, she would respond like this, then today was going to be an excruciatingly long day, she thought maddeningly.

Centering her attention on the book in her hands, Hermione could tell that their search was far from over. She remembered explicitly what the book had looked like and, much to Sirius' dismay, this wasn't it.

"No, these aren't the proper runes. Sorry," She informed him. "Dumbledore… um… told me what sort of symbols to look for."

Sirius nodded vaguely and went back to his search.

The first hour passed slowly and though they each found three books written in runes, none of them were the particular volume they needed. Hermione had happily recalled on which shelf she had discovered the book in her own time, though she did not share this with Sirius, of course. But her excitement was dashed when the book was not found anywhere near its future location.

As the morning wore on, hunger was beginning to hamper their concentration as neither Hermione nor Sirius had eaten breakfast that morning.

Hermione's stomach growled loudly as the ten o'clock hour approached. Sirius turned away from his current shelf search and chuckled.

"Hungry?" He laughed.

She nodded, praying to any deity that would listen to allow her to refrain from humiliating herself any more that day.

"So, am I," Sirius confessed. "Short break then?"

"Please!" Hermione agreed ardently.

"Alright, the kitchen is this way," Sirius grinned.

He was smiling properly for the first time since he'd discovered he would have to return to Grimmauld Place and, for that, Hermione couldn't have been more thankful.

After refusing the help of one of the house elves, Sirius and Hermione managed to put together a suitable meal for themselves which they enjoyed in perfect silence at the kitchen table. They had been completely ravenous and ate rather too quickly for polite company but just short of resembling complete barbarians.

When they had finished, Hermione having offered to clear the table, collected the dishes and began washing them in the sink. She reached absently into a drawer for a clean dish towel which she used to dry the dishes and utensils until they sparkled. After she had put everything away to its proper place she turned around only to find Sirius standing directly behind her.

He appeared taller than ever as he loomed over her, with an interested expression.

"You certainly know your way around a kitchen," He mused.

Hermione's face fell in awareness of how thoughtless she'd been… moving about the kitchen as though she'd grown up in the house herself.

"Oh, yes," She stammered. "I'm rather fond of… um… cooking…"

She sounded completely stupid and she knew it, but at least he was smiling and did not appear suspicious.

"Are you?" He asked teasingly. "Well, as much as I would like to take you up on that, Hermione, we have more pressing matters upstairs, I believe?"

The image of Sirius' bedroom door came into focus in Hermione's mind as she stood immovable between him and the kitchen counter.

"Up– Upstairs?" She stuttered, apparently her failure to speak properly around him hadn't subsided.

Sirius raised an eyebrow in puzzlement.

"The library… Remember?"

"Oh!" She gasped in embarrassment. "Right, the book… yes, we should… do that."

As flames rose in her cheeks, Hermione ducked around his lean body and lead the way out of the kitchen, away from that infuriating smirk of his, and up to the library, damning herself with each step. 'This day cannot possibly get any worse,' She thought sourly.

She was wrong, as it turned out.

- - - -

Two more hours passed by at a snail's pace and though Sirius and Hermione were making quite a bit of progress, they had yet to uncover anything useful.

After a while, they began chatting aimlessly, mostly small talk. Hermione told him of her muggle upbringing and receiving her Hogwarts letter while Sirius spoke of the various adventures of him and his school friends and how they came to be known as the Marauders.

Hermione laughed against her better judgment.

"I still can't believe that you put dung bombs in the Slytherin toilets. How did you even get in there?"

"James has an invi-," Sirius started to explain before cutting himself off. He felt himself beginning to place too much trust in this girl whom he barely knew. "Eh, let's just call it a Marauder's secret, shall we?"

Hermione scoffed to herself, Marauder's secret… Right. She knew exactly what he thought he was hiding. Golden Trio secret, as well then.

"Sure," She smiled. "Though, I'm sure some of our male classmates wouldn't mind learning a few Marauders' secrets themselves, namely, how you've all managed to bewitch every female in the school."

Sirius barked in laughter.

"Bewitched? Hardly," He answered pompously. "It isn't our fault that we're devastatingly handsome and earning top marks in every class."

"Don't forget humble," Hermione added, laughing loudly.

"Right," Sirius agreed. "We're all exceedingly humble. That's what the girls love about me; my modesty."

"Spoken like a true Marauder," Hermione teased. "You may want to be careful, however, many of the girls aren't too pleased that you are no longer single. I have overheard some rather devious planning in the lavatory."

"Nothing too dangerous, I hope," He said rolling his eyes.

"Oh no, simple love potions mostly," She related in jest. "I believe they plan to wait until you are back on the market again to strike."

The smile faded slowly from Sirius' face.

"What does that mean?"

"It doesn't mean anything," Hermione answered honestly.

"You don't think I'll stay with Callie?" He asked forwardly, placing the large book he had been holding on the table beside him and stepping towards her.

"It wasn't me who said it, Sirius," She hurried to explain. "It's just what I've heard."

"So, that's what you girls gossip about? You're waiting for me to break up with Callie?" He said curtly.

Hermione could not comprehend why he was getting upset. One moment they had been joking and laughing together and now he was bearing down on her angrily.

"I'm hardly the type to gossip," Hermione shot back. "_I_ don't care what you do with Callie!"

"You don't?" He dared incredulously.

"No, I don't," She snapped. "And how can you be upset if people gossip about you two when you're constantly snogging in front of the entire school!?"

He narrowed his eyes and took a few more steps closer to her, the bookcases long forgotten.

"Did you ever stop to think that it may be because I like Callie?"

"It's clear that you like _something_ about her. But how much can you possibly like a girl that you refuse to refer to as your girlfriend?" Hermione yelled scathingly.

"About as much as you can like my best friend whom, by the way, _you've_ never referred to as your boyfriend… nor kissed, come to think of it," He growled.

Hermione balled her fists in rage and squared her shoulders.

"That isn't any of your business! You can't compare my relationship with James to your… _fling_ with Callie!"

He sneered at her, "You're just jealous."

Hermione's eyes widened with fury.

"Jealous? You think I'm jealous of Callie? That's ludicrous."

Sirius was standing face to face with her now; his breathing was ragged from anger.

"You're jealous that you don't have the same relationship with James that I have with Callie!"

"If I wanted to snog James in a corridor, Sirius, I would!" She shouted. "But to imply that I'm jealous of your superficial relationship is simply –"

"Avoiding the topic," Sirius interrupted in very controlled tone.

"I already told you that it isn't any of your business," She hissed. "And you have no right to criticize me for _not _kissing James when you've messed about with half the girls in school!"

Sirius raised an eyebrow and laughed harshly.

"So what if I have? At least I'm honest about my intentions unlike yourself."

"Oh! I'm dishonest now too?!" She yelled incredulously.

Sirius slammed his fist into the desk, "Damn it, Hermione! You're a fucking tease!"

"How dare you!" She screamed. At lighting speed her open palm made contact with his cheek in a resounding slap.

Sirius turned away from her furiously to contain his wrath. He gripped the back of a chair, his knuckles turning white.

"It's true! You lead James on when you know damn well how he bloody feels about you!" He said, as the volume of his voice rose threateningly.

"I have never led him on. I care about James and I would never do anything to hu –"

"Like kiss his best friend?!" Sirius demanded irately.

Hermione gasped. She couldn't believe that he would use that against her. It was true though… she had kissed Sirius that night while James had been away.

"That was an accident! I never meant for it to happen… you knew what you were doing!" She countered.

"I was there, Hermione! You wanted it just as much as –"

He cut himself off midsentence before he could make the horrible admission that he had very much wanted that kiss to happen. He composed himself and covering with the fiercest sneer he could manage, he fired again. "I just wanted to see if I could get you to do it. It was easier than I thought."

Hermione was horrified. She felt lightheaded. The same kiss that had haunted her dreams and inhabited her thoughts had been… a joke. She felt foolish and was overcome with detestation for the man standing before her.

"Once we're done here, I don't want you to speak to me… _ever _again," She said in a restricted whisper, afraid that if she let go, she would cry.

"Fine," Sirius answered. "But James -"

"James is ten-times the man you'll ever be!" Hermione interrupted, the calm tone straining to cover the tears that burned in her eyes. She refused to allow Sirius Black to use James as an excuse for his ghastly behavior.

Sirius looked as though she had punched him in the stomach. For a fleeting moment, the despondency that was once familiar in the elder Sirius' eyes was visible.

But only seconds later, an icy glare secured itself upon his face and he glared down at her.

"Let's find this book and get the hell out of here," He said with a dangerous edge to his voice.

He stormed back to the bookshelf and slammed a large tome back onto the shelf furiously.

Hermione stood rooted to the floor, glaring after him. She was shaking with anger, how dare he accuse her of having superficial feelings for James when he was a notorious playboy and… he used her. He had _used _her.

She couldn't even remember now why the argument had escalated to such an appalling degree but she was livid. Not only with Sirius… she was angry with herself too for believing that he had ever had good intentions… for giving him the benefit of the doubt.

She turned her back to him and braced herself on the desk.

The sounds of him slamming books around the shelves reminded her that, unless she wanted to be trapped in the house with a furious animagus, she had better get back to work.

Hermione had no idea how much time had passed when she finally laid eyes upon the very book she had been seeking. She pulled it from the shelf and turned it over in her hands, this was it. As torn as she had been about returning to her own time, all she could think now was that this book was her escape from being further exposed to Sirius' ridicule.

"I found it," Hermione stated just loud enough to hear over Sirius' racket. They turned towards one another but refused to make eye contact.

"Are you sure?" Sirius commanded.

Hermione nodded but realized that he was looking away from her just as adamantly as she was not looking at him.

"Yes," She spat.

Without another word to her, Sirius turned to the library fireplace and irritably throwing a handful of floo powder into the flames, he said clearly, "Albus Dumbledore's Office."

Bright green flames erupted around him as his dark wild eyes met Hermione's. He held her gaze until he disappeared from view, his eyes a mingling of pain and fury.

Hermione was fighting back tears as the argument replayed in her mind. Taking a handful of floo powder she looked around the room and shook her head. How had everything gone so wrong so quickly?

She repeated Sirius' words and a moment later she was speeding through the labyrinth of hearths before tumbling out of the fireplace and for the second time that day, fell to the floor at Sirius Black's feet.

* * *

**New Review Question! **

**If you could cast any actor in the world to play Sirius Black in the Harry Potter films, who would it be? **

**My choice is the gorgeous Christian Bale, as those who have visited my profile would know !**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **Thank you to Anasella Emm for the multitude of emails, encouragement, ideas and support.

I love my reviewers! You guys are the reason that I stay in at nights to write and I love you all!

**Chapter Fourteen.**

* * *

Remus was positive he had never witnessed a more awkward scene in his entire life. 

The Gryffindor common room was buzzing with conversation and there were plenty of students scattered about studying but in the corner nearest the fireplace, a group of seventh years sat in complete silence. The friends had gathered together, at Remus' insistence, to study for a Potions exam, however, to the detriment of their studious endeavor, things were not going according to plan.

Hermione and Sirius were not speaking to one another, though neither had acknowledged this fact. When James then Remus and, finally, Peter had inquired as to the reasoning behind their mutual silent treatment, they had both feigned ignorance of any unusual behavior.

Remus, being the only individual privy to Sirius' innermost thoughts, figured their recent actions, or lack thereof, was a result of something to do with their palpable attraction towards one another. Sirius had confessed his feelings for Hermione to the werewolf and though Remus could only assume that Hermione reciprocated his friend's feelings, it was a nearly certain assumption… it was just bloody obvious, actually.

But the circumstances surrounding their recent coolness towards one another remained a mystery. In the two days since Sirius and Hermione had gone to London, there had not been an appropriate opportunity for Remus to ask his friend what had actually happened. By no accident either, it seemed. Sirius was apparently avoiding everyone for fear of being interrogated about that very topic.

James, too, was immensely curious about what had gone on in London though he was not terribly troubled by the fact that his best friend and his girlfriend were clearly upset with another. Truth be told, he rather liked not having to worry about catching Hermione gazing at Sirius or being caught in the middle as they glanced back and forth at one another in class and during meals and in the corridors… and, well, everywhere, as a matter of fact. Perhaps, they thought he had never noticed… but he most definitely had.

But now, for the first time in quite a while, when he was with Hermione he felt that she was paying him her undivided attention. And for that, he was not even remotely upset, even if it was a result of some sort of argument that she'd had with Sirius. The only distressing aspect of the whole thing was that Sirius had begun to make himself scarce. James supposed that Callie was likely enjoying more time with Sirius just as James was with Hermione.

But, he thought to himself wryly, Sirius would come around as he always did when he was ready to move on to another of the beautiful girls in school.

Though right now… at this particular moment, the four Marauders and Hermione found themselves all together. James sat on the sofa, Hermione to his left and Sirius to his right. Remus had settled into his favorite armchair across from them and Peter was sprawled on his belly upon the rug. All five teenagers were thoroughly engrossed in their own thoughts, none of them focused on Potions.

Arriving at the conclusion that this study session would not be very productive unless they actually spoke to one another, Remus ventured to engage the group in discussion.

"Why don't we go over the properties of the Dreamless Sleep Potion since we know Slughorn will include that in the exam," He spoke up.

There was no reaction from the group. He tried again.

"James? Do you want to add anything?"

James smirked. "Come on, mate. You know we'll all pass with flying colors," He jested confidently.

Remus shook his head and smiled at his friend's arrogance.

"Alright then. Sirius? Hermione? Do either of you have anything to add?" He offered looking between them.

Hermione stiffened and looked at her open text book while Sirius shrugged at his friend.

"No," They answered in unison, then wincing in turn as they heard themselves speak as one, went back to their previous positions of staring at opposite sides of the room.

"Great. This has been a most productive use of time," Remus said sarcastically.

"I still don't know the difference between the Dreamless Sleep Potion and the Draught of Peace," whined Peter from his place on the floor, frowning at his parchment where he had scribbled some indecipherable notes.

Remus rubbed his eyes tiredly and said nothing, so James, who had no immediate plans to study for a test on which he was sure he would earn top marks, volunteered to help.

"The Draught of Peace uses powdered moonstone," He said knowledgably as he slid off the couch to sit beside Peter. "The Dreamless Sleep Potion doesn't, see?" He pointed to a list of potion ingredients in the text book.

James' sudden vacancy had created an open space between Hermione and Sirius that to the two of them felt like a black hole, pulling them towards one another against their will, as they were both extremely aware that there was no longer a barrier separating them. Hermione gripped the arm of the sofa so as not to move even a centimeter towards the scowling boy at the opposite end of the couch.

The portrait hole swung open, just then, and Lily walked in followed by Frank Longbottom with his arm around Alice. They spotted their fellow seventh years near the fireplace and headed over to join them, Lily fell behind with hesitation.

"Hey everyone," Frank addressed the group with a warm smile and the Marauders and Hermione each greeted their housemates in response.

Lily's eyes immediately found James, who was hunched over Peter's textbook, assisting his friend patiently. The bespectacled Head Boy looked up at Lily and nodded casually in her direction. He failed to ruffle his hair as he always had when she was nearby, she noticed with an odd sense of disappointment. She smiled at him tentatively… it had been a few weeks since she had placed that juvenile Perma-Stick Jinx on him and she wasn't sure if he'd forgiven her as the only time they had spoken since was when dealing with their duties as Head Boy and Girl.

James smiled back at her pleasantly, before turning his attention to Hermione. He winked at her playfully and reached up to grab her hand, Lily, it seemed, was forgotten.

Hermione, meanwhile, was watching apprehensively as Lily approached them. It did not seem in Lily's character to disclose someone's personal troubles, but the fact that Lily had heard Hermione's embarrassing confession about Sirius, made it almost impossible for Hermione to breathe properly when she was nearby.

But as Lily's eyes fell upon Hermione, there was not the slightest trace of judgment within them. What she found instead was kindness, warmth… and, peculiarly… defeat. Lily smiled at her and transferred her gaze to the sofa where she surveyed Hermione's hand linked with James'. Whispering something hurriedly to Alice, Lily excused herself politely and retreated to the dormitory.

"Mind if we join you?" Frank asked the group jovially as Lily ascended the stairs.

"Not at all," James invited waving them to sit in the available space on the sofa.

Frank, though, was oblivious to Sirius and Hermione's recent bought of silence and rather than sitting down between them, wedged he and Alice both between Sirius and the edge of the sofa, pushing Sirius up against the one person he wanted to be furthest from in the world; much to James' discontent and Remus' innate desire to maintain harmony among the group.

Hermione found herself helplessly crammed beside Sirius, her hand breaking away from her contact with James. The sofa certainly had not been intended to comfortably seat four grown teenagers, she thought exasperatedly. And she hated beyond comprehension that her body reacted so positively to his proximity even after the terrible things he had said to her. She swore she would never speak to him again but her staunch resistance waivered as his hand rested on his thigh and his fingers brushed against her leg, jolting awake parts of her that should always remain dormant among polite company.

Their elbows battled for reign over the miniscule space they were compelled to share.

Hermione turned her head away briskly, sending a wave of curly hair flying into Sirius' face. He furiously nudged it away with his shoulder and forced himself to take a very deep, calming breath when the scent of her hair stirred his subconscious into a whirlwind of stimulation.

Sirius cursed himself silently for not being able to assert better control over his hormones and knew this would be a very embarrassing situation for him if he didn't get away from Hermione at once. Jumping to his feet briskly, the conversation that had been taking place between Remus and Frank came to an abrupt halt.

"I'm going to bed," Sirius said as he strode quickly away from them towards the stairs in a robe- billowing gait that could put Severus Snape to shame.

As he disappeared up the stairs, all eyes but Hermione's watched him curiously before then turning to look at the young witch who was summoning every ounce of restraint to appear calm and not bolt from the room as Sirius had done.

James and Remus had both been observing their friends while paying little attention to their respective conversations and were not at all ignorant to the acute reactions the sardine-can like seating arrangement had elicited from Sirius and Hermione. Judging from the expression on Sirius' face, Remus was able to tell that whatever had happened between the two of them had only intensified Sirius' feelings for her. Neither seemed pleased to have been shoved together but their responses were hardly as negative as one would think given their recent actions.

Remus braced himself as he shifted his gaze to James who was still seated on the floor peering at the empty staircase that Sirius had so recently climbed.

James was horror-struck as he came to the eye opening realization.

Remus saw that James had finally caught on to what he himself had known for quite a while.

Sirius _liked_ Hermione.

Everything suddenly clicked James' mind. It was so obvious. How had he not realized it sooner?

The fleeting stares between Sirius and Hermione were not just an over abundance of his best friend's flirtatious nature… he liked her.

Sirius genuinely liked her.

James turned his attention to Hermione as he took it all in. She twirled one of her long curls between her fingers and bit her lip, looking from the ceiling to the fireplace. The very picture of innocence.

He then turned to Remus whose expression gave away all the verification of Sirius' treachery James needed to believe its accuracy. Remus knew as well then. 'Was he the last to know?', James asked himself. 'Had he been merely playing the fool all this time as his friends sat idly by allowing Sirius to attempt to charm Hermione away from him?'

Unbeknownst to him, however, James had missed one critical point: the motivation behind Hermione's reactions to his best friend.

Maybe he was blinded by his feelings for her or perhaps he had been so focused on his suspicions about Sirius' intentions that he had failed to surmise that Hermione's behavior was more meaningful than just an awkward response to Sirius' advances. Whatever the reason was behind his unawareness, he decided that Hermione was blameless in this situation.

Sirius, though, had his playboy reputation working against him and, later, would have one hell of a lot of explaining to do.

Shooting Remus a glare that clearly said that this would be discussed later, James got to his feet and reached for Hermione.

"Let's go for a walk, I need some air, I think," He said quietly, trying to wrap his head around Sirius' disloyalty.

Hermione paled. 'Oh, Merlin, He knows,' She panicked mutely.

James led her out of the common room by the hand and she held her breath, awaiting a barrage of anger that she knew was more than justified. After all, not only had she kissed James' best friend but she had been mentally unfaithful to a much more explicit degree on a great number of occasions.

As the pair walked through the vacant corridors, she prayed silently, and not for the first time, that James had not recently learned legilimency.

Hermione was so caught up in her internal web of potential excuses for her horrid behavior that she gasped aloud when James stopped abruptly.

He clasped both of her hands in his own and pulled her close to him, as he spoke earnestly.

"Hermione, has Sirius ever… God, I can't believe I'm actually about to say this but… has he ever… made a pass at you?"

That was _not _the barrage of anger that she had been expecting.

"Don't be ridiculous, James!" She sputtered in response, choosing her words carefully. "Sirius is your best friend!"

Not exactly a lie, she thought… Sirius never had a_ctually _come on to her. He had kissed her, yes, but hadn't she kissed him back?

"Yes, yes, he's my best friend. I am _painfully _aware of that fact at the moment," James growled and began to pace before her. "Haven't you ever seen the way he looks at you? Because I sure as hell have."

Hermione swallowed hard.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Ok… that time it was a lie.

"Gods, Hermione! Are you blind? He likes you!" James shouted, his words echoing down the corridor.

Hermione followed the sound of the retreating reverberation of his voice with her eyes. The hint of a smile played upon her lips but was washed away when reality ensnared her attention.

"No, James," She said sadly. "He doesn't."

"How do you know for sure?" He asked, ceasing his pacing and staring at her intently as he awaited her explanation.

She stepped closer to him and reached up to straighten his glasses that had slid askew during his outburst.

"I know because Sirius would never allow anything to come between you two," She answered plainly.

"But he – "

"He doesn't want _me_, James," Hermione interrupted, her voice raised a degree. She took a long, shaky breath. She hadn't prepared for the emotional blow of saying those words aloud. "He has Callie. That should be explanation enough."

James nodded but was not entirely convinced.

Hermione crossed her arms over her chest and looked at the floor, trying to disguise her sadness.

"I'm getting tired," She concluded. She gave James a long penetrating stare before turning back towards Gryffindor tower.

James watched her for a moment before trailing after her. He had no idea what to think now. He didn't think he had misread Sirius but, perhaps, he had overreacted. Though, in addition to his concerns about his best friend, James was now wondering why Hermione had looked so miserable when she'd confessed that there was nothing between her and Sirius. Mentally adding that to the laundry list of worries he would ruminate over later in bed, he followed Hermione through the portrait hole.

She stopped at the foot of the girls' stairs and whispered a goodnight to James. But before she could leave him, he leaned down and kissed the top of her head tenderly.

"Goodnight, Hermione."

Their eyes met through the dim light. James' were affectionate but marred with uncertainty while Hermione's expression was plagued with anguish and guilt.

She managed a brief smile before jogging up the stairs and around the corner.

Hours later, Hermione still lay awake in bed. Sleep had evaded her all night as her brain refused to be put to rest.

This situation was beginning to get out of hand. She had managed to diffuse some of James' concerns for the moment but if she did not learn to control herself around Sirius, it would not be long before James discovered the truth, that she was pathetically attracted to Sirius Black. 'Honestly,' she scolded herself, 'You are no better than any of the ridiculous Marauder groupies in this school.'

What made it worse was that she was still so angry with Sirius. But no matter how rigorously she drilled that fact into her conscious mind, her body refused to obey. Why couldn't she feel that way about James? His mere presence didn't send an eruption of butterflies twirling about her stomach. She didn't understand. James was wonderful… amazing even. Smart, funny, gorgeous. The kind of man Hermione could only have ever dreamed of having as her own. And she cared for him… she loved him… she loved him…

Over and over these words played in her head as she drifted off to sleep… she loved him… and Sirius' face came into focus as her final clear thought.

At the same time, two teenage boys lay awake in their respective beds in a dorm across the tower. Neither speaking, neither moving… but both focusing on the very same thing.

One hoping he had the solitary affections of the girl he was growing to love.

The other wishing he could have what the other possessed.

* * *

The next morning, Sirius sat up in bed and sighed heavily. He wasn't sure what time he had eventually managed to fall asleep but he felt thoroughly exhausted; physically, mentally… just exhausted. He was not used to regrets and had never harbored so much ill will towards himself. Dwelling on it all was fatiguing in itself. 

His argument with Hermione was a constant presence in his mind. The terrible things he had said to her pained him repeatedly, when replayed in his mind. The remorse was eating away at him, causing him actual physical pain, far worse than when Hermione had slapped him… he had deserved that and he deserved the pain he felt still.

A tease! What prompted him to hurl such a contemptible slight to a girl who was the furthest thing from a tease he had ever known? Maybe she _had_ kissed him rather than James but he had been the one to initiate it. He initiated it and then threw it back in her face… all because he was too selfish to show any respect for his best friend's relationship. Because he allowed her joking remarks to wound his damned pride.

He hadn't meant a God damned word that he had shouted at her.

Hermione, on the other hand, had been undeniably accurate about something… James _was_ ten-times the man he would ever be.

He tried to convince himself that good would come of the awful words he'd said though, that there was a silver lining beyond this accursed cloud. Hermione would be driven back into James' arms where she belonged, he thought bitterly. His best friend would finally have the happiness he deserved.

And Sirius? Well, for now he had Callie… and someday maybe love, too. At least now, he had a certifiable excuse to stay away from Hermione. She could haunt his dreams and invade his every thought, but he would stay as far away from her as was possible from this point onward. That is what she wanted anyways.

With that depressing thought in mind, he swung around in bed and placed his feet heavily on the cold wooden floor.

James chose that moment to come into the dormitory from the showers, dressed in fresh robes, his hair still a bit damp. He saw Sirius and looked away quickly, rubbing a towel roughly over his head to finish drying his unruly black hair.

He picked up his glasses from the night stand and putting them on, glanced over at Sirius. James sat down purposefully across from him on his own bed.

"Padfoot," James addressed him seriously.

Sirius nodded in return. "Prongs."

"I want to know what happened between you and Hermione in London," James demanded coolly.

Sirius' head snapped up, suddenly alert. "Nothing of consequence," He stated, matching James' tone.

"Don't treat me like a fool, Padfoot. We've known each other too long for that," James shot back. "Something happened between you two and I want to know what it was."

"Why don't you go ask Hermione?" Sirius retorted, pulling himself to his feet.

"Well, you both have been awfully secretive about the whole thing. Neither of you will say a word about what happened and now you aren't speaking to each other at all! I'm left to my own devices to _guess_ what went on while you two were alone in your parents' house – "

"_That's_ what you think?! You think I shagged your girlfriend, James?"

James leapt to his feet, his face flushed with anger. He shouted "What would you think if you were me?! Do you really think I haven't seen the way you look her?"

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about!"

Remus entered from the bathroom just then and when he saw his friends standing face to face, feet apart, poised to fight, he ran over and shoved himself between them, forcing them away from one another. His lycanthropy lent immense strength when he chose to assert it.

"What the hell is going on?" He commanded in a furious growl.

Remus looked from James to Sirius, neither responded. Sirius heatedly shoved himself away from Remus but remained glaring fiercely at James.

"ANSWER ME!" James bellowed, struggling against the werewolf who was restraining him against his bedpost with both hands.

Sirius turned away, ignoring James completely.

James fought against Remus' grip and tried to lunge at Sirius. "Turn around and answer me!"

With a deep breath to maintain the little composure he had left, Sirius pulled a towel out of his trunk and tossed it over his shoulder as he retreated to the showers without another word.

Remus held James pinned against the bedpost for another moment until he was sure that his friend wouldn't go charging after Sirius. Finally, when James had stopped struggling, Remus pushed him back until he sat heavily on the bed.

"Tell me you two were not just fighting over a girl. Please!" Remus snapped. He loomed over James, exuding a distinctly frightening presence.

James was silent. He flexed his hands that had been balled up in fists and glared out the window.

"James!"

"What do you want me to say, Remus?" He asked in a tone of defeat. "He wants her. You know he does."

Remus shook his head angrily.

"You two are like brothers, James. You've been friends since first year and you are going throw that all away because of some girl?" He knew his words were harsh but there was a point to be made. He had to get through to his friend.

James jerked his head up to stare at Remus in disbelief.

"She isn't just _some girl_, Remus! Don't call her that!"

"Fine. But is she worth losing your best friend?"

"Some best friend he is," James grumbled under his breath.

"For Merlin's sake, James! Listen to yourself!" Remus shouted.

James buried his face in his hands and groaned in frustration at the battle that raged within him. Remus sat across from him and forced himself to take a calming breath.

"This is Sirius you're talking about," Remus repeated in a firm yet solemn voice.

"Does- Does he… love her?" James asked slowly, squeezing his eyes shut as though blocking out the impending answer he feared.

"Do _you_?" Asked Remus cleanly.

Taking off his smudged glasses, James looked up at his lycanthropic friend.

"I think I- I don't know. I'm just… drawn to her, I guess. It's strange… different," He managed to sputter, however, incoherently.

"Well," Remus began cautiously. "Then, it may be best if you figured out exactly how you feel about her before you engage in anymore dorm room brawls with Padfoot."

James opened his mouth to respond when his friend's words sank in and he ran a hand through his already ruffled hair.

"He told you didn't he? That he likes her…"

Remus raised his eyebrows to his friend, refusing to confirm or deny the question. Sirius had confided in him and he was not going to divulge his secrets.

"Does it matter?"

James furrowed his brow in confusion.

"Of course it matters, Moony! If he is expecting to… _compete _with me… for her then I need to know. If he is sneaking around behind my back, then I have to know."

Remus leaned forward and looked his friend dead in the eye.

"Compete with you? Sneaking around behind your back? Prongs, does any of that sound like something Sirius would actually do?"

James considered the question for a minute.

"No," He admitted. "No, it doesn't. But you have to agree that he hasn't exactly been himself lately."

"Maybe not. But after all these years, don't you think he deserves the benefit of the doubt?"

James nodded. "It's just that Sirius – "

"You have something you want to say to me?!" Boomed a voice from the doorway.

James' expression hardened as he stood up and turned to face Sirius. Clearly the shower had done nothing to assist him in relinquishing his fury… in fact, he looked angrier than he had when he had left.

"Yeah, I do, actually!" The anger boiling up in James once more.

Remus was prepared this time, however, and sprung into action before the two boys could begin another altercation.

"You two can talk when you've both calmed down. Prongs, why don't you go down to breakfast?"

"What?" James hissed at him.

"Go," Remus ordered threateningly.

James stared defiantly at Remus before throwing a glare at Sirius and stalking out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Remus shook his head. So much for progress, he thought sarcastically.

He turned to Sirius and raised an eyebrow. "Do you want to talk about it?" He offered.

"No," Growled Sirius, as he rummaged through his trunk, tossing miscellaneous possessions aside, searching for a shirt.

"You would rather fight then, is that it?" Remus retorted ironically.

Sirius, however, was in no mood for irony. He slammed the lid of his trunk shut and stormed past his friend.

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO!!" He bellowed, whirling around and smashing his fist into the window, shattering the pane of glass in an earsplitting crash. Wincing in pain, he withdrew his hand and screamed a curse to the skies through his rage-ragged breath.

Remus took a hold of Sirus' shoulders and sat him down resolutely, pulling his hand out so he could examine it.

"Madam Pomfrey will be thrilled to hear the explanation for this one," Remus sighed before forcibly taking his bleeding friend to the hospital wing.

* * *

Sirius' absence in every class that day was apparent. All day, their lessons were noticeably quieter at the distinct lack of the man that radiated charm and charisma, a man whom everyone took notice of when he entered a room. He was missed. 

Remus related to Peter and James what had happened right away. Peter immediately wanted to scurry up to the hospital wing to check on his friend but Remus stopped him, assuring him that Sirius was fine and being patched up by Madam Pomfrey. Indeed, it was James' reaction that Remus was most interested in. James' first instinct was to do exactly as Peter had intended to do, bolt upstairs to the infirmary. The reality of the injury and its motivating factor though, kept him firmly in his seat, unwilling to make amends after that morning's occurrence.

His concern was evident, however, and Remus could tell that he was fighting every urge to inquire for additional details.

Hermione too refused to allow herself to run to Sirius' side upon being informed of the incident. Her place was with James and she wouldn't permit herself to hurt him anymore than she already had.

It did not help that rumors had permeated the student body that James Potter and Sirius Black had fought. As they regretfully learned, their argument had been overheard throughout the Gryffindor Tower and the resultant breaking window created a dramatic flair that made the gossip mill turn ever faster.

By lunchtime, the Marauders were the subject of whispers, more so than usual, as speculation ran rampant that the two best friends, attached at the hip everyday for six years, had ended their friendship over a girl. Remus, James and Peter's refusal to acknowledge the rumors and questions that bombarded them throughout the day only seemed to fan the flames of scandal all the more.

Sirius did not make an appearance until dinnertime, when he turned up with a bandaged right hand and sat apart from his friends, at the far end of the Gryffindor table beside Frank. Before Sirius' concerned roommate could comment on his injury, Callie came rushing over from her own table, embracing her boyfriend tenderly, fawning over him.

Curious eyes throughout the room watched as Callie attempted to extract information from him, questions that Sirius was apparently refusing to answer as he shrugged off her doting gestures. Before even taking the time to eat anything, Sirius mumbled an apology to Callie and rose from the bench to leave. The pretty blonde tried to tag along but he pushed her back gently, shaking his head. Rising to his full height, he frowned in annoyance when he saw hundreds of eyes quickly look away as though they hadn't been watching his every move.

Remus promptly got up and strode over to him, clearly attempting to convince Sirius to stay for dinner as he gestured towards the open seats near their friends. During their hushed conversation, James glanced over at Sirius, both remaining expressionless due to the vast audience of eager onlookers. Sirius muttered an irritated goodbye to Remus and departed quickly, refusing to meet any of the prying stares that followed him.

The moment he disappeared into the Entrance Hall the room erupted in animated whispers. A hurt and confused Callie slowly returned to the Ravenclaw table where she sat dejectedly and while Remus took his previous seat among his housemates. He was joined momentarily by Nadine, who knew not to press him for details. She simply rubbed his shoulders comfortingly and allowed him his silence, raising her eyebrows threateningly at any one who dared attempt to extract gossip from him.

Beside Remus, James frowned at his plate, pushing his food around aimlessly with his fork. He felt someone shift into the vacant seat on his left.

"What's got Black's knickers in a twist?" Lily jested amicably, trying to assist in making light of the situation to incite the missing smile on James' face.

"Not now, Lily. Ok?"

"Oh… I'm sorry. I was just teasing…" She trailed off, her face growing warm with embarrassment. She really had only wanted to make him laugh.

James returned his attention to his plate giving Lily the opportunity to observe him; it had been so long since they had been this close. She had almost forgotten how nice he always smelled, the musky scent of his cologne sent a long forgotten waiver of yearning through her body and she wondered why she had to be so damned stubborn all those years that he wanted to be with her.

"Can I tell you something, James?" She asked tentatively.

James nodded though his eyes were had fixed on the door through which Sirius had exited and Hermione had yet to enter.

As much as Lily felt James deserved to know about Hermione's inadvertent affirmation of her feelings for Sirius, Lily knew that she couldn't tell him, it wasn't her place. Instead, she bypassed that topic and decided to be completely honest with him about a different matter entirely.

"I miss you," She blurted out quickly. That had been more difficult to admit than she had expected.

As if in slow motion, James turned his head to face Lily. He was certain he had misheard.

"Pardon?"

Lily chewed her bottom lip and fought to clarify. "I miss you, James. I miss… being friends with you..."

James withdrew slightly, with puzzlement. "We _are_ friends, Evans."

She emitted a brief, petulant laugh at his use of her surname. "Not like we were. For a while we were – but I suppose that was before…"

"Oh… " James stated, when he realized the point she was trying to make. "It's just that I'm with – "

"I know."

Lily smiled reluctantly. He was even more striking when flummoxed, she reflected. Her brevity did nothing to disguise the emotion she exuded. In short, her silence spoke volumes.

"Oh," James uttered again, the impact of what she'd said and even more so, what she hadn't said, bowled over him like a train at full speed.

Out of the corner of her eye, Lily saw Hermione enter the room and her face fell. James caught Lily's reaction and turned to see what had caused it. He did a double take, swiveling his head back and forth between the two girls, torn as to what he ought to do. The shock of Lily's confession had not worn off and he was intrigued to hear what more she had to say.

Lily rested her hand upon James' arm and cocked her head with a small smile.

"I hope you're happy, James," She said with the purest sincerity. Then as an afterthought, she added, "You really deserve it."

Lily stood and nodded hello as Hermione approached them. She surrendered the seat beside James with a slight gesture of her hand and took one final look at him over her shoulder before leaving the room.

James pulled his eyes away from Lily's retreating form and turned to Hermione, offering her a weary smile as she squeezed his hand.

"You look tired," She said with concern.

He nodded. "Yeah, it has been a really long day. Where have you been?" He asked soothingly.

"In the library," She answered. Then having noticed that one particular Marauder wasn't present, she added hesitantly, "How is Sirius?"

James tensed visibly and looked down at the table. "He's fine."

"That's good."

The fight between the two friends and Sirius' ensuing injury when combined with James' conflicting thoughts, had clearly taken a toll on him.

James looked around the room and noticed that they were still the subjects of a great number of stares. He sighed heavily. "Let's get out of here, eh?"

He pulled her to her feet, saying goodbye to Peter and clapping Remus on the shoulder as they walked outside into the cold evening.

They strolled wordlessly for quite a while before James stopped near the north bank of the lake. This was the place their walks usually led them when they would spend time together on the grounds. The dozens of times they had wandered about the lake with one another, they had shared a great deal about themselves and come to learn much about the other. James felt unusually protective of Hermione. More than physical attraction, he was aware of an unspoken connection between them, almost as though they had met before. Indeed, she seemed to understand him better than anyone, apart from his friends.

For Hermione, James provided a consoling presence that even before they had grown as close as they were, had been reassuring for the girl who was lost in a time other than her own. She had felt so strongly about him the moment her eyes first met his. She had been so sure it was love… even now she was certain it couldn't be anything but. Though, the bond they had formed surpassed thoughts of mere romance, moonlight and roses… they had a companionship.

As they stood together, listening to the rhythmic slapping of the water upon the shore, Hermione leaned into James and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, each drawing comfort from the other after a trying day.

Hermione shifted to rest her head against his chest and he secured his arms around her holding her close. The beating of his heart lulled her away from her worrisome thoughts.

Placing a finger under her chin, James tilted her face upward. He scanned her face pensively, this was the point when he had always backed away… hesitating to kiss her for reasons he had never been able to make any sense of. But, he thought, in light of everything that had taken place and all he had been willing to sacrifice for the girl before him, it was now or never.

He lowered his face towards her and let his lips brush against hers lightly, her warm breath cutting through the frosty air. Hermione closed her eyes but did not move.

When she didn't pull back, James dipped his head and drew her in as he covered her mouth with his own. Her hands moved up to his chest, the crisp night air chilling her body and she edged closer to his warmth. She parted her lips slightly and slowly returned the kiss. Timidly, it began to deepen as they experienced one another for the first time, shyly aware of their every movement.

They pulled apart gradually as the kiss slowed. James' hands were fixed on Hermione's shoulders as he drew a shaky breath, their eyes met in piercing stares.

"Oh…" James muttered for the third time that day, his forehead creased with perplexity.

"Yeah…" Returned Hermione, slightly awe struck.

Neither looked away from the other as they both pondered an identical unforeseen dilemma… something wasn't right.

* * *

**Review? Pretty please. **

* * *


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **I want to thank each and every one of the wonderful and amazing individuals who reviewed my last chapter. I was astounded by the response and I am so thankful. I do apologize for the delay in updating but I hope you'll forgive me :)

Thank you to Anasella Emm for dealing with my needy emails this week.

**Chapter Fifteen.**

* * *

_They pulled apart gradually as the kiss slowed. James' hands were fixed on Hermione's shoulders as he drew a shaky breath, their eyes met in piercing stares._

_"Oh…" James muttered for the third time that day, his forehead creased with perplexity._

_"Yeah…" Returned Hermione, slightly awe struck._

_Neither looked away from the other as they both pondered an identical unforeseen dilemma… something wasn't right._

* * *

As Hermione stood staring into James' hazel eyes, she tried to grasp what had just happened. Maybe she was delirious from lack of sleep or just confused because of the swarm of emotions she was battling but she was convinced she had seen Harry… Harry collapsing to the floor in pain… because of her. 

James was quiet as he pensively chewed his bottom lip. He offered Hermione a half-hearted smile and nodded his head in the direction of the school where they both walked in total silence.

* * *

"Harry!!" Ginny shrieked as he fell unconscious to the floor in the middle of the corridor at Hogwarts. 

Harry was slumped against the wall, his body limp.

Ron knelt down beside him and nudged his shoulder. "Harry! Wake up, mate!"

"Ron! He isn't breathing!" Ginny cried, leaning in close to him. "I'm going to get help!"

She tore down the hallway in search of someone who could help them.

Ron remained close beside his raven haired friend. He withdrew his wand and pointed it at Harry's chest. "Ennervate!" He commanded attempting to revive him.

Nothing happened.

The few agonizing moments that passed until Madam Pomfrey charged over seemed an eternity to Ron. Harry grew increasingly pale with each passing minute.

"Heavens!" The elder witch exclaimed when she saw Harry's lifeless body. "What's happened?"

"He just… just fell," Ginny explained, trying to restrain her tears.

"I don't think he's breathing," Ron said hurriedly.

Without another word, Madam Pomfrey levitated Harry's body and began rushing towards the hospital wing with Ron and Ginny following frantically after her.

Soon, Harry was back in the hospital wing having been administered countless potions and undergone numerous spells. He was breathing…. barely, but otherwise, there was no change.

Madam Pomfrey was more worried than most had ever seen her. Her usually faintly lined face was heavily creased with concern while she kept constant vigil over Harry as he lay motionless upon the hospital bed.

"You ought to go rest some, Gin," Ron said gently. "I'll stay with him."

Ginny was seated beside Harry's bed, clutching his hands and willing him to open his brilliant green eyes.

"No. I'm alright," She insisted.

He placed a hand on his sister's shoulder.

"Go on, Ginny. Why don't you go finish packing? We'll be heading back to Grimmauld Place as soon as – "

"We will go when Harry is able to travel," Ginny said firmly.

"I'm afraid you may be waiting for a while," Madam Pomfrey spoke up. "Mister Potter is not responding to any of the potions we have given him."

"So, what happens now?" Ginny asked breathlessly.

Madam Pomfrey responded gravely, "We wait."

Ginny eyes overflowed with tears. "No. No… there has to be more we can do. There has to be something!"

"I'm afraid not, Miss Weasley."

"Then I am going to find someone who _can_ help," Said the young red-headed girl. She took a long look at Harry before leaving the ward.

Ron sank into a chair numbly and looked at his best friend lying in eerie stillness. It was unfathomable that after everything Harry had been through, that it could all potentially end like this.

* * *

The following evening, Hermione clutched the troublesome, leather bound book to her chest as she walked slowly to Dumbledore's office. Completely immersed in her own thoughts, she allowed her feet to travel completely of their own accord. 

She rubbed her throbbing temples with one hand. There was simply too much to think about… too much to worry about… too much she didn't understand.

She didn't understand why she couldn't forget her feelings for Sirius. Even after their argument. She didn't even remember now what they had fought about but, though her pride stood firmly in the way, it was apparent that her feelings for him had progressed well beyond the physical. The book she held in her arms was a tangible reminder of that awful day at Grimmauld Place and she couldn't wait to be rid of it.

She didn't understand why her kiss with James hadn't resulted in fireworks and ecstasy but instead invoked that awful vision of Harry suffering. Instead it was disconcerting and numbing. It just wasn't right. The longer their lips had touched the longer Hermione waited for the rapturous sensation of a first kiss with someone one loved. Hermione had never really experienced that but, surely, there had to be more to it than that. And though neither had expressed this feeling aloud, she had a certain inclination that James felt the same way.

She didn't understand why these meetings with Dumbledore never made her feel any better. He always said the same thing. That she would know to do "the right thing". _The Right Thing_. That phrase was beginning to haunt her for she was positive that she was doing everything completely and incomprehensibly wrong. She wasn't sure if she could even bear to return to her own time, if it were even possible, and face the repercussions of her actions; a world without Harry Potter. But would it be better to remain in the past and allow James and Sirius' friendship to fall apart? To keep Lily Evans away from the man she wanted? These answers, Hermione did not know. She just did not understand.

And she hated not understanding.

Hermione was always the one who understood. The logical one. The reasonable one. But if she had learned anything over the past few months it was that she didn't know anything. Nothing in any of her school texts could have taught her how to cope with this situation. Ever the independent child, she had always relied on books for knowledge, and for the first time in her life, Hermione wished she could ask her mother for advice.

Her thoughts were interrupted as Hermione came face to face with the stone gargoyles guarding the Headmaster's office. She recited the password and trudged heavily up the spiral staircase, dreading hearing that prophetic phrase from the Headmaster's mouth: "You know to do the right thing".

She knocked feebly, hoping perhaps that he had forgotten their appointment and was away from his office.

"Come in," drifted the familiar voice from within.

Hermione pushed open the wooden door and greeted the Headmaster who observed her over his half-moon spectacles. She placed the heavy book upon his desk and took her usual seat before him.

Dumbledore lifted the book and thumbed through a few pages slowly before speaking, his eyes taking in the ancient symbols with increasing interest.

The grating sound of a throat clearing cut through the heavy blanket of silence that had swathed them. Hermione glanced around her in confusion, having thought they were alone.

Dumbledore, on the other hand, did not seem surprised at the interruption. Indeed, he responded without even looking up from the book.

"What is it Phineas?" He asked, always sounding ever so cordial.

Hermione looked up at the wall beside Dumbledore's desk as the portrait of Phineas Nigellus Black began to speak.

"Is that the book that the _muggle-born_ and my disowned great-great-grandson _stole_ from the noble house of Black?" He sniffed repugnantly.

Dumbledore smiled faintly.

"It is the book that was _borrowed_ from the Black's home, yes, Phineas. I am sure Young Mister Black will see to its proper return."

Phineas scoffed at his remark.

"I very much doubt that. Not that he would be able to figure out how to use that book properly, anyways. No interest in the dark arts, that boy."

"Then do you know how to use it?" Hermione asked in involuntarily. The words seemed to jump out of her mouth before she could stop them.

Highly offended at being addressed so insolently by this young girl Phineas turned away to face the Headmaster.

"I wonder, Albus, if you allow students to speak to _you_ in this manner? It certainly can not contribute to an effective learning environment. I, for one, shouldn't have even allowed muggle-borns to be accepted to Hogwa – "

"Have you something of use to explain about this book, Phineas?" Dumbledore interrupted, though his polite tone never faltered.

"The Great Albus Dumbledore hasn't figured it out yet?" the man in the portrait chuckled haughtily. "I suppose I shouldn't expect you to have any great knowledge of dark magic either, should I?"

"Indeed you are correct, Phineas," Dumbledore answered, looking up at the portrait for the first time. "Your knowledge of the dark arts far supersedes my own."

Apparently taking great pleasure in what he perceived as a rather lofty compliment, Phineas obliged.

"That book, Albus, predates even the Black Family line. Its conception is not known for certain though some believe it to have belonged to Salazar Slytherin himself. As you can see, the runes in which it has been transcribed are the predecessors to the more common runes studied today."

Dumbledore leaned back in his chair and steepled his long fingers as he listened to the former Headmaster speak boastfully.

"I am able to understand the antediluvian runes," Dumbledore said. "However, as they do not seem to do any more than explain the ancient history of dark magic, I wonder if they are not a deliberate façade used to disguise the book's true purpose."

Phineas raised an eyebrow, clearly impressed with Dumbledore's insight, but he said not a word. Dumbledore continued.

"Miss Granger, you have informed me that you were transported to this time while you were translating this book."

Hermione nodded, waiting to see what the Headmaster's train of thought would reveal.

"I believe, and perhaps Phineas would be so kind as to confirm or deny my accuracy, that this book has been bewitched to absorb curses upon whomever the owner wishes."

"Curse, Sir?" Hermione inquired, again confused at how the Headmaster was able to come to such a conclusion.

Dumbledore leaned forward and rested his elbows upon his desk.

"Yes, Miss Granger," He confirmed simply. Then turning once more to the portrait, he inquired an answer, "Phineas?"

"You are correct, Albus," Phineas said, showing some pride at the impressive dark magic contained in the book. "Whoever is the owner of the book is able to use it to contain curses. When the book is opened, the curse is released upon whomever is holding it at that time."

"As I suspected," Dumbledore stated. "Miss Granger, do you know who would have been the last person to have access to this book before you found it?"

She nodded. Of course, she knew. Sirius had read every single volume in the entire Grimmauld Place library during her fifth year when he was locked up inside the house. Undoubtedly, he would have come across this one as well.

"Yes, Sir. Siri- Um. .. Yes. I believe I do know who it would have been. But it doesn't make sense. He… I mean, this person would never have _cursed _me… and I wasn't cursed, exactly. I was sent back in time."

Dumbledore's eyes sparkled knowingly as they often did.

"Perhaps, this person had only heard of the book's powers through hearsay, passed down through generations and misunderstood its abilities? It may not have been meant for you at all."

Hermione racked her brain. Why would Sirius have placed a time-traveling curse within the book? Especially to return to this time?

"I can't think of a reason that a curse would have been cast, Headmaster," She eventually answered. "I don't believe that this person would resort to using dark magic for any reason."

"Sometimes, Miss Granger, desperation causes even the greatest of men to seek equally desperate measures," He watched her reaction intently.

Her brow furrowed and she chewed her bottom lip unconsciously. It was true that Sirius was impulsive and even reckless… but was he desperate enough to do something like this?

Phineas spared her from having to search for words by speaking up briskly.

"Are you implying, Albus, that one of my relatives wished someone to return to this year in time specifically? That hardly makes any sense! What about this year would have been important?"

As Phineas rambled on the answer suddenly came to her.

Hermione discovered how she had been sent into the past.

Sirius hadn't meant to curse anyone else by sending them back in time. Of course. He had meant to cast the spell for himself!

In this time, this year… Sirius was in his prime, he had his whole life ahead of him.

He _had_ been desperate when locked up in Grimmauld Place and he had found the fabled book in his family's library and tried to wish himself back to his school days, probably hoping that he could somehow prevent the tragedies of his friends' deaths and his imprisonment.

And Hermione, trying to find some key to lead Harry to Voldemort's horcruxes had unknowingly stumbled across the book, surely she was the first to open it since Sirius, and ended up here herself.

The realization sent shockwaves throughout her rendering her unable to speak. After all this time… she finally knew what had happened. And even worse, she understood how desperate Sirius must have been during that year. Her heart ached for him.

"Miss Granger?" Dumbledore's soft voice broke into her introspective reflection.

"Yes, Sir?" She answered, her voice quavering slightly with emotion.

"This has shed some much needed light upon your situation, has it not?" He asked kindly.

"Yes, Sir."

"Now, I do regret to inform you that I don't believe this book will do us any favors by returning you to your own time. If I am correct in assuming that you were the unforeseen victim of this bewitched book, it will then be far more involved to find a way to return you home."

"Indeed!" Boomed Phineas' voice again. "Only the rightful owner of the book is able to command anything from that ancient tome. Only the rightful owner of the Black estate. Not just some pilfering muggle-born girl and -"

"That's quite enough, Phineas," Dumbledore threatened, though somehow his voice remained as calm as ever. "Miss Granger, if you wouldn't mind leaving this book with me, I shall like to examine it further."

Hermione nodded meekly and rose to her feet.

"Thank you, Sir," She said quietly before turning and walking out of the office in a whirlwind of perplexity.

All the way back to her common room she tried to wrap her brain around everything that had been discovered. Even though she hadn't told Dumbledore that she knew Sirius Black in her own time, she had come to realize that the Headmaster had figured it out by now. He always was many steps ahead of everyone else.

But even beyond the recognition of how she had ended up in the past, she was astounded that Sirius had attempted to travel back to this time himself… to the last time he had been truly happy, she comprehended.

And after everything, Dumbledore still didn't believe there was a plausible way to send her home. All the better thought, she thought. Who knew if there was even a home for her to return to now after the mess she'd caused?

As she walked she replayed the conversation over and over in her head. Phineas had stated that "only the rightful owner of the book is able to command anything from that ancient tome. "_Only the rightful owner of the Black estate_."

Sirius had indeed been the rightful owner of the Black estate at that time and until his death when he had left the entire property… to Harry.

She froze in place.

Harry was now the rightful owner of the Black estate.

Harry was the only one who could bring her back.

Her brain was suddenly inundated with more questions. Would Harry be able to decipher the camouflaged power of the book if he even found it? Would Phineas aid him as he had her? If Harry did learn what the book was capable of, how much time would that leave her? Or had she already caused so much damage that there was no Harry to solve this mystery?

These innumerable queries plagued Hermione all the way back to the common room and throughout the night as she lay awake, staring out at the starry sky, wondering… wondering… if she would ever get any answers.

* * *

Remus Lupin was seated on his thread-bare sofa scouring the _Daily Prophet_ for any news that may be of use to the Order of the Phoenix. It had been too long between incidents. That alone was suspicious. 

It was as though the entire wizarding world had stopped to wait until Harry Potter was ready to fight.

A rapid knocking at his door boomed though his tiny flat.

He got to his feet stiffly and crossed to the weather worn door. He pulled it open to reveal Ginny Weasley standing before him, hand still poised to knock.

"Ginny?" Remus asked worriedly noticing that she had been crying. "Are you alright? What's wrong?"

She walked past him into his home and spun around to face him.

"Remus, you _have _to tell me how we can save Harry," She commanded though her voice was shaking steadily.

The older man closed the door and furrowed his brow.

"Has something else happened to Harry?" He asked anxiously.

"He's getting worse, Remus! None of the potions are working!"

"Merlin…"

"Merlin, is right!" Ginny cried, unable to control the tears of anger and fear. She stepped up to her former professor and gripped his hands. "Promise me that he isn't going to die, Remus."

He shook his head. "I'm sorry but you know I can't promise you that."

"Then what can we do, Remus? What can I do?!"

"There's nothing we – "

"TELL ME!!" She begged, staring up at him.

"Calm down, Ginny," Remus said firmly. "I've explained this to you already."

"So, you aren't going to try and help? You. The only person with the knowledge to help and you won't do it?" She spat, her mounting anger causing her to lash out at him.

Remus walked away and slammed a tea kettle onto the stove furiously.

"I refuse to have this conversation with you again!" He argued, looking weary despite his growing frustration.

"Is this the life you want, Remus?!" Ginny retorted threateningly. "You want it to stay this way?! Voldemort growing stronger by the day while Harry gets weaker? You, devoting your life to the Order so you don't have to face Tonks or anything to do with your own life?!"

Remus turned his back on her as she spoke. When she had finished, he faced her and answered with a growl, "You are completely out of line, Ginevra."

Ginny knew she was had gone too far.

"I'm sorry, Remus. I – "

She was interrupted though when a familiar Patronus flew in through the window.

Kingsley Shacklebolt's deep voice emanated from the illuminated lynx Patronus.

"A large group of suspected Death Eaters have gathered in Kent. Contact Order at once. Meet at Headquarters."

The second Kingsley's voice faded, the lynx dissolved into silvery vapor.

Remus did not waste a moment, rushing over to grab his cloak and wand he turned to Ginny with his hand on the door.

"I would help if I could."

"I know," Ginny answered apologetically.

In one swift motion, Remus flung on his cloak and stepped out the door. He apparated away just as the tea kettle began to whistle.

* * *

Early that Saturday morning the castle was abuzz with activity. Students were busy bundling up, eating hasty breakfasts and readying themselves for the last trip into Hogsmeade Village before the Christmas holiday. 

Hermione sat in the Great Hall, picking at a piece of toast, while she waited for James and Remus to come down from Gryffindor Tower. The two boys planned to go into town with her and Nadine that day. Sirius, no doubt, had plans with Callie and the boys had all wondered as to Peter's whereabouts recently.

Hermione had reluctantly kept her mouth shut when this topic had arisen, hoping to find the right moment to encourage the Marauders to reach out to their less popular companion.

But as James and Sirius were still not speaking… and neither were Hermione and Sirius, it would pose a problem to convey anything to them as a group. Hermione sighed to herself, what a mess she had caused. The more she thought about it, the stronger her convictions were that she would have to be the one to, at least attempt to, fix it. No longer could she burden Dumbledore with her dilemma nor could she expect Harry to put together all the pieces of this convoluted puzzle.

She continued to half-heartedly eat her breakfast when she saw Lily enter the Hall laughing and smiling more brightly than Hermione had seen her in quite a while. Hermione did not have to wait to discover the source of Lily's happiness as James walked in after her, also laughing enthusiastically. Strangely, Hermione found that she did not feel even the vaguest twinge of jealousy at the sight of the two who were so clearly happy to be on good terms once again.

Upon seeing Hermione already seated at the table, James offered Lily what seemed to be an apologetic shrug and parted from her to sit beside Hermione whom he greeted warmly.

"Morning!" He smiled widely.

"Good morning," Hermione greeted, genuinely happy to see him. Despite the blatant lack of romantic spark left between them and everything else on her mind, she found that she still felt rather cheerful at his presence. She smirked at him, "You're in awfully good spirits for so early in the morning."

His smile wavered momentarily as his eyes shifted from Hermione to Lily seated a short ways down the table and back.

"Er…," He laughed with a slight discomfort as though he had been caught misbehaving in class. He recovered quickly though and said, "It's a Hogsmeade trip. Of course, I'm in good spirits! Now if only Moony would hurry up, we can head off."

As though the werewolf's finely tuned senses had heard James' very words, Remus chose that moment to walk into the Great Hall flanked by Sirius and Peter.

"Wormtail! Where've you been, mate? We thought maybe you'd been eaten by Mrs. Norris," James teased the pudgy boy with sandy blond hair.

Peter emitted a high pitched squeal of a laugh and sat down beside James.

Remus and Sirius took their seats opposite James and Peter. As had become routine over the past few days, James and Sirius acted as though the other was not there at all.

Hermione watched Sirius as he too slowly dissected a slice of toast with a lack of enthusiasm, just as she had done. Over her shoulder she heard Callie call his name and he looked up, sending her a wink and a trademark grin that disappeared the moment he looked back at his plate.

Sirius felt her eyes on him and forced himself not to look at her, but as soon as he noticed her look away in his peripheral vision, he gazed over at her. He noticed with a sliver of hopefulness that she was seated slightly further from James than usual but that slight optimism slipped away when he detected how cheerful James was that morning to be spending the day with his girlfriend. Though what he didn't see was that the actual reason James was smiling so brightly because of the attractive red head seated a down the table.

"So, Moony! Are you ready for your first Hogsmeade trip with Nadine? Planning to take her up to the Shrieking Shack to do some howling, eh?" James joked, laughing loudly and nudging Peter with his elbow suggestively.

Remus blushed furiously and threw a furtive glance in Hermione's direction indicating that James should watch what he said, unbeknownst to any of them, Hermione, obviously, knew Remus' secret already.

"No, Prongs," Remus answered sensibly. "We'll just be doing some Christmas shopping and probably head to the Three Broomsticks with you all."

"Fair enough," James said with a smile. Then turning to Hermione, he concluded, "Shall we go then?"

Soon, Hermione and James were joined by Remus, Nadine and Peter on the chilly walk into Hogsmeade. Sirius had gone to join Callie with whom he would be spending the day. The five students chatted easily about classes and the forthcoming holidays as they walked, eager to reach the village where they could seek refuge from the cold inside one of the many shops.

Their first stop was Honeydukes where dozens of students were excitedly purchasing last minute gifts for friends and family members. Hermione hung back and watched as the holiday frenzy buzzed her. Her thoughts trailed back to the Christmas she spent at Grimmauld Place in her fifth year, surrounded by Harry, the entire Weasley family, Sirius, Remus and a number of others who made up their large, extended family; that had been her favorite Christmas to date. And as they often did when she thought of that Christmas, her memories of the kiss between her and Sirius came flooding back.

_She had been heading downstairs to the kitchen when she ran into Sirius on the staircase. He was still in the midst of his jovial Christmas cheer and had slowed to greet her with what she now knew as his legendary grin. So completely did she remember the way her pulse began racing and her stomach fluttered at the sight of that smile… that smile that made her feel that she was the only female on Earth. She remembered it so vividly though because his smile had always__ and __would always__ have that very__ effect__ on her. _

_He had nodded his head upwards and glanced with his eyes at the mistletoe hanging from one of the mounted house elf heads just a foot above his head. Hermione had scarcely dared believe that he was hinting at what he seemed to be insinuating … she felt her face flush with heat as Sirius leaned into her. __She backed into the wall and he moved closer still, whispering that absurd line into her ear, the same one she had heard him say to Callie. She had even known it was ridiculous at the time bit she didn't care, she wasn't aware of anything except for the deliciously forbidden Sirius Black whose lips hovered inches away from hers. _

_He'd braced himself with both hands on the wall as he placed a feather-light kiss upon her lips before rising up, winking at her and continuing on his way up the stairs. Hermione, on the other hand, had apparently lost all control of her faculties as her legs turned to gelatin and her stomach did cartwheels around her rib cage. He had barely touched her and her entire body was betraying her every conscious effort to regain control. Only when she heard Mrs.Weasley calling everyone in for dinner, did Hermione finally manage to descend the remaining stairs to the kitchen._

"Hermione?"

A deep voice broke into her daydream. She looked up to see Remus looking at her with his soft amber eyes. He grinned his sweet lopsided smile at her.

"Where were you, eh?"

Hermione shrugged. "Just a bit homesick is all. With the holidays…"

She directed her eyes away from his and Remus put his arm around her shoulders, offering her a friendly hug. At that moment, she could have forgotten she was lost in the past, because Remus was just as comforting and familiar as his older self for whom she held so much respect.

Taking a few deep, calming breaths, Hermione managed a smile.

"That's better," He said kindly. "Come on, everyone else is outside."

Remus, ever the gentleman, lead her out of the sweet shop and onto the lane. Bustling students swarmed around them when they heard Sirius' voice shout over the dull roar of the crowd.

"Hey! Watch where you're going, McNair!!"

They were immediately thrown into defense-mode. Remus grabbed his wand and shoved his way towards the center of the gathering group with Hermione at his heels. When he pushed his way into the the circle, he found Sirius standing opposite Damien McNair, glaring viciously at one another. Frank Longbottom was angrily shouting at another Slytherin and James, Peter and Nadine burst in a moment later.

McNair lunged forward to shove Sirius.

Callie screamed and James jumped in front of his best friend, completely disregarding the fact that they weren't speaking, and allowed McNair to shove him back into the surging crowd of onlookers rather than Sirius.

"Get out of the way, Potter!" Sirius snarled.

McNair emitted a menacing cackle.

"Oh that's rich! Don't tell me you and your boyfriend have broken up, Black."

James whirled around to face Damien, pulling out his wand and aiming it at the Slytherin. Rodolphus Lestrange and Bellatrix Black chose that moment to stroll out of the crowd and into the center of the action. Regulus appeared then too but lingered near the edge of the group rather than marching out in front.

Remus, sensing that this scuffle was quickly getting out of hand, rushed forward as well with his own wand out but held at his side, followed quickly by Peter. Hermione and Nadine began to follow but Remus held up his hand forcibly, stopping them both dead in their tracks.

Sirius was livid. He could fight his own battles, especially against his little brother's Death Eater cronies.

"Get out of here, all of you!" He shouted at his friends and housemates, standing fiercely in his defense. Not one of them moved, though James glared back at him.

Bellatrix sauntered up slowly, laughing evilly.

"Want to take all of us on by yourself, Cousin?" She sneered dangling her wand in front of her Sirius' face.

The moment Hermione saw Bellatrix approaching Sirius emitting that maniacal laugh, she sprang forward, wand at the ready. She opened her mouth to hurl a curse at the girl who would one day take Sirius' life and destroy the only family Harry had ever known. Before she could utter a sound, she was grabbed by the back of her sweater and pulled back forcefully to the edge of the group.

She looked up, shaking with adrenaline and jumped when she saw Sirius glowering down at her, still maintaining a firm grip on the fabric of her sweater which was balled in his fist.

"I said, get out of here," He growled in a dangerously low voice.

Hermione glared back at him defiantly and did not budge.

"Suit yourself," Sirius spat before letting go of her and turning back to his cousin. "Back off, Bella, this isn't your fight."

"I told you this wasn't over," Rodolphus Lestrange spoke up, stepping forward from behind his future wife. "And assuming your girlfriends aren't going to come to your rescue again, this time we'll finish what we starte-"

"Incendio!" McNair interrupted with a commanding shout, his wand pointed directly at Nadine, vengeance gleaming in his bulging eyes.

The leg of her jeans went up in flames that Remus quickly extinguished with an 'Aguamenti' charm.

Sirius ran out deliberately in front of Remus who had turned to fire back at McNair.

"Locomotor Mortis!" He yelled, causing Damien McNair's legs to bind beneath him as his forward momentum sent him flailing to the floor.

"Stop that! Stop that, right now!!" A high pitched voice penetrated through the mass of raucous students. Tiny Professor Flitwick was forcing his way through the group with great difficulty.

"Break it up, boys! Go on!" He scolded them as he finally reached the center of the tense circle. They all remained in their fighting positions, none of them wanting to be the first to secede.

But Professor Flitwick was too angry to be concerned with the petty pride of teenage wizards.

"You heard me, Mister Lestrange! Help Mister McNair up and off you go! That goes for you, as well, Mister Black, Mister Potter," and heaving an exasperated sigh as he took in the entire entourage of Gryffindors ready to fight, "and the rest of you. Go on."

The diminutive professor stood waving away the onlookers and waited until the very last of the students had gone off to enjoy the rest of their day. Once reassured that the fight was completely broken up, he walked away, shaking his head to join his fellow teachers for a much needed drink.

Sirius apparently had a similar idea because after storming away from the fracas and being looked over worriedly by Callie whom he stubbornly reassured that he was unhurt, he stomped into the Three Broomsticks and sat heavily at a booth to order the strongest drink they would serve him.

Outside on the street, James paced furiously back and forth as Remus looked over Nadine's leg to ensure there were no burns from the spell McNair had thrown at her.

"Are you _sure_ you don't need to go to the hospital wing?"

"I'm fine, Remus," Nadine said for the fourth time, though she couldn't help but smile softly at his considerate nature.

"Are you alright, James?" Remus asked, transferring his attention to his bespectacled friend.

"Fine," James said through gritted teeth.

"Calm down, Prongs," Remus advised approaching his friend. "Those Slytherins have always been – "

"What the hell was he on about!? Picking a fight with those gits? He could've gotten himself into loads more trouble if we hadn't been there!" James ranted, still pacing.

"We were only trying to help," Agreed Peter, chiming in from beside Hermione and Nadine.

Remus laid a hand on James' shoulder in the comforting manner that was unique to Remus alone and looking between his two friends said, "What matters is that we _were _there and nothing worse happened."

James nodded solemnly, though still deeply troubled by the ongoing argument between him and Sirius.

"Alright," Remus concluded. "Let's go inside and have a drink, shall we?"

The five friends entered the pub only to find it packed with students trying to stay out of the cold. In the middle of the room there was a small table for two beside another larger table. Remus offered the smaller table to James and Hermione, leading Nadine and Peter to the second table where they were soon joined by Lily who was relieved to find an open seat so she would not have to impede upon Frank and Alice any longer.

Hermione sat quietly while James went up to the bar to order a hot cocoa for her and a butterbeer for himself. She hadn't said a word since the argument with the Slytherins and the image of Sirius' glare resonated in her head. He was still furious with her, as was evident in his every action. Why had she even tried to help him? She could not control herself around Bellatrix' gloating sneer. But the anger she comprehended in his eyes when he had pulled her away from the fight plainly read: unforgivable. He would never forgive her for what she had said.

As angry as she still was with Sirius, her willpower waned whenever she found herself within close proximity to him.

And now she had come between him and James.

Hermione sat back and observed the room, the people that had come to mean so much to her in such a short time. She looked up as James crossed back across the room from the bar, drinks in hand. She watched as his eyes met Lily's, the warm smile that he saved just for her, the concerned expression upon Lily's face.

She watched as Sirius sat brooding in a nearby booth beside a window and she watched while he and Callie silently drank their butterbeers.

Hermione took it all in. She glanced from Sirius to James to Lily and back to James. And in that moment, she could see with crystal clarity, the lives she was tearing apart and the future she was destroying

She knew what she needed to do. Just as Dumbledore had said… she had to do the right thing. For the greater good, she had to leave. As long as she remained there, she posed a threat to the futures of everyone she cared about. So she would leave. She didn't know where she would go… she didn't care. But leave, she would. And she would do it now.

"James," She began slowly. "I… I can't do this anymore…"

"What?" James asked, his face reading more surprise than confusion. "You can't do what?"

"I can't… this is wrong. It isn't supposed to be like this."

"I don't know what you're saying, Hermione," He stated again. "I know the other night was awkward but-"

"Right!" She interrupted, shaking her head. "It wasn't _right_."

James leaned forward, reaching across the table and took Hermione's hands in his.

"Hermione," He began, looking her directly in the eyes. "I think you are amazing and I'm not sure what happened with that… kiss… I know it certainly wasn't what I thought it would be but…"

"James," Hermione waited until he looked back at her. "Do you honestly feel that this, you and I… does it feel right to you?"

James squeezed her hands and ran his thumb back and forth over hers as he considered his response.

"No… no, it doesn't," He admitted earnestly. "But I genuinely believe that… there is _something_ between us…"

"There is," Hermione agreed, wishing she could be persuaded to change her mind. But she couldn't turn back now. _'You know to do the right thing,'_ Dumbledore's voice repeated in her head. So she pressed on. "And that's why I can't stay here. I _have_ to leave. It isn't supposed to be like this, James."

"Hermione, please stop saying that," James urged.

"I can't… I can't tell you why, James… but I have to go." She pulled her hands away but James stopped her.

He could tell by her determined demeanor that by 'leaving', her intent was that they would never see each other again.

"Is this because of Sirius?" He asked, his gaze fixed upon hers, both acutely aware that Sirius was seated nearby.

Hermione absorbed his question slowly. "What?" She whispered.

"I know, Hermione," He said deliberately.

She shook her head slowly. "There is nothing between Sirius and I…"

James smiled at her in sad acknowledgment.

"Hermione, don't."

"Don't wha-"

"Don't. Don't do that. I _know_… and it's alright."

Tears began to stream down her face. "Oh, James… I'm so sorry. I never meant for… But it doesn't matter. I can't stay anyways."

"Are you going to tell him?" James asked.

"What?" She asked in confusion through her tears.

James' eyes were beginning to well up now too. "Are you going to tell Sirius that you're leaving?"

She shook her head and took a deep shaky breath. "I can't. I just have to go. I can't explain it all to you… you just have to believe me. Someday maybe you'll understand why."

"I _don't_ understand," He argued plainly.

"I'm doing the right thing, James. You have to trust me. It has to be this way." She rose slowly to her feet.

"Wait. Now? You're leaving now?" He rushed to ask her in a hushed voice, pulling her back into her seat.

Raising her eyes from the floor to look at him, she nodded.

"I have to. If I wait another second, I might not have the strength to do this."

"Hermione, please," James begged. "Will you…"

"What?" She asked breathlessly.

"Will you say goodbye to him?" James requested. "You can't leave without saying goodbye to him."

Hermione just shook her head again. "I can't, James. I… can't."

"So, this is it?" His voice too began to quiver.

"Yeah…" She uttered, under her breath.

James stared at the young witch across from him and saw her in a new light. He knew he might never understand why she was doing this but he did finally know one thing for certain.

He took a long deep breath and spoke the words he had long wanted to say only now realizing for the first time that he did _not_ mean them in the way he had once thought.

"I love you, Hermione."

She leaned forward in her chair, tears streaming freely down her cheeks.

"I love you too, James."

As they looked at one another they shared a poignant smile.

For they both knew theirs was not a romantic love… it was a deep, familial love, an inherent bond and a desire to protect one another. They were family… siblings… friends.

So, gathering every ounce of strength she could muster, Hermione stood and walked out of the Three Broomsticks… away from James… and away from Sirius Black. She would do what she should have done months ago and walk away.

She would sacrifice the life she had begun in this time to give her friends a future… to give Harry a future.

Unbeknownst to James and Hermione, the realization of their feelings had been overheard by two others who happened to have been crossing to the bar within earshot. Though all these two heard, were the declarations of love… and not the platonic enlightenment behind them. They hadn't heard the goodbyes or any other words the two had shared. All they heard was "I love you".

Lily Evans' and Sirius Black's eyes met over James' head as he sat, unaware. A silent commiseration passed between them.

Lily watched Hermione disappear out the door and sank down into her chair, a lump rising steadily in her throat. Well, that was it. James loved Hermione… And she would have to move on. Excusing herself hurriedly from Remus, Nadine and Peter who had not been privy to James and Hermione's words; Lily, too, exited the Three Broomsticks.

Sirius felt as if the very breath had been knocked out of his lungs. Part of him wanted to laugh… the bitterness was almost too much to bear. He watched Hermione's retreating form silently. As the words he had heard both Hermione and James confess echoed over and over in his mind, a wave of defeat washed over him and he made a decision.

Swallowing with great difficulty, he turned back and returned to his seat across from Callie.

Callie quirked an eyebrow at him as he slid into the booth.

"Did you forget something?" She asked with a pleasant smile and a playful laugh, indicating his empty hands. "Where are the drinks?"

"Callie… we need to talk," Began Sirius, disregarding her question.

"About what?" She said casually.

He paused. She deserved honesty.

"I can't be with you anymore," He said quietly.

Her head snapped up.

"Excuse me?" She posed the question genuinely believing that she had misheard him.

"I said, I can't be with you anymore."

"But… why?"

The unexpected announcement had taken her by surprise though Sirius was deliberating over the very same question himself.

He opened his mouth to respond but found that he didn't know how to answer her.

"Sirius? Is it… someone else?" Callie asked hesitantly.

Slowly raising his eyes to meet hers, he answered, "Yes."

"Oh…"

"I'm sorry," He stated earnestly.

"So… that's it, then?"

He nodded. "Yes."

She leaned forward and observed him, reluctantly posing another question. "Do you… do you love her?"

Did he love her? He asked himself. But he knew the answer. He had known for longer than he would wish to admit.

"Yes, I do," He confirmed aloud for the first time. He loved Hermione.

Callie nodded almost imperceptibly. In truth, she wasn't shocked by his affirmation. Sirius had not been himself lately and it did make sense that his distractedness had been the result of his transferred affections. And aside from his obvious sincerity, he was too handsome to be angry with for long.

"Well, then… um… good luck, I guess," She conceded with a halfhearted smile.

Sirius looked at the door through which Hermione had exited then over to James who had taken Lily's vacated seat at Remus' table.

"I think it may be a bit too late for luck," He said with a bitter laugh. "But thank you, Callie."

She stood up, wringing the strap of her purse in her hands awkwardly.

"You're welcome, Sirius. I think I'm going to go… but I'll see you around?"

"Of course," Sirius confirmed as he stood too.

Callie reached up on her toes and placed a brief kiss on his cheek.

"Bye," She finished softly.

Sirius didn't watch her go. Instead, he sat down again, knowing that it was too late for him and Hermione, regardless of Callie. Silently berating himself for letting James be the man Hermione had fallen in love with, for concealing his feelings for Hermione behind his anger and for being jealous of James, in the first place.

He would have to resign himself to living with the unrequited emotions for however long was necessary. Hermione loved James… and Sirius would not stand in their way. Perhaps, eventually, he would move on, he thought, though he knew that was about as likely as a snowstorm in July.

"Hey, Padfoot," said Remus' tranquil voice as he approached Sirius.

Sirius nodded in acknowledgement.

"Why don't you come join us?" He asked, gesturing to the table in the middle of the room at which Nadine, Peter and James were seated.

"No. It's alright, Moony, I think I'll just…" He trailed off, not sure what to do exactly.

Remus shoved his hands in his pockets and glanced around the room.

"Where is Callie?"

"She left," Sirius answered plainly.

"Left? What happened? Don't tell me you tried to drag _her _off to the Shrieking Shack?" Remus smirked at his friend.

Sirius gave Remus a tight-lipped smile.

"No… we broke up, actually."

Comprehension descended upon Remus' face.

"What did you say?"

"That there was someone else."

Remus started to ask, "Is it – "

"Who else," Sirius interrupted. They both knew that there was only one person it could be. "It doesn't matter though. Hermione and James…"

Remus exhaled heavily.

"There is no 'Hermione and James', Padfoot."

"There is," Sirius insisted. "I heard them. She loves him – "

"She's leaving," Remus interjected.

Having already begun his resignation, Sirius' thought process was stopped short.

"Wait. What do you mean she's leaving?"

"That's what she told James. She said she had to go… somewhere, I don't know."

Sirius looked past Remus and saw James watching him from the table.

"But she and James… they're – "

"They're over," He answered. When Sirius looked as though he would argue, he added, "They're friends."

Sirius' heart began to beat rapidly. She and James _weren't_ together.

"So, they're over?" He couldn't seem to absorb that fact.

From the table across the way, James still remained seated, watching the realization come over Sirius.

"They are over, Padfoot," Remus repeated. "And now she's leaving."

Sirius stood abruptly and began pacing back and forth in front of his friend.

"Where is she going?"

"James doesn't know. She didn't really even say goodbye, I guess."

Sirius stopped pacing. "You mean, she is leaving _now_?"

"Yes, Padfoot," Remus nodded solemnly. "And she isn't leaving… she's gone."

"But… I never told her that I… I didn't apologize for…" He murmured, his thoughts coming to him too quickly to verbalize.

"Then try to catch her before she goes," Offered another voice.

Sirius looked up. James was standing in front of him.

"James, I – "

"Just go," James advised.

Sirius looked between his friends intently. There he stood, perched upon on an uncertain precipice. He knew he could not turn back.

And so he leapt.

He backed away from his friends and strode out of the pub. His feet hit the road and he began running towards the school not knowing what would he would say if he reached her in time or if he was already too late.

His run became a sprint, the pounding of his shoes upon the ground matching the pounding of his heart, beat for beat.

* * *

**We're getting close to the end now! Your Reviews are My Fuel!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

I officially have the most amazing readers on the planet. I was blown away by the reviews, you guys! A most sincere thanks to each and every one of you who took the time to share your thoughts with me. As always, thank you to AnasellaEmm for her constant reassurance and support and for responding to my countless emails.

**A/N: To be clear, the italics towards the end are Harry's words**** and actions**

**Chapter Sixteen.**

* * *

_Sirius looked between his friends intently. There he stood, perched upon on an uncertain precipice. He knew he could not turn back. _

_And so he leapt._

_He backed away from his friends and strode out of the pub. His feet hit the road and he began running towards the school not knowing what would he would say if he reached her in time or if he was already too late. _

_His run became a sprint, the pounding of his shoes upon the ground matching the pounding of his heart, beat for beat._

* * *

Sirius ran on. Past the bustling shops of Hogsmeade Village. Past the blurred faces of his fellow students. 

He raced through the streets peering over the heads of his classmates looking left and then right with no sign of the woman he sought. Carrying him with each stride was the blind longing to hear her voice, soft and assured, and all the hope that would come with it; to see her face, the very image that had been burned into his subconscious… his final waking thought each night.

He no longer cared that they weren't speaking. His anger and their argument meant nothing now and the pain it had inflicted upon him dissolved with every promising step.

Finally, he reached the gates of the school. Never slowing for even a second, Sirius raised his eyes to the heavens in a silent prayer that he would find her in time.

* * *

Hermione folded the last of her few items of clothing and placed it into her trunk. Wiping away the stray tears that she hadn't realized had been streaming down her face, she took one final glance around her dormitory and was surprised to find that she had truly come to feel at home in this strange time. 

Now she would leave and become a stranger yet again… wherever she ended up. Perhaps she would take a job in Diagon Alley or even try living in muggle London. Whatever happened, she knew she was doing what was best for the future.

She closed her trunk and choked back a sob as she latched it shut. This was it.

As she turned to the door, a purple quill on Lily's bedside table caught her attention and a thought occurred to her. It was risky, yes, but it could mean that Lily and James lived to see Harry grow up… it could mean that Remus didn't have to live a life of solitude and, most of all, it could mean that Sirius was able to become the man he was always meant to become.

Throwing open her trunk, Hermione snatched up a spare bit of parchment and ran over to the table, grabbing Lily's quill and ink.

She placed the point of the quill to the paper and halted. What was she to write? She couldn't explain in a letter that she was from the future… who would believe her?

In hopes that the right words would miraculously appear before her, Hermione eyed the parchment intently, chewing on her bottom lip. Her eyes travelled to the large window that overlooked the grounds and fell upon a most familiar sight: The Beech tree, beneath which the Marauders spent innumerable hours together and where she and Sirius had shared their first and only kiss.

And then the words came to her. Furiously, she began scribbling her final message to those she would leave behind.

* * *

Sirius tore through the grand doors of the castle and into the Entrance Hall dodging left and right the students that were milling about enjoying their day off. There was no sight of her. 

Continuing up the grand staircase, he swore under his breath when he saw the next set of stairs begin to move. Not even a moving staircase could stop him though. He finally knew, with crystal-clear certainty that it was Hermione and Hermione alone that he could not waste another moment without, so he sped up and just barely managed to reach the stairs.

Sirius climbed half a dozen staircases without paying any heed to where he was going. Another extended corridor stretched out before him and he ran the length of it in a frenzied haze when he finally arrived at the entrance to Gryffindor Tower. He spoke the password with shallow breath and flew through the entrance, searching the common room hurriedly for her familiar face. But she was no where to be found.

Without a second's hesitation, he bolted up the stairs to the girls' dormitory.

* * *

As Hermione scrawled the words of advice upon the parchment, tears had begun trailing freely down her face. For the first time in her life she truly, wholly and beyond the shadow of a doubt knew exactly what she wanted, what she needed, and now all she could think was that she would never have the chance to tell him. 

It was likely she could never return to her own time, though the hope that she could change it for the better was worth this sacrifice. Maybe one day Sirius Black would know how much she truly loved him. At least she hoped. Perhaps, it would make up for the fact that their last words to one another had been so hateful.

The final words of her hasty letter flowed from the tip of the quill when a voice brought her script to a standstill.

"Hermione?" The unforgettable deep voice sounded from behind her.

Her breath caught in her throat. She hardly dared believe it could be. Turning away from the window, an exalted sob escaped Hermione's mouth when she finally laid her eyes upon Sirius' weary and yet, still, beautiful face as he stood tall in the doorway. The forgotten parchment fluttered to the floor behind her.

Before Hermione could breathe a word he soared towards her, his dark gray eyes shining with emotion and wild, unyielding desire. Reaching her in mere seconds, he buried his hands in her long, curly locks and crushed his lips to hers, stealing the breath from her very lungs.

Sirius explored her mouth fervidly, the sweet taste of her kiss mingled with salty tears. Hermione clutched the front of his robes desperately to prove to herself this was not a dream and she kissed him back more ardently.

Sirius swept her up in his strong arms as though she weighed no more than a dried leaf. Their kiss never ceased as he lay her down upon her bed, lowering himself over her. They broke apart breathlessly and he took in the anticipated sight. Her long hair splayed out on the pillow beneath her head and she gazed up at him beneath hooded eyes. She literally took his breath away.

Their lips met once more in a bruising kiss.

Their bodies flush against one another; he rested above her and searched her features as though he was seeing her for the first time. He cupped her face and placed a soothing kiss upon her forehead.

"I'm so sorry," He said hoarsely, caressing her face with his hand, as a tear escaped and trailed down his face.

Hermione brushed it away with her thumb.

"Me too," She whispered and pulled him down to kiss him again. Passion burned with a fiery rush as she opened her mouth to him, their yearning hunger could not be contained any longer and the months of desire over took them.

Sirius pulled her sweater off over her head followed by his own shirt and tossed them aside. Drawing her against him he reveled in the sensation of her warm, skin upon his.

They both not only desired one another but at that moment they desperately needed the other. Both were seeking reassurance and treasuring the realization that they were together, at last. They had wasted so much time… everything within them was urging them to make the most of this experience.

Sirius' hands explored Hermione's smooth body. His hands tickled her sides as they came to rest at the waistband of her jeans. Hermione quickly flicked open the buttons of her own pants and Sirius pulled them down over her hips, taking in the white satin panties that were revealed.

Sirius kissed her neck and nipped at her earlobes. His fingers grazed her shoulders, traced down her chest and around her back where he found the clasp of her bra. In moments he had removed that too and he caressed the soft swells of her chest within his large hands. Lowering his mouth gently over one breast, his tongue massaged the sensitive skin causing pleasure to spear though Hermione's body.

Urgency incited her to touch him in return. She fought with the buckle on his belt until Sirius relieved her. She then unbuttoned his pants and slid them down his muscular frame.

His arousal strained against the thin fabric of his boxers and she rolled her hips against him, eliciting an anticipatory groan from the gorgeous man above her.

When she began easing his boxers down, Sirius looked down at her and his eyes darkened with encouragement. With one sweep of his hand, he freed her of the white panties that had caused his heart to skip a beat.

All that remained were the two of them, clutching one another tightly. Her body fit against his in all the right places. Her breasts firm against his chest. His length teasing her with eagerness.

Upon the threshold, their eyes met in silent question, seeking affirmation. But they both knew. There was no going back now.

Time fell away to yearning when his mouth sought hers. Drawing her out of herself and into him, Sirius' lips parted and her heartbeat quickened. She wanted more of him.

His breath solidified in his throat as he slid inside of her gently, Hermione's body reacting to him in all the right ways. She raised her hips against him and he moaned. Tentative at first then bolder, they began moving together, matching the other's pace. His moan darkened into a growl.

Hermione gripped his broad shoulders as she brought herself up to meet his thrusts. Her nails dug into his skin. The sensation of their bodies finally coming together as one overwhelmed every one of her senses and she threw back her head, arcing into his body.

He kissed her exposed throat. Sucked the sensitive skin.

Hermione bit her lip to keep from crying out.

Ecstasy.

Increasing their rhythm, Sirius thrust more solidly.

He had never known such feral pleasure. Watching Hermione, eyes closed, biting her bottom lip and equaling him with each motion of their passionate convergence was the closest to heaven he had ever felt.

His rhythmic stroking drew her near her climax. He sensed the rise, the ache, the helpless tightening deep inside her. Her breath punctuated each thrust as it blew against his neck.

He gripped her hip with his strong hand and held her firmly upon the mattress as he strove to drive her over the edge of rapture.

Sirius was taken to the edge of reason. Where he was mindless and he knew only sensation and overwhelming love.

She clutched his back and his chest heaved. Faster they moved in time.

Unable to restrain herself any longer, a sharp cry escaped Hermione's lips.

Together, they shattered in a melding of flesh and bone. In gasps and groans and sighs of surrender. His body shook as he ground himself against her one final time. A crescendo of exhausting physical expression.

Panting, they relaxed back into the bed. Hermione turned on her side and reached out to wipe the sheen of sweat that had beaded upon Sirius' forehead. She smiled with tears of exaltation in her eyes and brushed a kiss against his lips.

Sirius gathered her to him tightly enjoying the soft warmth of Hermione cuddled against his side. Knowing everything had changed between them.

* * *

Harry could not possibly sit still in his hospital bed for another moment. Try as he might to convince Madam Pomfrey that he was feeling better, she would not permit him to leave until he had taken at least a week's worth of potions. 

"Don't think for one moment that I am not watching you, Harry Potter!" Her scolding voice came from within her office. "I am preparing your next potion so you just sit tight."

Releasing an exasperated sigh, Harry fell back against the pillows. He could not remember ever feeling so restless. After having been unconscious for two days after his collapse, according to Ron, some of his strength seemed to be returning, not much but some.

If Ginny was right about possibly finding answers at Grimmauld Place then Harry was not about to waste any more time lying in the hospital wing like a petulant child. They had devised a plan. It would break a great number of rules but after everything Harry and his friends had done over the years, a few broken rules were scarcely a threat.

Checking the clock on the far wall, Harry saw that it was almost time. And right on cue, Ron and Ginny came bursting into the ward in a panic.

"Madam Pomfrey!" Ginny cried, as she ran the length of the room. "Madam Pomfrey! Neville's been bound by Devil's Snare in the Herbology greenhouses! He's hurt!"

The matronly witch glided out of her office.

"Oh, Longbottom! Why didn't he use his wand? I swear sometimes that boy forgets he is even a wizard!" Her piercing voice scathed.

She grabbed a healing kit and walked briskly from the room, speaking over her shoulder as she went. "Don't you move a muscle, Mister Potter!"

As soon as she disappeared around the corner, Ron and Ginny dropped the panic act and turned to Harry with identical grins.

"That was too easy," Ron mused. "Neville was only too pleased to help anyways. Ready, mate?" He walked over to assist Harry in getting out of bed.

"Is everything ready?" Harry asked his best friend and he rose unsteadily to his feet.

Ron nodded as the three of them slowly made their way towards the door, taking their time as Harry steadied himself on Ron's shoulder.

"Yeah, we packed your things and Ginny shrank it all down. It's in her bag."

"Right. And the invisibility cloak?" The weakened boy posed.

"Here, Harry," Ginny spoke up, holding out the cloak.

Harry smiled gratefully and took it from her, vanishing instantly as he threw it over himself.

"Now, we just have to get beyond the gates of the school so we can portkey back to London," instructed Harry.

Adjusting to a fixed pace, they left the hospital wing. They crossed the grounds cautiously, in the broad daylight Madam Pomfrey could spot them at any moment and they hoped to be gone before she realized Harry was no longer in his bed. Though it took a bit longer than usual, the intimidating gates were looming over them shortly.

Ginny set down her bag and rummaged around inside before withdrawing a dirty old sneaker that would serve as their escape route. She set the illegal portkey on the ground between them.

"Ron created the portkey inside the school walls so there shouldn't be a way for anyone to trace the spell back to him," asserted the pretty redhead.

"_I_ would have done it," Harry challenged. "There is no sense in you getting in trouble."

Ron just shrugged and smiled. "It was nothing, mate. Glad to do it."

Before Harry could retort, Ron confirmed that it was time. They all placed a finger upon the shoe. The tug behind their navels jerked them back as they spun away, landing moments later in a heap upon the doorstep of Grimmauld Place.

Harry waved his wand, silently removing the protective wards around his house. He stepped through the door and though the house remained as dark and lonely as ever, he felt a strange sense of comfort wash over him. He was home.

They walked through the hallway together and descended into the kitchen. Somewhere overhead, Kreacher could be heard scuffling around, no doubt hoarding more Black family heirlooms in his cupboard.

"I'll make some lunch. Sit down and rest for a bit, Harry," Ginny said, rolling up her sleeves and pulling a number of food items taken from the Hogwarts kitchens from her seemingly bottomless bag. Harry leaned his head back and closed his eyes while she set the meal out on the table. The trip, however brief, had taken quite a bit out of him.

A burst of silvery light shot through the window, forcing Harry out of his restful state. A werewolf patronus… Tonks.

"I looked for you three at Hogwarts. Please respond. It is urgent," Spoke her solemn voice from the shimmering beast.

Harry sat up straight, eyeing his friends inquisitively through the dissipating silver vapor. He raised his wand and sent his stag response back through the window.

"I wonder what that was about?" Harry asked aloud.

Ginny's eyes widened in apprehension. "You don't think… it's because of the portkey? Ron, you aren't going to be in trouble are you?" She gasped.

Ron furrowed his brow in concern. He leaned forward on his elbows and said, "I don't know. Could be -"

A rapid pounding on the door cut his words short.

The three exchanged inquisitive glances before Harry pushed away from the table and took the stairs three at a time, hastening to answer the door.

He pulled it open and found Nymphadora Tonks standing on the other side. Her natural black hair hung limp around her shoulders and her eyes were red-rimmed from crying, she looked so small and frail without her typically colorful appearance.

"Tonks! What's happened? Are you alright?!" Harry worriedly bombarded her with questions as he ushered her in the door.

She shook her head and started sobbing into a handkerchief that was crumpled in her hand.

"It's… Remus," She choked out.

"What about him?" Begged Ginny, who, along with Ron, had rushed after Harry into the hallway.

"He… He's – " Tonks tried to force the words out but found her voice failing her.

Harry paled, horrorstricken. "No," He stated, the volume of his voice rising involuntarily with concern. "You don't mean - He isn't -"

"He's dead, Harry," Tonks managed to speak the abhorrent truth before collapsing into sobs once more.

Ginny screamed and buried her face into Ron's shoulder. Her horrible argument with Remus replayed through her mind. She was ashamed that it would be her final memory of her former professor.

Ron felt nauseated. His breathing became ragged as he watched Tonks sink to the floor in despair.

Harry knelt down and wrapped the young woman in his arms, battling tears himself.

"What happened, Tonks?" He whispered to her.

Drawing a deep shaking breath, she murmured into Harry's shoulder.

"He was on an Order mission in Kent and… and something went wrong. The Death Eaters turned an attack and… Remus gave the sign for everyone to apparate back to the safe point but he never made it. Kingsley went back for him but he was… it was… oh God, Harry!"

She doubled over, weeping, supported only by Harry's sturdy frame.

As the four of them mourned in the darkened hallway, the heavy air of sorrow weighed down upon them, stinging like salt in an open wound. From time to time a stifled sob would punctuate the deafening silence.

After a few minutes or possibly hours, no one knew, Ron moved forward and helped the fragile Tonks to her feet, leading her into the small sitting room.

"I'll get some tea," Ginny said somberly, needing an occupation to distract her for the moment.

Harry remained standing, half concealed by the shadows of the corridor, his jaw clenched in adamant determination. He looked on as the only family he had ever known mourned the loss of yet another.

* * *

The winter chill began penetrating the small dormitory as their bodies cooled and Hermione nestled closer to Sirius' warmth. Her head rested on his shoulder and her hand splayed across his chest. 

She knew that there were a million things she ought to say, above all… goodbye, but she could not bring herself to speak. There were no words to express to Sirius what their passionate union had meant to her.

Sirius stroked her cheek with his thumb and kissed her brow.

She tilted her chin, meeting his lips in a soft kiss.

His gray eyes bore into her own of chocolate brown.

"I thought I'd lost you," He spoke softly to her.

Hermione flinched almost imperceptibly. She had to tell him. James was right; she couldn't leave without saying goodbye. But more than that, she would tell him the truth… all of it.

"Sirius, I have to tell you something."

"I have to tell you something too," He responded, brushing her hair off her face tenderly. "You first."

She began to launch into her explanation, "This is… going to sound very strange but I need you to know –"

They both bolted upright as an earsplitting explosion shook the very walls of the school, interrupting their conversation.

"What was that?!" Hermione gasped in alarm.

Sirius pulled his boxers on and ran to the window. He craned his neck to see the source of the blast and found a large crowd of students gathered around the massive front doors of the castle. Adrenaline ripped through his body when, just discernible through the crowd in the center of the circle, he saw his friends, James, Remus and Peter, wands aloft and completely surrounded by Slytherins.

"Bloody Slytherin gits," He cursed through clenched teeth.

He turned to Hermione who had run up to peer out the window as well. Her eyes were wide with fear. She knew exactly what he was thinking.

"Don't go, Sirius," She begged in a whisper.

He observed her intensely through his dark gray eyes. They both knew he would go. But for the first time in his life, he wished he didn't have to. For the first time in his life, Sirius Black did not want to rush into the heart of a battle seeking excitement and danger. Sirius Black wanted to stay behind. Because for the first time, he had something to live for.

He quickly began collecting his scattered articles of clothing, dressing feverishly. Hermione, too, dressed and grabbed both their wands.

Sirius took his offered wand and gave her a searing gaze.

"Stay here, Hermione."

"I'm coming with you," She said earnestly.

There was no time to argue, shouts from the grounds below were growing louder and more insistent.

Sirius kissed her soundly on the mouth, allowing his lips to linger for only a few seconds before grabbing her hand as they raced out of the room.

* * *

Harry hovered in the entrance of the Grimmauld Place library. With a wave of his wand, he lit the sconces on the walls. The grimy windows did not allow the daylight to penetrate the room. 

Leaning in the doorway, he surveyed the illuminated room. It had remained exactly as it had been when he, Ron and Hermione were using it to research possible horcruxes. A heavy layer of dust created a sheer gray tinge on every surface. Filthy as the house was it was difficult to believe that Grimmauld Place had a resident house elf at all.

Harry scanned the room in front of him for anything they might have missed, some clue Hermione may have left behind. But nothing seemed out of the ordinary. There were books scattered about, but it was a library so that was hardly unusual.

He released a weighty sigh. He had spent the past two hours in the emergency Order meeting listening to four different accounts of the events surrounding Remus' death, watching while Tonks listened stoically, her eyes having taken on a haunting vacancy.

As far as Harry was concerned, replaying Remus' final moments again and again served no purpose. He had excused himself from the meeting hastily and sought refuge away from the pain. The house had become incredibly stifling since Tonks had arrived earlier that day… Tragedy hung heavily in the air and was bearing down on them all.

He had come upstairs to force himself to think of something other than death, to try and forget that Remus' death was entirely his own fault. If he had tried harder to find the horcruxes… or been strong enough to defeat Voldemort sooner… then Remus would still be alive.

No one in the meeting downstairs could possibly understand that. Everyone would only attempt to convince him that he could not blame himself. But there was nothing he could do now. Remus was dead.

Harry knew that he could never run far enough to escape the pain that closed in all around threatening to suffocate him. Everything and everyone was being taken from him… his parents, Sirius, Dumbledore, and now, Remus. Even Hermione had been stolen away.

It would never end. Until Harry found a way to conquer the darkest wizard of all time, he would continue to suffer the losses of those he loved. Who would be next? Mrs. Weasley? Ron? Ginny?

It didn't bear thinking about… but he couldn't think about anything else.

He crossed the room and sat heavily, sinking into the dusty, moth eaten couch. A renegade tear escaped his eye and trailed down his cheek against his will.

The knowledge that he would, in the end, lose everything that mattered to him ate away at his insides and he succumbed to the despair.

He leaned forward with his head in his hands, more tears following the first, racing down his face and through his fingers. Fleetingly, he entertained the thought of getting a time turner; some way to warn Remus, at least to spare Tonks this grief.

But he knew that was futile.

And then he thought of Hermione, the one person who did have the power to change all of this. She had a golden opportunity to repair all the damage that he had done. Though gauging from his own health, she seemed to be doing more harm than good.

He stood and began collecting some of the scattered books around the room and placed them back on the shelves, unable to sit still. An ancient looking tome with a worn, black leather cover printed with gilded runes lay open on the floor and he bent to pick it up when a thought occurred to him.

Hermione could be undoing his birth… but, as certain comprehension flooded over him, he realized, it would be for the best. Everyone he had lost had died because of him. They had given their lives for him. If he were never born, none of the terrible tragedies would ever come to pass.

His parents would never have died to save him.

Sirius would not have left the safety of Grimmauld place to rescue him at the Ministry where he would fall beyond the veil.

Dumbledore would not have been killed trying to protect him.

They were entirely his fault. None of them would have died if he had never been born.

Harry fell to his knees on the floor, the large book still clutched in his arms and he cried.

* * *

The Entrance Hall was crammed with nosy students shoving their way through the doors, eager to witness the fight between the three Marauders and what appeared to be nearly every student in Slytherin. 

Sirius pulled Hermione through the crowd, fighting his way through roughly. When they neared the center of the group, Sirius turned to Hermione and said firmly, "Wait here."

A useless statement. She would never stand and watch as those she cared about were in danger.

With a final squeeze of her hand, he charged into the fray where his friends were feverishly casting spellsin every direction. Sirius did not hesitate for a second before he began firing off spell after spell at the offending Slytherins. The younger members of the Slytherin house were taken care of quickly and many simply began to run away from the fight when they saw the Gryffindors' strength and skill.

Sirius took fleeting looks in every direction to assess the location of his friends noticing that a number of his own housemates were joining in to support their own.

James was nearest the castle doors, engaged in an intenseduel with Damien McNair. They were each shouting and deflecting spells so quickly that all that could be heard was a cacophony of magical terminology. All the while James bore a haughty smirk, enjoying the skirmish. A Marauder through and through.

A cry of pain from behind Sirius sent him whirling around where he saw Peter falling back into the horde of bystanders, clutching his elbow, blood running through his fingers and Bellatrix Black standing over him cackling.

Sirius lunged forward to curse her himself when, instead, Frank Longbottom jumped out of the crowd, aimed his wand at Bellatrix and shouted "Stupefy!" The spell whizzed past her, sending a ripple through her black robes.

She turned around snarling and smiled menacingly when she saw her attacker. She launched herself at him and the two began waging a new battle.

"Wormtail? Are you alright?" Sirius called over the clamor.

The smaller boy pulled himself to his feet aided by Sirius' outstretched hand. He wiped his bloodied hand on his pants and nodded vigorously. "I'm fine!" He piped up.

Sirius nodded at his friend once reassured he was not severely hurt and immediately caught sight of Rodolphus Lestrange who had cornered Alice between three of his mates and was egging her on to hex him. Sirius threw a curse, aimed at his chest. The spell just grazed its precise target and the neckline of Lestrange's robe slit open.

Sirius opened his mouth to cast another spell, one that wouldn't only tear Lestrange's robes, whena blaze of red sparks flew pasthis head, barely missing his ear. He spun around, without even a first glance, shouting, "Expelliarmus!"

The well placed curse sent a wand flying high in the air and he caught it neatly. He looked up to stare his would-be attacker in the eye and came face-to-face with his own brother, Regulus, whose visage was a mask of trepidation.

"I'm s-sorry, Sirius," He stuttered, looking around to see if any of his housemates had seen him disarmed by his own brother.

"I will disregard the fact that you just tried to curse me, Regulus," Sirius growled, approaching his younger brother dangerously. "Take your wand and get the hell out of here."

"I - I can't,"Cowered the younger Black.

"Don't make me hex you. Go to your common room. NOW!"

Regulus peered around again, making sure that none had witnessed the scene. He snatched his wand from Sirius' open hand and backed away slowly before bolting into the surging mob of onlookers.

Sirius dove back into the fight, confident that his misled arse of a younger brother would at least be spared from his own stupidityfor the moment.

The shouts of spells and curses rang in his ears and the roar of the crowd's gasps and screams were disorientating. He could hear teachers shouting to be let through the group but no one turned away from the escalating battle.

A Stinging Hex stabbed Hermione's abdomen and she nearly doubled over in pain. Compelling herself to stand tall in light of the pain, a shadow fell over her and she looked up into the face of a much taller though younger Slytherin girl, Alecto Carrow. Her stringy, limp black hair hung about her rounded face and she grimaced, showing her yellowed teeth.

"Levicorpus!" Alecto spat. Hermione instantaneously flew upwards by her ankle.

"Liberacorpus!" Hermione muttered the counter-spell dizzily, as she plunged back to the ground.

Alecto chuckled when Hermione flinched as she pulled herself to her feet, clutching the arm on which she'd landed. As the burly Slytherin girl gloated, Hermione cast a retaliatory non-verbal spell. A small fire flared up at Alecto's feet. She shrieked as her robes began to smoke, the triumphant smile melted from her face as she jumped up and down in an attempt to extinguish the flames. Hermione utilized her distraction to hurl a leg-locking jinx at the girl. Alecto's legs bound beneath her and she lost her balance, tumbling to the ground in a useless heap.

It was Hermione's turn to sneer. She quenched the fire with water from her wand as Alecto swore at her from the ground. Though Hermione wasted no time with false triumph, there was still a senseless fight to finish.

* * *

**"_Please, Hermione," Harry begged aloud to the empty library as he knelt weakly on the floor. __"Please, f__ix it. You have to fix it. I don't care what happens to me. But you have to find a way to save them. Give them the lives they all deserved. Save their futures."_**

**_He dropped the __ancient __book he'd been holding and it fell open on the floor beside him._**

* * *

Hermione set eyes on Frank Longbottom, gasping for air as he dueled Bellatrix at an exhausting pace. The Slytherin may have surpassed Frank in ability but she had underestimated the power of his courage. The man would not back down. Hermione ran after them to assist Neville's father. Together, the two Gryffindors rounded on Bellatrix Black. 

Sirius glimpsed Remus and sprinted towards him. The werewolf was fighting both Grayson Goyle and Evan Rosier at once, his lycanthropy lending him speed and dexterity in his combat maneuvers.

"Petrificus Totalus!" Remus caught Goyle dead on and the husky boy stiffened as though made of marble and fell to the ground, the sound of his body hitting the stone pathway was muffled by the resounding noise all around them.

Red sparks flew at the two Marauders from Rosier's wand.

"Protego!" Remus and Sirius shouted in unison.

The Slytherins were no match for them in skill. But they were vastly outnumbered, even as more Gryffindors enlisted in battle.

"Are you alright, Moony?" Sirius asked, as they stood back to back, deflecting curses once more.

"Fine," Remus confirmed. "Took a hit to the shoulder but I'll live." Remus made a passing gesture to his wound.

Sirius took notice of the torn robes and blood running down Remus' arm and was overcome with the desire to fulfill a deadly vendetta against his friends' attackers.

Suddenly, Professor McGonagall burst into the group, appearing as though from thin air, holding her wand out in front of her.

"Stop this at once!" She screamed in her shrill voice. "Stop, all of you!"

But they did not stop. They did not even hesitate. Some did not even hear the voice of the strict Transfiguration professor. The bad blood between the houses ran fartoo deeply to stopnow. Only the Gryffindors were momentarily distracted by the appearance of their head of house.

McNair and Lestrange acknowledged the Gryffindors' fleeting distraction. They took the opportunity and bolted into the swarm of students and through the open doors of the school followed by Bellatrix, Rosier, and the rest of their malevolent housemates that hadn't yet been bested.

The Marauders, Frank, Alice, Hermione and most of Gryffindor house, sprinted after them into the Great Hall.

"Don't you dare run!" Sirius bellowed at them, breathing heavily from exhaustion. They pursued their adversaries to the far end of the Hall. Students flooded in all around the tables, many were horror-struck spectators but some were brave enough to step into the conflict themselves.

McNair spun around from behind the staff table and screamed, "SECTUMSEMPRA!"

James ducked in time to avoid being hit square in the chest but he wasn't fast enough to avoid it entirely. The spell brushed his forehead splitting a gash above his right eyebrow that began bleeding down his face.

Lily, who had returned from Hogsmeade only seconds earlier and followed the crowd into the Hall, witnessed the attack and emitted a horrified scream.

"James, No!"Tears ran down her face as blood streamed down his.

He turned to look at her and saw her terrified expression as she ran into the midst of danger without a second thought, desperately needing to reach him.

"Lily, get out of here! You're going to get hurt!"

She looked up to meet his bloodied gaze, her green eyes burning with fiery intensity, the tears dissolving with her tenacity. "I am not leaving your side, James Potter."

James swelled with pride as he looked down at the beautiful woman who was willing to risk her own safety for him. For a moment the bangs issuing all around them disappeared and he realized at once that right there, with Lily… it felt right.

The communication between the two was clear. Awakening to their surroundings, they turned back to the scene around them and began fighting side-by-side as their rivals closed in on every side.

A large group of faculty members could barely be heard shoving their way through the Entrance Hall. Damien McNair eyed them menacingly over the heads of the masses and raised his wand slowly. With a deadly glare in their direction he slashed his wand downward and shouted, "Expulso!"

The walls of the castle shook again as before and the doorway leading into the Great Hall began to collapse, rumbling the stone floors beneath their feet. Students ran screaming in every direction, some made it into the Hall before the stones came crashing down and some escaped the other way. But those who remained inside were now trapped.

* * *

**_"I don't know what to do. I'm scared, Hermione."_**

* * *

Lily's instincts as Head Girl had immediately called to her to ensure that no one had been trapped beneath the rubble but before she could get to the doors, Amycus Carrow, Alecto's brother and an exceptionally cruel future Death-Eater, leapt in front of her. 

"I don't think so, mudblood," He sneered so close to her that his hot, murky breath dusted across her face. "You aren't going anywhere."

The bold girl poised herself to strike. "STUPEF- "

"Serpensortia!" Carrow cut her off.

Instantly, an enormous emerald green snake burst from the tip of his wand and landed heavily on the floor. The serpent set off directly towards Lily, slithering nimbly around the feet of the dozens of fighting students.

Lily backed away from the snake hurriedly, until she smacked into the stone wall. She was blocked in. The snake approached all the more quickly.

"Impedimenta!" She screamed, pointing her wand at the awful reptile in an attempt to slow its progress. The spell hit the snake but ricocheted off its slimy green skin and had no impact on its speed. It glided more quickly until it reached her feet and slowly began wrapping its body around her legs, binding them together.

Across the room, a Slytherin underclassman by the name of Avery crumbled to the floor, stupefied. James having cast the hex on Avery, turned away from his victim sharply, instinctively hearing Lily's shrieks despite the raucous commotion.

His eyes scanned the chaos though his vision was blurred from the blood that still ran from the cut on his brow. Then he saw her, in a corner, back to the wall and spouting off spell after spell to no avail. At once his feet set into motion, deftly curving around one of the long tables.

The snake came into view and James wielded his wand with a swish and flick, reciting, "Wingardium Leviosa!" Another flick of his wand and the snake sailed, spiraling through the air, latching itself around the neck of Amycus Carrow who dropped his own wand as he struggled to fight off the serpent that tightened itself around his throat.

Rodolphus Lestrange called out a spell to release the snake, vanishing it entirely. Carrow drew an exaggerated breath as his airflow was restored. Rodolphus then trained his beady eyes on James.

Bearing down on him, treading ferociously, hate seeping from every pore, Lestrange, whispered forebodingly, "Crucio."

James cried out and crumpled to the floor, his face twisted in excruciating pain.

"STOP!! Leave him alone!" Lily screamed, shoving Lestrange forcefully to no avail. She crouched down beside James' writhing body. "Protego! Protego!!"

But her spells could not shield him against an Unforgiveable Curse.

James' tormented screams carried over the room and pierced the eardrums of his best friend. Sirius halted amid his own battle with McNair upon hearing the sound and turned to see his best friend, his brother, convulsing in pain on the floor.

Forgetting that there were a hundred bystanders to witness all that happened, only aware that he had to get to his friend, Sirius instinctively transformed into his animagus form and hurdled over the Gryffindor table.

The large black dog rocketed through the air, directly towards Lestrange. Sirius charged into his chest. Rodolphus was lifted off his feet and they both slammed into the wall, sliding down to the floor. A dull crunch denoted Lestrange's ribs had broken on contact. His wand soared out of his hand and snapped in two as it vaulted off of the solid earth.

The predatory animagus transformed back into the equally seething Sirius Black. Having sustained a bloody lip in his assault, Sirius gathered the neck of Lestrange's robes and forced him to his feet and held him firmly against the wall by the throat. He swung his other arm back, balled his hand into a tight fist and thrust it forward, colliding into the Slytherin's temple with a brutal crack. Rodolphus' head snapped back from the powerful hit, a purple-ish hue surfacing

Sirius brought his face deathly close to Lestrange's as his entire body shook with rage. "Don't you ever, EVER even think about uttering an Unforgiveable at one of us again. If you do, Merlin help you, I will gladly spend my remaining days in Azkaban if it means that you die a painful death."

The blind hatred in Sirius' eyes chilled Lestrange to the bone. Sirius shoved him back into the wall and he slid to floor in pain, clutching his broken ribs.

"Prongs!" Sirius ran over to James who was leaning unsteadily against a table supported by Lily.

James held up his hand as Sirius approached. "I'm alright, Padfoot. I'll be alright."

Sirius released a breath he had been holding for heaven only knows how long. James rested his extended hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Thanks, mate," He said, though he winced as a jolt of resonant pain shot through him.

Sirius never had the chance to respond. A massive stone block came crashing down from overhead, smashing into the table before them. They covered their eyes as splintered wood was thrown high into the air then rained down over them.

* * *

**_"Save them. My parents, Sirius, Remus… they were robbed of their lives. They deserved them... More than I ever have."_**

* * *

Damien McNair threw his head back in vengeful mirth. 

Sirius turned to McNair and bared his teeth furiously. "You mean to kill us all, McNair?!" He bellowed audaciously.

"Only if I can," The lanky Slytherin shot back with a snarl.

Sirius strode towards him purposefully. "You're going to regret that."

McNair raised a single eyebrow arrogantly and smiled widely, "On the contrary. You will be the one with the regrets, Black."

"I will never regret what I am about to do to you," Sirius cautioned as he pulled out his wand at lighting speed.

"Tsk, tsk," McNair goaded him. "Not so fast, Black. Look around. You're surrounded."

Sirius swiveled his head to the right and left. Damien was right. He was, in fact, surrounded by Slytherins.

"Come on, Cousin," Sassed Bellatrix from his left side. "You thought you could take us all by yourself. Let me see you try."

Sirius smiled to himself sardonically. He was known for his recklessness, for his disregard of the rules and for causing trouble. But even he could recognize danger when he saw it.

Turning in a slow circle, he saw James, despite the great physical pain it caused him, trying to make his way over to Sirius while Lily attempted to keep him out of the fight. Duels were in full swing all around the hall, students that had been injured in the crossfire were being helped out of the way by their fellow bystanders. But the brave among them refused to concede.

Peter, his wand arm having been injured by Bellatrix, fought a short, stocky Slytherin prefect awkwardly with the other hand. Remus and Nadine were sparring with a daunting blond seventh year Slytherin male who towered over them both. Hermione dodged a curse from Amycus Carrow and a suit of armor directly behind her exploded.

* * *

**_"Help me, Hermione. Help me save them."_**

* * *

Sirius willed Hermione to look at him, wishing that she had stayed behind in her dormitory. He took a split second to verify that she seemed unhurt. The paradox between the scene unfolding around them and the passionate bliss they had experienced only hours before was astounding. 

"Your move," chided Bellatrix.

Shaking the image of Hermione from his mind, Sirius focused on the four dark wizards that encompassed him.

Drawing a long deep breath, Sirius began barking curses relentlessly in every direction as he ducked and jumped the retaliatory spells sent back at him from every side.

A spell soared past his shoulder, blasting a dent into the stone floor that it impacted. The debris flew back at Sirius who waved his wand and sent the rock shards into McNair's face. On and on they fought, four on one, his quick reflexes aiding him at every turn.

"Starting the party without us, Padfoot?" James called as he, Remus and Peter suddenly appeared on the edge of the outnumbered fight. Weary though he looked, James smiled and half grimaced from his lingering pain, the after effects of the Cruciatus Curse.

The Slytherins that had been focused solely on Sirius did not waste a second before launching into battle with the newly arrived Marauders.

Except for Bellatrix. She sauntered towards Sirius at a dangerously slow rate. Her wand directed at his heart.

"I'm not afraid of you, Bella," Sirius stormed, planted firmly in one place as she approached. He was not afraid of her for one second. Not for himself, at least. What did frighten him was that Bellatrix would not hesitate to harm anyone close to him in a demonstration of psychological torture.

He silently gave thanks that his cousin did not know of his feelings for Hermione Granger. It would only serve to endanger the bright, young witch. As he thought of her, his eyes involuntarily sought her out. His gaze settled on her once spotted and he felt a sense of pride mingled with fear when he found that she still fought on tirelessly.

Bellatrix trailed his line of sight and her eyes too came to rest on the mysterious Gryffindor girl. The look in her cousin's eyes was unmistakable. He was in love.

The dark witch's face contorted into a wicked smile.

"Pretty little thing, isn't she?" Bellatrix dared, her words dripping with malice.

Sirius snapped his face back towards his cousin and his eyes widened as realization dawned upon him. She knew.

"Don't worry, cousin," Her murderous smile broadened as she whispered. Her eyes alight with madness. "Your secret is safe with me."

Moving towards her for the first time, Sirius commanded, "If you so much as look at her, I'll –"

"What?" She ridiculed. "Hex me? Kill me? What are you going to do to me?"

Sirius' eyes flicked from Bellatrix to Hermione and back.

"Stupefy!" He shot at her. The spell was quickly blocked though and she sent another back instantly.

He lunged to the left as the blue sparks dashed past him. They mirrored one another in stance, circling tentatively.

"Expelliarmus!"

This time Bellatrix did not manage to halt the spell before it hit her precisely on the hand clutching her wand.

It was pulled from her fist by the invisible force and skidded across the floor and under a table. She tore after her magical device, throwing herself under the table. While she fumbled around frantically for her wand, Sirius sprang across the room.

"Hermione!" He called eagerly. Hermione had petrified a Slytherin teen only seconds earlier and she stood back exhaustedly. But she did not hear him. The blasts and shouts combined with the roar of the surplus masses were too loud.

"HERMIONE!!"

She heard his voice calling her and looked up.

Their eyes met and a relief flooded his entire being. He moved swiftly toward her, every inch of him itching to hold her.

When he was ten yards away from gathering her in his arms, his pathway was obstructed by Damien McNair. Hermione rushed forward but was blocked by Bellatrix who gripped her firmly by the arms.

The broad young man stood firmly in front of Sirius. "Not so fast, Black," He cautioned. "I have something for you."

"What's that, McNair?" Sirius spat. Never tearing his eyes away from Hermione's.

"This!" Damien held his wand high above his head and brought it downward in a violent slash.

Sirius' face went blank as he was blasted backwards into the air. He hovered in space for an ephemeral instant, his lifeless body set against the bewitched ceiling of the Great Hall reflecting a cerulean sky.

Then he came crashing down, colliding with the ground.

* * *

_**"****It's up to you now, Hermione. You are the only one that can change it."**_

* * *

Hermione's blood ran cold as she watched Sirius' limp body fall from mid-air. She released a spine-chilling scream. 

Everything around her stopped. Wands were lowered. No one spoke. Every eye was trained on the figure of Sirius Black plummeting to the earth. The crash echoed throughout the Hall that was otherwise as silent as the grave.

The crowd surged forward and swarmed around where he lay.

* * *

**_"I need you."_**

* * *

Hermione charged towards him but the faster she ran the farther away she seemed to get. The room felt as though it was lengthening… stretching. 

She felt dizzy but she pushed on. Compelled to get to him.

She shouted but no sound came out.

The crowd of students extended farther and farther beyond her reach.

Something was pulling her backwards. She fought against it, running harder but her feet were no longer hitting the floor.

Everything became a hazy blur of color and motion.

The ground fell away from beneath her.

She was flying back in the opposite direction at an increasing rate.

"SIRIUS!!" She tried to call to him, but her voice was silent.

* * *

**_"I need you, Hermione."_**

**_The pages of the tattered book fluttered in a non-existent breeze as the final words left Harry's mouth._**

* * *

The Great Hall was miles away now. 

She was whirling.

She was falling.

And everything went black.

* * *

**Please Review! I would love to hear your thoughts. **


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: I know this is a short chapter... but don't hate me. It was necessary. **

**Chapter Seventeen.**

* * *

There was velvety darkness all around.

Floating or falling…

Asleep or awake…

Hermione sank further and further into oblivion.

Through the sea of shadows flashes of light beamed sporadically.

**A flash of blue light.**

Sirius' face.

**A flash of blue light and scenes began to play before her as though projected onto the vast expanse of nothingness. **

_Sirius plummeting to the floor of the Great Hall. Screams and sobs from the crowd sounding all around. _

**A flash of blue light.**

_It is daylight. Beneath a beautiful floral archway, James beams as Lily walks up the aisle towards him in an ivory satin gown. Beside him, Sirius, Remus and Peter smile broadly as their best friend marries the love of his life._

**Flash.**

_James is handing a newborn Harry, wrapped in a red blanket, to Sirius who cannot hold back tears of joy. Remus claps James on the shoulder in congratulations. Peter gazes intently at the infant, his brow furrowed in uncertainty, before excusing himself and departing._

**Flash.**

_Four Marauders and Lily, clutching the infant Harry to her chest, huddle together in a living room, listening, horrified as Dumbledore relates to them a prophecy he has heard. The Potter's child may be in grave danger. Sirius embraces James and swears that he will die to protect his Godchild. _

**Flash.**

_James and Lily make Peter their Secret-Keeper. Lily kisses him on the cheek and expresses her endless gratitude to him for protecting their family. _

**Flash.**

_With a trembling hand, Peter hastily scratches a message to Albus Dumbledore. The word "tonight" is shakily underlined twice before the parchment is sent off hastily via owl._

**Flash.**

_The front door of James and Lily's home is blasted open. The dark wizard strides in, wand raised. James shouts to Lily and she runs up the stairs. Dumbledore, Sirius, Remus, Nadine and five other Order members apparate into the room instantly. Clearly stunned at finding the couple guarded, Voldemort begins sending curses hurriedly. A jet of green light hits Nadine in the chest. Remus catches her as she falls in death. _

_Voldemort ascends the stairs deftly. Lily cries out and stands firmly between Harry and Voldemort. Just as the second burst of green light jets from the end of his wand, Peter charges in the room and shoves Lily out of the way. He shields the baby's body with his own as the Unforgiveable Curse strikes his back. Peter's body falls stiffly to the ground. _

_Lily screams and struggles to get to her feet. Voldemort ignores Lily, trains his wand on Harry and repeats the Killing Curse. A great blast resounds and as the smoke clears, James rushes into the room to find Lily clutching Harry to her._

**Flash.**

_Hermione is eleven. She stands on Platform 9 ¾ with her parents waiting to board the Hogwarts Express for the first time. She happens into a compartment in which two boys are seated. One has dirt on his nose. The other, his best friend since infancy, is the famous Harry Potter with the legendary lightning bolt scar upon his forehead. _

**Flash.**

_Hermione, Harry and Ron are arriving at King's Cross at the end of their first year fresh from their adventure with the Sorcerer's Stone. Harry runs to greet his parents. His father sweeps him up in his arms and hugs him lovingly. He introduces his new friend, Hermione, to his parents. James and Lily meet Hermione enthusiastically and exchange a significant look over her head. _

**Flash.**

_The three friends are on the train once more, on the way to begin their second year. New Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor, Remus Lupin, joins them to greet his best friend's son, Harry, and Ron. He sees Hermione and observes her with astonishment before he smiles softly then departs the cabin._

**Flash.**

_Harry has just completed the first task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament by summoning his Firebolt. Hermione and Ron celebrate with him. Harry's parents rush to their son. James beams with pride while Lily fusses over Harry worriedly. Sirius approaches and wraps his Godson in a fierce embrace. Harry introduces Hermione to his Godfather, an Auror, who stares at her for a long time before shaking her hand slowly. He tells her that he has heard from both Harry and Remus that she is the "smartest witch of her age". She blushes._

**Flash.**

_Harry emerges from the maze, covered in blood, gripping the Tri-Wizard Cup and Cedric Diggory's body. James is the first to his side as Harry reveals that Voldemort has returned._

**Flash.**

_It is Christmas at Grimmauld Place. A fifteen year old Hermione is dashing __down to the kitchen when she runs into Sirius on the staircase. He reaches out a hand to steady her and smiles. Her back presses against the wall. His eyes flick upward towards a cluster of mistletoe hanging overhead. He leans in closer with a hand resting on her shoulder, his eyes fixed on her own. _

_His lips stop short of brushing hers when he pauses and pulls away, kissing her cheek instead. He stands and gazes at her for a moment. Her name is called from the kitchen. She flushes and continues down the staircase. He stands alone on the landing for a long time after she leaves. _

**Flash.**

_Members of Dumbledore's Army fight alongside the Order of the Phoenix at the Ministry of Magic. Sirius ducks a jet of red light sent by Bellatrix. She raises an eyebrow and smirks as she aims her wand at Hermione who stands opposite Sirius. Before Bellatrix can utter a word, Sirius hits her with a curse and she falls backward through the veiled archway. _

**Flash.**

_Dumbledore and Harry return to the school to find the Dark Mark gleaming over the castle. Death Eaters have invaded Hogwarts. The Headmaster and sixteen year old Harry run into the school to find students, Order members and Aurors battling once again. James shouts for Harry to get out but he refuses to leave. Sirius duels tirelessly, never leaving Hermione's side._

**Flash.**

_Hermione is in the library of Grimmauld Place. She pulls a heavy leather bound book from the shelf. Opening the first page, she runs her fingers over the unrecognizable runes when she disappears._

The flashes stopped.

There was darkness.

Then there was nothing.

* * *

"Hermione?" A voice was speaking to her from far away.

She fought against the pitch blackness.

"She's waking up!" The voice called.

Hermione's eyes opened slowly and she winced against the blinding white light. She could make out a blurry figure above her. Unruly dark hair… glasses…

"J- James…" Hermione muttered, before falling unconscious.

* * *

**Review… Pretty Please ******


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**Chapter Eighteen.**

* * *

_"Hermione?" A voice was speaking to her from far away. _

_She fought against the pitch blackness._

_"She's waking up!" The voice called._

_Hermione's eyes opened slowly and she winced against the blinding white light. She could make out a blurry figure above her. Unruly dark hair… glasses…_

_"J- James…" Hermione muttered, before falling unconscious._

* * *

Hermione awoke to the sounds of voices all around her. Though some sounded familiar, she couldn't immediately identify any of them as they all spoke at once, hushed yet urgent.

She tried to silence them but they murmured on and on causing her temples to throb.

Drawing in a long, deep breath, she gasped as a sharp pain stabbed her chest and her eyes flew open. The involuntary reaction was immediately regretted as she was instantly blinded by bright lights that seemed to radiate down on her and she groaned aloud.

"Call the healer! She's in pain… something's wrong!" There was that voice again, a man's voice. She tried to make out where she had heard it but her head pounded the more she attempted to concentrate.

"Hermione?" A woman's voice floated down to her ears. Ever so soothingly, the woman asked, "Can you open your eyes again?"

Hermione furrowed her brow and slowly pried her eyelids open again as the voice spoke softly to her. This time she was prepared for the glaring lights and blinked hastily as her eyes slowly adjusted.

Shifting painfully, she gathered she was in a hospital bed; the sterile smell unique only to medical settings was obvious to her senses.

Shadowy figures swarmed about the bright room, their voices still whispering frantically to one another.

Beside her bed was the hazy outline of a female, a halo of light reflecting from her brilliant red hair. Then, the blurry visage that had spoken to her before appeared over her again. She squinted her eyes and tried to bring the face into focus though all she could seem to distinguish was a pair of dark framed glasses… and messy black hair…

'Could it be?' She asked herself in confused astonishment. The bleary outline slowly began to take form and Hermione's dry lips could not help but crack a weak smile.

"James?" She gasped at the familiar face, her throat raw and mouth dry. "J-James. The... the fight. What, how... what happened?" He opened his mouth to speak but paused. Her eyes scanned his face for an answer, the only answer she needed. "Sir... Sirius. Where is he?... Is he alright? I want-"

"Hermione? It's me, Harry."

"H – Harry?" Her brow creased in confusion. She tried to recall what had happened before she had blacked out… The last thing she remembered was being in the Great Hall. The Gryffindors were fighting the Slytherins. Sirius had been… he'd been hurt. "But… but how- ?"

"You're back, Hermione," Spoke a deeper voice, as a taller man approached her from behind Harry.

James.

Only then did she notice the deliberate differences between the two. Harry's brilliant green eyes… His mother's eyes. His slightly smaller nose, his telltale scar…

It was true then. She had come back to her own time..

"No…" Hermione murmured though she knew it could not change anything. Her chocolate brown eyes welled with tears. "I can't be… I was just there… I –"

"Try to calm down, dear," The red-headed woman coaxed. The woman Hermione now recognized as Lily, perched on the edge of the bed and stroked Hermione's forehead in an attempt to soothe her, just as she had done that day by the Great Lake. That was years ago for Lily but only weeks in Hermione's mind.

Hermione fought against her weakly. She wanted to wake up and find herself safely in Sirius' arms in her bed…where he had last held her. Pushing against Lily was futile, Hermione had no strength and her body would not obey her commands. She felt her consciousness slipping away again.

"No…" She repeated in a barely audible breath. "Where is - "

The door to the room swung open and an older woman with gray hair pulled back into a taut bun strode in briskly halting with a start as she discovered the large group of worried visitors crowding the tiny space.

Narrowing her eyes she shook her head discouragingly. She spotted Lily seated beside the patient and raised an eyebrow.

"Healer Potter, I am aware that you are not on duty but I must insist that hospital rules still be heeded. I count six people in this room. Six! Three is the maximum, as you well know!" Her severe tone grew increasingly shrill as she became more and more agitated.

Lily, however, seemed used to this Healer's behavior and listened with a polite smile until she found a moment to interject politely, yet purposefully.

"Yes, I am aware of the hospital rules, Healer Calhoun," She said gently. "But it seems that this young lady had a number of friends concerned for her wellbeing."

The supervising Healer glanced around the room again and sighed. Lily Potter was so highly regarded at St. Mungo's that not only was it extremely difficult to be upset with her but it was impossible not to become a fast friend and, despite her strict disposition, Judith Calhoun liked Lily very much.

"How long has she been awake?" Healer Calhoun asked, choosing to ignore the surplus bodies surrounding her.

Lily rose from the bed and took Hermione's hand as she answered. "Only a few moments. She is still fairly disoriented."

The Healer approached the bed, referencing her clip board and jotting a few brief observations.

Hermione listened to this exchange but closed her eyes once more. They had grown fatigued so quickly. It seemed that she hadn't used them in ages.

She felt dizzy as though the darkness was orbiting around her or she around it. The fight in the Great Hall still seemed so fresh in her mind and, yet, here she was decades later surrounded by those she thought she had left behind and those who had become a part of her new life in the past.

It was surreal and terrifying, seeing that Lily and James had aged nineteen years while she, as was evident from her own body, was still just seventeen years old.

But most importantly, where was Sirius?

She wanted to open her eyes and see _him_ seated at her side, to feel _him_ stroking her forehead... his wry smile and sparkling grey eyes…

"Very well. I'm afraid I must ask you all to leave while I examine Miss Granger," ordered the elder witch sternly.

Lily gave Hermione's hand a squeeze. "I think we have some messages to send. There are quite a few people who will want to hear the good news that you're awake," She said with a warm smile.

"Lily, please! Tell me… where is he?" Hermione whispered hoarsely as she gripped Lily's hand with what little strength she had. "Where is Sirius?"

"Young lady," The healer said firmly. "You will be able to speak to your visitors later. At the moment, I must insist that I do my job which means, everybody out!"

Hermione silently pleaded with Lily as the elegant redhead withdrew her hand from the weakening grip.

Lily looked back at her, her face lined with regret and hesitation. She paused to respond to the confused young woman but allowed herself to be pulled away when James placed his hand on her back.

Hermione turned her face towards the window, away from the group of what felt like strangers that were filing out of her room. She knew she ought to be happy that these people cared for her but the lump in her throat from restrained sobs was too thick to ignore and she could not hide the tears that had begun streaming down her face. She could not feel happiness nor could she feign happiness. Not without him.

"We'll be right outside the door if you need us," Assured Harry as his dad led him too out of the room.

Ron and Ginny rose from chairs near the window. "Mum will be thrilled you're awake, Hermione," Ron said with an encouraging tone to his voice.

"Let's go, everyone," urged James.

Hermione heard the door swing shut sending a chilly breeze through the room that now felt as empty as it sounded.

Healer Calhoun cleared her throat but Hermione remained turned away, eyes firmly shut to the strange surroundings.

"Sir? I said everyone out, that includes you," the healer insisted, though she now spoke softly, surrendering the icy edge her voice had held only minutes earlier.

A very low, discouraged growl followed by reluctant footsteps. The heavy reverberations made their way to Hermione's ears and she turned her head so quickly that her stiff neck sent pain shooting up and down her body. Her eyes sought the source of those footsteps and that nearly silent growl that had been so reminiscent of the only person whose presence she longed for and the only face she wanted to see at that moment.

But there was no one there; just the Healer, a closed door and a silent room.

Several achingly silent moments passed as the healer checked the young woman's vitals. Touching various points on her arms, forehead and chest with her wand; Healer Calhoun made notations on Hermione's chart.

The unsettling quiet was broken when a woman, laden with a meal tray and an armful of files, bustled noisily into the room, pushing the door open with her backside.

"Sorry, I'm late, Judy," The woman apologized, though her rich Cockney accent was cheerful and bright.

"It's Judith, as I've reminded you, and I prefer you call me Healer Calhoun while on duty," sniffed the superior witch. She turned to Hermione and sighed with a forcibly controlled breath. "Miss Granger, this is Healer Bliss. She'll be arranging your meals and ensuring your comfort while you remain at St. Mungo's."

Healer Bliss deposited the dinner tray onto Hermione's bedside table and turned to her with an exceedingly enthusiastic air.

"How'd ya do, Miss Granger?!" She reached out and shook Hermione's limp hand fervently. "Like Judy said, I'm Healer Bliss… but you can call me Beatrice, everyone does."

"Healer Bliss! Please refrain from manhandling the patients!" Calhoun snapped and gestured to Beatrice's vigorous handshaking.

"Sorry, Judy!" Healer Bliss said while laying Hermione's hand back on the bed with the utmost care. Hermione estimated this healer to be in her early forties, she had a heart shaped face with rosy cheeks and very kind brown eyes. She exuded a maternal aura that was reminiscent of Molly Weasley.

Judith Calhoun began to correct the younger woman's use of the name "Judy" once more but refrained. She managed to hold back from rolling her eyes as she turned to Hermione. "I will be back later with some potions for you. In the meantime, I insist you get some rest."

Then, sensing Hermione's unspoken question, she added, "Your guests will be allowed to return after you have eaten and had sufficient sleep." With one more scathing look toward Healer Bliss, the older woman strode from the room.

Hermione sank back into the bed. She felt so helpless, like a petulant child whose parents were keeping a secret from her 'for her own good'. She was frustrated and would have insisted on speaking to Lily and James at once but she was growing more exhausted by the second.

Her eyelids began to droop, despite her forcefulness to remain awake, when Healer Bliss' bouncing voice roused her. "It's a miracle your vitals are so strong, Miss Granger," She said encouragingly as she glanced over the patient's chart. "Quite a miracle considering your nearly catatonic state when you were brought in last month."

"Last month?" Hermione repeated, not meeting the Healer's eyes. "I have been here for… a month?"

"Yes, dear! Slept right through Christmas, you did. But look at you now! You must be so happy to be up and surrounded by loved ones, eh?"

Hermione nodded mutely, her eyes fixed on the starched white bed sheets, brow furrowed. An entire month she had been laying in this bed? A month and her entire world had changed. Had she been dreaming the entire time?

She remembered flashes of blue light… she remembered… she remembered things she shouldn't remember. James and Lily's wedding… The night Voldemort tried to kill Harry… Peter, not Lily, sacrificing himself to protect his best friend's son…

"Yes, you are a very lucky girl, dear."

"Yes… thank you," Hermione, pulled from her reverie, answered politely, straining to place a smile on her face in appreciation of the Healer's efforts to cheer her up.

She remembered being introduced to Sirius… and the battle at the Ministry… Bellatrix falling behind the veil. Had she really changed the timeline so much?

Beatrice set the dinner tray before Hermione and chattered on as she arranged the various dishes and utensils.

"Oh yes. I have never seen so many people so anxiously waiting for a single patient before! D'you know, we had to ask nearly fifteen people to leave nearly every night after visiting hours were over?"

"Oh?" Hermione wished the healer would leave her alone to her thoughts. The woman was just trying to help, Hermione knew that, but she was completely emotionally and physically drained as she tried to reconcile the past, present and piece together everything that had changed.

Healer Bliss continued as she fluffed Hermione's pillow and made a few quick notations on her chart.

"And _what_ visitors too! It has been like the society pages of 'Witch Weekly' around here! A regular Who's Who of the Wizarding World!"

Hermione nodded along, not really listening at all. Her mind was spinning and, above all, she was yearning to see Sirius, to at least get answers to her many questions. Where was he? Was he alright? Why hadn't he been among her many visitors…

She feared the worst. That fear coupled with her total exhaustion kept her from leaping out of bed and forcing answers out of Lily or James… or anyone who would know something, anything.

Somewhere in the background, Beatrice Bliss rattled on.

"Of course, Lily Potter is a resident Healer here at St. Mungo's but young Harry has been here every night. Oh yes, he's so handsome and so brave, that boy! Always here with the Weasleys, the girl and Mister Ronald. They've been worried sick about you, Miss."

Hermione tentatively picked at a dinner roll on the tray before her, now hearing only bits of Healer Bliss' animated chatter.

"…Even Dumbledore himself was here more than once!... had Minister Shacklebolt assign an auror to full time security duty in this very room… the Head Auror himself… even on Christmas Day, sat right in that corner…"

Hermione's attention was captured at once. She remembered something else… it seemed part of that dream almost but in it she knew Sirius to be an auror. Could it really have been true…?

"Did you just say an auror was here?" Hermione asked with anticipation.

Healer Bliss stopped suddenly, she had nearly forgotten Hermione was in the room she had been rambling on so. Happy to have a captive audience for the moment, she smiled excitedly.

"Yes! Dumbledore's orders. He insisted that the Ministry provide you with security detail day and night, and you know what? He demanded that _the_ Head Auror take the case. Never in all my years have I ever seen anyth- "

"Who – Who is the Head Auror?" Hermione interrupted hastily, her heart thumping wildly. A sudden rush of adrenaline providing her with the energy she had been lacking.

Beatrice's eyes widened with dramatic flair, "The Head Auror? Why, it's Mister Bl- "

"Healer Bliss!" Both the healer's and Hermione's heads turned toward the door swiftly as Healer Calhoun's commanding tone shot at them. "Miss Granger needs her rest. I sincerely hope that you are not keeping her from sleep by burdening her with the latest news from the gossip columns!" She crossed the room and held a vial of lavender fluid in front of Hermione's face, wordlessly ordering her to drink.

Hermione took the vial and drank it quickly and obediently, eager for a definite answer from Beatrice.

Healer Bliss smiled remorsefully at her supervising Healer and flushed. "No, Judy. I was just… "

"I'm sure you were," The elder woman said firmly. "You are excused, Healer Bliss."

The younger healer smiled comfortingly at Hermione and turned towards the door.

"Wait!" Hermione spoke up quickly before Beatrice left the room. "You didn't tell me… the Head Auror? Who is it?"

Healer Calhoun placed a firm hand on Hermione's shoulder to keep her from jumping out of the bed. However, the effects of the Sleeping Draught that she had just swallowed were strong and Hermione felt the tension and energy flooding out of her body rapidly.

Beatrice smiled gently at her patient. "It's Mister Black. Sirius Black is the Head Auror." With a final nod, she turned and left the room.

* * *

**Thoughts?? **


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**Thank you to AnasellaEmm who stays up with me into the wee hours of the morning to provide creative and moral support. You're wonderful, doll.**

**Author's Note: **I know it has been centuries since I updated this story. I beg your forgiveness and in hopes of using bribery to get back in your good graces, I have added a photo of "Adult Sirius" to my profile for your enjoyment.

Also, AnasellaEmm has created an amazing banner for this story. See my profile for the link!

**Chapter Nineteen.**

* * *

Hermione felt herself regaining consciousness as the effects of the Dreamless Sleep Potion began to subside. She shifted slightly beneath the stiff hospital sheets and winced as her body ached with the effort.

She sensed the vacant darkness around her before she even opened her eyes. The moonlight streamed through the open window above her bed and cast its silvery light upon the opposite wall. How long she had been sleeping was anyone's guess, but it was clear she had lost at least another day to her unconscious state.

Her mouth was extremely dry. She tried to swallow, but her throat felt raw.

"Healer Bliss?" She tried to call but not a sound came from her parched throat.

She needed water.

Her muscles screamed with resistance as she pushed herself up to a sitting position and looked around for her wand so she might conjure herself a glass of water.

The wand was not in plain sight as far as she could make out in the shadowy room. She had no idea where her belongings had been placed and began to fear that her wand had been left behind at Hogwarts… twenty-two years ago at Hogwarts.

An armoire near the door looked promising but in her weakened state the distance from her bed to the wardrobe seemed overwhelming. Her body was already aching to lay back down, her eyelids drooping. The feeling of losing control of her will and her body scared her. Ever independent, it pained her to be unable to care for herself.

She licked her lips dryly and, with as much determination as she could muster, she slid forward until her feet hit the cold stone floor. Bracing herself on the bed rails, she shifted her weight to her feet and rose to stand on her unsteady legs.

The month of immobility had weakened her every muscle and as the blood rushed to her lower limbs, she shivered, realizing how little warmth the thin, cotton hospital gown provided.

She held her breath and, with her right foot, took one shaky step forward. Gripping the rail more tightly, she stepped with her left foot; then another two steps. Slowly, she crossed the room, and seized the wardrobe handles to balance herself as soon as they were within reach. The doors swung open easily and she was pleased to find the familiar jeans and sweater she had been wearing hanging before her.

She squinted into the cupboard but did not see her wand anywhere. She felt around the few shelves in the darkness. Empty. It was not in the pocket of her jeans either. Her wand was gone.

Reaching for the sweater, she hoped there was a pocket in the woolen garment she may have missed. Involuntarily, she thought back on everything that had happened the last time she had worn it. She remembered it being singed when she had cursed Alecto Carrow. She remembered marring the midnight blue wool to wipe blood from a cut on her shoulder. The stain still remained on the sleeve, she noticed, feeling it lightly.

Then she remembered Sirius pulling the sweater over her head feverishly before they had finally and completely been together, as one. She remembered the garment lying in a heap of discarded clothing beside the bed. She remembered frantically grabbing the sweater and pulling it back on when she and Sirius bolted out the door to the fight awaiting them below.

Before she could stop herself, she gathered the fabric in her fists and brought it to her face, breathing in the scent deeply. Her body flushed with warmth at the sensations evoked by the smell. It smelled of him… an indescribable natural musk that bore hints of faded cologne and… just him.

The search for her wand fruitless and her desire for water forgotten, Hermione clung to the sweater. She pulled it from its hanger and distractedly returned to her bed.

Curling up beneath the sheets, she hugged the sweater to her chest and closed her eyes.

She breathed him in again. And again.

Imagining Sirius was fast beside her as she fell back into the relief of slumber.

* * *

"James is worried, I know, but Sirius refuses to discuss it."

"Yes, Remus said the same. And Sirius can be so… so… stubborn. I ought to know, he _is_ my cousin."

Lily smiled in agreement as she poured a second cup of tea for herself and Tonks, as she still heartily insisted on being called though her last name was now 'Lupin'. As was habit, the women and their husbands had gathered at the Potter's London estate on the cool Sunday afternoon.

Beyond the kitchen window, Lily could see James and Remus seated outside on the grounds, speaking earnestly to one another. Missing from their small party today was Sirius, as he had been every Sunday since Hermione's return. He never left St. Mungo's.

"Stubborn is only one part of Sirius' problem, I'm afraid," Lily sighed. "James said he would go to the hospital later tonight to speak to him. Harry is there now with Ron and Ginny visiting Hermione."

"Oh!" Tonks winced suddenly and put a hand to her swollen belly. "Ugh… That was a big one," she breathed heavily as the pain began to subside.

Lily jumped from her seat and reached out towards the younger woman.

"What is it? Not a contraction, you aren't due for another – "

"No, no, it's alright," Tonks assured her. "Just a swift kick, I think. He tends to grow more energetic near the full moon… just like his father."

The women shared a knowing laugh.

"I told you that the full moon would likely affect the baby's activity levels."

"And you were right to warn me! There are nights that I am positive I am carrying an entire Quidditch team inside me," Tonks teased sarcastically.

"Let's hope not," Lily laughed gently. "You keep calling the baby a 'he'. How can you be so sure it is a boy?"

Tonks shrugged and smiled wistfully to herself. "Just a feeling. I do like the idea of a miniature Remus though. Can't you picture it?"

"Oh yes, _he_ will be adorable. Just like Harry, he looks so like James."

Tonks grinned and shifted her eyes to the two men talking outside.

"Sirius will come around. He's a Black, we're very resilient," she said to assure them both that their husbands needn't worry.

Lily's downcast eyes were not convincing but she straightened her back and nodded. "Yes, of course."

"You are a terrible liar, Lily," Tonks said with concern. "What is it?"

"It's just – You were so young, you probably don't remember how he was after she left. It was ages before he was himself again and I'm afraid we may not be able to get him back this time."

"Oh. Remus has told me a bit. I know he's said that he and, um, Nadine, were living with him then, after you all finished school." She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. It was always somewhat awkward for her to speak about Nadine, Remus' first love and one-time fiancée.

"Yes... that's right," Lily drifted off as she thought back to all those years before. She spoke softly as though she was afraid speaking loudly would make the past real again, it was safer to tread lightly. "The day that Hermione left there was a huge fight at Hogwarts. It was awful. James was… he was… Crucio'd."

"Oh my god," Tonks gasped. "I didn't know."

"It was horrible. Sirius was hurt as well, pretty badly. He was unconscious for nearly an hour. There was so much commotion. When he finally came to, he kept asking for Hermione but she had gone… 

disappeared into thin air amidst the chaos. I guess she had told James earlier that day that she was going to leave Hogwarts so we all just assumed- "

"That she'd left on her own? On purpose?"

"Without saying goodbye to Sirius," Lily affirmed.

"Didn't he try to look for her?"

"He didn't have to, as it turned out. It seems Dumbledore had known all along that Hermione had been from the future and he figured out that she had returned to her own time. He told James and Sirius everything when they informed him that Hermione was missing."

"Merlin, how did Sirius take the news?"

"He was a wreck. Dumbledore said that he couldn't be sure from how far in the future Hermione had come but that he was certain she was safe, wherever she was."

"So, Sirius didn't think he would ever see her again?"

"None of us knew for sure and Dumbledore only said so much. Hermione had left a note that seemed to suggest we would meet again but when and where… there was no way to tell."

"How awful for him," Tonks said. "He must have been devastated."

"He just shut off," Lily said with sad recollection. "After graduation he went to live at Godric's Hollow with James' family and he was just… lifeless. It was nearly a year before he would even speak about her. I think the next time any of us saw him genuinely smile was at James' and my wedding. After that he moved into a flat with Remus and Nadine in London, began his Auror training and, well, it was a long time before he was himself again."

Tonks bit her lip and looked down at the table. "But- he… he must've gotten over it… he didn't stay 'shut off'."

"It wasn't until Harry was born that the old Sirius really started to shine through again. Being a Godfather became the most important thing in his life."

"That I remember," Tonks smiled faintly. "I was very young, but I do remember that Sirius was always bursting with pride at Harry's every accomplishment."

Lily beamed at the memory.

"Oh yes, Sirius has always been like a second father to Harry. He had so much to distract him during that year that, at least to some extent, he was able to put Hermione from his mind." The smile faded from her delicate features. "After that, everything just happened so fast. We learned about the prophecy; that Voldemort was going to try to kill Harry. Then … we lost Nadine and Peter, he- he died protecting Harry. It is still so awful to think about that night."

The two women fell into a contemplative silence. Lily stirred her tea somberly, the clinks of the teaspoon on the porcelain glass chimed loudly in the otherwise quiet kitchen.

Tonks glanced at a photo of Harry, Ron and Hermione that hung on a wall above the stove and a question occurred to her. She cleared her throat.

"Lily, how did Sirius react when he found out that Hermione was at school with Harry? I mean, he must've been… I don't even know what he must have felt."

"I don't think he even knew what to feel. I think part of him was devastated, knowing that they would never be able to be together, her being so young, and the other part was intrigued, he wanted to know everything he could about her, about who she was before she came into our lives."

"That sounds… complicated," Tonks said with a furrowed brow.

"It was," Lily admitted. "I still remember the shock when Harry told James and me all about this girl in his house at school, Hermione Granger. He called her a "know-it-all", we knew immediately it was _our_ Hermione."

Tonks raised her eyebrows and giggled. "That does sound like her, brilliant girl."

"Yes," Lily grinned back at her. "We were delighted that Hermione turned out to be such a wonderful friend to Harry, even though they didn't seem to start off on the right foot. Sirius took it pretty hard though. We knew it was only a matter of time before Harry – "

"Someone say my name?" Said a voice from the doorway.

Lily and Tonks both jumped as Harry walked into the kitchen.

"Harry! You startled us," Lily said uneasily, not knowing how long he had been standing there. "Did you need something? Are you all set to go back to Hogwarts tomorrow morning?"

"All set," He nodded.

Dumbledore had allowed Harry, Ginny and Ron to return to London for a couple of days to see Hermione and they were due to go back the next day. After the trying year they had all had, with Hermione disappearing and Voldemort growing ever stronger; Harry was grateful that he had only four months left before he would be finished with school. He had been accepted into the Auror training program and would be starting at the end of the summer, pleased that he would be properly equipped to face the most evil wizard of all time.

Harry ran a hand through his messy hair and looked out the window at his father and Remus who were heading back towards the house from the yard.

"Mum, I – "

"Hello, son," James, just coming into the kitchen with Remus, greeted his only child with a clap on the back. "Remus was just saying that he will be seeing you back to school tomorrow. He'll activate a portkey to leave first thing."

"Fine, I just – "

"And don't forget to pack your sweaters," Lily added. "It will be cold at sch –"

"Mum!" His abrupt interruption silenced Lily. He took a deep breath and spoke with restrained irritation, "I'm sorry, I just – "

"What's the matter, sweetheart?" She asked, her brow creased with concern.

Harry looked accusingly between his parents and the Lupins.

"I just want to know when exactly you all were planning to tell me about Sirius and Hermione?"

* * *

As was becoming routine, Hermione felt herself emerging from sleep in the middle of the night. It was plain to her that it was nighttime as the hospital was only so still in the small hours of the morning.

But this night, something was different. The ward's usual silence was being interrupted by voices from just outside her room. Though they spoke in hushed tones, two men seemed to be arguing.

Hermione raised her head slightly to train her ears on the voices.

"If you aren't even going to speak to her then why don't you just go home?"

"Dumbledore's orders, remember?"

"Quit using Dumbledore as an excuse. I heard him tell you himself that you needed to get some rest. If you're so concerned about her wellbeing, then I will stay tonight in your place."

"No."

It was Sirius. She recognized that sound instantly. His voice was unmistakable. He had finally come! Hermione's heartbeat began to race and she pushed herself up as quickly as she could manage.

"She's been awake and the healers say she will recover in due time. I remained quiet for the entire month you camped out in this hospital after she'd returned but there is no reason for you to stay now, especially if you aren't going to see her when she's awake!"

She recognized the other voice as James… and he was angry. Hermione stood on unstable legs and leaning on the rails, once again made her way across her room, towards the door. Her only guiding thought was that she had to reach him. If he had been to see her when she was asleep then she wouldn't miss him now when she was finally awake to greet him.

"It's late. You should go home," Sirius said with apparent resignation.

"Look who's talking. And don't try to change the subject. She was asking for you, Sirius! We can't avoid her questions forever. What are we supposed to tell her?"

"Tell her whatever you like."

Hermione halted. The edge in Sirius' voice was clear and cold.

"I won't lie to her. She's been through enough."

"Then don't lie."

"You want I should tell her the truth? That you refuse to speak to her? That you're a stubborn arse who won't listen to reason?"

"Like I said, tell her what you like."

None of what was being said made any sense to Hermione. What reason would Sirius have to not want to see her? Hadn't he been yearning for her just as she had for him? Hermione again began moving slowly towards the sliver of light coming in from the doorway.

"Will you listen to yourself? This is Hermione we're talking about, for Merlin's sake! Just let her see you. Let her see that you're alright. She's worried for you."

"No."

Hermione could now make out their silhouettes through the slightly ajar door.

"The last time she saw you, Sirius, she thought you were dead. She is only going to sit idly by for so long before she starts asking more questions."

James' plea was met with a chilly silence from his lifelong friend, who frostily averted his gaze.

"Dammit, Sirius! The poor girl was torn away from her friends and family and sent to a foreign time only to be ripped away again. Imagine how she must be feeling right now."

Stretching out her arm, Hermione's fingertips grazed the doorframe. She whispered his name but it went unnoticed in James' outburst.

"How _she_ must be feeling?! How SHE- What about me?!"

James sighed and when he spoke, his voice was calm.

"She deserves an explanation. You owe her that."

"Sirius?" Hermione spoke weakly from the doorway.

The two men froze.

Hermione took one step into the hallway, her delicate figure bathed in the dull light of the hospital corridor. Her angelic expression marred with uncertainty, she trained her gaze on Sirius' face as she finally laid eyes upon him after wishing for him for so long.

Against the light she couldn't see his expression… not at first, only the glitter in his jet dark eyes. But as she became adjusted to the brightness, every familiar feature was revealed to her. The high slash of cheekbones, the aristocratic nose, and the slightly forbidding mouth which failed to softened as he took in the sight of her.

He clenched his teeth, squaring his jaw and shifted his stare back to James.

"I don't owe her anything," He said stiffly. Without another glance in Hermione's direction, he turned and exited the hospital ward, leaving James gaping at his retreating figure.

Hermione's very breath was wrenched from her lungs and her legs gave out beneath her. She called out Sirius' name once more but it was James, not Sirius, who caught her before her defeated body collided with the ground.

* * *

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	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

As always, thank you to my Beta, AnasellaEmm, for our late night writing fests and her encouragement.

**Chapter Twenty.**

* * *

Sirius came crashing through the door of Grimmauld Place and slammed it shut behind him with such intensity, the portraits on the walls stirred and cursed him for awakening them.

James would certainly be barging in any moment. After Sirius had left the hospital without a word to Hermione, he knew James would have a few choice words for him.

He knew what he had done was wrong. More than wrong, it was malicious.

He'd known all along that he would have to face her eventually, but having guarded her around the clock for an entire month, he had almost been content to leave her in the unconscious state. At least that way he wouldn't ever have to face what he knew would inevitably come.

She would remember, he thought bitterly.

Throwing his coat onto the stairs as he walked through the semi-darkness, he continued along the corridor, catching his ragged reflection in the hallway mirror. He stopped and glared at his pitiful self.

"Fool," He swore at the pained face that stared back at him.

He recalled when Hermione would come to his home with Harry, he would sometimes watch her at meals. Just watch, and revel in her brilliant mind and her fierce loyalty to Harry. He was proud of the girl she was. A girl who looked at him, with passing glances, as no more than her best friend's godfather.

But all the time he waited with unease. Waited for the day she would disappear without a trace. And he waited for the day she would return.

And just as he had feared, the moment their eyes met in the dim corridor of Saint Mungo's only moments earlier, he could see that she remembered.

He finally saw the recognition in her eyes, the recognition he had both dreaded and hoped for, the acknowledgement that she knew all that had been between them and what they had once meant to one another.

After so many years, he could read in the depths of her chocolate eyes that she remembered. She wanted him.

The front door slammed open behind him and he instantly pushed away from the mirror, whirling around to see his best friends bursting into the house.

"What in the hell has gotten into you?!" James shouted as he marched in, Remus fast at his heels. "How could you say that to Hermione just now?"

Sirius turned and strode furiously down the corridor, ignoring his friend's comments.

"I don't know what has gotten into you ever since Hermione's been back but this isn't you, Padfoot. You aren't a cruel person, but here you are, treating the woman you lov – "

"Don't!" Sirius shot the warning over his shoulder as he stormed down the stairs into the kitchen.

"So, you are just going to ignore her forever?" James demanded. "She is your godson's best friend; you won't be able to avoid seeing her."

Sirius swung open a cupboard and pulled out a bottle of firewhiskey that he slammed onto the counter. Pouring himself a liberal glassful, he downed the golden-brown liquid in one shot.

"You can't ignore her, Sirius," Remus spoke in quieter tone. "What do you intend to do about it?"

Sirius emptied another glass of firewhiskey down his throat and poured a third. "I got over her once. I can do it again."

"Did you, Padfoot? Did you really get over her?"

"Don't patronize me, Remus," Sirius growled, brushing past the two men forcefully. "Of course I got over her. It's been over twenty years for god's sake."

He sat down roughly at the long wooden dining table, gripping the glass of whiskey in his hand.

James and Remus sat down across from him.

"Why are you really doing this, Padfoot?" Remus asked. "You've always been perfectly decent to Hermione since she and Harry became friends. I am aware it was, by no means, easy for you but you've never been outright cruel to her."

Sirius sighed and took a long swallow from his glass. "I'm done talking about her."

"You haven't even said anything!" James argued.

Remus held up a hand to calm James before turning to Sirius, "How can you be so indifferent, Sirius? What has she done that is so terrible?"

Sirius laughed bitterly. "She stayed exactly the same. I grew twenty-two years older and she stayed exactly the same."

"That's the problem? You think you're too old?!" James asked incredulously.

Sirius shook his head and stared down into his glass as he swirled its contents mindlessly.

James narrowed his eyes, barely controlling his own anger. "You're so vain about having aged that you think it's within your rights to treat an innocent girl like a criminal? Harry doesn't take issue with it, why should you?"

Sirius' head snapped up instantly. "Harry?! How the hell does Harry know about Hermione and –"

"We told him this afternoon," Remus interrupted with his usual even tone. Sirius began to argue back but Remus continued on intently, "He apparently overheard Lily and Nymphadora speaking about Hermione. He was rather upset at first and, understandably, had many questions. We had no choice but to tell him."

"No choice?" Sirius rose from his seat, hands planted firmly on the table before him. He seethed through bared teeth, "Of course you had a choice. You chose to tell him something that you had no right to tell!"

"You would rather we lie to him, Sirius?" Remus asked.

"Better that than dredging up the past."

"We can't be responsible for dredging up a past that you never managed to bury in the first place!" James shot back. "And I refuse to lie to my son for you. I have never lied to Harry and I won't start now!"

James slammed his fist on the wooden table, punctuating his statement.

The three friends sat in silence for a long time, not moving, not looking at one another. Sirius finished the remainder of his whiskey, and crossed the kitchen to pour himself another drink. He paused with his hand on the bottle and exhaled heavily.

With his back to his friends, he spoke in a low voice, "What did Harry say… when you told him?"

Remus and James exchanged a brief look of hesitation.

"He was upset," James said honestly, apologetic after his outburst. "He was upset that we had hid this information from him. He felt that he had been betrayed."

"By me?"

"By all of us. When she disappeared, it was hard enough for him to accept that she had gone back in time. Now this. He was… angry. He _is _angry."

Remus spoke up then, "But we explained to him what happened in the past. We told him that you and Hermione had a very deep connection and how difficult it was for you when she left."

"He understood after that, Padfoot. He did," James added. "He's angry at me, not you. He only wants what is best for you. And for Hermione."

"What is best for _her_ is for me to stay away then."

"But she lov-"

"She's too young to know what she wants!!" Sirius shouted. His voice broke off with restrained emotion.

"You know that isn't true," Remus reasoned. "If anyone is capable of making a mature, adult decision, it is Hermione. She is of age and she knows what is best for her."

"She is seventeen years old! With an entire, goddamned lifetime ahead of her… and I'm – I'm… well, look at me. She'll move on. Find someone younger. Someone better for her."

For the first time, Remus' tone showed warning signs of anger. He stood bracing himself on the table, "Dammit, Sirius. I know we can only imagine what it must have been like for you all these years, but she is here now and she deserves a chance. It wasn't her fault that she left. You can't blame her forever!"

"What the hell do you want from me!?" Sirius strode across the kitchen furiously to face James and Remus, glaring determinedly at each in turn. "I helped to raise your son, James. I treated him as my own flesh and blood and never failed to be there for him when you and Lily couldn't be. Remus, I have spent my entire professional life fighting against the Werewolf Discrimination Laws so you could make a better life for yourself. Not once have I ever asked a thing of either of you. So. Just. Leave. It. Alright? Just leave it."

James stood and met Sirius' severe gaze head on.

"Is that really what you want, Padfoot?" He posed seriously.

Sirius turned away from his friends, his shoulders sagged and he closed his eyes. He was tired. The stance and expression bore the telltale signs of defeat.

"Yes."

James and Remus glanced at each other. James shrugged, frustrated at his friend's obstinacy. Remus nodded and looked concernedly at Sirius, who remained adamantly turned away. They offered their goodbyes to a mute Sirius before they departed.

Once he was alone again, Sirius turned back to the empty room. He began to pour himself another glass of firewhiskey but stopped. It wouldn't help. It never did.

He may have been able to lie to James and Remus, but nothing, not all the firewhiskey in England, could have made him numb to the sensation of seeing Hermione look at him that way again.

* * *

It was just after dawn the next morning when an eruption of green flames from the Potter's hearth announced the arrival of Ron and Ginny.

Ron stepped out of the fireplace behind his sister and stretched his long arms above his head, emitting a dramatic yawn.

"Bloody hell, it's early," He mumbled, dropping his duffel bag on the hearth rug and collapsing into an overstuffed chair.

"Good morning, Ron," Lily greeted the sluggish young man as she walked into the drawing room. "I thought I heard you arrive."

He jumped to his feet immediately. "'Morning," He answered sheepishly, reddening slightly with embarrassment at being caught cursing by Harry's mum.

"Harry is just sitting down to breakfast. Why don't you go on into the kitchen and help yourself to something?"

Ron did not need another word of encouragement. He was halfway to the kitchen before Lily had finished her sentence.

She smiled softly over at Ginny who rolled her eyes.

"He's already eaten, of course. Mum never lets anyone leave the house without being thoroughly fed."

"Oh, I'm well aware," Lily said before welcoming the young girl. "Good morning, dear."

"Morning, Mrs. Potter. What time is Remus coming with the portkey?"

"He should be here in about ten minutes. He wanted to make sure Nymphadora had everything ready to catch the train to Hogwarts this afternoon."

Ginny cocked her head in question. "Why can't Tonks just come with us now?"

"It isn't advisable for pregnant women to travel by portkey seeing as one can never guarantee a smooth landing. She'll be taking the Hogwarts Express later today, I'll be bringing her to King's Cross in a few hours."

"I'm sure Remus is anxious to get back to school, especially since Professor Snape has been teaching his Defense Against the Dark Arts classes for the past week."

"Yes, I'm sure he is," Lily smirked.

Ginny glanced at the clock and saw that they still had a few minutes before Remus would be arriving. She made herself comfortable on the loveseat near the fireplace and turned to Lily.

"Mrs. Potter, do you know how soon Hermione will be able to return to school?"

Lily raised her eyebrows slightly and pursed her lips in thought. "That's up to Hermione, really. She still has to get a bit stronger before she'll be fit to leave the hospital and then, if she decides to go back, she'll be under Madam Pomfrey's care – "

"If? _If_ she decides to go back?"

The older woman sighed. "There is a chance Hermione may not want to return to Hogwarts. She has been through quite a trial and it may be best for her to focus on getting herself healthy again rather than worry about school."

"It's because of Sirius, isn't it?" Ginny asked with concern.

Lily started. "Did Harry tell you…?"

Ginny shook her head. "He didn't have to. It was clear that there was something more going on than we were being told. Hermione kept asking for him when she woke up. Then, I saw the way Sirius was looking at her but he wouldn't come close enough for her to notice him. It didn't make sense at the time."

"Um… yes, I believe the situation between she and Sirius will be extremely difficult for Hermione to overcome. She is already very fragile right now and the added emotional stress will not help the circumstances."

"Mum is worried sick about her. She is worried about both of them, really," Ginny added.

"'Morning, Gin," Harry said as he entered the room. Ron followed just a few steps behind, chewing a mouthful of toast.

"Hi Harry." Ginny stood and smiled up at him.

He wrapped her in a warm hug and dropped a chaste kiss on her forehead, aware that his mother was present.

"Did you get enough to eat, sweetheart?" Lily asked her son.

"Yes, Mum," He answered shortly.

Lily sighed, "Harry, please don't leave angry. We didn't think it was our place to tell you about what happened in the past."

Ginny nodded to Ron and the two of them walked silently from the room to give Lily and Harry some privacy.

"I understand that," Harry said resentfully. "But I don't agree. Did you think I wasn't grown-up enough to handle it?"

Lily moved to stand before her son and placed her hands on his shoulders, momentarily awe-struck at how tall he seemed to have become all of a sudden and how grown-up he now was. She looked up into his green eyes that could be mirrored reflections of her own.

"Harry, you have overcome so many tremendous obstacles for someone so young. Neither your father nor I have ever doubted your maturity. Merlin knows you've had to grow up too quickly as is. We have never lied to you, Harry. Neither has Sirius. Yes, we kept this secret from you but we, honestly, thought it would be best coming from him. He just was not willing to talk about it yet."

Harry looked at his mother and read the sincerity shining in her eyes.

"I know, Mum. I know," He sighed. "I'm sorry."

She embraced her son. "Don't be upset with your father either, dear."

"I'm not."

The doorbell chimed and reverberated through the house. Remus appeared at the drawing room door having shown himself in.

"Good morning," He acknowledged them tiredly. The full moon was nearing and, in addition, he had been late getting home from Grimmauld Place the previous night, after he and James had unsuccessfully tried to reason with Sirius. "Ready to go?"

"Yes," Harry nodded, reaching down to pick up his travel bag.

Ron and Ginny came through the door behind Remus and greeted him as they passed.

"We have just less than one minute before the portkey is activated," Remus informed them as he set a broken flower pot on the table before him.

Harry turned to his mother and gave her a quick hug. "Please tell Hermione that I will try to get permission to come see her next weekend."

"It's about time to go" Remus announced. "Touch the portkey, you three."

Harry placed a finger on the flower pot and turned back to his mum quickly. "And tell dad that… I'm sorry."

"Don't be, son," James said earnestly from the doorway where he had appeared just in time to hear Harry's apology. "Don't give it a second thought."

Father and son shared the briefest of smiles before the portkey whirled Harry away.

* * *

"Miss Granger? Are you awake, dear?"

Healer Bliss' loud whisper brought Hermione out of the haze she had fallen into since seeing Sirius the night before. The healer stepped quietly through the door, the still afternoon air in the sterile room was stale. The room's only occupant had refused to have any of the windows opened to the fresh air that day.

"You have a visitor! Are you awake?"

Hermione's ears pricked and she sat up quickly, her heart beating wildly. "Visitor? Who- who is it?"

Healer Bliss' face melted into a sympathetic smile. "It's Albus Dumbledore, dear. Quite exciting, yes?"

Hermione sank slowly back against her pillows and nodded. "Yes… of course. Very exciting."

The healer offered Hermione an apologetic look once more before she turned out of the room. She knew, as did every other employee at 's, that Albus Dumbledore was not the visitor for whom Hermione Granger had been waiting.

Outside in the hallway, she nodded to Dumbledore who thanked her before stepping into the hospital room.

"Good morning, Miss Granger," Dumbledore greeted as he approached the bed. "You are looking quite well."

"Thank you, sir," Hermione smiled weakly, mustering all her strength not to appear as devastatingly disappointed as she was.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm well, thank you."

Dumbledore scrutinized her with his crystal blue eyes before speaking again. "You will be pleased to know that you will be able to leave the hospital very soon. The healers are all very impressed with your progress."

Hermione nodded and looked down at her hands in her lap.

"All of Gryffindor will be eager to welcome you back."

She hesitated. "Professor Dumbledore?"

"Yes, Miss Granger?"

"What if – if I decide I don't want to return to Hogwarts… what happens then?" She asked softly.

"Ah," Dumbledore replied knowingly. Withdrawing his wand, he conjured a squashy arm chair, settling himself comfortably. There was a long moment as he allowed himself to observe the young woman, his chin resting on steepled fingers. "Should you not return to Hogwarts, I suppose your life will take a rather different path than the one you had planned, will it not?"

"Yes, I suppose it will."

"Have you given any thought to your future if you do decide to leave Hogwarts?" He asked as casually as if he were inquiring about the score of a Quidditch match.

"Some," She answered truthfully. "Not very much."

"Molly Weasley has informed me that you respectfully declined her invitation to stay at the Burrow. Am I to assume that you intend to take your leave from the Wizarding World altogether?"

Hermione averted her gaze, she opened her mouth to speak but nodded silently instead. She found herself suddenly overcome with shame having admitted her intentions to Dumbledore. "I- I think I might go to stay with my mum and dad for a while."

"Of course you must do what you feel is best, Miss Granger, though I will not attempt to deny that the Wizarding World will mourn the loss of one of its brightest young witches."

Hermione laughed sardonically to herself. "I'm afraid you've overestimated me, Headmaster. I've done nothing to earn the Wizarding World's esteem."

Dumbledore leaned back slightly and raised his eyebrows only a fraction but his surprise was evident. "You don't believe your accomplishments are worthy of praise, Miss Granger?"

"No, Sir. I don't," Her voice grew stronger with the brutal honesty behind her words. "Everything I am believed to have achieved are Harry's accolades and not my own. Anyone could have done what I did."

The pale blue eyes of the Headmaster twinkled with interest and, Hermione noted, amusement. "I am certain that Misters Potter and Weasley will disagree with you as will many others who have been impacted by the good you have done."

Hermione shook her head, tears beginning to threaten, burning behind her eyes. "Good?! What good have I done?? I had a golden opportunity to change terrible things from happening… I ended up in the past where I could have made a difference. But I did nothing. Neville's parents still ended up being tortured into madness by Bellatrix Lestrange! Peter and Nadine were both killed by Voldemort when they had nothing but the best intentions! For goodness sake, Voldemort is still alive! And it's just... all my fault."

Dumbledore sighed. "Miss Granger, it may seem to you that nothing was accomplished by your visit to the past but you are mistaken. I am aware of the drastically different course history may have taken had you not come to us when you had. Can you not think of one thing that you may have changed for the better?"

Her shoulders sagged in defeat. "James and Lily. But I didn't save them, please, don't ever credit me with their lives because it was Peter's loyalty and their many friends who came to their defense."

"But you set into motion the series of events that changed their destiny, Miss Granger. Just because this is the only present I know, does not mean that I am not able to comprehend the way it must have been in your time."

The bed creaked as Hermione shifted her weight to turn and face Dumbledore. "I'm sorry, sir. I mean no disrespect."

The older man smiled gently at the agonized girl. "There was something else you wanted to ask me?"

Hermione's eyes widened in surprise and she blinked rapidly. There was indeed something she had been yearning to ask. How Dumbledore could have known what she wanted to know was beyond her.

"Yes, Professor. I am so sorry to trouble you with this but I was curious how he, I mean, Sirius… how has he – "

"Sirius has led a very fulfilling life," Dumbledore said meaningfully.

Hermione relaxed somewhat as she absorbed that knowledge. "He has."

"Oh yes, Miss Granger. Sirius Black has spent his years protecting the Wizarding World and has loved Harry like his own son."

Hermione smiled sadly and her eyes welled with tears. The reassurance that Sirius had managed to live a happy life helped her accept that maybe she had done enough when she was in the past, enough to give him the life he deserved.

"I just wondered, sir," Hermione attempted to sound comforted. "He hasn't been to see me so…"

The serenity that always surrounded Albus Dumbledore never waivered, he spoke to Hermione as calmly confident as ever. "He did not leave this room once until you awoke from your unconscious state."

"I do not mean to argue, Headmaster, but he was only here because you ordered him to be here, as a guard," Hermione's heart ached to hear those words aloud.

"Ah, but Miss Granger, it is Sirius who gives the orders. He is Head Auror. I am merely Headmaster of Hogwarts. I have no authority over him. If Sirius had not wanted to be here, he would not have been."

Hermione was staggered.

She stared at Dumbledore with pleading eyes, wordlessly begging him to promise her that he meant what he said. She knew well enough that Dumbledore would never say anything to merely placate her. However, his words when combined with Sirius' behavior the previous day were too incongruent to comprehend.

Dumbledore's enlightenment _was_ reassuring but she had also never been more confused.

Outside the window, the sunlight was beginning to fade. Hermione's eyes traced the lengthening shadows the light cast across the room. With no more than a whisper, she said more to herself than to Dumbledore, "I don't know if things in this time will ever make sense to me again."

The Headmaster rose to his feet slowly, the conjured chair disappearing behind him instantly. He gazed down at Hermione over his half-moon glasses, his eyes twinkled again, but whether it was the light or his all-knowing self-assurance, she couldn't be sure.

"I have a feeling they will, Miss Granger. I have a feeling they will."

With a nod, Albus Dumbledore turned and left the room, leaving Hermione to contemplate her uncertain future.

* * *

**A/N: **If you have a chance to let me know what you think, please do! Thank you for reading!


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of JK Rowling's amazing characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **I will continue to apologize for the delay in updating and I won't make excuses. Just know that writing is my therapy and one of my favorite things to do so I promise that I do write whenever I possibly can. Thank you to all of you who send me notes of encouragement and review this story, it means more than I can say.

**Countess of Abe has created an amazing banner for this story with her infinite PhotoShop mastery. The link is in my profile!!**

Thank you to her, my Beta and friend, Countess of Abe (formerly Anasella Emm), for her demanding emails that get me to sit and write until the wee hours of the morning. You are so dear to me!

**Chapter Twenty-One.**

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* * *

  
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Harry paced impatiently back and forth in the Hogwarts Owlry. Hedwig should have returned by now but perhaps, Harry thought, this was a good sign. Maybe Hedwig had been delayed because Hermione had actually decided to respond to one of his letters for the first time in the two weeks since she had been released from St. Mungo's.

One could hope, at least.

Harry shuffled his feet and tightened his coat around him to ward off the winter chill. Just when he was ready to give up and head back, a flutter of white overhead caught his eye. Hedwig whooshed into the Owlry with a small rodent in her beak, obviously having returned fresh from the hunt.

"I'm guessing that means there's no response from Hermione then?" Harry questioned the snowy owl who was settling upon a perch in the corner. The bird regarded Harry for a second as if to say, "Sorry, mate" and turned back to her meal.

"Ruddy bird," Harry mumbled under his breath. He tightened his scarf around his neck and began trudging back through the snow to the castle.

* * *

"Hermione! Sweetheart, dinner's ready!" Mrs. Granger called.

She wiped her hands on her apron and exited the kitchen. She waited at the foot of the stairs but heard no reply from her daughter's room above.

"Hermione? Come on down!"

She cocked her head to side, listening for her daughter's voice. Again, she heard nothing. She sighed and began to climb the stairs slowly.

"Hermione?" She called again as she reached the top of the staircase.

A dull thud could be heard at the far end of the hall. Hermione's bedroom.

"Sweetheart?"

Another thud.

Mrs. Granger knocked lightly on the door before slowly pushing the door open. At first glance, she couldn't even tell if the room was occupied. The entire floor was buried beneath an awe-inspiringly huge pile of books. One stack was heaped so high it was actually completely obscuring one of the windows.

"What in heaven's name…"

"Mum!" Hermione appeared suddenly from behind one of the more precarious looking tiers of books. "Why didn't you knock?"

"Hermione! I did knock and I have been calling you for over ten minutes! What are you doing out of bed, young lady?"

Hermione pushed her unruly hair off her face and used the surrounding books to support herself as she rose to her feet.

"Mum, I have done nothing but lay in bed for the entire two weeks I have been here. Not to mention the month I was in the hospital before that. I can't possibly lie still for any longer. I'll go mad!" Despite her protest, it was readily apparent that Hermione was exhausted. Her strength, while getting better, was not yet at the level it once had been. "I just had to do something with myself."

Her mother glanced around at the jumble of various books. "I can see that, dear. What is it you are busying yourself with here?"

Hermione sat on the edge of her bed and looked around the room at her own personal library, avoiding her mother's acute stare. "I was hoping to organize the books I would like to keep and those that I won't be needing any longer."

Mrs. Granger followed Hermione's gaze to the now visible separation of the books. In one pile, marked 'Keep', were volumes of classic literature, science and history books. The second pile contained every school book Hermione had ever used at Hogwarts; tome after tome of titles such as _Magical Theory,_ _A Beginner's Guide to Potions_, and _Defensive Spells and How to Use Them_. Upon this stack was a slip of paper bearing the words 'Discard', in Hermione's neat script.

The older woman sighed and crossed the room, stepping over a number of books to sit beside her solemn-looking daughter. "Hermione, you know how pleased your father and I are that you have been here these two weeks. We couldn't be more delighted to have you back but… not at the expense of your happiness. If it were up to me, you would stay here forever – "

"-Perhaps I will."

"No, you won't. I cannot pretend to understand what you have been through, my dear, but you are still my daughter and I do know that living here, away from your friends, is not what you want. Go back to school, Hermione," She urged tenderly.

"I'm not sure that I can."

"Of course you can! In his letter, Headmaster Dumbledore said that Hogwarts would welcome you back whenever you felt you were ready."

"It isn't that, Mum." Hermione did not know how she could even begin to explain everything to her mother. "I'm sorry but you just wouldn't understand."

"Oh," Her mother replied, looking wounded that she couldn't truly be a part of her daughter's life, at least not where the magical world was involved. "Would… you like me to call or to come over instead?"

"No," Hermione said apologetically. "No, mum. It isn't… I – I'm just tired, I think. You're right, I should get some rest."

Mrs. Granger rose slowly to her feet and looked around the room once more, feeling helpless that she couldn't do anything to ease her daughter's obvious pain. "Of course, dear. Get to bed and I will save dinner for you to eat later."

"Thank you, Mum."

Hermione watched her mother leave. She wished so badly that she could feel that she belonged in this world; that she could be contented to stay among Muggles forever, but she was a witch and it would only be so long before she would have to return to the world she was meant to be a part of. Purging her room of any reminders of the magical world would never change that.

She glanced toward the window, partially hidden by her books, and slid the glass pane open a few inches. She reached for a sack on her desk and pulled out five owl treats which she placed on the windowsill before shutting the glass against the bitter chill that nipped at her fingers. If any of her friends' owls returned again the next day at least they wouldn't go hungry.

Hermione sighed and sat in her desk chair. She looked over the pile of parchment letters she'd received from her friends in the past weeks. Not one had been answered; she regretted this fact but she had no idea what to say to anyone or how to reply to their many questions. She was embarrassed for not returning to Hogwarts and for having left the hospital without explaining herself to anyone and she was still having a difficult time readjusting to the shock of returning to her own time so abruptly… especially when so much had changed. Above all, she could not even begin to wrap her exhausted mind around why Sirius had treated her the way that he had. She had done something… but what?

She reached for a pen and a sheet of the embossed stationary she'd received from her parents years ago but never used because she had only ever needed parchment. The pen felt heavy and foreign to her after using a quill for so many years. She laughed to herself at this, how the most ordinary things had come to seem so odd. It reminded her of Mr. Weasley.

She tapped the pen one, two, three times as she considered how to start her letter. With careful thought, Hermione began to write.

_"Dear James,_

_I am sorry I have not responded to either yours or Lily's letters until now. Furthermore, I apologize _

_that I am writing to ask a favor of you…"_

* * *

Two days later, at precisely four in the afternoon as was planned, the fireplace of James and Lily Potter's London home erupted in green flames, halting the conversation between the four adults already present in the room.

James, Remus, and Lily stood to greet Hermione as she stepped out of the hearth and into the Potter's sitting room.

"Hermione," James greeted the young woman with a warm smile and crossed the room to embrace her. "It's good to see you."

"Thank you, James," Hermione said with a tentative smile.

Remus stepped forward and began to offer his hand to shake Hermione's but, instead, wrapped her in a hug as well. "You're looking well, Hermione. How have you been?"

"I… I've been resting quite a bit as the healers instructed," Hermione answered, skirting around giving a more detailed answer. She could already tell from the looks on the men's faces that they were concerned about her.

Tonks, who remained seated on the sofa, grinned over at the younger girl. "I would give you a hug too but I'm a giant, pregnant whale and can't get up from the bloody couch without Remus' help." Hermione cracked a genuine smile at Tonks' irreverent humor and went over to give her a hug.

"I'm so glad you're here, Hermione," Lily said with a maternal overtone. "Please, have a seat."

Hermione perched herself on the armchair nearest the fireplace and glanced around at the group before her. It was a rather unsettling predicament in which she found herself. On the one hand, she had become very close with James and Remus while she was with them at Hogwarts, or the seventeen year old versions of themselves, at least.

But now she was faced with the adult versions of the very same men and felt that she must also act like an adult.

She wasn't sure at all how to behave in front of Lily. Though Lily Evans had never been anything but perfectly kind to Hermione while they were at Hogwarts together, Hermione suddenly felt ashamed for having harbored feelings for James while knowing full well that he and Lily were supposed to be together.

Lily sensed Hermione's discomfort and broke the silence.

"Can I offer you something to drink, dear? Tea?"

"No, thank you, Lil- … um, Mrs. Potter."

"Lily," She corrected. "Please call me Lily."

"Of course. Thank you, Lily." Hermione said nervously. She shifted her gaze to James. He had been more than pleased to have her over when she asked to meet with him but she had hoped that they would be able to meet in private. The pitying looks she was receiving from those present would only be made worse if they knew how hurt she was by Sirius' behavior.

As though she could hear these thoughts, Lily said, "Nymphadora, why don't we leave these three to talk amongst themselves?"

"Are you bloody joking?" Tonks scoffed. "I've only just gotten into a position that doesn't make some part of my body ache! Isn't it enough that my git of a husband dragged me here from bloody Hogwarts? If you think I'm going to be moving my arse even one centimeter, you will be sorely disappointed."

Remus chuckled under his breath. "I think what my wife is trying to say is – "

"- I'm not bloody well going anywhere," Tonks finished.

"And we wouldn't dream of asking you to," James said with an exaggerated bow. He gestured to Remus and Hermione then to the kitchen, "Shall we?"

Hermione nodded to Lily and Tonks, and followed James and Remus through the kitchen and out onto the grounds. It had snowed the night before and the vast expanse of lawn was frosted white, a perfect carpet of ivory all the way up to the border of imposing willow trees that enclosed the property.

A smooth cherry wood table and four cushioned chairs were nestled in a small brick courtyard off the side of the large estate home. Hermione noticed with relief that the courtyard seemed to have a heating charm in place already. She immediately felt the tender warmth on her skin as though she were bathed in sunlight. James led them to the table and Hermione took a seat across from he and Remus.

Hermione took in her surroundings for a few moments. "You have a beautiful home, James."

James and Remus exchanged a glance.

"What is it?" Hermione asked.

"It's nothing really," James began. "Just that, you have been here so many times before… I keep forgetting that everything must seem so out of place for you."

"Oh… yes, it does."

James shifted in his seat, he was sure he'd just said the wrong thing. "I was really happy to hear back from you. We had all begun to worry."

"Especially when we heard you wouldn't be returning to Hogwarts," Remus, ever the responsible one, chimed in. "You are missed greatly at Hogwarts, Hermione. By us teachers just as much as your classmates, I suspect."

Hermione appraised Remus' expression and was saddened to find disappointment in his eyes. Remus was always one with whom she felt a strong connection based on their shared love of learning and she had let him down, it seemed.

"I am sorry to have worried any of you. It isn't easy for me to stay away, I just – I… I'm very confused by so much of what's happened. I feel a bit out of place here now."

"Here, as in the present time?" James asked, his brow furrowed in question.

"Yes." She looked down at her hands in her lap.

Remus and James' eyes were on her, observing her, she could sense it. She could also tell that they felt sorry for her. The embarrassment burned in her cheeks as she thought of how pitiful she must seem to them, having run away to her parents' home rather than facing reality. She forced herself to take a long deep breath and focus on why she was here. It may only make them pity her more but at least she would have answers.

"Thank you for agreeing to meet with me, James. It seems so childish I'm sure that I've come to you about this but… I'm afraid I've no other choice."

James smiled and his eyes twinkled playfully. "Trust me, Hermione, you are not the childish one."

"James…" Remus warned.

"Fine, fine," James conceded. "That is why Remus is here. I know you asked to see me but I assumed, considering the subject matter, that you wouldn't mind another old friend shedding some light on this situation for you."

"Of course not," Hermione smiled, and fidgeted awkwarly. "So… can you, shed some light on the subject for me? I feel so silly asking but I have to know what I've done to make Sirius so angry with me."

Remus leaned forward comfortingly. "I can assure you with all honesty, Hermione, that Sirius' behavior is not the result of anything you have done."

"I'm sorry but I find that very hard to believe. You didn't see the way he looked at me."

"But I did," said James. "I am sorrier than anyone that you had to hear that conversation at St. Mungo's but it's no secret that Sirius can be a bit of a hothead when he gets upset."

"Why is he so upset with me though? How can he so clearly despise me?" Hermione's voice began to waiver slightly and she cut herself off. "Please just… whatever it is, I need to know."

Both men were silent as they considered how they might explain Sirius' conduct when they barely understood it themselves.

It was Remus who spoke first.

"After you were sent back here, to your own time, that is, it was not… easy for Sirius. The circumstances, strange as they may be, are that it has been twenty-two years for us since we were at Hogwarts together whereas for you, it has been just over one month. When we learned that you had been from another time and had thus been sent back, we had no idea when our paths might cross again, if at all."

"It was hard for all of us," James agreed. "And we can clearly see that it has not been easy for you either. Sirius, though, didn't really know how to move on… so in some ways, I guess he never did. Then when you and Harry became friends at school, it was like a ghost from the past or something…"

"A ghost?" Hermione whispered, her eyes widened and she looked to Remus.

"He means that you seemed to appear in our lives again out of nowhere. It was quite a shock. Sirius, though he never explicitly shared these feelings with anyone as far as I'm aware, was distraught. I'm not convinced that he had ever forgotten you to begin with but there you were, suddenly the best of friends with Harry, a bright young girl, yet still the very same Hermione. From that moment on, he knew it was only a matter of time before you would, again, be sent back in time and when you would return – "

"- I would know what had happened between us."

"Correct."

"So… has he… hated me all this time?"

James shook his head fervently. "If Sirius ever thought he hated you it was only to convince himself that he wasn't in lov – "

"James," Again, Remus warned him to watch his words.

"Right." James began again, "Sirius, more than any of us, was just so curious about you. He wanted to learn who you were before you came into our lives. Then a few months ago you were sent back in time, we all knew where you'd gone but we didn't know what would happen from that point on. We never knew what exactly happened when you left Hogwarts. Dumbledore could only theorize what had happened."

Remus tried to find a way to explain the rest of the story to Hermione, "Sirius was… that is while you were gone, he was rather unsettled…"

"He was a wreck," James stated bluntly.

"Yes, thank you, James," Remus said sardonically. "He was not in a good place, let's say. I believe he is feeling somewhat torn between the past and present, much like you are, I'm sure. You are, of course, much younger than he is, he has now been a witness to your coming of age, and I imagine he is struggling with reconciling all of these facts."

Hermione sat back in her chair. "I see," she exhaled heavily. "I can't believe it hadn't occurred to me that after twenty-two years he may not be so pleased to see me. Who could blame him, when I have interrupted what was probably a very happy life before I came back?"

"You haven't interrupted anything, Hermione," James reassured. "You belong here just as much as any one of us."

She nodded slightly but did not truly believe him. "Do either of you think there is a chance Sirius may change his mind? If you think it best that I simply let him live his life…," she swallowed hard at the thought, "then I won't bother him."

James started to adamantly oppose this idea but Remus stopped him.

"That isn't for us to say, Hermione," Remus said. "The only advice I can offer you, is to do with your life what you think is best for you." He smiled encouragingly.

What was best for her was to be with Sirius, she thought to herself. Now it seemed that, not only was there no chance of that happening but, it was now clear that Sirius was justified in his treatment of her. How inexcusably foolish had she been to think that a man like Sirius Black would waste his life on her? Could she have been so blind to think that everything could be just like it had been in the past?

"I appreciate both of you taking the time to explain everything to me," Hermione said as she stood up from the table. "Thank you for your honesty."

"Think nothing of it," James smiled. "Please don't vanish on us again though, eh? Keep in touch?"

"Of course. I'll see myself out. Thank you again, both of you."

She walked quickly back through the courtyard and disappeared into the house.

James and Remus stood on the snow covered ground and watched her go.

"He still loves her, Remus. She ought to at least know that," James said, looking toward the house.

"That isn't for us to say, Prongs. False hope is the last thing Hermione needs now."

It was quickly growing dark as dusk settled overhead, dark clouds promised another night of heavy snowfall. The two friends headed back into the shelter of the house.

Hermione felt sick. She was disgusted with herself for being so selfish and expecting Sirius to be waiting for her all these years later. She was ashamed at how weak she was to hide from the Wizarding world. She was horrified that it was her fault Sirius despised her.

After a hasty goodbye to Lily and Tonks, Hermione left the Potter's home. She did not take the floo back to her parents' house though. Instead, she departed through the front door and began walking up the path to the main road. The cold air bit at her face and exposed hands but she continued walking, fighting off the harsh chill.

Her head was pounding as a thousand contrasting thoughts swarmed her mind, each screaming at her to listen. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to silence her mind, to force the overcrowded chaos of her consciousness to cease its relentless disturbance.

There was only one thing she was sure of, one thing she knew had to be done.

She owed Sirius Black an apology.

* * *

A quick popping noise echoed off the walls of the homes all along Grimmauld Place. The sleepy street was empty; its residents were tucked away in their homes, sheltered from the bitter winter night. Unseen by muggle eyes, the sole occupant of Number Twelve, was just returning home from a thirty-six hour shift at the Ministry of Magic.

Sirius pushed open the front door of his home and stepped into the pitch dark corridor. He shrugged off his heavy, leather coat and slung it over the rack in the corner. It seemed to be colder inside the house than it was outside on the street, he thought jadedly. He strode through the house, his steps heavy with exhaustion. As he approached the parlor, he waved his wand mechanically and a fire roared to life, casting hard shadows across the otherwise dark room.

Just as he was about to slump into his large, worn armchair, three resounding knocks sounded from his front door. He ignored the disruption, turning back to the fire. Anyone he cared to see would not have bothered to knock. Besides, he was too tired for visitors.

The soothing, heat of the flames had just barely begun to warm his hands when three more raps on the door, again, interrupted him.

A threatening growl escaped his throat as he turned furiously away from the fire. He marched back down the corridor, not bothering to turn on any lights to welcome an uninvited guest.

He wrenched the door open with a snarl but stopped short when his eyes settled on the girl before him. Hermione stood on his doorstep; her cheeks flushed from the cold, snow flakes peppering her brown curls, and her face frozen in fear at the enraged expression on Sirius' face.

To her, he appeared a staggering figure; a Colossus, imposing as he stood in the shadowy doorway.

For some time, they just stared at one another. Sirius fought to maintain his sensibility, his emotions where Hermione was involved seemed to take on a life of their own.

She shivered. "Hello Sirius."

He nodded minutely.

"I'm sorry to show up unannounced but I was hoping to speak to you," Hermione tried to keep her voice somewhat casual but the nervousness on her face gave her away. When he did not respond, she went on, "It will only take a minute."

Sirius cleared his throat roughly.

"Please," she urged.

He inhaled sharply and stepped aside to grant her entrance into the gloomy home. She wrapped her arms tightly around her to ward off the bone-chilling freeze and entered the house, stopping directly in front of Sirius in the narrow corridor.

The mere inches between them, the closest they had been in longer than Sirius cared to imagine, were dizzying to him. He was tired but he had to be strong, he reminded himself.

He turned and headed back to the parlor where the warmth of the fire had now begun spreading somewhat through the room. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Hermione treading lightly behind him, her eyes on him questioningly.

He focused his attention on the fire, silently willing her to start saying whatever it was she had to say before he lost his temper or worse, his willpower.

Hermione edged closer to him while still allowing herself a measurable distance. Despite the icy silence, she found comfort in taking in the image of Sirius bathed in the orange light of the fire. She traced the fabric of the armchair with her finger.

"I'm not exactly sure how to start…," she confessed.

Sirius' shoulders tensed. "You came all this way. It is probably best if you just say what you need to say."

There it was. That voice. That rich, deep voice that had never failed to affect her. Despite the hostility of his comment, it was that voice that was almost her undoing.

And then it was as though her legs had a mind all their own. She began moving closer to him. With every step she felt the heat of the fire more intensely. She reached out her hand and lightly touched his arm.

He whirled around, startled. His eyes were ablaze as his gaze seared into her own.

She looked up at him, hurt clouding her eyes, and Sirius felt his restraint slipping away.

He was caught in the crossfire between his desire, which boiled inside of him stronger now than it had over twenty years, and his sense of self-preservation.

His heart began pounding thunderously away in his chest.

"Don't," he murmured.

Hermione stared up at him, at his weary face. Her yearning was clearly exposed and she gave up trying to hide it.

"Sirius…" The whisper escaped her lips and Sirius lost all rational thought.

He lost himself.

He reached for her blindly and crushed his lips to hers. His every sense was afire as he secured her firmly against his body.

He was overwhelmed; the scent, the taste, the feel of her… so much more powerful than any memory, so much richer than a dream.

There was no thought in his mind of who they were or who they had been. In place of his consciousness was only the overpowering emotion that forced every last thought from his mind.

Like he never had before, he disappeared into her. Touching her hair, cupping her face, drinking her in, over and over again.

Hermione kissed him back hungrily, her mind conscious of only him, of Sirius. She touched her hands to his chest, reveling in the heat of his body. She clung to him, clutching the front of his shirt in tight fists.

She trembled against him.

And then, as quickly as it had abandoned him, Sirius' sense returned. Shame and anger rushed over him, swallowing the rapture in which he'd momentarily lost himself.

He dropped his hands and reeled back. The distance between them was not enough though. The room became stifling. He couldn't breathe. He crossed to the far end of the parlor and turned his back to her, struggling for air, trying to calm his rapidly beating heart.

Hermione shuddered at the sudden chill in the room. "Sirius?" she choked.

When he turned back to her, his face was like stone and his eyes distant.

Her eyes were glazed and her face desperate, he noticed, furious with himself for losing his will, the only weapon he had against Hermione.

She swayed, unsteady on her feet, and gripped the edge of the armchair for balance.

"You should go," He said, his voice vacant of emotion.

"Go? What are you talking about?"

She looked so vulnerable at that moment that Sirius was flooded with guilt. He swallowed thickly.

The longer he stared into her wounded expression, the more he was engulfed in shame. He fought against the weakness with everything he had, forcing himself to remember the pain she had caused him. His temper began to rise and fury smothered the shame.

Sirius crossed his arms across his chest and glared into the fire.

"Sirius," Hermione attempted a smile at him. "I came over here tonight to – "

"What? Ruin me all over again?!" He interrupted, turning his glare on her.

Hermione inhaled sharply. "What are you saying?" Seconds ago she had been elated that Sirius seemed to have come around, that he was willing to give her another chance. She was completely and utterly dumbfounded. "Sirius, say something!"

"I've already asked that you go. What more do you want me to say?"

"What I want is for you to explain to me what is going on?" She cried. "A minute ago you were kissing me and now you're practically throwing me out of your house."

Sirius ran his fingers roughly through his short, black hair. "I'm not doing this again," he muttered under his breath.

"Excuse me?" Hermione asked.

Sirius' detached façade was beginning to crumble. He needed to get rid of her if he had any hope of sparing himself. "I shouldn't have kissed you. It was wrong of me but, if you feel hurt, you have no one to blame but yourself. I gave you what you wanted."

Hermione gasped. "What I wanted?"

It took every ounce of his might to keep the emotion out of his voice. "You are a seventeen year old girl caught up in some silly schoolgirl fantasy. What happened between us was over twenty-two years ago, Hermione. I am an adult and you need to move on with your life."

The words, the harsh, horrible words spat from Sirius' mouth, and knocked the breath from Hermione's lungs. She sank into the armchair behind her. Every fear that had crossed her mind, every worry about how he might possibly feel about her… all of it had been true. In his own words, it had been confirmed. He hated her. He hated her. He _hated _her.

Her breathing became ragged. She felt like she was drowning.

Tears welled in her eyes and blurred her view of the embers glowing in the hearth. But just as the sobs threatened to explode out of her, she froze. It was as though the fire dying in the fireplace had ignited within her. Hermione was not going to let this destroy her. She was not going to continue being the weak, pathetic creature she had become.

She stood and faced the devastatingly handsome man who had nearly caused her to forget who she was.

"Look at me," She said, her voice strong and sure.

Sirius was leaning heavily on the marble mantle. He did not take his eyes off the fading flames.

"Turn around and look at me!"

Sirius was at his breaking point. He had to get away from her. He started towards the corridor but only made it to the doorway before her voice stopped him again.

"You stop right there, Sirius Black, and listen to me!" She rounded on him, her eyes wild. "I am not a child. You cannot ignore me and you cannot speak to me as though I don't understand the consequences of my actions. You think I _ruined_ you? When I thought I had finally found the person I was meant to be with, I had my entire life uprooted for the second time in months, and you blame me for ruining _you_?"

Sirius' hand clenched the doorjamb as he braced himself against the wall, his back to Hermione as she spoke.

She shook her head in disbelief. "I cannot believe that I actually felt sorry for you. I came over here tonight to apologize to you for any hurt I may have caused but you know what, Sirius Black? It is _you _that owes me the apology. Better yet, save that apology for yourself because the only person who is going to feel sorry for you now, is you."

The knuckles on Sirius' hand turned white, he gripped the doorjamb so tightly. It was all he could do to keep from losing it.

"I don't know what I've done to deserve this treatment from you but what I do know is that I'm not running anymore. You wanted me to leave so badly, Sirius? Fine, I'm leaving."

Hermione was shaking as adrenaline coursed through her body. She was furious, and though she was certain that when the adrenaline rush faded the full impact of losing Sirius would hit her, at that moment she felt stronger than she had in recent memory.

She stormed across the room, ready to move on, just like Sirius had told her.

"What are you going to do now?" Sirius' low voice asked as she exited the room.

She paused only momentarily to announce proudly, "I'm going back to school. I think I owe that much to myself. After all, some prat once told me that I was the brightest witch of my age."

The ghost of a smile crossed Sirius' face at the memory. He nodded his head softly. "I did say that once, didn't I? I'm surprised you remember that." In an instant it occurred to him that maybe this could work. Maybe he could forget the anger, the pain... maybe...

"Hermione, wait."

Sirius pushed away from the door and turned around but was met with an empty room. He rushed into the corridor only to find that it, too, was vacant. A snow frosted gust of wind howled through the open doorway at the far end of the hallway.

She was gone.

* * *

**A/N: **If you can possibly forgive me for the long wait, I would very much appreciate any feedback! Thank you so much for reading.


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter nor any of JK Rowling's wonderful characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **I would like to sincerely thank my beta, **Countess of Abe**, for her tireless dedication to helping me write despite the two hour time difference between us.

My sincere thanks also go out to **Livia F**, who after so many months, still takes the time to motivate me, cheer me up, and inspire me.

This chapter is dedicated to you both. Thank you.

To all the readers out there, as always, your patience with me is so much appreciated. This year has not been an easy one for me and coming home to notes of encouragement and thanks from the amazing readers who have found this story gave me the strength to keep writing and to keep a smile on my face. To each of you, thank you.

**Chapter Twenty-Two.**

* * *

Hermione all but skipped down to the Great Hall from the Gryffindor common room. The Hogwarts corridors were abuzz with chattering students on their way to breakfast, and Hermione was bursting with exhilaration to be among them. This morning was the start of her first day back at Hogwarts. Visions of potions and ancient runes swirled in her head; she absolutely could not wait to get to class.

Approaching the large threshold of the Great Hall, she noticed with a swell of happiness and comfort that it was just as it had always been, in her own time and in the past. It seemed years since she had last been here though it was only seven weeks earlier that she had been in this very room in the midst of the battle during which she'd been sent back to her own time.

Of their own accord, her eyes travelled upward to the very spot where Sirius' body had been suspended in air before he fell to the ground, the last time she had seen him as a young man. A chill rushed down her spine.

The memories began to cascade in reverse through her mind before she could stop them. Sirius falling to the ground. Him protecting her throughout the battle. Hermione and Sirius, a fusion of bodies and passion, enveloped in one another's arms. A stolen kiss beneath a tree on a cool night…

A herd of chattering Hufflepuff girls hastened past her, and she was jostled to the side of the doorway, pulled from the past and thrust back into the moment. Hermione sucked in a sharp breath and blinked, opening her eyes to the activity all around her in the Great Hall.

"Hermione! Over here!"

Hearing Harry's voice, Hermione scanned the room for her friends. Harry stood up from his place at the Gryffindor table beside Ginny and called her again. Hermione waved to them and with one last wary glance toward the ceiling, she shook her head to forcibly remove the image of Sirius from her mind. 'No, Hermione. No,' she reminded herself again that there could be no thinking of him.

She sucked in a shaky breath and walked over to the group, taking the seat across from Harry, beside Ron. The familiar setting relaxed her, and she allowed a smile to spread across her face. The thrill of being back at Hogwarts began to creep over her once more.

Ron yawned loudly and passed Hermione a pitcher of pumpkin juice.

"No, thank you, Ron. I honestly think I'm too anxious to have breakfast this morning."

Ron looked back at her with perplexity. "What's with you?"

Hermione straightened and sniffed lightly. "Not all of us take the gift of a good education for granted, Ronald." Despite her tone, she nearly laughed aloud at the almost déjà vu scenario. How many times had she and Ron have this very conversation?

"It is really wonderful to have you back, Hermione," Ginny smiled from across the table. "We've missed you."

"We all thought you had decided to live amongst muggles forever!" Ron snorted. "Can you imagine?"

Hermione ignored him. "I have missed Hogwarts more than I thought possible. I can't wait to get to class and catch up on all that I've missed."

Harry chuckled. "I'm fairly sure there isn't anything our professors will teach that you don't already know." He leaned forward and placed his hand over hers on the table. In a quieter tone, he said, "It is great to see you. We were all a bit worried…"

"Nonsense," Hermione waved the comment away with her hand. "I just needed some time to get my strength back as the Healers ordered."

Harry and Ginny exchanged a momentary look of worry.

"If there is anything you ever need to talk about, you know I'm here for you. We are all here for you."

Hermione shot him a disparaging look. "I can't imagine what you mean, Harry, but I'm sure I'll be quite alright." She glanced at the giant grandfather clock on the far side of the Hall. "We have Transfiguration first thing. We had better go if we don't want to be late."

She stood and swung her bag over her shoulder, fussing unnecessarily with her robe.

"Hermione," Harry said from beside her in a voice barely more than a whisper. "I know this is going to be a difficult transition for you. Just let me know if you want to talk about Siri – "

The name froze in Harry's throat when he saw the expression on Hermione's face. She turned on him with a defiant stare … but it was the look in her eyes that silenced him. Beyond the mask of a glare, her eyes were vulnerable and wounded, exuding tremendous pain and a sadness that in all of his years, Harry Potter had only ever seen once before… in the eyes of his godfather when he'd first been introduced to a fourteen year-old Hermione Granger.

"Um…" Harry fought to think of something to comfort her. "Hermione, I – "

Hermione blinked and turned away. "We're going to be late if we don't hurry." Without another word, she began striding out of the Great Hall and off to the fourth floor classroom.

A concerned Harry, Ron, and Ginny hurried to follow in her wake.

When she looked back at Harry at the door of the classroom, he was surprised to find that the pained expression was gone completely. In its place, a confident air and a stoic façade, the mask that Hermione Granger would plaster upon her face from that moment on.

And so it was that the days and months slipped by.

Receiving top mark after top mark, Hermione never wavered in her determination to be the finest student ever to pass through the great halls of Hogwarts School. Not only that, but she seemed bound and determined to maintain the pretense that Sirius Black meant absolutely nothing to her, better yet, to steadfastly deny his existence.

Harry was worried. Through correspondence with his parents he had learned that Hermione had been to see Sirius briefly and that, whatever had transpired, resulted in her decision to return to Hogwarts to complete her seventh year. His letters to Sirius were always answered in a timely manner yet any questions he asked his Godfather about Hermione were conveniently ignored.

Speaking to Hermione about the issue was as productive as asking the Whomping Willow for help with his Ancient Runes homework… though he would likely get more of a reaction out of the Willow. Hermione, on the other hand, would sit in complete silence until the subject was changed or act as though she had not a clue as to what he was talking about. It was maddening.

The only solace Harry could find was in visiting Remus and Tonks in their rooms at Hogwarts. Though Remus had made the decision to cease in his interrogation of Sirius on the topic and could, therefore, not shed any light on the situation, he attempted to provide insight for Harry as to what his best friend and his Godfather were going through.

On many evenings, Remus tried explaining to Harry what had happened between Hermione and Sirius though, as Sirius had more often than not flat-out refused to speak of her for the past twenty-two years, there was not much he could say. He did, however, share how much Sirius had suffered when Hermione left and how he was reacting now that he had to face her all over again.

As comforting as it was for Harry to have someone who could provide him with some, if little, information, he wondered if it truly mattered at all when he still was so powerless to help.

Then there was Hermione. Hermione who was quick to answer every question posed in class, Hermione who dutifully studied her evenings away in the library, and Hermione who knew absolutely everything, it seemed. Hermione who laughed along with her friends in the common room and cheered at Quidditch matches.

And Hermione who, every night, crawled into her bed in the darkness of the girls' dormitory and would finally let her perfect masquerade crumble away; Hermione who lay awake at night wishing that every corner of that damned castle did not carry so many memories, precious memories of Sirius.

His ghost was inescapable, unavoidable, and heart-wrenchingly overwhelming.

* * *

A lone figure in a long black cloak strode determinedly from room to room in a darkened house, made even darker by the thick gray clouds that settled low over the city blacking out even the faintest trace of moonlight. He moved quickly and purposefully, striding from a bedroom where he had grabbed a few expensive-looking men's shirts, the man threw open the door of a study. He had only minutes before he'd have to disappear and there was still one crucial item he needed.

Crossing the room, he made quick work of clearing the desk by snatching a number of small, yet intricate objects and a dark brown leather portfolio marked: CONFIDENTIAL. Upon seizing this final item, the man's urgent pace slowed for the first time. He untied the cords that bound the portfolio and opened it, revealing dozens upon dozens of lose sheets of parchment, all covered with their owner's scrawled handwriting. His eyes quickly scanned the first few slips of parchment, a grim determination set upon his face.

A sudden knock on the door of Grimmauld Place was so deafening a contrast against the tomb-like silence within, the walls seemed to shake in their very foundation. The man snapped to attention and, in a heartbeat, resumed his previous haste.

The parchment was unceremoniously shoved back into the folder and each of the captured items was hurriedly stuffed into a faded canvas satchel that the man, moving with remarkable ease around the furniture in the darkness, minimized into a pouch no larger than his palm. Coursing towards the staircase, he leapt three steps at a time as he descended the stairs, shoving the pouch into the pocket of his cloak with one hand as he withdrew his wand with the other.

The visitor outside pounded on the door impatiently. "Sirius! Open the door!"

Sirius paused on the final step, the old wooden planks of the staircase creaked beneath his feet. "James," He mumbled to himself.

"SIRIUS!"

Charging towards the door, Sirius growled low in his throat as he tore open the door, hissing at James immediately, "Will you shut up, James!? It may strike the neighbors as odd if they see a crazed man on the street at midnight shouting at a wall."

James barged into the corridor past Sirius, his cursing cutting off his friend's argument. "Bloody unbelievable! I cannot believe you are actually doing this. You've gone mad, have you?"

Sirius shoved the door shut behind him as he marched back up the corridor. "I have a portkey leaving in two minutes, James."

"Sirius, this is a suicide mission. You are HEAD Auror. I can name fifteen other Aurors who you ought to be sending in your place. Of those fifteen, five are better skilled for such a mission, ten are far more eager for such an assignment, and ALL, every last one of them, are younger than you."

"AND every last one of them has a family at home. I'm the only one without a family… it is only fair that I be the one to go." Sirius answered stoically, sounding every bit the professional he was.

But James wasn't fooled by Sirius' Ministry façade. In fact, he was infuriated by it. "So that's it, then? You're miserable because your personal life hasn't panned out properly, so you feel it's 'only fair' that you martyr yourself for your job?"

Sirius ground his teeth and glared into the darkness of his empty home.

James sighed and went on, "Merlin, Sirius. I'm your best friend. If anyone understands the need for a bit of recklessness, it's me. But for you to volunteer for a mission that is sure to land you on the business end of a Death Eater's wand, well, you're just completely bloody insane. I realize you don't have a family in the sense that you mean it but think of the family you do have. You are like a brother to me and Remus. Think of Harry… you are practically his second father."

Sirius said nothing but squared his shoulders and shifted his eyes to avoid James'.

James shook his head and laughed cynically. "You have no idea what you're doing, do you? I can't imagine that you're aware of what you'll be putting everyone through when you go on this senseless mission but do you even care?" James stared incredulously at his best friend of over twenty years like he was a stranger.

"God, you sound like Remus, you know that?" Sirius finally spoke, though gruffly, and shifted his weight impatiently. "Besides, you should understand better than anyone… you're an auror, for bloody sake! We took an oath to 'protect the Wizarding world from imminent danger'." Sirius mockingly recited the Auror Oath verbatim.

"Of course, I understand that, Sirius. But I also know perfectly well that the Auror oath has nothing to do with this decision."

Sirius released his clenched fists at his sides.

"Admit it," James continued.

Sirius pursed his lips and nodded once. "Very well. I admit it."

"Alright. Let's contact the Ministry to have the mission reassigned so- "

"- I'm still going, James."

"What? You just admitted that you weren't actually going because of that 'auror duty' bollocks."

"And yet, I'm still going, James! Think! You, Remus, Lily, Harry…. Yes, you are all my family but it- it's not enough to stay. Not enough of a reason to put others in danger!"

James just gaped at his friend.

"The portkey will leave without me," Sirius snapped impatiently.

Nodding in resignation, James sighed. "So this is it, then."

Sirius didn't want to leave with bad blood between him and James. Trying to lighten the mood, he forced a smile, "Don't say that, eh. I've gotten myself through worse, mate."

James, however, failed to find the humor in the situation. "There is nothing heroic about choosing danger when you have nothing to lose. Forgive me for sounding like Remus but, as he isn't here to say it himself, it falls on me to be the sensible one."

The corner of Sirius' mouth twitched upward. "You don't sound like Remus. You sound like – "

"-Hermione?" James smirked despite himself.

"Right… well," Sirius glanced around the corridor a bit awkwardly. "Um, keep an eye on the place here, would you? I don't trust Kreacher to do much while I'm gone aside from prostrating in front of my mother's portrait."

James grinned sadly and clasped Sirius' shoulder for a brief moment. "Take care of yourself, Padfoot."

Sirius looked directly at James and nodded before turning toward the door. But before he could depart James spoke again, Sirius paused in the doorway, his hand resting on the doorknob.

"I'll tell Harry you'll see him at graduation. So you'd best be there to congratulate him."

Understanding what James was implying, Sirius offered a small smile. "Wouldn't miss it for the world."

* * *

_Hermione stared up into Sirius' weary face. Her yearning was clearly exposed. He could read in her eyes the depths of her longing._

"_Sirius…" _

_As the whisper escaped her lips, Sirius lost all rational thought. He lost himself._

_He reached for her blindly and crushed his lips to hers. His every sense was afire as he secured her firmly against his body._

_He was overwhelmed; the scent, the taste, the feel of her… there was no thought in his mind of who they were or who they had been. The overpowering emotion forced every last thought from his mind overruling his consciousness._

_Like he never had before, he disappeared into her. Touching her hair, cupping her face, drinking her in, over and over again._

_Hermione kissed him back hungrily. She touched her hands to his chest. She clung to him, clutching the front of his shirt in tight fists. Her petit frame trembled against his body. _

Sirius jolted awake with a start. He twisted his head swiftly to each side, his adept canine eyes piercing the darkness. It took him a moment to recognize his surroundings before realizing, with a pang of anguish, that it had been a dream. Again. After nearly five weeks in these bleak and isolated mountains, he was still unable to escape the torment that Hermione Granger had inflicted upon him for twenty-two years.

He pushed against the drought-hardened earth upon which he'd made his bed and raised into a sitting position. His muscles screamed in agony at the movement. Part of him wished to go back to sleep in hopes that Hermione would again appear to him, as she had each night of the five weeks he had been on look out. But the greater part of him wished he would never again sleep and fall victim to his unconscious mind.

The dull roar in his stomach alerted him to his hunger. It had been over a day since he'd last eaten, he realized. Reaching into his cloak for his wand, he rose to his feet, feeling every ache one might acquire after over a month of sleeping on a stone surface. Considering what he might find for food, he stretched broadly.

A rustling to his left caused Sirius to freeze in perfect stillness, ears poised to hear any approaching danger. Without a sound, he transformed into his animagus form and crouched low. If someone were to come upon him, he could not risk being recognized.

The shrub shook wildly as its inhabitant moved more closely to the small clearing in which Sirius had built his sparse camp. From the corner of his eye, he saw something dart from the shrub beside him and cross the clearing in haste before disappearing into a crack in the boulders that formed the base of the mountain.

A wildcat. Sirius, in his Padfoot form, exhaled heavily in relief.

All these weeks in the mountains in Northern Italy and the stressful conditions of the stake-out mission had, seemingly, frayed his nerves a bit.

When he first learned that his sworn enemy from back at Hogwarts, Damien McNair, had begun rallying followers in Central Europe, he was eager to see justice served once and for all with the life-long death eater. Just before departing on the mission, however, the Ministry learned the gravity of McNair's actions and the devastation that would surely ensue if this man was not stopped.

And after arriving in Italy and making camp near McNair's family estate in Bologna, Sirius found, to his revulsion, that McNair had not just recruited a few Death Eaters… he had begun the makings of an army of Voldemort followers and was training them as well. More horrific still was that they were not conducting this training behind the walls of safe or private facility.

No, Damien McNair was sending the fresh Death Eaters to practice their unforgivable curses on the innocent locals of the Northern Italian city.

Sirius had been waiting with the patience of a child, until he had a clear move into the compound to capture McNair. He'd been able to cast protective charms around most of the homes in the area but until he could get to McNair himself, there was not much he could do without alerting McNair to the fact that the Ministry had found them out.

Padfoot glanced down the mountainside into the valley where McNair's estate was located. Lights were visible within and shadows could be seen moving about inside. Sirius decided he would find dinner for himself before descending into the valley to conduct his nightly perimeter check of the estate.

Sauntering into the nearby brush, he lifted his nose and sniffed the night air. Strangely, he was sure he smelled fresh meat … rabbit, perhaps. His hunger was getting the best of him. It wasn't wise to wait such long stretches of time between meals, he knew, but his devotion to his missions was near obsession and he always found it next to impossible to break for food.

With increased swiftness over the rocky terrain as a canine, Sirius moved invisibly through the bushes in the dark, following the scent of his next meal.

Instantly, a voice stopped him dead in his tracks, at once recognizing the speaker, Sirius' blood coursed ice cold through his body.

"Casualties are part of this fight, De Luca." McNair's remorseless voice was unmistakable as he spoke to a younger man in dark robes. Padfoot sank low to the ground, he was only feet away from the two men and had only the moonless night to thank for not being seen.

The younger man spoke, his voice cracking with emotion that he tried with great difficulty to restrain. "Yes, sir, I know but –"

The hoarse, callous voice of McNair interrupted, "You knew this when you came to me asking to become one of us, did you not?"

A sob escaped the young man's throat. "I did, sir. But my - "

"We have all made our sacrifices, De Luca. This won't be your last."

"No! No, I can't… I can't… my brother..." The young man collapsed to his knees and laid his hands and forehead on the mound before him.

"Your brother was weak, De Luca!" McNair hissed. "He will not be missed among our ranks."

De Luca broke down into body wrenching sobs, clutching what Sirius could now see was not a mound of earth… but the lifeless body of this young man's brother, a boy no more than eighteen years old.

"Then why didn't you just let him go!?" De Luca cried out to the man towering over him, his voice raw. "He didn't have to die!"

"Oh, but I am not the one who killed him," McNair answered calculatingly. "I believe it was you who sent the curse. Was it not?"

De Luca's face turned to stone in fury. "You made me do it! You said he'd been trained in the proper shielding spells! I would never use an unforgiveable curse against my own brother!!"

"But you did, didn't you?" McNair replied impassively. "Any wizard who would kill his own brother will undoubtedly be of great use to the Dark Lord."

"I will NEVER serve your Dark Lord and I will never serve you!" He lunged at McNair who, with a wave of his wand, sent De Luca's body crashing into the side of the mountain. The young man crumpled the ground, groaning as he attempted to push himself back up and continue fighting.

From his nearby position, Padfoot rocked forward on his front paws. He shook as he fought against himself. His desire to attack was barely curbed by his sense that he should not yet reveal himself. If he made himself known and did not overpower McNair, he would be derailing the months of strategic planning that had been conducted prior to this mission.

He reluctantly remained still as he watched McNair approach DeLuca slowly, taunting him all the way. "My, my… I hope I didn't make a mistake and choose the wrong brother. What a terribly ironic tragedy that would be."

De Luca pushed himself up, leaning heavily against the wall in pain. He attempted to lift his wand against the older man but it was instantly expelled from his hand by McNair who pointed his own wand at the young man's heart.

"What a shame," McNair said without the slightest trace of sympathy. "First, your naiveté killed your own brother, and now your foolishness will kill you. I'll be sure to explain this to your parents when they are forced to mourn the loss of both their children. That is, if they live that long."

De Luca, his breathing ragged, mustered the final remnants of his strength, lifted his head and spat in McNair's face.

McNair seethed. He furiously wiped the spit off of his face and, gripping his wand more tightly, retrained it on DeLuca's chest.

He narrowed his eyes maliciously and uttered, "Avada Ke-"

He was suddenly thrown sideways when a large, black figure collided into him. His head smacked against the hard floor as he fell.

Padfoot leapt up again and raced over to DeLuca, transforming back into his human form mid-leap. "Run." Sirius commanded him.

"Who- who are you?" De Luca flinched away in fear as Sirius approached him.

"Just get out of here. Take your brother's body and run as far away as you can."

De Luca nodded, his eyes wide with terror, and lurched forward, weak and sick with agony. He grasped for his wand, lifted his brother's body and, with another horrified glance toward Sirius, apparated them both away.

"Do my eyes deceive me?" The cruel voice came from behind Sirius. Sirius whirled around to see McNair limping toward him, wand held high. "Why, Sirius Black. It has been years."

Though weakened from lack of food, Sirius rose to his full height and released a feral growl. Pure hatred boiled from deep within him, aimed at the man whom he would always blame for his lifelong heartache. It was McNair who kept Sirius from Hermione's side in that battle at Hogwarts so long ago and it was McNair whom Sirius would always believe responsible for the greatest loss he had ever known.

Sirius' ears pricked, ready for the attack and a grim smile began to spread across his face. As he stared into the end of McNair's wand, a terrifyingly gratified laugh rose in Sirius' throat, halting McNair's advance.

"What are you laughing at?" McNair hissed angrily.

At this, Sirius merely shook his head coolly. "I was thinking about how long I've been waiting for this moment and… that I am going to kill you."

Damien McNair's haughty repose waivered upon seeing the determination of his opponent. "If you were going to kill me," He glanced around anxiously, "you would have by now."

"You're right, McNair." Sirius nodded, almost casually. "But I assume that to kill you, I will have to first rid myself of the rest of your friends?" He flicked his wand in a tight circle in the air. "Homenum Revelio."

At once, nearly a dozen of McNair's death eaters were revealed, their Disillusionment charms cast off, forming a defensive wall around Sirius and McNair. Among them, a distraught-looking DeLuca, pointing a trembling wand at Sirius.

"I ask only one small, gracious favor of you all," Sirius spoke to the group, not taking his eyes off McNair. "Don't kill me until after I've killed him."

The words were barely out of his mouth before the curses began to fly.

From miles away, unknowing citizens stopped and gazed in amazement at the beautiful and mysterious sparks soaring high into the night sky.

* * *

_**Two Months Later.**_

Harry's eyes traced over the final lines of the letter Hedwig had just delivered to him from his parents. From the sofa beside him, Ginny and Ron waited anxiously for him to report any news.

As he absorbed the last line of the message, he paled.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Harry clenched the parchment in his fist before handing it roughly to Ron who reached out for it eagerly.

"Still no word from Sirius," Ron said solemnly while hastily scanning the missive. Coming to the end of the letter, he swallowed thickly.

"It's been months now!" Ginny cried. Catching herself suddenly, she glanced around the Gryffindor common room and made sure they were alone. They were. Nonetheless, she leaned forward and spoke more discreetly, "Surely the Ministry has maintained some sort of communication. How can it be that no one has been in touch with him, Harry?"

Harry shook his head vaguely, his eyes distant. "Dad says Sirius cut off all contact for security purposes… no one at the Ministry has heard from him in weeks."

"The Ministry can trace magic use though," Ron pointed out, feeling rather helpless. "If he uses any really powerful spells, I'm sure they will be able to locate him."

Ginny perched on the arm of Harry's chair, taking his hand to comfort him. "Sirius is the best auror in the Ministry. I'm sure he's fine." But not even Ginny could find solace in her words.

Harry barely mustered a small smile of gratitude for her attempt at reassurance. "I just wish he'd contact us… just so we'd know he was alright." Turning his attention across the room, Harry appraised Hermione, who appeared to be deeply engrossed in a book that she held propped on her knees. She'd been so still for so long he'd forgotten she was even in the room.

Harry passed a significant look from Ron and then to Ginny, all sharing a silent thought. There was still one person he hadn't asked.

"Hermione?"

She blinked once and continued reading without acknowledging him.

"Hermione, have you heard from Sirius at all?"

Again, nothing.

"Hermione?!" He demanded in disbelief.

She glanced up at Harry with surprise, as though she'd forgotten her friends were there. "Yes, Harry?"

Harry gaped at her incredulously for a moment before he could speak. "Has Sirius contacted you at all? He has still not returned from the Ministry mission."

Hermione looked back at Harry blankly.

"I told you about this six weeks ago," He reminded her impatiently. "Well, he isn't back yet Hermione. No one has spoken to him nor received any communication from him."

Hermione licked her lips nervously.

"He's stopped responding to messages… and as he was the only person with full access to the file, no one knows where exactly he might be," Harry continued.

He had Hermione's full attention now but he couldn't stop. Her eyes were shining as she looked intently at him, drinking in his words. Her lips parted as her mouth opened in shock.

It was almost cathartic for Harry now as he found he was finally drawing a real reaction out of her, anything he could do to wake her up to what was happening.

He pushed on, forcing himself to speak aloud the unbearable message from home. "The Ministry is about to launch a full scale search, only, as far as they're concerned it is a… 'recovery mission'… because they don't believe there's any chance he's still alive."

For the briefest of seconds Hermione's resolute stoicism faltered, her brow creased in worry as she bore her eyes into Harry's begging for him to reveal this was false, a sick joke. She felt her body begin to go limp, her hands went slack. The large book she held slipped from her grasp, nearly crashing to the floor before she clumsily caught it again.

She forced her eyes shut and took in a deep breath. Begging herself to control the trembling shock that had overtaken her body, she slowly looked back up at Harry, who, at once could plainly see that she was retreating behind her emotionless wall once more.

"I'm… um… I'm afraid I can't shed any light onto this situation for you, Harry." Her voice wavered and hinted at the betrayal in her words. Her eyes were all avoidance and agony.

Harry shook his head disbelievingly. "Onto this situation?" He said angrily, his voice seeming much louder in the vast common room. "This situation!? I'm not studying for a Potions exam, Hermione, I'm afraid my godfather could be dead!"

Hermione fixed her gaze on a page in her book though she was clearly not reading a word in front of her. "I am sure you've no reason to worry, Harry," She said robotically.

Harry was on his feet now. "All you had to say was that you hadn't heard from him or shown just a little damned concern. That is all I asked." He shook his head as he stared accusingly at the girl he used to be able to talk to about anything. "Merlin, Hermione, how can you be so cold?"

Hermione stiffened at his words. "Well," she sniffed, "I'm sorry I can't be more help."

With that, she quickly stuffed her books into her satchel and heaved the bag's strap onto her shoulder.

She turned to exit the common room but Harry clasped her elbow, holding her back. "Hermione, will you just stop running for a moment and speak to me!?" His eyes plead with her. But she couldn't… she wouldn't be able to speak about Sirius without Harry seeing… without them all knowing all the feelings she'd tried to bury deep within.

"I'm sorry, Harry." She fixed her eyes on the floor in front of her, refusing to allow her gaze to meet her friends' eyes. As she rapidly departed, a stunned Harry, Ron, and Ginny were left in her wake.

No sooner than the portrait had swung shut behind her, Hermione crumpled to the floor, gasping for breath as tortured sobs racked her fragile body. Her lungs seemed to refuse the air she drew in with great gasps.

The echo of footsteps approaching caught her attention.

Hermione pushed herself up and, bracing herself along the corridor wall, just barely rounded the corner before she sank once more to the ground and rocked herself back and forth as she lamented the loss of a love she would never be whole without.

"Hermione…"

She gasped and looked up to find Harry staring down at her, perplexed and concerned.

"Harry, please, just go. Please," she implored him. Harry's pity was more than she could handle at that moment. "Please go away…"

"No, I won't," he said with finality. "I am not going to pretend anymore that there is nothing wrong. I have given you all the space you've asked for for months and I haven't questioned you, not once. But I will no longer stand by and do nothing while my best friend pulls away from everyone who cares about her. Not this time."

Hermione was caught between the overwhelming devastation of Sirius' loss and the unexpected comfort of Harry's determined loyalty… there was so much she wanted to tell him and so much she couldn't say. She shook her head, "Harry… I– "

But Harry was determined to find out why she had been so tormented all these months.

"Hermione, I know there was something between you and Sirius during your time in the past… I know that you had… feelings for him and I realize that it can't possibly be an easy thing for you to discuss-"

"No," Hermione broke in suddenly. "I'm sorry, Harry, but I just can't." Stifling another sob, she stumbled to her feet and shakily ran a familiar path, along the corridor, down and down and down the stairs, until she burst from the main doors of the castle into the cool spring air.

And she didn't stop.

She ran faster still into the darkness; past the Great Lake where the heavy mist dampened her skin, past the Quidditch pitch which was almost completely obscured in the moonless night, until she finally stopped… at the foot of the imposing wall of colossal trees marking the boundary of the Forbidden Forest. She stopped and she panted, falling to her knees, clutching her chest for breath.

She turned her face up to the sky and wished with every last fiber of her being that she could see Sirius once more… see that he was alive… happy and healthy.

"Lumos." Harry's voice was heard only seconds before his wand shone brightly in the vast open space. He trudged towards Hermione through the marshy grass along the lake shore.

Harry was right... She couldn't run any longer.

Hermione fell into his arms, her face pressed into his chest, a place where she had once wished so badly to be. Now, however, it was solely the comfort of friendship she yearned for from Harry... The feelings she once held for him were a distant memory in a past that no longer existed.

Now, it was her desire for Sirius that caused her angst and her friend, Harry, who was there to steady her.

The familiar scene sparked something in Hermione's memory and, despite herself, she laughed.

Harry, more confused than ever, pulled his head back and craned his neck to peer down at her. "Are you... laughing?"

She sniffed and wiped at her eyes, nodding sheepishly. "I just remembered a time when your mum comforted me just like this, over there..." Her eyes pinpointed the spot beside the lake where Lily had rocked her softly and calmed her. "What I ever would have done without the Potters is beyond me."

Harry smiled gently. "Well, we Potters are a noble breed, I suppose." Hermione smiled slightly at that but her eyes were still distant. His voice softened, "Hermione, what is it you're trying to run away from?"

She sighed. "I hardly know. I feel like I'll go mad if I sit still."

"Is it because of him, because of Sirius?" Harry tentatively broached the subject, hoping she wouldn't close herself off again.

She squeezed him more tightly and nodded, her face buried in his shoulder now. Flames of embarrassment and shame burned beneath her skin. "I'm so sorry, Harry."

"Sorry?! Hermione, why, in Merlin's name, would you be sorry?"

"Because I know how much he means to you and I am afraid that he's gone away because of me... Because he never wanted to see me again and I just had to go force my way back into his life instead of leaving him alone as he had wished!"

"Hermione, that's ridic-"

"If I had just done what he had asked and left him alone, you would not have to wonder whether or not your godfather was alive! I am so sorry for having been so selfish, Harry... Can I even begin to apologize for what I've done...?"

Harry pushed Hermione back by her shoulders and examined her face and all of its complexities. "Why do you keep apologizing? You know Sirius well enough to understand how he operates. A dangerous mission to him is like Christmas morning for a child. He lives for it and has always been that way. Surely you must know that?"

"I do."

"We are all worried," Harry said honestly. "But I'm not giving up yet and neither should you."

"I had just hoped that by being in the past, I could have changed the future for the better... And if Sirius is gone... Then, I'm not sure how much I accomplished."

"What was it like, Hermione? What was our time like before things changed? If you feel it needed changing then I am certain it was for the best."

Her breath caught in her throat. "I don't know if I can tell you that, Harry..."

"No more secrets, Hermione, please?"

She looked into Harry's eyes, the eyes that were mirror images of his mother's, and knew she couldn't lie to him.

A long steadying breath prepared her to explain the world that she had once known.

"In our time, the night Voldemort came to Godric's Hollow… "

As the heartrending tale unfolded, Harry was anchored to Hermione's every word… both horrified and captivated.

"…and that is when I was sent back in time. We were staying at Grimmauld Place since you had inherited it from - "

"From Sirius… after he died…"

"Yes," Hermione whispered, a stray tear escaping her eye as she relived each memory through Harry's tortured reaction.

Harry was staggered. He stepped away from Hermione while he tried to imagine the unfathomable tragedy his life may have been.

"So… there is a chance that I may have never known my parents? Sirius would have spent twelve years in Azkaban? And Peter Pettigrew, who gave his life to save mine, was a traitor?"

"Yes."

"Then how can you question whether or not you did the right thing, Hermione?"

"Because I couldn't save him, Harry! I couldn't save him too!" She cried, growing more and more frustrated that she was so completely helpless.

"It was not your fault that - " Harry froze mid-sentence. He focused on something in the distance and slowly withdrew his wand.

"Harry, what…? She turned and saw a silvery jet of light moving rapidly towards them. Before she could finish her question, the silver figure slowed to a full stop before them.

It instantly transformed into a gleaming, silver stag, and it spoke, James' voice emanating from the patronus.

"Hello Son. We've just arrived at St. Mungo's, Tonk's has gone into labor. We've asked permission for you to come to the hospital straight away. Hermione, Ron, and Ginny, as well. See you soon!"

The stag inclined its head regally and turned, sprinting back across the darkness.

The two friends were overwhelmed. The emotions still running high from their conversation now mixed with the thrilling news from home.

Harry's eyes were alight with excitement. "Tonk's is going to have the baby! Come on, let's go tell Ron and Ginny! Oh… we should let my parents know we've gotten the message." He was rambling in his rush to get back to the castle.

"I'll do it." Hermione said, smiling at Harry's evident happiness for the Lupin's. She raised her wand and waved it overhead. "Expecto Patronum!"

The smile evaporated from Hermione's face though, and the breath caught in Harry's throat, when the burst of metallic light was sent forth from her wand and began to take shape. In midair, the patronus' silvery light expanded into the form of an unmistakable large, scruffy dog.

It looked directly at Hermione before leaping forward into the darkness and out of sight.

She and Harry looked at each other, mouths open in astonishment. And Harry finally knew the truth. She loved Sirius. She was in love with Sirius.

* * *

In a dim corridor of St. Mungo's Hospital, Lily and James Potter sat huddled together. Lily rested her head against her husband's shoulder, a faint smile played across her lips, full of excitement for the Lupins.

James' soft snores calmed her and her own eyelids began to droop.

"James," a hoarse whisper began to wake the sleeping couple. "Lily."

James reached up and straightened his glasses on his nose and opened his eyes to a blurry figure in front of him. "Sirius…? Is that…?"

Suddenly, the corridor was brilliantly illuminated, announcing the arrival of a patronus. James' eyes blinked rapidly against the light. He tried to focus on the face in front of him, in disbelief, "Sirius?!" He and Lily both leapt to their feet.

James looked into the face of his best friend, thinking he must still be asleep. "Padfoot," he shook his head in wonder. There were no other words, "Padfoot, old friend. You're back."

The two friends embraced. And Lily, shedding tears of pure joy, kissed Sirius on the cheek and hugged him tightly.

But none of them moved a muscle when the patronus that stopped before them was not Harry's stag, as expected, but a familiar large dog.

James looked to Sirius. "It's Padfoot?"

Sirius shrugged, equally as puzzled.

"Wait… listen," Lily held up her hand to silence him and leaned in to hear the message from the canine patronus.

Hermione's steady voice addressed them, "We will floo from Hogwarts straight away. Send our best to Remus and Tonks. See you shortly."

James watched the Patronus disappear before him, mystified. He looked to Sirius and then to Lily, "But it _was_ Padfoot… wasn't it?"

Lily's sober face nodded at him, knowingly.

"But how?" James asked.

They both turned to Sirius whose deep charcoal eyes were wide and fixed upon the place where Hermione's voice was heard coming from his own Patronus. His heart was racing beneath the still waters of his exterior.

He looked up at James and Lily, realization dawning on his face. It wasn't too late.

* * *

**Thank you all so much for reading! **

**If you'd like to share your thoughts, feelings, suggestions, curses, comments, etc... please feel free to leave me whatever words you would like to share. **

**Oh, and just because I'm curious, let me know what you thought of the Half-Blood Prince movie!! And, if you were to recast any of the roles, which would it be and which actor would you choose to play the role instead?**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter nor any of JK Rowling's wonderful characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **Again, I must thank my readers, each of you amazing and loyal beyond reason. I haven't abandoned you nor have I abandoned this story. I love these characters far too much to give them up just yet.

Thank you for your patience and thank you even more for your impatience which lights the fire of motivation to get back to writing.

Thank you to my beta and friend, Countess of Abe, for sticking with me and for taking time out of her insanely busy schedule to read my drafts over and over again.

**Chapter Twenty-Three.**

* * *

_None of them moved a muscle when the patronus that stopped before them was not Harry's stag but a familiar large dog. _

_James looked to Sirius. "It's Padfoot?"_

_Sirius shrugged, equally as puzzled._

_Hermione's steady voice addressed them from the canine patronus, "We will floo from Hogwarts straight away. Send our best to Remus and Tonks. See you shortly."_

_James watched the Patronus disappear before him, mystified. He looked to Sirius and then to Lily, "But it was Padfoot… wasn't it?"_

_Lily's sober face nodded at him, knowingly. _

"_But how?" James asked._

_They both turned to Sirius whose deep charcoal eyes were wide and fixed upon the place where Hermione's voice was heard coming from his own Patronus. His heart was racing beneath the still waters of his exterior._

_He looked up at James and Lily, realization dawning on his face. It wasn't too late._

* * *

Hermione heard nothing. Only the sound of her heart pounding in her ears.

Ecstatic faces and beaming smiles were all she noticed of the joyful reunion before her.

Harry ran to his godfather, greeting him with a solid embrace. Ginny and Ron rushed forward out of the floo and into the corridor. All present were overjoyed to see him alive and well.

Hermione, though, stood fast in the hearth, unable to move, unable to comprehend anything other than the sight of the man before her.

She heard only the constant thump of her pulse and saw only Sirius Black. Alive.

Sirius' twinkling eyes lifted, stopping dead once they crossed paths with Hermione's disbelieving gaze. She swallowed thickly. Her knees betrayed her by weakening under his scrutiny and she placed a hand on the mantle to steady herself.

His clothes, she noticed, were tattered. The evidence of sleeplessness was worn like a mask, marring his perennially handsome face… but then, he would always be beautiful to Hermione.

The coupled beats of her heart drummed a steadying rhythm throughout her body, quickening when Sirius rose to his feet, his eyes still aimed for hers.

He was smiling... Tentatively though it was. But it warmed her throughout nonetheless. His face bore the very same expression he'd had, in a time long since passed, when he had come to her dormitory at Hogwarts, just in time to catch her before she'd gone.

The faces of their friends around them fell away.

The two of them stood now a corridor's width apart. Impulse told Hermione to bolt forward into his arms, to wrap herself within his embrace, and to make up for every day that they had missed together.

But her brain, her most powerful asset and most self-destructive weapon, forbade her to reach out for him. The part of her that recalled the pain, even now when looking upon his achingly perfect face, refused to let go.

It would take only seconds to disobey her conscience. Only three strides stood between protecting her heart and complete, if only fleeting, bliss.

But she remained rooted to the floor. The distance between them was filled only by the heat conducted from their stares which filled the space around them.

The suffocating silence in the corridor was broken by the sound of a door swinging open. A collective breath was held as Remus' face emerged, weary yet shining with a beam of a smile that allowed all the world to see his elation.

Hermione and Sirius broke their gaze for the first time.

"Moony?" James asked eagerly.

"I have a son," Remus announced, his voice full of pride. "Dominic Peter Lupin."

"A boy! I knew it!" James whooped with glee. He hugged Remus tightly.

Lily wiped a stray tear from her cheek. "Dominic Peter... it's lovely."

"A perfect tribute to Wormtail," said James.

Sirius stepped forward and embraced his friend, clapping him heartily on the back. "Congratulations, Moony."

Sirius stepped back, away from the group as then the rush of questions bombarded Remus from every side.

"How is Tonks?"

"Can we see him?"

"Who does he look like?"

"Is he a werewolf? Or a metamorphmagus?"

Before he could begin to field all of the eager questions, they were quieted for him. A petite woman with brilliant lavender hair and a smile equally as bright walked out into the corridor carrying a tiny bundle in her arms.

"Tonks!"

Remus turned at Harry's shout to see his wife standing in the hallway barefoot in her hospital gown.

"Nymphadora?" He looked at her incredulously. "What are you doing out of bed?"

"You didn't think I was going to let you receive all the praise when I'm the one that did all the work, did you?" She laughed.

Baby Dominic was passed from friend to friend, each marveling at the beautiful little boy and debating which of his parent's features he shared.

"He definitely has Remus' eyes," Ginny decided.

"His nose looks like Tonks', I think… or at least the way her nose looks today," Ron said.

James held Dominic and examined him closely. "What do you think, Padfoot? The kid's got Moony's fur coat, eh?"

The friends erupted in joyful laughter. James handed the baby to Hermione next.

"Oh… umm," she looked petrified for a moment while she adjusted her arms to carefully cradle the baby. "Is this right, Tonks?"

"You're doing just fine, Hermione," she reassured.

"I've never held a baby before," she explained. "He's really…" Before she could tell Remus and Tonks how handsome their son was, Sirius completed her sentence.

"…beautiful."

Her eyes met Sirius'. Although they were surrounded by friends, at once, the moment felt intimate and private. His eyes bore into hers, emotions gleaming in the gray depths within, a small contemplative smile on his face.

Hermione was drawn abruptly from her daze. "Yes, exactly." She turned to Remus and thrust the baby back into his father's arms. "He is beautiful, Remus. Excuse me, everyone."

Moving as quickly as she could without breaking into a full run, she pushed open a door at the end of the corridor, paying little attention to where she was going. A breath of night chilled London air coursed over her body and she noticed she was outside. She shivered and wrapped her arms tightly around herself.

Her eyes took time adjusting to the dark. The small courtyard came into view around her. Enclosed on all sides by the walls of the hospital, the tiny garden was an oasis for Hermione. She breathed deeply, letting the cool fresh air fill her lungs. With each shaky exhale, her body released a fraction of the exhaustion from the feverish struggle within.

There wasn't any preparation for seeing Sirius at the hospital. There wasn't any way to prepare for the flood of emotions at seeing him alive.

"Hermione."

And there was no way to keep her entire body from trembling when she heard his voice behind her now.

She took a step away from him. Looking at him would be too much.

"It's brilliant isn't it?" He said, encouraging a response. "Remus being a father?"

Placing her palm flat on her chest, Hermione willed her breathing to steady before answering. "Yes, it's wonderful."

She sensed him moving toward her.

"You… you're doing well?" He asked.

"I am."

"I haven't- I… I've only just returned so I haven't heard so… it… I mean, I am glad to see that you're doing well."

The stilted conversation hung stagnant in the air around them, like the darkness, shrouding their true feelings.

Hermione turned to face him and they both spoke at once, breaking the silence in unison.

"If you're wo-"

"I don't know how-"

Sirius nodded his head toward her. "Please, go on."

She swallowed thickly. "I was going to say that… if you're worried that I am going to continue to be a nuisance or try discussing… us… you needn't."

Sirius stared at her blankly. "I needn't….?"

"You needn't worry. I don't intend to pursue any such unpleasantries with you."

He continued to watch her silently. It was unnerving to her.

"That is all I was going to say…" Looking into his questioning eyes, she was losing her nerve.

"Unpleasantries?" He asked.

She moved back a step. "I… I know that I behaved horribly when we last we spoke. You asked me to leave you alone…"

"Hermione," He took a step towards her. "I know I said that… but you must know that I never meant – I never wanted you to go."

"Yes, you did." Hearing his denial, the anger began returning to her. The anger she felt that night, the night he kissed her moments before accusing her of ruining his life.

"I thought I was doing the right thing," he admitted.

"The right thing for whom exactly?" She shot back.

"For you."

"That's a lie. I stood before you and told you that I believed you were the person I was meant to be with and you could not afford me the courtesy of looking me in the eye."

He shrugged defensively. "I was wrong."

"You were." She softened. "But so was I. I had no place disrupting your life after so many years."

Sirius was taken aback. "I _am_ sorry for what I said. I was angry and… frustrated, I suppose, but my intention was not to hu-"

"Please don't finish that sentence," she begged.

The words froze in his throat. He furrowed his brow.

"If you are about to say that you didn't intend to hurt me, then I must ask you to stop. Please, don't lie to me."

"Hurting you was not what I wanted to do."

"But just the same, you did."

Sirius yanked a hand through his hair in frustration. "I admit, I said some terrible things that you did not deserve. But you must understand that the circumstances of this... of us... they're unusual and... I spent so many years..." He trailed off.

Hermione watched him, her lips pursed in a firm line.

"What is it you are you trying to say, Sirius?" She finally asked, tired of the extended silences that wore on her resolve.

He raised his head slowly, looking every bit the aristocrat he was, despite his tattered cloak and disheveled appearance.

"Do you know how often I thought of you while I was away?"

Hermione recoiled. That was not the response she had expected him to give. "No."

Sirius smiled thoughtfully. "All the time," He answered simply. "You were the reason I knew I had to return. Hermione, I need you to know that the manner in which I have behaved towards you is in no way a reflection of my feelings. I was angry and cruel... And I'm sorry."

"Thank you for your apology."

The two just stared at one another; his regret, forcing a wedge between them. Her unwillingness to give in to this man, whose power over her would only break her over and over again, would allow the wedge to keep them apart.

"We should get back," she said, twisting her hands in front of her.

"Hermione, I thought about you all the time… "

"While you were on your mission, I know," she said.

Sirius shook his head. "No. _All_ the time. All of the years that I had to go on without you… every moment of every day, you were never gone from my thoughts!"

Hermione told herself again to steady her voice. "Why are you telling me this now? Why now and not three months ago or six months ago for that matter?"

"Because I had spent years living with your ghost and when you, the real you, awoke in the hospital, showed up on my doorstep, it was all I could do to keep from going mad!"

"I lost something too, Sirius! Maybe I haven't suffered as long as you have but I have suffered! You turned me away, treated me like a petulant child!"

"I've apologized for that. What's done is done. I can't change it now, Hermione!"

"Then I suppose it's something we'll both have to live to accept," She said sadly, as she turned to leave.

Sirius grabbed her shoulders and spun her around to face him.

"Hermione, I know that there is a part of you that doesn't want to walk away."

"I can't do this…" She tried to pull away.

"I saw your patronus!" He stopped her.

She froze. "You did?"

"Yes." A smile cracked his weary face despite himself.

"Then you know." Hermione looked up at him, scrutinizing every detail of his expression as the tears she'd been fighting welled in her eyes. "You already know."

"I know that there is still something there. I know that neither of us will ever be as happy with another as we would be together."

"That may be true, Sirius, but I also know that I am never going to let you break my heart again."

Sirius pleaded with her. "I don't know how I can respond to that other than to say, I won't. Can't it be that simple?" He smiled hopefully.

"If only it could be."

"Who's to say it isn't?" Sirius' eyes caught the light and gleamed with anticipatory passion and bent his head down, his lips seeking hers.

"No," protested Hermione, feeling the warmth of his breath mingling with hers. His face was so close and his scent intoxicating. Her knees were growing weak beneath her and she was grateful for the strength of his hold on her shoulders. "This can't be fixed with a kiss, Sirius."

With that, she turned away from him, reaching the door in a few brisk strides, leaving Sirius standing alone, the warmth of her breath still felt upon his face.

Pulling the door open, Hermione retreated inside the hospital. Eventually, she told herself, eventually it would all fade. The memories would fade and she would move on, live a normal life without Sirius Black haunting her every thought. She could hope.

* * *

_**One Month Later**_

"Though we do not know what your respective destinies hold, there is no doubt that you each possess the ability to achieve greatness."

Dumbledore's voice was carried across the grounds of Hogwarts by the warm summer breeze. The day couldn't have been more picturesque. The amber sun began its slow decent over the Great Lake and the excitement of family and friends could be felt amongst all of the new graduates as they listened to the Headmaster's address.

"Greatness can mean many things; heroism in our war that has yet to be won, triumph over the evils that impede our progress, and leading the Wizarding World into a time of peace. Whatever path you choose, know that _time_ is your only true enemy."

Sirius, who until then had been instinctively scanning the edge of the Forbidden Forest, turned his full attention to Dumbledore.

"You may have the ability to achieve greatness but doing so before the sand in the hourglass runs out, _that_, my friends, is the real challenge."

Hermione chewed contemplatively on her lower lip as she considered the truth in this statement.

"I wish each of you the very best in your futures and know that you will always have a home here at Hogwarts."

Applause and cheers roared throughout the audience as the Headmaster descended the stage.

Sitting across the grounds from one another, Hermione and Sirius' thoughts each turned to the other, both sharing the very same thought, echoing the wizened Headmaster's advice: Time was their only enemy.

"Oi, Sirius! Are you awake, old man?" James laughed over the lively chatter of the crowd.

Sirius looked up at him and grimaced at the 'old man' remark.

James jerked his head in the direction of the graduates who were being mobbed by enthusiastic family members. "Shall we go collect Harry before heading back to Molly's?"

Hermione pushed her way through the crowd searching for Harry, her parents excitedly chatting to her as they hastened to keep up in her wake.

Finally she spotted Harry just ahead. Turning to her parents, she urged them forward and they approached the group.

"Mum, Dad, of course you remember…," she gestured to Harry but, when she looked up, her eyes fell upon Sirius' instead. She hadn't expected him to be there. Breathlessly, his name fell from her lips, "Sirius."

Her parents looked at one another in confusion and then to Harry.

"I thought Sirius was Harry's godfather, isn't that right?" Said Mrs. Granger to her unhearing daughter.

"Er," Harry laughed awkwardly from beside Sirius. "Yes, that's right. Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Granger. It's a pleasure to see you both again." He shook both their hands while eyeing Hermione suspiciously.

Hermione was still. She examined Sirius' gray eyes, almost silver in the late afternoon light, his solemn face, his newly shorn hair…

The gathering of friends and family had fallen uncomfortably quiet around them.

Clearing his throat, Harry nudged Hermione with his elbow. "Hermione, have your parent's been introduced to everyone?"

She whirled her head around to look at Harry, surprised, as though she had forgotten where she was. "Oh… right. Mum, Dad, um… this is Harry's godfather." She stepped back, allowing them to greet one another.

Sirius's eyes flew from Hermione to her parents. He smiled with aristocratic poise and reached his hand out politely, "Sirius Black. It's a pleasure to finally meet you both."

Her parents smiled warmly at the man, curious, though, at their daughter's odd reaction to him.

Sirius looked back to the girl before him. "Congratulations, Hermione."

"Thank you."

Every time their eyes locked it was as though the rest of world was falling away. Hermione was in terrible danger of losing her composure and herself.

"I thought you weren't going to make it today, Sirius," Harry said, breaking the silence. "Dad said you had to work."

"I do. I am on duty now actually. We decided we needed to reinforce security around the perimeter of the grounds."

"We can never be too careful," Remus added.

"Merlin, Padfoot. I never thought I'd see the day when you and Remus saw eye to eye on taking precautions," James laughed.

"We should begin heading back home," Ron spoke up. "Mum'll be devastated if we don't allow her to force feed and smother us all soon."

Crossing through the group, Lily smiled warmly at the Grangers and approached them with a welcoming hug. "You will both be joining us at the Burrow, won't you?"

They nodded happily, eager to spend a day in their daughter's world, among the people who were so important to her.

"Shall we?" James gestured to everyone and began heading off the grounds to apparate back to the Burrow.

"Not me."

All eyes turned to Sirius, except for Hermione who looked dutifully away.

"You're not coming?" Harry asked with obvious disappointment.

Sirius shook his head. "No, I'm afraid I _do_ have to work, actually."

"Come on, Sirius! No one at the Ministry will miss you for a few hours," James argued. "Most of them will be at the party anyway."

"I'm sorry. Next time."

"That's alright, Sirius. I understand." He offered a half-hearted smile.

"Anyone want to make a wager that my mum won't be so forgiving?" Ron mumbled under his breath.

Sirius laughed. "Send Molly my regrets. Congratulations again, each of you."

"Yeah, thanks," Ron grumbled.

They group began to disband as they all headed off to the celebration. Hermione's father caught Sirius' eye briefly and shook his hand again. "It was a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr. Black."

The younger man smile humbly. "The pleasure was mine."

Hermione slowly fell back as her parents followed the Potters across the grounds. She didn't look up but she knew Sirius was still standing only feet away.

"I was thinking about Dumbledore's speech, what he was saying about – "

"Time." Sirius broke in.

"Yes," She looked to him. "I was thinking, perhaps we –"

"Come on, Hermione!" Ron bellowed across the grounds. "We've got to apparate your parents!"

Hermione waved to Ron in acknowledgement, frustrated. Looking back up at Sirius, she sighed regretfully, "Well… thank you for coming."

Without pausing for a response, she strode briskly toward the gates of Hogwarts, chastising herself for her cowardice with each step that took her farther away from Sirius.

She reached Ron, who stood impatiently on the road waiting for her. "Finally," he said sarcastically.

"Don't even start with me, Weasley."

Taking hold of her mother's arm, Hermione said shortly, "Hang on". With a turn, they vanished on the spot.

* * *

**Thank you, friends, for reading! Please, share your thoughts if you have a moment.**

**I am always open to your messages; suggestions and feedback are always welcomed!**


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter nor any of JK Rowling's wonderful characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **Thank you to every single person who has stopped by to read this story and those who've shared their reviews. Most of all, to Countess of Abe, the best friend a sometimes writer could ever have.

**Chapter Twenty-Four.**

* * *

How odd, Hermione thought, the clarity that comes with letting everything you've ever wanted slip right through your fingers.

But clarity it was. And as Hermione watched her friends and family celebrating all around her, her future with Sirius pulled away beyond her reach, and she knew with every cell of her being that she would never again feel about anyone the way she felt about him.

Over and over in her mind she replayed the moment, just a few short hours earlier, when she had left him on the Hogwarts grounds… walking away entirely of her own volition. She cursed herself repeatedly as the image continued on a reel through her mind.

"And so let us raise our glasses to the graduates! The future of the Wizarding world has never looked so bright as it does today."

James' toast concluded to cheers from the gathering of loved ones, congratulating Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

Hermione offered a smile and raised her glass mechanically for all of the beaming faces around her. Her eyes skipped from one face to the next, each magnifying the realization that this moment meant nothing without Sirius' face among them.

Hermione nudged her way through the crowd, eager to escape… where, she was not certain, but the magnitude of what she was missing, of Sirius' absence was threatening to overwhelm her entirely. She nodded politely at blurred faces enjoying the festivities, choking back a sob as she pushed past them even more quickly.

Someone shoved a butterbeer into her hand. She muttered a thank you without looking up. The kitchen door was a few feet away and she could escape into the relative privacy of the Burrow.

She was sure she would soon burst from the pressure building up inside her. Just as she reached the doorway, Molly Weasley stepped in front of her.

"Oh my dear," Molly fretted, "you look rather peaky! Are you quite alright?"

Hermione swallowed thickly and nodded. She felt she couldn't breathe. She needed to escape.

A voice behind her and hands upon her shoulders stopped her momentarily.

"She's fine, Molly. Aren't you, Hermione?" James' voice soothed Molly as he ushered Hermione quickly away. Taking swift steps away from the crowd, James quickly whispered under his breath to her. "I will distract them. You'll have less than ten seconds to apparate without being noticed."

Everything was happening around her in a flurry of activity. "Pardon?"

James kept his eyes on the crowd. "I will distract them, so you can go."

"Go... Where?"

James shot her an incredulous look. "To go tell that git best friend of mine that you're still in love with him."

"James... I-"

"Hermione, I'm giving you ten seconds. You know you'll never get out of here on your own. It's up to you."

Hermione took one last glance around at the gathering, each person dear to her, yet she knew that the only place she ever wanted to be was in Sirius arms again. None of it, none of it mattered without him.

She looked up at James as tears welled in her eyes and nodded.

Without a second's hesitation he pointed his wand at the corner of a tattered tablecloth across the party. Instantly, the fabric ignited in flames.

Molly shrieked and began yanking her wand out of her apron pocket. "Aguamenti!"

James looked over his shoulder at Hermione and mouthed, "Go!"

She sucked in a breath and, picturing the very place Sirius would be, turned on the spot. With adrenaline coursing through her veins, she whirled away.

With a loud "POP", Hermione appeared on the road in Hogsmeade. With a glance back at the dark village, she took off at a run up the path. Unbeknownst to her, she was echoing the very steps, following the same path that Sirius once tread when he was racing to find her before it was too late. Now, here she was - as she approached the gates of Hogwarts- and, it seemed, it was too late. The grounds were dark and with a raise of her wand, she uttered a brief spell, confirming that the wards had been placed around the school.

"Someone must be on duty…" she muttered to herself, standing on her toes to peer across the grounds.

"Who z'at," a gruff voice slurred from the darkness within the gates.

Hermione gasped and jumped back. "Lumos!" Her wand, however, was useless beyond the protective wards.

A stocky figure stumbled up to the massive bars and gripped them, pulling his face toward her into the glare from her still lit wand.

"Mundungus!"

The drunken and unscrupulous Order member grinned sloppily. "'Evenin', Granger. Forget yer not a student 'ere anymore?" He chuckled to himself.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Mundungus, I thought Sirius was on duty tonight."

"Nope, he ain't." He hiccupped loudly. "Just me an' Moody 'ere."

"Where did Sirius go?" Hermione asked impatiently.

"Ehhhhh…." He furrowed his weathered brow, deep in drunken contemplation. "Don't know," he finally shrugged.

She let out an exasperated sigh. "Perfect."

Thinking of the next most likely place she'd find him, Hermione turned away from the gate. "Goodnight," she called over her shoulder to the snickering Mundungus.

Then, clearly envisioning her desired destination, Hermione spun on her heel and apparated away without another word.

The streetlights were flickering dully in the familiar courtyard when a loud pop echoed through the foggy London night. Hermione, not taking her usual precautions in her haste, had apparated directly in front of number 12 Grimmauld Place. She charged up the stairs and rapped impatiently upon the door.

Nothing.

Knocking again, she pressed her ear against the door to hear any movement from within.

Again, nothing.

Once more she knocked soundly. This time, a great disturbance arose from within.

"What sort of guests does my BLOOD-TRAITOR son have at all hours of the NIGHT?" a shrill voice screamed.

The portrait of Sirius' mother, Hermione recalled. Her shoulders sagged in defeat. Had Sirius been home, he would have awoken to silence his mother's shrieking portrait, if nothing else. With one last fruitless glance upward to see if any lights had turned on in the house, she turned to leave.

But she had not considered any other locations to search for him. He could be anywhere.

Hermione was not ready to give up, however, and as soon as the next possible place he would go popped into her head, she turned quickly and disappeared on the spot.

She landed hard on her feet in an alley, near a recognizable dumpster and an even more familiar phone booth. Hastily forcing open the sliding door, Hermione picked up the phone and dialed 62442,tapping her foot while she waited for a response.

"Hello and welcome to the Ministry of Magic. I'm sorry but the Ministry has closed for the evening. Please return dur-"

Hermione didn't wait to listen to the rest of the greeting. If the Ministry was closed, she wouldn't be able to get in even if Sirius was inside. They had greatly increased security upon realizing that Hogwarts students were able to easily gain access to the Ministry after hours.

Remus, James, and their families were all at the party so it was doubtful that Sirius would be at either of their homes. She had to be certain though.

Apparating first to the Potter's home then the Lupin's, Hermione found them as she had suspected, empty.

She paced in front of the Lupin's house, chewing on her lower lip. One last place crossed her mind. That she would even consider it as a possibility proved all the more to Hermione that she was clinging to her last tiny splinter of hope… but it was worth a look.

Another "Pop", and Hermione found herself standing in front of the very place she'd imagined… her parents' home.

The house was dark; its stillness disturbed only by the faint breeze that ruffled the trees looming over head.

The darkness of the house seemed to wrap itself around her, tightly smothering the hope within that had urged her on from place to place all night.

Hermione let out a shallow breath.

Of course, she thought, it was silly to believe he would be here, of all the places he could go. Something inside her had wanted so badly to believe that he would have come here, to find her, just as she had for him.

She wrapped her arms tightly around herself and perched on a garden bench across the street from her childhood home.

This wouldn't be the end, she told herself. No, she was certain she would always love him.

It was, however, the end of any chance of her and Sirius being together. She somehow knew that if she didn't find him, if she couldn't explain to him everything she had realized, then the walls they were both slowly building around their hearts would grow just strong enough to keep the other out.

It would be too late. She gazed up at the unlit windows of her parent's home and shook her head.

No, it was too late.

Maybe too much had happened. She had missed too much of his life and she would never be able to know all that he had been through during those years. Because of that, until he shared all that had happened between their past and his present, she would never be able to move forward with him.

Bowing her head in a thoroughly defeated nod, Hermione stood to apparate back to her new flat. With a sigh, she spun a final turn and disappeared into the night.

She reappeared miles away, back in London at the ground level of her walk-up flat. Far down the road she could hear the sounds of revelry from the pubs near the heart of the city. The light-hearted voices made Hermione's heart feel all the heavier.

She craned her neck up at the dark façade of her new building, the flat which she had only rented the previous day. She hadn't anticipated returning there tonight seeing as it was empty with the exception of her bed and a few boxes that had been sent from the school. Her plan had been to stay at the Burrow after the party but… she knew she couldn't go back there tonight after having left so abruptly.

The thought of walking into her bare and lifeless flat was incomprehensible to Hermione but she couldn't very well apparate from place to place all night hoping for an perfect ending to this tragic story. That, she knew, simply wasn't going to happen.

She began trudging up the dark stairwell to her door, not comfortable lighting her wand in full view of people out on the street. At the top of the first flight of stairs, she lit her wand, guiding her steps up the rest of the way to her door. The realization that she had failed overwhelmed her and she was suddenly overcome.

She resignedly raised her wand to lower the wards she'd set in place but stopped instantly at a muffled sound behind her. She whirled around, her wand still held aloft, and was met, face-to-face, with the very man she'd been searching for.

He had a vaguely amused look on his tired face. "You ought to have applied to be an Auror with reflexes like those."

"Sirius," she panted, her heart thundering away in her chest so loudly it echoed in her ears. She must have been imagining him, a perfect mirage in the midst of her angst.

"What are you doing here?"

"I went to the Burrow and they said you'd gone. They said I might find you here."

The tiny glow of hope, the hissing embers of the nearly extinguished flame inside of her, began to grow.

"You went to the Burrow?"

He nodded.

"I… I wasn't at the Burrow…" was all she could think to reply.

He offered a small smile and took a step toward her.

The realization came in an instant. She realized that she'd been wrong. It wasn't too late. She still had an opportunity. She had right now.

"I mean to say," she shook her head to try and clear her thoughts, "I was looking for you."

The playful glint returned to his eyes. "I know."

She took a deep breath and summoned her courage. "I need to tell you something."

Sirius nodded calmly, his eyes never leaving hers.

Hermione realized she hadn't a clue how to explain herself to him. His eyes bore down into hers and she averted her gaze.

She started off slowly but went on, attempting to rationalize her feelings to him. "I know- It seems you and I have gone back and forth over this but, as I see it, there does not seem to be any other solution to this predicament other than coming to a mutual agreement as to which direction we intend to go with the matter at hand. Either we, after discussing the shared benefits of…."

She became aware that she was rambling. Dropping her shoulders in surrender, she sighed, "Oh hell."

Sirius' searing gaze faltered as his eyebrows rose in silent laughter. "Pardon?"

Hermione lifted her eyes to meet his. "I am so in love with you, Sirius," Hermione confessed in a single breath.

She took one step forward then half-ran, half-fell the remaining distance between them. Within seconds her arms were going round his neck and their lips met at long last.

A heat from within her began to burn with more ferocity than she had ever experienced; first, within her chest, then spreading throughout her body out to the very tips of her fingers.

Her mouth opened to gasp for air and he seized the opportunity to deepen the kiss, not allowing her a chance to escape this sacred moment. He ran his fingertips down her cheek, tilting her head, guiding her closer.

Hermione was dizzy with the scent of him, the coarse hair on his chin tickled her neck, he overwhelmed her every sense.

She was aware of every cell of her being, tingling as Sirius' heat coursed over her.

Sirius crushed her body against his, her sweater gathered tightly in his clenched fists.

She felt her legs go weak.

She felt her eyes spill over with tears.

She felt alive.

Her hands dug into his hair. She shuddered at the unmistakable growl he emitted.

Again and again, their connection deepened, Sirius lifted Hermione, bringing her closer, her feet hovering above the ground.

The joyous tears which glided down Hermione's face, fell upon Sirius'. His hand moved of its own accord to wipe the stray tear from Hermione's cheek.

Their lips parted, though not so far as they couldn't still feel the warmth of the other's breath, neither wanting to end the incandescent moment in which they'd been held captive.

"Sirius..."

His eyes burned down upon her, the glint of excitement and passion within them belied his stern expression.

"I still want this," Hermione whispered. "I'd be crazy to deny it any longer."

His mouth was set in a firm line.

"Say something?" She asked, searching his face for any sort of reaction.

He shook his head. "Is there really reason to do any more talking?"

He reached for her and, cupping her face in his rough hands, he brought his mouth to hers.

"Wait," she rushed breathlessly.

He pulled back faintly. "You want me to... _wait_?" his voice was hoarse with anticipation, a pained grimace upon his face.

Hermione knew that this reunion would be short-lived if they didn't overcome the obstacles that had kept them apart. They had to face reality.

"Sorry… yes," She apologized. "There's just something I think we ought to - "

Instantly, something dawned on her. She knew exactly what needed to be done.

"Would you come inside with me, Sirius?"

He eyed her curiously. "Yes, of course."

She quickly lowered the wards and pushed open the door of her flat. Sirius followed her into the dark room, empty but for a few boxes stacked neatly against the wall. As Hermione set the fireplace to life, the flames cast an amber glow across the room, illuminating the large stone basin in a far corner.

Hermione turned from the hearth and followed Sirius' eyes to the intricate marble basin. She crossed the room and ran her fingers along its edge.

"A pensieve?" Sirius asked, his brow creased in confusion.

"I want to see, Sirius," Hermione said softly, looking into the empty bowl. "Show me what I missed. Show me who you were after I left."

"No, Hermione," Sirius said, approaching her slowly. "I don't want to think about the past anymore. My dwelling on the past has caused too many problems already."

"You can't ignore the past," She said quietly. "It is part of who you are."

"But I don't want to be that person anymore. If I have you now, Hermione, we can forget – "

"No. No more trying to forget. I think we both know that is futile." Hermione turned around to find Sirius standing so close to her that their bodies brushed against one another with every breath. "Please, Sirius. I want to see."

"Hermione…"

"Please."

For a long moment the two stood watching the other, both wanting to touch, to kiss… to alleviate themselves of so much yearning and desire but neither moving. Both finally wanted a future together but neither was ready. There could be no future for them as one unless they defeated the past that would haunt them forever.

The silence lasted so long Hermione was certain he would deny her this request.

Sirius was the first to break the silence.

"Alright," He nodded.

"Thank you," Hermione whispered.

Sirius drew his wand from within his coat. He held Hermione's gaze as he raised his wand to his temple, then closing his eyes he began to withdraw a long, silvery strand that he waved into the pensieve. Memory after memory he added to the basin until the final recollection was united with the others.

They both stood over the pensieve, watching the silver vapor swirl about, merging and mixing, a shimmering light cast upon their faces.

Hermione looked up at Sirius.

"Thank you for this."

He gazed down at her, mesmerized by the reflection of the basin's glittery contents in her chocolate brown eyes.

She took his hand and began to lean forward into the pensieve but was held back by his strong grip. Turning, she saw creased lines of worry upon his brow and uncertainty in his eyes.

She took a slow yet purposeful step toward him. Rising up on her toes, she kissed him softly on the lips. The kiss was brief and chaste but conveyed every bit of encouragement and strength that Sirius needed at that moment.

He offered a brief smile and, leaning into the pensieve together, they began to fall. They tumbled down farther and farther until they landed roughly on a cold stone floor, at Hogwarts.

Hermione didn't have to ask Sirius when this memory had occurred, she knew at once. They were standing in the middle of the Great Hall as a battle waged on against the Slytherins. Hermione knew instantly because she was watching a familiar scene, Sirius' lifeless body plummeting to the earth.

Hermione clutched her chest as she watched the scene unfold around her. She saw the crowd of students surge forward as Sirius' body collided with the ground.

She turned her face away from the impact… and saw herself. She was being pushed back by the influx of students, horror-stricken, desperately trying to force her way through the crowd.

Turning back to where Sirius' body had fallen, Hermione slowly approached the younger version of the man beside her and gazed down at him.

"You remember this," Hermione said pointedly, realizing he must have been conscious for this memory to exist.

"Yes," He answered distantly. "Not clearly but I was conscious."

Hermione watched as James and Remus crouched over the younger Sirius' body, calling out for help.

The rubble that had barricaded the entrance to the Hall was blasted overhead where it suspended in mid-air. The Slytherins involved in the fight took their chance to hastily slip away as the Professors rushed in.

Dumbledore suddenly appeared at Sirius' side. He knelt beside the young man and spoke softly under his breath as he waved his wand over Sirius' chest.

A tear rolled down Hermione's cheek. She shook her head slowly.

"I thought you were dead," she whispered. "I was sure of it. I fought so hard to reach you but I-" She turned her head to the place where she'd been standing. She was gone. "- disappeared."

Hermione watched as Professor McGonagall hastened past her, making a beeline toward the fallen Sirius.

"Oh Albus," She said, horrified. "What have they done?"

Dumbledore's response was muffled in Hermione's ears as she could focus only on Sirius' limp body rising slowly, levitated by Madam Pomfrey. His hovering form floated ahead of her as she, followed by Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall, retreated from the room solemnly.

Hermione stood beside the youthful figures of James and Remus watching their best friend, lifelessly being carried away. James let his head fall into his hands and, as Hermione's heart broke for him, the room fell away around her.

The tears flowed freely down her face and she turned in the darkness to find Sirius. She wanted to tell him that she'd seen enough, that she couldn't bear to see any more pain.

Before she could stop it from happening, a flame burst to life before them instantly, bringing the next memory into focus.

Dancing flames cast shadows across the otherwise pitch darkness of the Gryffindor Common Room. Hermione knew it must have been very late; the room which was usually buzzing with activity was silent and abandoned.

A brief movement though pulled her attention to a corner of the room near the hearth.

And there sat Sirius, turning a piece of parchment over and over in his hands. He stared into the fire, an intensity in his eyes that Hermione could not decipher.

She crossed the room to stand before him. His youthful face appeared to have already aged. Dark shadows beneath his eyes gave away the many nights he'd spent in fitful, turbulent sleep.

His eyes scanned the few words on the paper though it appeared he already knew each word from memory. His brow furrowed, a low growl emitted from his throat. His fist crushed around the crisp parchment until his knuckles turned white and Hermione feared he may actually draw blood. Stepping forward quickly, Sirius hurled the crumpled paper into the flames.

Hermione lunged toward the fire, determined to learn what had made Sirius react this way. On her knees, Hermione leaned into the hearth before the paper was destroyed. The parchment slowly unfurled as the flames nipped away at the edges. She could make out only a few words of the letter before it was consumed by the flames but it was all she needed to recognize what it was.

_When we meet again, please forgive me. I wanted to tell you_-

Her letter to Sirius. The letter she'd been writing before Sirius came to her that day. The day they had shared both the most intoxicatingly blissful moment and the terrifying tragedy of the fight.

Hermione sat back on her heels, her breath caught in her throat. She had completely forgotten about the letter… never considered that someone would find it or that it would make its way to Sirius' hands. She turned her face toward the young Sirius in the memory.

He stood glowering at the fire, his eyes fixated on the blue heat of the flames until the parchment was reduced to ash. He breathed deeply and his furious mask began to break, revealing the distraught young man beneath.

"You were angry with me," Hermione said to the man who had witnessed this scene from the far side of the room.

"Only for giving me cause to hope," He answered. "Lily found that letter under your bed months later, while packing to leave at the end of the year. We had all been made to accept that you were... gone."

The memory began fading out.

He continued, "That letter, what you only alluded to in that letter made it impossible for me to forget you, to move on."

"I'm so sorry," she whispered, her voice trembling.

"No, Hermione," Sirius spoke as the next memory unfolded around them. "You did nothing wrong. This is why I didn't want you to see this..."

She opened her mouth to reply but was silenced when she heard a woman's voice speaking in Sirius' memory.

She turned to see a still young Sirius, probably in his mid-twenties, walking along a snow-covered sidewalk with a woman.

She was stunning, Hermione couldn't help but observe. She also could not ignore the pang of jealousy that stung in her chest as the woman reached out and clasped Sirius' hand.

Hermione fell into step behind them.

"What do you think?" the woman asked him, her emerald green eyes inquisitive.

"About what?" replied Sirius distractedly. He stared distantly, as though deep in thought.

She smiled, revealing her perfect white teeth. "Weren't you listening? My parents have invited you for Christmas. You will come, won't you?"

Sirius slowed his pace to a stop but neither spoke nor looked at the young woman.

"Sirius?" She looked at him expectantly.

He glanced up at her. Hermione didn't know how he would deny this girl anything. She was so lovely, looking up at him with snow falling upon her shiny black hair.

"Where are you, Sirius?" She asked softly.

His brow creased in question. "What do you mean?"

"I'm in London... but you, you're somewhere else. It's as though you're here but completely absent all at once."

"Sorry," he said, looking up at the clear night sky.

The woman smiled sadly at him. "I wouldn't be so bothered by it if... if I wasn't in love with you."

Hermione watched in complete captivation, afraid to breathe that she might miss his response.

She didn't know if she could bear to hear him confess his love for this woman, though she wouldn't be able to blame him if he had.

Instead he just stared at her. He stared at her as though her words were spoken in a language completely foreign to him. "I..."

Hermione sucked in a sharp breath.

"I know," said the woman. "I didn't expect that you'd say it back. I just wanted you to know how I felt, just once."

Sirius began to apologize but was silenced when her arms wrapped around him tightly.

A tear traced down her cheek and she embraced him. "I can't live with the ghost of someone you are still in love with, hovering over us both at every turn. I had hoped it would have faded by now but you seem to be pulling further and further away."

"I'm sorry."

She shook her head sadly. "Don't be." She turned to slowly walk away, leaving Sirius standing on the snow covered road, looking on.

Hermione clutched her heart, how much had Sirius not experienced? How much he missed out on, all because of her?

"Did you love her?" She asked him hesitantly.

"I wanted to."

She silently urged him to go on.

"I wanted to be in love with her. I thought, if I could convince myself I loved her, I would be able to forget you. Turns out, it made it worse. She only reminded me of what I'd lost."

"Did you ever see her again?"

He shook his head. "No."

The high pitched whistle of the Hogwarts Express blaring somewhere overhead interrupted them.

The setting was unmistakable. Hermione knew from the sound, the smells, that they were now standing on Platform 9 ¾. An eleven- year old Harry stood before her surrounded by his parents and Sirius. James and Lily fawned over their son, dreading saying goodbye.

A smile played at the corners of Hermione's mouth as she watched her best friend, loved by a family he may have lost.

The young Sirius stood back from the Potters, staring across the sea of people directly at a first-year Hermione. She stood with her parents, looking both eager and apprehensive. The young girl turned slightly as though she had sensed someone watching her. Her large brown eyes met Sirius' gaze.

Their matched stare held for only a few seconds. The young Hermione's face relaxed into a near smile, a spark of recognition.

Sirius' expression spoke of such complexity it was impossible to tell how he might be feeling. Hermione moved toward the young Sirius but just as she approached, he turned and left the Platform briskly, muttering a hasty goodbye to his godson.

Hermione took one last glance back at the younger version of herself to see that the girl was watching Sirius curiously as he departed.

Darkness fell upon them again but this time Hermione did not push him to speak. He had hovered behind her silently as the scene played out.

She had only ever imagined what it must have been like for him; to be forced to watch her grow up, all the while knowing that one day he would have to face their past again.

Even more haunting was the knowing gleam in the eyes of her young self, as though she already knew.

Hermione turned to Sirius, broken. "I don't know how you managed it… I can hardly stand it and I've only just witnessed seconds of your life."

Sirius' hollow expression moved past her to focus on something in the background. She turned to see an office coming into shape.

Stacks of files and documents fell into piles around her, lining the walls that were forming around an imposing oak desk.

A familiar figure slumped back in the well-worn leather chair behind the desk, rubbing at his eyes. Sirius sighed heavily, releasing a great yawn. He flipped through a thick stack of parchment documents before settling on one, his brow creased in concentration.

A clock mounted on the wall behind Sirius ticked loudly, verging on midnight.

Hermione crept toward the seated wizard, taking in his weary features. His hair had been cropped, gone was the tousled mane she'd grown so fond of at Hogwarts. He appeared very much a man who had thrown himself wholly into his work.

An abrupt crash startled her, though Sirius remained seated, glancing up only with his eyes as the door flew open.

"James," Sirius greeted his friend with a tired nod.

Stone-faced, James responded only, "She's back."

Sirius froze. "Is she… How is she?"

"Unconscious still; the healers were with her when I left".

Sirius nodded solemnly. "Does Harry know?"

"I've sent an owl to him at school." James sank into an armchair in front of the desk. "What are you going to do, Padfoot?"

"I am going to continue researching this file," he answered with stoic indifference. "My report is due next week." Sirius shuffled the documents on his desk busily.

"What are you going to do, Sirius?" James repeated.

Falling back in his chair, Sirius shrugged. "I haven't a clue." He dropped his head in his hands. "I haven't a clue, James".

Hermione observed Sirius, lost as he seemed, noticing how he suddenly looked so small behind that great oak desk. She stepped back as once more the memory around them dissipated in long wisps of grey smoke.

Hermione stepped back as the next memory began taking shape. Ceiling high windows lined the walls of a stark white hospital room; Hermione recognized it as her room at St. Mungo's.

Shadowy figures slowly came into focus. Hermione heard Sirius suck in a sharp breath beside her.

"This will be the last,' He said.

Hermione couldn't speak to respond for directly before her was herself, laying unconscious beneath crisp white sheets, pale as the sheets themselves. Beside her bed was Sirius, clasping her frail hand.

He gazed so intensely at her face, searching her features as though each second he was seeing them for the first time. He spoke to her so softly, barely a word fell upon her ears. She drifted silently nearer.

"Hermione," he whispered. "Please open your eyes."

Her sleeping self moved only in the slow rise and fall of her chest with each breath.

"Wake up, Hermione," he pleaded, his voice rough with exhaustion.

He moved to sit beside her.

"Hermione, please come back."

Sirius cupped her face in his hands.

"Hermione, wake up. You must look at me."

Leaning down, he touched his forehead to hers, breathing her in deeply.

"I am nothing, Hermione," he swallowed thickly. "I am nothing more, or less, than what I see in your eyes when you look at me."

He kissed her forehead.

"Please come back to me, Hermione."

Silent tears streamed down the observing Hermione's face all the while. She turned to Sirius without a word and wrapped her arms around him tightly.

"Please, no more," she said softly.

Instantly, they drew back from the pensieve.

Hermione stood in a momentary daze, adjusting to the feel of returning to reality. She tilted her head back to look directly at Sirius.

"Did you mean what you said?" Hermione asked through her tears.

Sirius nodded with certainty.

"And what do you see now in my eyes?" She asked.

He touched his fingertips to her cheek and looked deeply into her eyes for what felt like both the first time and the thousandth time.

"Everything, Hermione," Sirius touched his forehead to hers. "Everything that was, everything that is, and everything that we will ever be."

Finally, caught somewhere in between time, Sirius wrapped Hermione in his arms and took her breath away.

* * *

**The End.**


	25. Epilogue

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter nor any of JK Rowling's wonderful characters. I am merely borrowing them.

**A/N: **I just couldn't let it go just yet….

**Epilogue. **

Hermione beamed up at Sirius. It was growing cool outside in the garden as the sun dipped further behind the trees. She trailed her hand around the back of his neck, weaving her fingers through his shorn hair which was finally beginning to grow out again. He smirked at her before leading her into a full twirl across the dance floor, the orchestra's melody rising and falling filling the evening air with flourishing notes.

Hermione spun as Sirius' strong hands guided her back into his arms and pulled her firmly against his chest.

Her eyes traced every beautiful feature of his face, contemplating him.

"When did you first know?" She asked him.

"Know what?" He cocked his head to the side and winked at her before whirling them around again.

"That you loved me?"

Sirius smiled to himself and answered without a moment's hesitation.

"That night at Hogwarts, under the tree... we looked at the stars. You were supposed to be with James."

"That's when you knew?" She asked, her eyes wide at the realization.

"That's when I knew," He confirmed.

"Oh…" Was all she could think to say. She gazed back at the love of her life in awe of him.

"And you, love?" He asked her, taking advantage of the slow-turn in the music. "When did you know?"

Hermione bit her lip and lowered her eyes shyly. "The first time I fell in love with you was in my fifth year... under the mistletoe."

It was Sirius' turn to be in awe.

"You remember that?" He asked, his voice laced with shock.

"Of course, I remember."

"And... the second time?"

"I fell in love with you the second time, when we first kissed - "

"Under the tree..." Sirius finished.

"Yes. Under the tree," She smiled dreamily at him.

"You've fallen in love with me twice, eh? Any other times I should know about?"

"Sirius, darling, I fall in love with you all over again, every time you smile at me."

The two simply gazed at one another, swaying together as the orchestra reached its crescendo.

The announcer's voice broke the spell between them as he interrupted the fading notes of the song. "Ladies and Gentlemen, let us raise our glasses once more for the guests of honor, the new Mister and Mrs. Sirius Black."

The garden erupted in applause and cheers.

Hermione flushed as they stood in front of their family and friends, her simple white satin gown appeared to glow in the brightening moonlight. Sirius, looking every bit the groom in a classic black tuxedo, reached for Hermione's hand and she laced her thin fingers through his as they beamed out at the applauding guests.

"What are you waiting for?" Shouted Fred. "Kiss her, you fool!"

Sirius' laughed and grinned at his best man, nodding in acquiescence.

Sirius cupped his new bride's face in his strong hands. He lowered his face toward her, reveling in their long anticipated union with a kiss that stirred the depths of their souls. When they broke apart, he rested his forehead against Hermione's and whispered, his voice hoarse with emotion, "I love you". Hermione gazed up at him, her eyes shining with tears of joy and love. "I love you too," She whispered with shaky breath.

Over the din of the crowd, the voice of the best man, James Potter, carried itself over the applause as he shouted merrily, "It's about time!"

Laughter rang out along with shouts of agreement.

Indeed, it _was_ about time. Time had brought them together and time had torn them apart. Time had tested them with pain and blessed them with love. And now as time had stood still, they had finally pledged their vows and made their promises.

A promise twenty-two years in the making.

For now, after all that had come to pass, they found themselves wholly and finally together… and so they would stay, forever.


End file.
